!but like they say show must go on thank you for the support amigos
Dragon age: A wired wired comedy -Read at your own risk!
Débuté par
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
, mai 26 2010 11:15
#26
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 18 novembre 2010 - 06:31
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still can't belive ppl read this !
but like they say show must go on thank you for the support amigos
!but like they say show must go on thank you for the support amigos
Retour en haut
#27
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 25 novembre 2010 - 07:18
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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Warden and The sister but not from sister act one two or three, where having a short conversation
Warden: "So...... they kidnapped you to I take it?"
leliana: "More like sister-napped,,"
Warden: "What happened?"
leliana: "Well I was busy minding my own business, when two ugly guys came in the chapel and bribed with with......blue shoes"
Warden: "Why am I not surprised"
leliana: "But these shoes, they where not just any shoes...."
Warden: "Let me guess, they actually fit on your feet?"
leliana: "How did you know?"
Warden: "Why did I ever let you join me in the first place?"
leliana: "Because I was stalking you until you accepted me?"
Warden: "right that was the reason"
Director: "Ok peeps places"
Director: I want to see more action this time, I want it to bounce like Madonna's chest, I want it to sing like a...something that sings,"
Warden: "Wonder why Bioware have not realised were missing"
leliana: "There to busy making DA2 to notice where gone and kidnapped"
Alistair: "My dear warden I shall be forever by your side,"
leliana: "So sweet"
Warden: "Fine do you want him?"
Alistair: ".....?"
leliana: Really?"
Warden: "Yeah"
leliana: "Yay, Come here my dear Alistair, we shall make sweet peanuts together"
Alistair: "You leave my peanuts alone"
leliana grabs hold of Alistair's shirt and plants a kiss on his lips
leliana: "Your mine now" (evil grin)
Alistair: "For all the love of bunny's, help me"
Warden: "Let me know when the wedding starts"
leliana: "Ahhhh, we can get new shoes"
leliana drags Alistair by his collar as she walks off the stage
Warden: "I'm actually happy she came along"
Director: Lights camera action
leliana: I apologize for interfering, but I couldn't just sit by and not help.
Warden: I was happy to save your life
leliana: Save my life? I assure you the game auto saves it for me
Warden: Fine. It's time for me to go, anyway..
leliana:Are we getting a move on? Can we stop for shoes?.
Warden: I am going to... wait. What?
leliana: Shoes,!!
Warden: What about shoes?
leliana: Your going to save the world right?, you need nice shoes
Warden: I am pretty sure, the forces of evil cheese loving bunnies, won't care about my shoes
leliana: Oh, am I getting ahead of myself? So sorry.
Warden: Your either insane, or shoe crazy, which is it?
leliana: I just escaped from the mental institute for Bards last weekend
Warden: That explains a lot, welcome aboard!
leliana: Yay, I'm gonna kill you in your sleep
Warden: Wait...what?
leliana: I said ...I am going to enjoy watching you sleep
Warden: Creepy
Director: And cut!
Warden: "I am going to sleep with one Eye open"
leliana: I am going to sleep with Alistair
Warden: Where is he anyway?
leliana: Locked him in the chest of draws, for safe keeping
Warden backs away from the bard slowly
(no Idiots, Bards or shoes where hurt in the making of this chp, just one confused Nun, and a Bi monkey, as always nothing makes any scene what so ever, and it's totally crap, thank you for watching good night!)
Warden: "So...... they kidnapped you to I take it?"
leliana: "More like sister-napped,,"
Warden: "What happened?"
leliana: "Well I was busy minding my own business, when two ugly guys came in the chapel and bribed with with......blue shoes"
Warden: "Why am I not surprised"
leliana: "But these shoes, they where not just any shoes...."
Warden: "Let me guess, they actually fit on your feet?"
leliana: "How did you know?"
Warden: "Why did I ever let you join me in the first place?"
leliana: "Because I was stalking you until you accepted me?"
Warden: "right that was the reason"
Director: "Ok peeps places"
Director: I want to see more action this time, I want it to bounce like Madonna's chest, I want it to sing like a...something that sings,"
Warden: "Wonder why Bioware have not realised were missing"
leliana: "There to busy making DA2 to notice where gone and kidnapped"
Alistair: "My dear warden I shall be forever by your side,"
leliana: "So sweet"
Warden: "Fine do you want him?"
