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[Tigress M]

"Everyone has a dark(er) side."

Decisions

He shook his head, trying to clear it and sank down on the bed to keep from falling, his legs growing numb as a shadow passed over his vision.  He couldn’t believe his ears.  

“You want me to do what?!?” Alistair asked, staring up at Aubrianna in horror.  

“It’s the only way,” she said.  

Since you insisted we kill Loghain.  She’d never say that to him, but he knew it for the truth.   

He, on the other hand, had questioned her decisions several times over the past two years.  As if he had a right.  He’d given up leadership of their group from the very beginning but that didn’t stop him from telling her she was wrong every time she made a decision he didn’t agree with.  

He stared into her deep blue eyes, the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen, and shuddered.  He loved her.  But was that enough to venture down such a dark, dangerous path?  Could he live with the repercussions of committing such an act?  The other Wardens would surely ask questions he wasn’t sure he could answer.  And what of this child that would supposedly result from this act?  Could he live with himself for deliberately siring a bastard, knowing all too well the horrors carrying around that label would cost his unborn child? 

Who was he?  How did he get here?  No longer was he the obedient Templar who could clearly see right from wrong, black from white.  At best, he now lived in a world of shadow, not dark but not light, either.  Daily coming to understand more and more why they called them “Grey Wardens”.  

He’d been happy when Aubrianna had refused mercy to Loghain’s men in Lothering, slaughtering them to a man.  He’d turned a blind eye to her obvious delight at playing both sides in Orzammar, fully trusting her, as a Noble, to understand the game of politics better than he ever could.  He’d accepted that the truth sometimes did more damage than a well meaning lie, as in the case of the Dalish husband seeking news of his beloved wife.  

And let’s not forget the darkest act of all, the one that had brought them to this place.  He’d demanded Loghain’s execution, despite the pleas from not only Loghain, but Riordan and Aubrianna.    

But what did that make him?   This man who no longer saw things in stark black and white. 

And just how far would he go?  Once again his mind came back to the question, could he live with himself if he partook of this ritual?  But no, that was not the real question.  The real question was, could he live without her?  And he knew the answer to that.  He could not.  Ever. 

So, he would make the killing blow if Riordan fell before the final confrontation.  And leave her alone, the only remaining Warden in Ferelden, forced to bear a burden she never asked for, by herself?  He loved her too much to condemn her to that fate.  She’d lost enough in her life, he would not let her lose him, too.  

He took a deep breath, gathering his resolve.  “Are you sure this is what you want?” he asked, knowing the answer but needing to hear it from her own lips.  Needing her to make this one last decision.

“Trust me,” she replied, stroking his cheek. 

“I do trust you,” he said, taking her hand in his and bringing it to his lips.  “But it is my love for you that rules my actions and I love you enough to do what you ask.”

Tears coursed down her cheeks.  “Thank you.  I know this cannot be easy for you.”

“It is easier than the alternatives, my love,” he replied, brushing her tears away.  “This may be a dark road we travel down, but at least we’ll walk it together.  Forever.”

[rak72]

I'm at work today, someone just came in with the Alistair hairdo

[Sarah1281]

@Tigress M: Oh, this is so poignant! I love the thought process behind Alistair deciding to do the DR. In the game, if you play the love card then he caves far too easily for my tastes and seeing that he's actually agonizing over the decision is a nice touch.

[Tigress M]

@Sarah - Great response! I came THIS close to choosing Loghain's execution as the "event" and now I'm so glad I didn't because you depicted it, and Alistair's feelings, perfectly! Excellent writing.

[inclemency]

Ms. Lovey Dovey wrote...

rak72 wrote...
I'm at work today, someone just came in with the Alistair hairdo

That would be a crew cut.....which 60% white men carry

That would be boy band hair, not crew cut


@Tigress - That was fantastic, never really gave his viewpoint much thought before, you've made them come to life.  Two great reads so far!

Modifié par inclemency, 20 novembre 2010 - 05:14 .

[RagingCyclone]

Ok, I am taking this as darker not meaning more evil or violent, but sadness. We all feel a little darker when things are not going like we hoped. Our dreams are dashed, and we find ourselves in dispair. For Alistair, the drunken pirate is the dark Alistair. His mentor is dead and killer set free. His one love he feels betrayed by, and so he is lost in dispair and is leading a life he never thought he would have. Instead of the happy warden with the love of his life, he is now the drunken shell of what he once was:

[Tigress M]

@Sarah and inclemency - Thank you both! I've always felt the DR discussion was far too trite and Alistair too easily persuaded. So, this prompt gave me a perfect opportunity to flesh out his thought process regarding this decision. (Thanks sooooo much to Meri for yet another dynamite prompt!)

