9058 réponses à ce sujet

[LupusYondergirl]

Especially if your warden was a human mage, since they're apparently related to Hawke!

Modifié par LupusYondergirl, 27 octobre 2010 - 04:14 .

[Avilia]

I don't like Isabela very much 'sweet thing' - I'll sweet thing her.  I learned my Duellist by playing cards with her.


Okay, I know its technically early, but I've finished my prompt response. As I'm deeply into instant gratification, I have to post it now.

My prompt response. What would Anders do if Pounce turned into a human for a day. My answer? Panic.

................

"Ha!" Realising he'd yelled, Anders looked around furtively. No one appeared to have noticed, thank the Maker, so he went back to the spell. It had taken him two years but he thought he'd finally worked it out. Every spare moment he'd found had been spent on this cursed spell.

They said it was impossible. What did 'they' know? Not much as far as he was concerned. Now to gather the components and find himself a likely test subject.

"Come on Pounce, we're off to gather herbs." Scooping the cat up, he let it crawl up across his shoulders, until it found its balance. "Best tell Ceri, or we'll be in trouble later." Pounce mewed. "I am not." Refusing to listen to the cat telling him he was afraid of Ceri, Anders, walked quickly through the Vigil until he finally found her in the kitchen.

"Ceri. Sweetheart. Pet."

"Anders! I'm making pies. Make sure you're hungry later." Noticing the cat resting across his shoulders, she shook the spoon at him. "Meat pies, I'll save one for Pounce."

"I'm sure he'll appreciate that. We're off after herbs." Thankfully she was distracted and only nodded. "Do you need any?"

"No. Have fun." Looking up after he'd gone, Ceri narrowed her eyes at the doorway. "What are you up to Anders?" Oh well, she'd find out eventually. One way or another.

. . .

Pounce mewed. "I know its damp." Anders glared down at him. "You're a cat, don't you come down here all the time? Or do those rats you leave half eaten kill themselves?" Another mew, this time louder. "Oh fine. Up you come." Once the cat was settled in his customary place across his shoulders, Anders went back to combining the herbs.

"You'll have to overcome your aversion to the floor soon. I need you to hunt me up a rat." Ordinarily he wouldn't use anything live for testing a spell, but unfortunately, this spell required it. If all went well the rat wouldn't be harmed. He hoped.

"There." Everything combined and ready. "Find me a rat Pounce. Go on. Rat. Fetch." He heard a low growl. "Oh fine. You're not a dog, I'm aware of that. Pretty please, find me a rat." That cat didn't seem to be moving. "If you don't find me a rat I'll try this on you. How would you like that? Not much I'd think."

Finally the cat leapt lightly down from his shoulders. It didn't run off into the dark cellar however, it stood at his feet and mewed. "No." Another mew. "No. I am not using this on you. It was an empty threat meant to coerce you into doing my bidding." A long loud screech. "Maker's sake Pounce. It could kill you. Or worse." The cat didn't seem impressed by that and mewed again. "Fine. Remember this was your decision."

How a cat managed to look smug he didn't know but this one did it. "Sit still. I need to make a circle around you with these herbs." Pounce sat perfectly still and watched Anders draw a circle on the table top.

“Good. Now for the ritual."

. . .

"A pair of boots. That's all I want. One pair of boots." And some clothes. He'd noticed that humans usually wore clothes. Unless they were mating, then they didn't wear anything. Most of the time. He'd often seen them in dark corners and outside partially clothed and mating. The rule seemed to be naked. He didn't understand why they bothered with clothes at all. Seemed silly really.

Ceri would have clothes. Ceri had everything. "Hmm, Ceri." She was tasty looking, even for a human.

. . .

It took a few tries but Anders finally managed to sit up. "Andraste's knickers. It worked! I knew it would! Huh! I'm a genius." A genius who seemed to be alone in the cellar. "Pounce? Pounce!"

Had the blast from the spell knocked him out? Concentrating was difficult, but Anders finally remembered what had happened. The cursed cat had hit him. One second he'd been admiring the results of his genius and the next, bam! He must have run off into the Keep after that.