Alistair: ".....?"
leliana: Really?"
Warden: "Yeah"
leliana: "Yay, Come here my dear Alistair, we shall make sweet peanuts together"
Alistair: "You leave my peanuts alone"
leliana grabs hold of Alistair's shirt and plants a kiss on his lips
leliana: "Your mine now" (evil grin)
Alistair: "For all the love of bunny's, help me"
Warden: "Let me know when the wedding starts"
leliana: "Ahhhh, we can get new shoes"
leliana drags Alistair by his collar as she walks off the stage
Warden: "I'm actually happy she came along"
Director: Lights camera action
leliana: I apologize for interfering, but I couldn't just sit by and not help.
Warden: I was happy to save your life
leliana: Save my life? I assure you the game auto saves it for me
Warden: Fine. It's time for me to go, anyway..
leliana:Are we getting a move on? Can we stop for shoes?.
Warden: I am going to... wait. What?
leliana: Shoes,!!
Warden: What about shoes?
leliana: Your going to save the world right?, you need nice shoes
Warden: I am pretty sure, the forces of evil cheese loving bunnies, won't care about my shoes
leliana: Oh, am I getting ahead of myself? So sorry.
Warden: Your either insane, or shoe crazy, which is it?
leliana: I just escaped from the mental institute for Bards last weekend
Warden: That explains a lot, welcome aboard!
leliana: Yay, I'm gonna kill you in your sleep
Warden: Wait...what?
leliana: I said ...I am going to enjoy watching you sleep
Warden: Creepy
Director: And cut!
Warden: "I am going to sleep with one Eye open"
leliana: I am going to sleep with Alistair
Warden: Where is he anyway?
leliana: Locked him in the chest of draws, for safe keeping
Warden backs away from the bard slowly
(no Idiots, Bards or shoes where hurt in the making of this chp, just one confused Nun, and a Bi monkey, as always nothing makes any scene what so ever, and it's totally crap, thank you for watching good night!)
#29
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 25 novembre 2010 - 09:25
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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Wonder what devs at bioware would think if they saw this o.O
Warden: They probably question your sanity
Dalira: If they have not done so already
Warden: They probably question your sanity
Dalira: If they have not done so already
Modifié par Dalira Montanti, 25 novembre 2010 - 09:29 .
#30
Posté 25 novembre 2010 - 09:28
Matchy Pointy
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They are probably too busy laughing to think 
#31
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 25 novembre 2010 - 09:30
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suprised they have not kicked me off there site for being to wired anyways more to come tommrow or tonight depending on my coffee intake
#32
Posté 25 novembre 2010 - 09:38
Moogie M
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Yay! More Weirdness!!! This keeps tickling my funny bone~ X3
#33
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 25 novembre 2010 - 10:11
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as long as it wont stab any ones funnny bones im ok with that ^^"
#34
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 12:01
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Warden: well let's go and save someone in a cadge
Morrigan: I doubt we would find anyone in a cadge here
Warden points at a cadge with a man inside it
Warden: You must hate it when I'm right
Morrigan: You got lucky
The team (not including Alistair because the crazy Bard locked him away), make there way to the cadge, (joy).
Warden: Oh shiny
Big dude: "Shok ebasit hissra. Meraad astaarit, meraad itwasit, aban aqun. Maraas shokra. Anaan esaam Qun."
Warden: what is he saying?
Morrigan: How am I supposed to know?
Warden: You speak cheeseanese?
Morrigan: No such thing
Big Dude:You aren't one of my captors.
Warden: Bright Aren't we?
leliana: I remember the revered Mushroom, mentioning this man. She called him a Handy randy super dooper candy man from the far north.
(Audience gasp)
Warden: Oh your back?...Where's Alistair?
leliana: In my love slave Den...I mean bed chamber...
Warden: Right.....Keeping close eye on you
leliana: Oh you my approval not High enough to kill you yet
Warden: What?
leliana: I said...umm my Approval is not high enough to...bed Fred yet
Warden: Who's Fred?
leliana shrugs
Big Dude: It is as she says
Warden: So what are you supposed to be?
Big Dude: A pretty butterfly?
Warden: weirdo
Big Dude: I'm in a cage, am I not? I've been placed here by the YMCA.
Warden: Poor fella
Leliana:The revered Mushroom said he slaughtered all the doughnuts. Even the Jam ones.