[Tigress M]

@RC - That is creepy good! I especially like how you've aged him (including the receding hairline), making the image all the more realistic.

[inclemency]

Rage, the idea of a drunken Alistair is one thing, but seeing your possible reality is just epic. Amazing job!

[RagingCyclone]

@Tigress, love it. The thoughts going through his mind at that moment, you captured very well. 

And thanks. I was trying to think of a good look, and in my games there aren't really any dark moments for him. ( I take care of my bro)

@Storm, thanks, and again thanks for help finding that teardrop. I think it adds just the right touch to his sorrow.

Modifié par RagingCyclone, 20 novembre 2010 - 05:29 .

[Lady Jess]

klarabella wrote...

Lady Jess wrote...
I find even if I'm romancing Alistair, I leave his tactics on aggressive. I see him as less...i don't know, worried about ME once Zev is in the party. Zev (who's default tactic is to attack anything that attacks the warden) is basicallly assigned to take care of me while Alistair defends the group as a whole. Thank the maker they get along well. It wouldn't work so well if they got along like him and Morrigan.

Isn't your Warden supposed to be a capable fighter? My Warden doesn't need protection, you don't engage in sword fighting when you don't know what you're doing.

And Zevran's tactics are supposed to make backstabbing more likely, it has nothing to do with protection.

I play mages and rogues. Mages are squishy...yes, they do need protection. Rogues are single target, so again, she's engaged with one, Wynne is healing, Alistair has his own...and an archer is firing from a bush? Zev automatically neutralizes that threat.

[Lady Jess]

Sarah1281 wrote...

klarabella wrote...

Lady Jess wrote...
I find even if I'm romancing Alistair, I leave his tactics on aggressive. I see him as less...i don't know, worried about ME once Zev is in the party. Zev (who's default tactic is to attack anything that attacks the warden) is basicallly assigned to take care of me while Alistair defends the group as a whole. Thank the maker they get along well. It wouldn't work so well if they got along like him and Morrigan.

Isn't your Warden supposed to be a capable fighter? My Warden doesn't need protection, you don't engage in sword fighting when you don't know what you're doing.

And Zevran's tactics are supposed to make backstabbing more likely, it has nothing to do with protection.

...Zevran attacking whatever attacks the Warden is a sign that he wants to kill you instead of trying to protect you? How? 

And no one said that the Warden needed protection but I don't find it unbelievable that people would be inclined to try anyway.

Considering there are only TWO wardens at this time I agree. And one is not in plate but robes, or leathers. It would make sense to have someone watching her back.

[Lady Jess]

klarabella wrote...

Sarah1281 wrote...
 ...Zevran attacking whatever attacks the Warden is a sign that he wants to kill you instead of trying to protect you? How? 

:happy: Oh, I didn't realize backstabbing could be interpreted that way. I meant actual backstabbing for more damage. Enemies who are hitting the main character are more likely to turn their backs to Zevran and the Warden is the only character who is always available and very likely to be controlled by the player.

Sarah1281 wrote...
And no one said that the Warden needed protection but I don't find it unbelievable that people would be inclined to try anyway.

Hm, ist it even possible to protect someone that way while you're engaged in fighting? It's just a standard assumption that always rubbed me the wrong way: Miss Super-awesome with the silver tongue and the quickest blades (or spells) in all of Thedas needs protection.

But that's just me thinking aloud.

Yes it is, soldiers do it all the time.

[nos_astra]

I'm probably too much used to playing a warrior (rogues don't exist in my games), that's why I don't like the notion of a fully capable warrior needing protection from a love interest. It makes her look weak.

I understand that all companions are having each other's backs. Of course, mages and archers would not stand around for the enemy to charge or hurl spells at them, they'd take cover, I suppose.

Edit: Don't mind me, I'm always trying to translate gameplay combat into live action combat. [smilie]../../../images/forum/emoticons/lol.png[/smilie]

Modifié par klarabella, 20 novembre 2010 - 06:31 .

[Zjarcal]

klarabella wrote...

I'm probably too much used to playing a warrior (rogues don't exist in my games), that's why I don't like the notion of a fully capable warrior needing protection from a love interest. It makes her look weak.

I understand that all companions are having each other's backs.Of course, mages and archers would not stand around for the enemy to charge or hurl spells at them, they'd take cover, I suppose.

Properly built rogues don't really need any extra protection. With a sky high defense they're untouchable, even if they were running around naked.