Where would a naked former cat go? Would he want clothes? Boots? Definitely boots. He'd been nagging about those boots for as long as Anders could remember. He'd refused to get them of course, why would a cat need boots for Andraste's sake? It was stupid. Where would he go for boots and clothes? "Ceri? Ceri!"

Scrambling to his feet he lurched up the stairs and into the hallway. Kitchen.

. . .

"Why are you naked?" It took more than a naked man to scare Ceri. His sudden appearance in the kitchen may have sent the servants screeching out of the room but not her. "And who are you?"

"Ceri." She looked even tastier than he remembered. It must be because of the spell. "Pounce."

"Pardon me?" Putting the bowl down she moved around the bench to get a closer look. "Pounce is a cat." His hair was the right colour. "Did something happen?"

"Hmm." Touching her was different. "You're soft." Very soft. And smooth. "We should mate."

"Should we?" Well, definitely a tom cat. Even if not an actual one. "I have a man thank you."

"Anders? Pfft. He's afraid of you." He remembered her laugh, now it sounded different, enticing. "I want to mate."

"No thank you." He lifted her chin to look into her eyes and she had to remind herself to breath. Maker's breath. "Um. Clothes! Boots! You'd like boots wouldn't you?"

"Boots? Yes. Get me some boots." She held her hand out. "What?"

"Come on. We'll get you some boots." Giving up on waiting, Ceri took his hand. "Anders' should fit you."

. . .

The kitchen was empty. No Ceri, no kitchen staff and certainly no former cats. "Curse it." Where would they go?

The cursed cat would ask Ceri for boots. Their room then? Anders turned and raced out. Boots best be all that cat asked for. He needn't think Anders hadn't noticed the way he curled up Ceri's lap and purred.

. . .

"That's much better." Stepping back, Ceri admired her handiwork. "The boots fit nicely." It had taken some work but she'd managed to convince Pounce to wear some old clothes she'd found in the bottom of the cupboard. "Nate was a better fit than Anders after all."

"Hmm." Busy admiring himself in the mirror, Pounce didn't answer.

It seemed cats were cats even when they were human. "How long will the spell last? Do you know?"

"Anders changed me into a human." Looking at her in the mirror he smiled. "He'll have to change me back into a cat."

"Ah."

"First he has to catch me."

Ceri let out a startled gasp when he scooped her up and started running.

. . .

Nothing. Their room was empty. Where in Thedas were they!? Stomping out in the hallway he caught sight of movement and jogged in that direction.

“Pounce! Bring her back here!” Cursed thing didn’t even pause. “That’s mine!” Lifting his robe, Anders raced after them. They disappeared around a corner and he skidded after them, only to hit something and land face first on the ground.

The sound of footsteps told him the cat had tripped him. “Pounce! Bring her back! She’s mine! Pounce!”

After rolling over Anders stared up at the ceiling for a moment before trying to sit. He couldn’t, something was holding him down, some weight on his chest. Lifting his head he looked down.

“Pounce?” The cat narrowed his eyes and purred softly. What in Andraste’s name was going on? Blinking he looked around. Oh. Er. “A dream?” The bed shifted when Ceri rolled over. Yes a dream.

“Pounce?” The cat mewed. “Would you fancy a pair of boots?”

Modifié par Avilia, 27 octobre 2010 - 09:43 .

[Sarah1281]

@Avilia: Oh, this reminded me of a grown-up Calvin and Hobbes. Very amusing. I am kind of wondering why Ceri was so quick to accept that the random naked guy calling himself Pounce really was Ser Pounce-a-lot turned into a human. Does Anders do that kind of thing often?

[Avilia]

Sarah1281 wrote...

@Avilia: Oh, this reminded me of a grown-up Calvin and Hobbes. Very amusing. I am kind of wondering why Ceri was so quick to accept that the random naked guy calling himself Pounce really was Ser Pounce-a-lot turned into a human. Does Anders do that kind of thing often?

