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I am the very model of a Scientist Salarian...


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#1
masterryan005

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I've studied species turian, asari and batarian.
I'm quite good at genetics (as a subset of biology)
Because I am an expert (which I know is a tautology)

I'm also quite familiar, too, with matters dealing medicine.
I'll diagnose and treat the galaxy's most sickly quarian.
I've cured most deadly plagues that bring populations to their knees....
....to their knees...bees, sees, fees...Got it!
And I've learned to greatly limit the average amount of fertile Krogan seeds!

And he's learned to greatly limit the average amount of fertile Krogan seeds!
And he's learned to greatly limit the average amount of fertile Krogan seeds!
And he's learned to greatly limit the average amount of fertile Krogan-ogan seeds!


My xenoscience studies range from urban to agrarian,
Tuchanka, Illium, Omega, and those far more alien.
In short, in matters turian, asari, and batarian.
I am the very model of a scientist salarian.

In short, in matters turian, asari, and batarian,
He is the very model of a scientist salarian!


I know the numerous details of several species' chemistry,
From elcor to the volus, from evolution to anatomy,
Krogan reproduction, and the dextro-amino acid strains,
Of which turians and quarians form their cells and organs, bones and veins.

Humans are unique with their wide array of gene diversity,
My research of Collector technology shook society,
About beings' reaction to stress, my knowledge remains precise,
Those seeking support in intercourse, I can offer my advice.

Those seeking support in intercourse, he can offer his advice!
Those seeking support in intercourse, he can offer his advice!
Those seeking support in intercourse, he can offer his ad-his advice!


This vast supply of knowledge covers every living sapient.
My brilliant hardened mind is virtually omniscient.
In short, in matters turian, asari, and batarian,
I am the very model of a scientist salarian.

In short, in matters turian, asari, and batarian,
He is the very model of a scientist salarian!


Beyond scientific expertise, I've also skills in combat,
Killed people, once with farm equipment, many other violent acts.
One probably wouldn't tell from my exterior appearance.
In fact I'm quite familiar in subjects involving ordnance.

Though I've no trouble eliminating those I see as dangerous,
I can't deny that things I do are considered to be heartless,
Ethics and morals in the past have proven somewhat conflicted....
...conflicted, that's tricky...how about...
But know it's for learning, growth, not death, for which I am addicted!

But know it's for learning, growth, not death, for which he addicted!
But know it's for learning, growth, not death, for which he is addicted!
But know it's for learning, growth, not death, for which he is addict-addicted!


With my military past, I'll put a bullet in your head with ease.
I've disposed of ruffians almost as frequently as disease.
But still, in matters turian, asari, and batarian
I am the very model of a scientist salarian!

But still, in matters turian, asari, and batarian,
He is the very model of a scientist salarian!


....

*cough*

Edited by masterryan005, 23 February 2010 - 08:39 PM.


#2
massive_effect

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Mordin

#3
Mr. MannlyMan

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If Mordin isn't part of my crew in ME3, I'll just... die.

#4
Jewsapalewsa

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Hot damn!


#5
Hero_Shep

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awesome stuff

#6
Pocketgb

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Posted Image

#7
v.dog

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Forget the Elcor version of Hamlet- The Salarian version of The Pirates of Penzance I would pay actual money to see. :D

#8
masterryan005

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Glad you liked it, but I was wondering: has BioWare made/released an official full length Scientist Salarian? I'd sell a limb for the lyrics, and I'd sell my first born son if Mordin actually sang the whole thing.

#9
tommythetomcat

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I'm torn I don't if I like his Kirk-esque dialog more or his singing.

#10
Jazharah

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/me misses the *cough* at the end. Otherwise spot-on :D nice to see it like this.