Big Dude: Correct
Warden: So do you have a name?...Script just says Big Dude..
Big Dude: I am Sten of the Bread and Jam--the vanguard--of the qunari peoples.
Warden: Nice to meet you, How about we get you out?
Sten: The cadge is locked
Leliana: Oh oh over here let me let me oh oh *waves hands franatically*
Warden: sure give it a try
Leliana: Crazy Bard powers activate weeeeee
Warden: Amazing the power of crazynesss opend the cadge
Leliana: See told you I come in handy
Warden: Why am I not suprised....
Sten:May we proceed? I am eager to be elsewhere.
Leliana: Candy Moutain
Warden: Lets get the heck out of Lothering
Morrigan: I doubt we would find anyone in a cadge here
Warden points at a cadge with a man inside it
Warden: You must hate it when I'm right
Morrigan: You got lucky
The team (not including Alistair because the crazy Bard locked him away), make there way to the cadge, (joy).
Warden: Oh shiny
Big dude: "Shok ebasit hissra. Meraad astaarit, meraad itwasit, aban aqun. Maraas shokra. Anaan esaam Qun."
Warden: what is he saying?
Morrigan: How am I supposed to know?
Warden: You speak cheeseanese?
Morrigan: No such thing
Big Dude:You aren't one of my captors.
Warden: Bright Aren't we?
leliana: I remember the revered Mushroom, mentioning this man. She called him a Handy randy super dooper candy man from the far north.
(Audience gasp)
Warden: Oh your back?...Where's Alistair?
leliana: In my love slave Den...I mean bed chamber...
Warden: Right.....Keeping close eye on you
leliana: Oh you my approval not High enough to kill you yet
Warden: What?
leliana: I said...umm my Approval is not high enough to...bed Fred yet
Warden: Who's Fred?
leliana shrugs
Big Dude: It is as she says
Warden: So what are you supposed to be?
Big Dude: A pretty butterfly?
Warden: weirdo
Big Dude: I'm in a cage, am I not? I've been placed here by the YMCA.
Warden: Poor fella
Leliana:The revered Mushroom said he slaughtered all the doughnuts. Even the Jam ones.
Big Dude: Correct
Warden: So do you have a name?...Script just says Big Dude..
Big Dude: I am Sten of the Bread and Jam--the vanguard--of the qunari peoples.
Warden: Nice to meet you, How about we get you out?
Sten: The cadge is locked
Leliana: Oh oh over here let me let me oh oh *waves hands franatically*
Warden: sure give it a try
Leliana: Crazy Bard powers activate weeeeee
Warden: Amazing the power of crazynesss opend the cadge
Leliana: See told you I come in handy
Warden: Why am I not suprised....
Sten:May we proceed? I am eager to be elsewhere.
Leliana: Candy Moutain
Warden: Lets get the heck out of Lothering
#35
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 12:12
Sinmara
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cheerful... *laughing loud*
I will never see this scene in the game without this in mind.... :-)
I will never see this scene in the game without this in mind.... :-)
#37
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 12:28
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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glad you guys liked it more to come
#38
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 10 décembre 2010 - 01:07
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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Wired noob type dude:"Where going to kill you"
Warden: "......"
Wired Wired other wired noob type dude: "I don't know if you killed the king, I missed the Cut-scene, but maker forbid I don't give a pizza;s arse.
Warden...."......."
Wired noob type dude: "Theirs a bounty on your head and it come in handy, hand cream dose not come cheap"
Warden: "........"
Wired noob type dude: "Well aren't you gonna say something?"
Warden: (Barks)
Slightly more intelligent Wired noob type dude: "Hey your not the warden"
Truffles Barks Happily
Wired noob type dude: "We can't kill the dog"
Slightly more intelligent Wired noob type dude: "lets just leave and come back, other people playing the warden, will come threw sooner of later"
(wired bandits leave)
Warden: "Best cake ever...wait wheres my Armour?"
Leliana:" Sorry I got board, and dressed up your dog, while you started to eat cake"
Warden: You took my armour off...while I was eating...?"
Leliana nods her head
Warden: ".........."
Leliana smiles
Warden: ".....*sighs*...."
Leliana: "Truffles looked adorable"
Warden: "......I am..safe being alone with you right?"
Leliana: "No"
Warden: "oh....boy...."
mean while in a dungeon far far far far far far far far far far and far away wait it's under the chantry...