Thanks Sarah

Well, Ceri is a few archdemons short of a blight, so she'd probably accept it without blinking.  In this case though, Anders is dreaming the whole thing, so its really him I suppose.  If you want get all Jungian - he's working out his anxiety about their relationship.  Pounce running off with Ceri might represent his fear of losing her.  Pounce in his cat form is Anders' subconscious hence the internal dialogue.

Or it could just be silly story about Anders dreaming he turned Pounce in a man, who then ran off with Ceri.

Also, Puss in Boots!  I love Puss in Boots.  My favourite fairy tale. I should have put more of it in.

"My master the Marquis of Carabas."   Nothing better than a cat wearing boots imho.

(Edited for clarity)

Modifié par Avilia, 27 octobre 2010 - 05:18 .

[Miri1984]

Avilia I think I might love you. This was hilarious. And great. And hilarious. Did I mention I love you? ..... probably shouldn't have had the third glass of wine...



*mumble mumble*



Now I want boots...

[Avilia]

Miri1984 wrote...

Avilia I think I might love you. This was hilarious. And great. And hilarious. Did I mention I love you? ..... probably shouldn't have had the third glass of wine...

*mumble mumble*

Now I want boots...

Thigh high boots.  I've always wished I had the legs to pull that look off...maybe in my next life.

And aw - thanks

Modifié par Avilia, 27 octobre 2010 - 07:05 .

[Miri1984]

*head clearing a little* I missed speculation about DA2 and Isabela! I'm wondering if "the wardens" might make an appearance late in the game - specifically all the wardens that survive through awakenings. It seems that Hawke does a lot of fighting of darkspawn so it would be logical that he'll come across SOME wardens. We can only hope that includes our favs.



At least we'll have some Nathaniel. Although I totally agree - if they put Anders in but change his appearance and voice I will be full of RAEG.

[Avilia]

Miri1984 wrote...

*head clearing a little* I missed speculation about DA2 and Isabela! I'm wondering if "the wardens" might make an appearance late in the game - specifically all the wardens that survive through awakenings. It seems that Hawke does a lot of fighting of darkspawn so it would be logical that he'll come across SOME wardens. We can only hope that includes our favs.

At least we'll have some Nathaniel. Although I totally agree - if they put Anders in but change his appearance and voice I will be full of RAEG.

I'm worried about Nate now...I'm not liking the character models at all.  The backgrounds and armour look nice but the characters - ew. 

But, this is Anders time - he doesn't care about Nate's potentially heartbreaking character model in DA2.

(Erm I'd post a pic but I don't have one as I'm at work.....  Imagine this:)

Anders:  Ah, it appears you've outwitted me.  Card.
Nate:  Appearances can be deceiving, can they  not?
Anders:  A philosopher I see, Mr?
Nate:  The name's Howe, Nathaniel Howe.
Anders:  Ah, Mr Howe.  Your reputation precedes you.  *waves to the bartender*  Mr Howe will have a vodka martini, shaken not stirred.  I'll have my usual.
Nate:  Your usual?
Anders: Hmm. Soda, lime and bitters.  I have, things, to take care of later.
Nate:  *eyes the women milling around*  So I see.
Anders:  Prrrr.

[sabreene]

Awww, Avilia, I love it! Especially as a look into Anders psyche -- too funny.



On Isabela -- I would like her a lot more if she was a new Isabela, or as Sarah said, the next Dred Pirate Isabela. It's probably uncommon, but Isabela in DAO was the first NPC (excluding companions) that I thought, "Finally! A pretty character, with some personality!" So while I like the way the new Isabela looks, I miss the old Isabela.



I kind of don't want Anders to be in DA2, for fear the same thing would happen. Strangely, I'm interested in how Alistair will look. Go figure.

[Avilia]

@Sabreene thanks Its a murky place inside Anders' brain ;-)

[LupusYondergirl]

Avilia: both funny and disturbing. Anders is even jealous of his cat!

Modifié par LupusYondergirl, 27 octobre 2010 - 04:42 .

