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Alistair, post-coronation... and/or Alistair gush thread (Origins/Awakening Spoilers)


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#23726
LadyDamodred

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Herr Uhl wrote...

LadyDamodred wrote...

Technically, no, I don't think it's the way Fereldan men usually come.  However, for the purpose of sparing our eyes, it's better this way in the game.


I take offence at this statement.


Srsly.  If real life penises were like the mod's pixel ones, I would become a lesbian.

#23727
Skadi_the_Evil_Elf

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[quote]KnightofPhoenix wrote...

[quote]LadyDamodred wrote...

I am curious now. Does the Chantry prefer circumcision?
I do not think Medevial Latin Europe used to have that the practise. Jews, Muslims and Greek Orthodox Christians did.

So Alistair should simply not have the option. Loghain, possibly (the hair). [/quote]

Technically, no, I don't think it's the way Fereldan men usually come.  However, for the purpose of sparing our eyes, it's better this way in the game.[/quote]

It warms the heart to see women preferring the "snipped" version. 
Which Alistair does not have canonically Posted Image [/quote]

Technically, probably few, if any in Ferelden, come in the "trimmed" variety.

Until about the 20th century, Circumcision amongst gentiles in Europe was very rarely practiced. In fact, as late as WW2, it was even used by some SS/**** troops as a way of indentifying Jews, since gentile men rarely ever got the snip.

Outside the Middle east, the practice of circumcision is limited in the general population.

So, methinks that snipping the frumpy coat off the little purple helmeted soldier is probably a very rare practice in Ferelden.

#23728
Kryyptehk

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Herr Uhl wrote...

Kryyptehk wrote...

Herr Uhl wrote...

LadyDamodred wrote...

Technically, no, I don't think it's the way Fereldan men usually come.  However, for the purpose of sparing our eyes, it's better this way in the game.


I take offence at this statement.


Uhl, you have to realize that depending on where a woman comes from, she may have never seen an un-circumcized one. I never have, personally, so I prefer snipped.

Bewbs a few days ago, balls a few pages ago, now penises.


I've only seen a handful of snipped ones. And I've seen more penises than I could possibly want to see.


I can't speak from experience (I've only seen one, yeah, go ahead and make fun of me) but I think most men in the South are circumcised.

#23729
cmessaz

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Kryyptehk wrote...

cmessaz wrote...

We now move onto.....asses?


I like big butts and I cannot lie.

I'm like George Washington in that respect.

Posted Image

#23730
Skadi_the_Evil_Elf

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And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)

#23731
cmessaz

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Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)

I just can't stand the elephant trunks laying around Ferelden.

#23732
Axekix

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Kryyptehk wrote...

cmessaz wrote...

We now move onto.....asses?


I like big butts and I cannot lie.

I'm like George Washington in that respect.

Aren't we all? 

BAM!!
Posted Image

#23733
Herr Uhl

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Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)


What disadvantages?

#23734
Kryyptehk

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Herr Uhl wrote...

Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)


What disadvantages?


Snipped men are supposed to not have as much feeling in their...sausages because the foreskin itself has a bunch. So sex isn't as pleasurable for them as with un-snipped men. But snipped men are supposed to last longer because of this.

#23735
KnightofPhoenix

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Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...
Technically, probably few, if any in Ferelden, come in the "trimmed" variety.

Until about the 20th century, Circumcision amongst gentiles in Europe was very rarely practiced. In fact, as late as WW2, it was even used by some SS/**** troops as a way of indentifying Jews, since gentile men rarely ever got the snip.

Outside the Middle east, the practice of circumcision is limited in the general population.

So, methinks that snipping the frumpy coat off the little purple helmeted soldier is probably a very rare practice in Ferelden.


Yes, I thought as much.
Semitic contribution to womankind eh? lol

I personally have a theory on how the practise developped, as Semitic peoples were experts when it comes to breeding (the Arabian horse is the result of very carefully planned breeding). And I believe this practise is part of those breeding skills, applied to humans. But the theory is too long and way off topic to explain.  

#23736
Skadi_the_Evil_Elf

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Herr Uhl wrote...

Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)


What disadvantages?



Unsnipped has better tactile properties during the act. As well as not as prone to...errr...unpleasant fritction-relarted problems.

#23737
Herr Uhl

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Kryyptehk wrote...

Herr Uhl wrote...

Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)


What disadvantages?


Snipped men are supposed to not have as much feeling in their...sausages because the foreskin itself has a bunch. So sex isn't as pleasurable for them as with un-snipped men. But snipped men are supposed to last longer because of this.


Awesome!

#23738
Thor Rand Al

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My oh my, interesting conversations in the last couple of pages lmao.

Penises and circumsitions, are you all out for pain or something





*Backs quietly up out of thread*

#23739
Kryyptehk

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KnightofPhoenix wrote...

Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...
Technically, probably few, if any in Ferelden, come in the "trimmed" variety.

Until about the 20th century, Circumcision amongst gentiles in Europe was very rarely practiced. In fact, as late as WW2, it was even used by some SS/**** troops as a way of indentifying Jews, since gentile men rarely ever got the snip.

Outside the Middle east, the practice of circumcision is limited in the general population.

So, methinks that snipping the frumpy coat off the little purple helmeted soldier is probably a very rare practice in Ferelden.


Yes, I thought as much.
Semitic contribution to womankind eh? lol

I personally have a theory on how the practise developped, as Semitic peoples were experts when it comes to breeding (the Arabian horse is the result of very carefully planned breeding). And I believe this practise is part of those breeding skills, applied to humans. But the theory is too long and way off topic to explain.  


But I thought the trend started with the Jewish? Or am I wrong?

I know, I know, I shouldn't drag us off topic, but I'm curious!