That's not that far.......who wrights these things.....
Director: "And cut"
Leliana: "Yay, now to free Alistair from his chains"
Warden looks at Morrigan and backs away slowly
Warden: "Hey Morrigan what are you doing?"
Morrigan: "Downloading"
Warden: "What you downloading?"
Morrigan: "New personality, on E-bay"
to be-continued because it's late ^^"
Warden: "......"
Wired Wired other wired noob type dude: "I don't know if you killed the king, I missed the Cut-scene, but maker forbid I don't give a pizza;s arse.
Warden...."......."
Wired noob type dude: "Theirs a bounty on your head and it come in handy, hand cream dose not come cheap"
Warden: "........"
Wired noob type dude: "Well aren't you gonna say something?"
Warden: (Barks)
Slightly more intelligent Wired noob type dude: "Hey your not the warden"
Truffles Barks Happily
Wired noob type dude: "We can't kill the dog"
Slightly more intelligent Wired noob type dude: "lets just leave and come back, other people playing the warden, will come threw sooner of later"
(wired bandits leave)
Warden: "Best cake ever...wait wheres my Armour?"
Leliana:" Sorry I got board, and dressed up your dog, while you started to eat cake"
Warden: You took my armour off...while I was eating...?"
Leliana nods her head
Warden: ".........."
Leliana smiles
Warden: ".....*sighs*...."
Leliana: "Truffles looked adorable"
Warden: "......I am..safe being alone with you right?"
Leliana: "No"
Warden: "oh....boy...."
mean while in a dungeon far far far far far far far far far far and far away wait it's under the chantry...
That's not that far.......who wrights these things.....
Director: "And cut"
Leliana: "Yay, now to free Alistair from his chains"
Warden looks at Morrigan and backs away slowly
Warden: "Hey Morrigan what are you doing?"
Morrigan: "Downloading"
Warden: "What you downloading?"
Morrigan: "New personality, on E-bay"
to be-continued because it's late ^^"
#39
Posté 10 décembre 2010 - 02:08
Matchy Pointy
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Nice chapter, I love the doog
#40
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 10 décembre 2010 - 06:40
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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Glad you liked it more to come 
#41
Posté 10 décembre 2010 - 06:42
Sinmara
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I hope so too - if I need something to smile this is one place I'm looking at :-)
#42
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 11 décembre 2010 - 11:41
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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I will try to add more today
#43
Posté 11 décembre 2010 - 11:46
Sinmara
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I'm looking forward this with a smile before...:-)
#44
Posté 11 décembre 2010 - 12:02
Matchy Pointy
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Always the best place to go for a smile
#45
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 13 février 2011 - 09:03
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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since dragon age 2 is coming out soon iv'e wrecked my brain trying to finish this so iDalira like to announce that next 4 chps will be up by Friday night
#46
Posté 13 février 2011 - 09:05
Sinmara
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wonderful news ...cant wait for it :-)
#47
Posté 14 février 2011 - 05:37
Matchy Pointy
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Oh, that sounds wonderful indeed, this story always brings me to a good mood
#48
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
Posté 25 avril 2011 - 02:04
Guest_Dalira Montanti_*
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warden: to the camp mobile
warden and her team walk half way out of lothering and come across a bridge with.....suprise Darkspawn
Dawrf: somebody save us
Warden: the hobbits need saving
Alistair: I think there dawrfs
Warden; I think your an idiot
Alistair: we will marry someday
warden walks up to the dawrfs
Warden: hello little fella whats wrong?
Dawrf: ummm nothing really.....just the same old...under attack party
Warden; mind If I join in?
Dawrf: sure just don't get killed
warden saves the dawrfs
morrigan -50
warden: what the heck was that for?
Morrigan: -30
morrigan: I felt like spamming you with negativaty
warden: would it kill you to be ncie just once?
morrigan:*morrigan smiles and glass mirrors are heard shattering in the distance*
warden: ah I think I will stick to moody
dawrf: thank you for saving us,
warden: your welcome, now we must go and save the world from the blight with no information or any idea on how to do it
Alistair: were just that awsome
Dawrf: we will stay here and magically transport to your camp even if were not invited
warden: Dawrfs don't do magic
Dawrf: Humans can't fight out of a paper bag
Warden; Dawrfs dont breath fire
Dawrf: Humans look wired
warden: Is that the best you can come up with?