[Sarah1281]

My prompt response: 


Dalish mages could be rather terrified, Anders decided. He really should have realized that earlier but in his defense Velanna had never been quite so angry at him before. Who would have thought that turning her hair lime green would be enough to set her off so badly? He was willing to admit that he almost had a heart attack when he saw the magic sparkling from her fingers but she didn’t go after him. No, instead she zapped poor Ser Pounce-a-lot and then flounced away, leaving Anders to watch anxiously to see what she’d done to his beloved cat.
 
Poor Pounce just mewled and twisted for a few minutes before there was a flash of light and when Anders could see again, his cat was gone. In its place was an unfamiliar human. Despite Pounce being a male, this creature was most decidedly female. She was a leggy redhead with joy and innocence sparkling in her bright emerald eyes and a small upturned nose. She was also naked.
 
Now, normally this kind of situation would be a dream come true for Anders but…this was his cat. His very male cat. It felt wrong to so much as look at her. He quickly grabbed a blanket that someone had left lying in a corner of the room and threw it at her. “Put this on!” he ordered.
 
Pounce merely stared quizzically at it for a second. Maybe she would have eventually figured out what to do with it but having her standing there so completely exposed and where anyone could walk in on them at any second was really making Anders uncomfortably so he gently took the blanket from her and draped it around her. It wasn’t much but at least he could no longer see the parts that, as a male, she wasn’t even supposed to have! Still, he should really get something for her to wear that wouldn’t fall down and expose her if she let go of the ends of it or moved too quickly. But what? Sigrun’s clothing would be too short for her, Velanna’s clothing couldn’t really be called that fairly, and Angélique always seemed to know whenever anyone had been in her room and so he couldn’t very well sneak something out of there. Besides, her outfits were always very…distinctive.
 
Nathaniel chose that moment to walk into the room. He took one look at the situation in front of him and then turned right around and began to walk back out.
 
“Hey!” Anders called out. “Where are you going?”
 
“Somewhere where I do not have to watch you and your latest conquest going at it in the library,” Nathaniel responded curtly. “And since we’re on the subject, I would like to remind you that you have a perfectly good room of your own to use for things like this and so I would appreciate it if you could avoid tainting the rest of the Keep as such.”
 
“We were not tainting the Keep!” Anders exclaimed indignantly.
 
Nathaniel waved his hand. “Tainting the Keep, having sex with strangers in every room, call it what you want.”
 
“But…but we weren’t even doing that!” Anders protested.
 
Nathaniel favored him with a skeptical look. “Really. So you’re standing right next to a beautiful woman who is wearing nothing but a blanket – which I dearly hope you wash when you’re done with – for some completely innocuous reason, I take it.”
 
Despite the clear sarcasm, Anders nodded vigorously. “Yes! She didn’t have anything to wear and so I just grabbed the first thing I could see. You’re lucky you didn’t come in here two minutes earlier.”
 
Nathaniel didn’t look any more convinced. “Alright, I’ll bite. Why would she be in the library without any clothes if she wasn’t having sex with, if not you, then somebody?”
 
“Because Velanna got pissed at me and turned Ser Pounce-a-lot into a human,” Anders said, helpfully gesturing towards the girl just in case Nathaniel didn’t make the obvious connection.
 
Nathaniel’s eyebrow rose. “Last time I checked, your cat was a male, Anders.”
 
“She was really pissed,” Anders said by way of explanation. “And so it was weird to just be looking at her and so I had to cover her up somehow but I have no idea how long the spell will last or how to change it back! And if I go anywhere near Velanna then she’ll kill me!”
 
“You could just tell her how to change her hair back,” Nathaniel pointed out. “I only didn’t get here in time to see this girl naked because she stopped me to ask if I knew anything about how to get her back to normal.”
 
“And I take it you didn’t,” Anders guessed. “So does this mean you’ll help me?”
 
Nathaniel shook his head. “Anders, I don’t even believe you and if I did then I’m fairly certain that I don’t want to get involved with this. It’s…odd. And Angélique is getting back from Antiva today so I need to enjoy whatever semblances of normality I can before then.” With that, he turned once again to leave.
 
