CalJones wrote...
Yes I think Alistair telegraphs his hatred pretty well throughout the game. The problem is that, if you're a more merciful or pragmatic sort, there's no option to disagree with him or tell him that you would prefer to solve this without violence. Ultimately Alistair feels betrayed because he never got to know the real you, and that's his own fault. (Well, maybe not his fault...it's just the way he's written). Up until the rose dialogue he never even considers that the PC has his/her own issues - in fact he doesn't even tell the PC about the taint death sentence until several conversations in, like it's an afterthought (and then only if you have enough approval). It's all about him.
I agree, and its that self-centeredness that really turns me off Alistair as a romance option. My PC's just feel he is unreliable and even the one where my HNF romanced and married him, she was shocked at how he put his own feelings before the welfare of Ferelden and before his love.
Alistair makes it clear he hates Loghain. However, he never questions what Arl Howe or even Anora are up to, and what parts they have played in the events that unfolded. He just sees everything in black and white and jumps to conclusions. So, even a hardended Alistair puts his own hatred before anything else.
At the Landsmeet, Alistair is not just prepared to dump his love, he is also prepared to break his oath to the Wardens (a vow he cannot break, and which he gave to Duncan as well as his fellow Wardens) while knowing that Wardens are the only ones who can defeat the archdemon. He steps away from that battle, even after Riordan explains that it is better to have more Wardens - ignoring the advice from the senior (his superior). So, in pursuing death for Loghain, he abandons his love, his oath and his country. For someone who has been trained to be disclipined and responsible, this comes across like a little boy having a tantrum because he can't get his own way immediately. His, "I'm not playing anymore. I'm taking my ball and going home" attitude left my PC's thinking she didn't know him. He may feel betrayed but he betrayed far more.
That said, I like Alistair, think he is brilliantly written and acted. Being a weak, gullible man is not necessarily an issue - if you are RPíng an ambitious HFN. It may be just what you want if you want to grab power for yourself

All of the characters have shades of grey. All are complex. Alistair is the least loyal of them all, unless you leave him unhardened and don't put him on the throne. How that would play out in the future though is anyone's guess. He could even end up hating his love for denying him the throne.
But, this isn't an Alistair thread. I'm not convinced that Bioware will give any characters a happy-ever-after but for Origins, I keep returning to the companion who is the most open, honest and loyal. Zevran.