Dawrf: yeah pretty much
Leliana: we must be off to camp for a cutscne
morrigan: *is plotting something evil*
warden and team id fearwell to the hobbits.....as they leve for the camp mobile the warden is hit by a magical sign that appeard in front of her
SIGN: theres no turing back if you go this way lothering will be *spoilers* and then *spoilers* most likely *spoilers* with a hint of *spoilers*, do you wish to proceed?
warden: someone click ok my arm stuck in this damn animation
morrigan hits "ok" with her staff
a cutscne appears from noware yay? like we have not had enough of them already
*start msuic*
*the Archdemon is watching a cooking program*
tv: "And this is how you BBQ Wardens, next I will show you how to rip off there arms and use them as lovely decor for the home cave".
Archdemon: my army of under cooked chicken burgers will be epic hahahahahahaha
end of wired cutscnene
Warden wakes up from her nightmear
Alistair: nightmears huh?
Warden: what you read minds now?
Alistair: no you shouting "OMG SIMON WON'T BE ON XFACTOR ANYMORE" kind you know gave an impresson
Warden: it just wont be the same with out him *sobs*
Alistair pats warden on the back
Alistair: there there...theres always dragon age 2 to look forward to
Warden: I suppose...
Warden: thank you for cheering me up
Alistair: ahhh dose that mean were married now?
Warden: no!
Alistair: *sighs* so close
warden and her team walk half way out of lothering and come across a bridge with.....suprise Darkspawn
Dawrf: somebody save us
Warden: the hobbits need saving
Alistair: I think there dawrfs
Warden; I think your an idiot
Alistair: we will marry someday
warden walks up to the dawrfs
Warden: hello little fella whats wrong?
Dawrf: ummm nothing really.....just the same old...under attack party
Warden; mind If I join in?
Dawrf: sure just don't get killed
warden saves the dawrfs
morrigan -50
warden: what the heck was that for?
Morrigan: -30
morrigan: I felt like spamming you with negativaty
warden: would it kill you to be ncie just once?
morrigan:*morrigan smiles and glass mirrors are heard shattering in the distance*
warden: ah I think I will stick to moody
dawrf: thank you for saving us,
warden: your welcome, now we must go and save the world from the blight with no information or any idea on how to do it
Alistair: were just that awsome
Dawrf: we will stay here and magically transport to your camp even if were not invited
warden: Dawrfs don't do magic
Dawrf: Humans can't fight out of a paper bag
Warden; Dawrfs dont breath fire
Dawrf: Humans look wired
warden: Is that the best you can come up with?
Dawrf: yeah pretty much
Leliana: we must be off to camp for a cutscne
morrigan: *is plotting something evil*
warden and team id fearwell to the hobbits.....as they leve for the camp mobile the warden is hit by a magical sign that appeard in front of her
SIGN: theres no turing back if you go this way lothering will be *spoilers* and then *spoilers* most likely *spoilers* with a hint of *spoilers*, do you wish to proceed?
warden: someone click ok my arm stuck in this damn animation
morrigan hits "ok" with her staff
a cutscne appears from noware yay? like we have not had enough of them already
*start msuic*
*the Archdemon is watching a cooking program*
tv: "And this is how you BBQ Wardens, next I will show you how to rip off there arms and use them as lovely decor for the home cave".
Archdemon: my army of under cooked chicken burgers will be epic hahahahahahaha
end of wired cutscnene
Warden wakes up from her nightmear
Alistair: nightmears huh?
Warden: what you read minds now?
Alistair: no you shouting "OMG SIMON WON'T BE ON XFACTOR ANYMORE" kind you know gave an impresson
Warden: it just wont be the same with out him *sobs*
Alistair pats warden on the back
Alistair: there there...theres always dragon age 2 to look forward to
Warden: I suppose...
Warden: thank you for cheering me up
Alistair: ahhh dose that mean were married now?
Warden: no!
Alistair: *sighs* so close
#49
Posté 25 avril 2011 - 02:13
Sinmara
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roooooooofl I love this humore
worth for a signature :-)Humans can't fight out of a paper bag
#50
Posté 25 avril 2011 - 02:19
Phaffner
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lol, like it all but the marring Alistar bit....sorry but not in my world....
Modifié par Phaffner, 25 avril 2011 - 02:20 .