“Coward!” Anders called after him but without much bite in his words. They were all on edge since she was finally returning from her epic journey to get her sword back from the Crows. There had been all sorts of rumors about her and her friend Zevran conquering Antiva and leaving Zevran in charge of the Crows but no one really knew what was true and what wasn’t. Anders had technically been left in charge while she was away but, like when Angélique was actually here, Nathaniel had ended up doing most of the work. Anders would feel bad but, really, it was the Howe’s own damn fault for caring more.
 
Sighing, Anders turned his attention back to Pounce. He really hoped that he could get her back to normal before she got back or else she was bound to make everything far more complicated than it needed to be. “What am I going to do with you?” he murmured.
 
Pounce, sensing her master’s distress, walked over to him and began to rub against him. Now, this was perfectly fine and even appreciated when she was a cat. When she was a voluptuous young woman covered only by a thin blanket and Anders couldn’t stop thinking of his male cat, it was a great deal more awkward. With a yelp, he leapt back and ended up falling over.
 
“What was that?” Angélique asked, her attention attracted by the noise. When had she gotten back?!?! Her eyes fell upon Pounce who had lost her hold on the blanket. Angélique’s eyes lit up. “Oh, Andraste! A welcome home present! You’re so thoughtful, Anders! All Velanna did was turn her hair green and I haven’t been able to find Nate.”
 
It was times like these that Anders was grateful that he had made Oghren’s acquaintance as the dwarf had a far more colorful vocabulary than he did. “Caridin's teeth!”

[Galagraphia]

Avilia, this cat is creepy! He will get no mackerel from me anymore XD

(Although not as creepy as my Pounce who speaks like Wynne but in Marjolaine's voice)



You know, this reminded me of "Heart of a Dog" by Bulgakov. It's about how a dog was turned into a man, though is was more political satire than psychological stuff. And "Sylva" by Vercors. But your story is better XD

[Corker]

@Sarah - I had to check the thread title to make sure I was still in the Anders thread. I think your Nate stole the show!

[Galagraphia]

@Sarah, lol, there're things that can make Anders feel awkward XD

[LupusYondergirl]

@Sarah: That's fantastic. I love Angélique's reaction.

[tankgirly]

Sarah, your prompt was soo funny! (ROFL)

[Miri1984]

Angelique is just full of win. And Anders' reaction to a gender-swapped human Pounce was perfect. Lovely stuff.

[Avilia]

@Sarah - poor Anders but lol very funny (and bonus Nate yay ;-) )

[Avilia]

@Lupus He is jealous but he'll get over it (he wants to be able to curl up in Ceri's lap and purr ;-) )



@Gala aww but he's just doing what tom cats do ;-)

[Wedger]

What a fun prompt.



*waits in the corner for more stories, purring*

[Miri1984]

I think this might be part one of a two parter - there's just too much fun to be had here for it to stop. But I've used up my hour, so I'll give you guys this one and then follow with another later.

Pants For a Day


Fishy breath woke her. "Maker's arse, Pounce," she mumbled, turning her head to the side to try to avoid it. "Hasn't Anders trained you not to do that any more?" She blinked fuzzily, expecting to see the cat's nose directly in front of hers. It was his favourite way of waking her.


Instead she was presented with a very, very human face and a pair of vivid green eyes, both of which were attached to the head of a red-haired young man who was significantly lacking in clothing. 


Neria shrieked and spun out of bed. "Anders!" she screamed at her lover, who had been soundly sleeping beside her. "Anders bloody well WAKE UP!"


He grunted and opened his eyes - took in the extra guest and shrieked almost as loudly as Neria had. 


"Andraste's ******!" he swore, also jumping off the bed. "Is this some sort of joke of Zevran's?"


The man seemed unconcerned by their reactions, simply turned his head from each of them calmly. He was crouched on the bed on all fours - he'd been straddling Neria without touching her. Neria took a moment to truly take in his proportions - he was without a doubt, an extremely fine specimen of his species. Corded muscles lay over long and lean limbs and he was poised with extreme grace. Her eyes dipped downwards and she immediately felt a blush heat her face. He was an extremely fine specimen.