#23740
mellifera

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I have nothing to add to this conversation sooo.... derp

Posted Image

#23741
Herr Uhl

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Kryyptehk wrote...

KnightofPhoenix wrote...

Yes, I thought as much.
Semitic contribution to womankind eh? lol

I personally have a theory on how the practise developped, as Semitic peoples were experts when it comes to breeding (the Arabian horse is the result of very carefully planned breeding). And I believe this practise is part of those breeding skills, applied to humans. But the theory is too long and way off topic to explain.  


But I thought the trend started with the Jewish? Or am I wrong?

I know, I know, I shouldn't drag us off topic, but I'm curious!


Jews are Semitic.

#23742
Kryyptehk

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Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

Herr Uhl wrote...

Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...

And for the record, after witnessing both forms in real-life, snipped is a bit more preferable.. Both in the aesthetics and hygeine departments. However, it also has disadvantages. So an unsnipped Alistair certainly is no great detriment. ;)


What disadvantages?



Unsnipped has better tactile properties during the act. As well as not as prone to...errr...unpleasant fritction-relarted problems.


This too. It can be very unpleasant especially for...

no, I don't think I'll be going that far into TMI territory lol

#23743
Kryyptehk

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Herr Uhl wrote...

Kryyptehk wrote...

KnightofPhoenix wrote...

Yes, I thought as much.
Semitic contribution to womankind eh? lol

I personally have a theory on how the practise developped, as Semitic peoples were experts when it comes to breeding (the Arabian horse is the result of very carefully planned breeding). And I believe this practise is part of those breeding skills, applied to humans. But the theory is too long and way off topic to explain.  


But I thought the trend started with the Jewish? Or am I wrong?

I know, I know, I shouldn't drag us off topic, but I'm curious!


Jews are Semitic.


You'd think I'd know that, I'm dumb. Ignore me.

#23744
Skadi_the_Evil_Elf

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KnightofPhoenix wrote...

Skadi_the_Evil_Elf wrote...
Technically, probably few, if any in Ferelden, come in the "trimmed" variety.

Until about the 20th century, Circumcision amongst gentiles in Europe was very rarely practiced. In fact, as late as WW2, it was even used by some SS/**** troops as a way of indentifying Jews, since gentile men rarely ever got the snip.

Outside the Middle east, the practice of circumcision is limited in the general population.

So, methinks that snipping the frumpy coat off the little purple helmeted soldier is probably a very rare practice in Ferelden.


Yes, I thought as much.
Semitic contribution to womankind eh? lol

I personally have a theory on how the practise developped, as Semitic peoples were experts when it comes to breeding (the Arabian horse is the result of very carefully planned breeding). And I believe this practise is part of those breeding skills, applied to humans. But the theory is too long and way off topic to explain.  



It certainly has some health benefits for both sides, both short and long term.

For short term, it reduces infection likelyhood in both sexes. In the long term, it reduces risks of certain diseases to either sex.

I was surprised to learn that while a very common practice amongst non-Jews in the U.S., it is still not as widespread in other Western countries, especially in Western and Central Europe. Certainly not the full-snip jobs you get back home.

#23745
KnightofPhoenix

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Kryyptehk wrote...
But I thought the trend started with the Jewish? Or am I wrong?

I know, I know, I shouldn't drag us off topic, but I'm curious!


They made it into a religious duty, but no the practise was before them.

Some say it's Egypt. Other theories say it started with Semitic bedouins in the Arabian Peninsula (that's where the Hebrews come from originally, as all Semitic peoples). A main reason is to avoid getting sand in there, of course.
But I theorise that other reasons were at play, including increased performance.

The reason I believe it started with Semitic peoples is that most Semitic peoples did that practise, including Canaanites, Phoenicians, Assyrians, Amorites...etc.

Modifié par KnightofPhoenix, 19 mai 2010 - 04:05 .


#23746
Kryyptehk

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KnightofPhoenix wrote...

Kryyptehk wrote...
But I thought the trend started with the Jewish? Or am I wrong?

I know, I know, I shouldn't drag us off topic, but I'm curious!


They made it into a religious duty, but no the practise was before them.

Some say it's Egypt. Other theories say it started with Semitic bedouins in the Arabian Peninsula (that's where the Hebrews come from originally, as all Semitic peoples). A main reason is to avoid getting sand in there, of course.
But I theorise that other reasons were at play, including increased performance.


But how would they know about increased performance? Unless they observed from the horses you mentioned? Or did someone accidently get theirs snipped off and noticed it has benefits?

#23747
Serissia

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Sand in the foreskin... that must be brutal.

#23748
Herr Uhl

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Serissia wrote...

Sand in the foreskin... that must be brutal.


It is.

#23749
mellifera

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Speaking from experience?

#23750
Skadi_the_Evil_Elf

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Kryyptehk wrote...

KnightofPhoenix wrote...

Kryyptehk wrote...
But I thought the trend started with the Jewish? Or am I wrong?

I know, I know, I shouldn't drag us off topic, but I'm curious!


They made it into a religious duty, but no the practise was before them.

Some say it's Egypt. Other theories say it started with Semitic bedouins in the Arabian Peninsula (that's where the Hebrews come from originally, as all Semitic peoples). A main reason is to avoid getting sand in there, of course.
But I theorise that other reasons were at play, including increased performance.


But how would they know about increased performance? Unless they observed from the horses you mentioned? Or did someone accidently get theirs snipped off and noticed it has benefits?



The snipping probably came first, then benefits later realized. There are tons of theories as to why the practice was started, from health to reducing the frequency of masturbation, which, in many early societies, was frowned upon because it caused a waste of valuable seed, in a time when humans were keen on breeding as many people as possible, due to shorter lifespans and primitive medical care.