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[CaptainZaysh]

There once was an arms deal on Illium;
Goddamn bloodbath. I was the only one who made it out alive.

[DoNotIngest]

Garrus told Shep he wanted a bro moment,
He said, "Wouldn't that be a broment?"
He shot him a dirty look,
So his comany he forsook,
And went to Engineering for an alien homent.

[Wentletrap]

kglaser wrote...

OK, now I'm becoming irate.
I'm sure ME3 will be great.
But no matter how small,
Any info at all
I don't want before the release date!!!

When by spoilers I'm feeling annoyed,
I just re-read these rhymes we've enjoyed.
In the time that it's taking
for ME3's making,
more limericks will help fill the void.

-----------------------------------------------------

I know of a Quarian machinist
whose longing for Shep was the keenest.
But her poor immune system
went nuts once she kissed him –
so these days, her suit ain't the cleanest.

-----------------------------------------------------

Tali'Zorah came on to me shyly,
so last night I was humping her dryly.
At a critical juncture,
she got a suit puncture –
now her fever is running quite highly.

[Madness1]

Councilor Udina's actions draw sighs,
choosing Anderson would've been wise.
However, with Joker at the helm
the Reapers cannot overwhelm
Shepard and his faithful allies.

Modifié par Madness1, 10 juillet 2011 - 08:40 .

[Silent X]

Will you check out the suit on that quarian--
More modest than any Victorian!
Every square inch of skin
Is securely shut in,
Safe from even the spores of a Thorian.

--------

I would never have guessed that the Keepers
Were really just tools of the Reapers.
Vigil told me the score.
I was totally floored.
All my shocked Shep could manage was, "Jeepers!"

[utdan]

(liara)
I once saw her azure
to which i could only scream "more"
but since i have died
i doubt she even cried
and now she's just one big chore

(wrex)

his homeworlds name is Tuchanga
where pyjacks increase his huge hunga'
but his family armor we have got
so on virmire he didnt get shot
to which wrex remarked "cowabunga"

i've heard of a prothean squad-mate
whos making the boards quite irate
but with tentacles so large
i'll show him who's in charge
and during the love scene, masterbate

Ok that last one was so wrong
but in my cheek was my tongue
Its time for me to flee
or soon, hated i'll be
aswell as banned before long.

[Wentletrap]

Jacob Taylor...  so fit and so trim.
Tonight we'll make love, me and him.
I'll start at his Terminus,
enjoying its firmness –
then work my way towards his Far Rim.

Modifié par Wentletrap, 15 juillet 2011 - 04:30 .

[Captain_Obvious]

It's time, my friends,
to necro this thread.
We can't be without
limericks that shout
I'll play ME3 'til I'm dead.


Jack was rejected at poetry she had tried,
poor Miranda has woes being with being fertilized.
Shepard's come to understand 
being the Shadow Broker's not that grand,
unless she wants to see TMI. 

[SpectreSeven]

The Reapers are invading,
Cerberus is crusading.
The Alliance is falling back,
Surprised by this vicious attack.

Situation is extremely dire,
Mercs aren't available for hire.
Busy looking out for number one,
How shall this war be won?

Time for Shepard to start thinking...
Or all life will cease blinking.