As though he could feel her gaze he moved, startlingly quickly, so he was lying on his back on the bed, his arms behind his head and a smile curving his lips. A soft sound escaped him as he gazed at the two of them.


Neria only just realised that they were as little dressed as the stranger and scrabbled to her dresser to pull out some robes. Anders seemed to have had the same thought, because he was doing the same on the other side of the room.


"Who are you?" she asked. "How did you get in here? We lock the door at night!"


The man's lips parted and a tongue darted out, wetting his lips in a way that seemed strangely familiar. "Fish," he said distinctly. There was something primally sexual about the way he pronounced that single word and Neria found herself gasping for breath.


"What?" Anders said. The man looked at Anders.


"Want fish," he said.


Anders found Neria's eyes. He looked as puzzled as she felt. 


"Why don't we go with clothes first," Neria said. Anders nodded and turned back to his dresser, pulling out some regular clothing. He tossed a shirt to the man on the bed, who didn't move. The shirt hit his chest and he simply looked down at it, a slightly puzzled expression marring his perfect brow.


"Fish?" he said again. Neria looked back at Anders who's mouth was open in surprise and confusion.


"What is this obsession with fish?" he asked. "You sound like a human version of Pounce......." Anders trailed off, running his eyes over the ginger hair, the green eyes, the feline grace of the reclining man. "...Neria...?" he looked up at her and she looked back at him.


Neria took a tentative step towards the bed. "Pounce?" she asked softly. The man's head turned to her and his enormous green eyes blinked. Again, the soft smile spread over his lips. 


"Mistress?" he said. 


"Maker's breath," Anders breathed. "How is this possible?"


Neria reached out her hand, automatically thinking to stroke the man's head, but stopped her hand halfway there. Fragments of her dream from the night before started to come back to her. She'd been working hard lately, on her shapeshifting. Spending a lot of time as a cat, and a hawk - prowling the halls. After the business in Orlais she was even more determined to be the best she could be at it. 


But last night she'd been dreaming of the transformation process. 


Cats have an affinity for the fade...


"I think it might be my fault," she said softly. She reached out with her senses and probed, feeling the familiar touches of her own magic on the figure in the bed. "Yes, it's my fault. Oh, Anders, I'm so sorry!"


"Shouldn't you be apologising to Pounce?" Anders said. "It's not like I've been transformed into an.. extremely well endowed man."


"Well, he doesn't exactly look upset about it," she said.


"Master?" Pounce turned his head to Anders. "Fish?"


Anders blinked. "Now, that's just weird."


"I could probably reverse it," Neria said.


"Without hurting him?"


"Ah... "


"What happens if you don't reverse it?"


She shrugged. "Eventually the transformation should wear off," she said. "You remember - in Orlais I reverted back to human after about a day."


"Yes, and thank goodness you did. So you think the same thing will happen to Pounce?"


"I don't see why not."


Anders shrugged. "Well. I suppose we can let him be human for a day. But we'll have to get him to wear some pants first. I'm not letting him out like that."


"Oh, I don't know..." Neria started.


"If Zevran got a look he'd make you keep him like that forever. I do not want our Commander and that elf having their way with my cat."


Pounce blinked again. He'd picked up the shirt and was rubbing his nose on it. "Smells like master," he purred. 


Neria looked at Anders again. "Right," she said. "Pants."

[Sarah1281]

@Miri: Aw, Pounce was so cute! I'm not entirely sure why Pounce turned into a human, though. Neria sleep-did-something?

[LupusYondergirl]

@Miri: The idea of Sigrun and Zevran taking advantage of poor Pounce has me rolling on the ground.

[Miri1984]

@Lupus it may still happen

ETA: @Sarah - the implication is that Pounce has been learning shapeshifting from Neria - it's not completely obvious but in the universe she spent a LOT of time studying him (one of her forms is his) - and Pounce is a special cat with an affinity for the fade. So he's been hanging out in her dreams. And she was dreaming about shapeshifting.

Modifié par Miri1984, 28 octobre 2010 - 03:34 .