Oh, great prompt entries Sarah and Tigress!

[KnightofPhoenix]

klarabella wrote...

I'm probably too much used to playing a warrior (rogues don't exist in my games), that's why I don't like the notion of a fully capable warrior needing protection from a love interest. It makes her look weak.

Eh, I have no trouble at all imagining Morrigan saving Arcturus' life a couple of times, thanks to mind blast or cone of cold (and a rogue is more untoucheable than a warrior). And I think I am more adamant about image and not looking weak more than anyone (I had someone killed for this afterall)

Modifié par KnightofPhoenix, 20 novembre 2010 - 06:32 .

[bleetman]

"Everyone has a dark(er) side"

"The taint... it's a death sentence. Ultimately your body won't be able to take it. When the time comes, most Grey Wardens go to Orzammar and die in battle rather than... waiting. It's tradition.”

Tradition.  He’d clung to it his entire life, living as others had demanded. The Chantry, the Wardens, the Landsmeet. Where were they now? What comfort did any of this bring?

They’d known it was coming, of course. For thirty years they’d known it was coming, spending the last year afraid to sleep. When the nightmares inevitably started, they’d set out for Orzammar together, as always.  Others had joined them, surprisingly – Wardens from Orlais, some she had recruited in Amaranthine. One even travelled from Antiva for the chance to battle and die alongside the Hero of Ferelden. They’d all fallen, of course, one by one, but that was the idea, he supposed. Nobody was walking out of this alive. It was tradition.

Was it? Was it tradition to see friends and heroes die in battle against an enemy without number? Was it tradition to hold the beaten body of his love as her life ebbed away from gaping wounds? There was no point to this, no comforting reassurance. Fighting the Blight had been one thing. This? This was pointless. Better to die in their homes.


But there was no turning back, of course. Even if he’d figured out the map and could turn around, what would be the point? No matter where he went, the sound of her voice followed. The smell of her hair. Her lifeless eyes staring up at him...

No. This was all he had left. Wandering alone, following their stench, spilling their blood, until it was finally over.

She had been his light. Only darkness remained.



...

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go pay cuteoverload a visit to cheer myself up.

[Edit]: Cleared up the dodgy paragraphing. I blame copy/paste.

Modifié par bleetman, 20 novembre 2010 - 09:41 .

[Lady Jess]

klarabella wrote...

I'm probably too much used to playing a warrior (rogues don't exist in my games), that's why I don't like the notion of a fully capable warrior needing protection from a love interest. It makes her look weak.

I understand that all companions are having each other's backs. Of course, mages and archers would not stand around for the enemy to charge or hurl spells at them, they'd take cover, I suppose.

Edit: Don't mind me, I'm always trying to translate gameplay combat into live action combat. [smilie]../../../images/forum/emoticons/lol.png[/smilie]

Alistair is my love interest most games...he's pretty protective too no?

But Zev in every game has something to prove to everyone, not just his LI but as a friend and  companion. So it's completely in character for him. It wouldn't surprise me to learn that this HAS something to do with his default tactics along side being best for backstabs. The writers are pretty slick that way.

@KoP it's not so much weakness as Zev proving himself loyal, and comeraderie. As for Morrigan...well I can see her being a bit RAWR if someone was messing with her man indeed.

[tuppence95]

@Tigress - Thank you for giving us the words that the scene needed so much!  

@Bleetman - Very well written, but OMG.  *sniffle* 

[KnightofPhoenix]

Lady Jess wrote...

@KoP it's not so much weakness as Zev proving himself loyal, and comeraderie. As for Morrigan...well I can see her being a bit RAWR if someone was messing with her man indeed.

Yea exactly, I don't see it as weakness for comrades to watch each other's backs, or for a leader to be protected by his followers.

[inclemency]

@bleetman - that was heartbreaking, and wonderfully written...made me tear up.  Loved it!

[Sarah1281]

@bleetman:  Just... I can never spend too much time thinking about the Calling and the thought of being the last one left after everything (including your beloved LI) has already been violently killed and knowing that nothing awaits you but the exact same fate no matter what you do is really quite upsetting. Good job with this.

[Tigress M]

I generally play Rogues and I set Alistair to attack whatever attacking me because although my rogues dodge many attacks, if they get overwhelmed or stunned, they can go down pretty quickly. For RP purposes, I do it because that's what he'd do... come after anyone who tried hurting the woman he loves.

But, in my most recent playthrough, I'm playing a Warrior and I purposely changed my tactics so Ali doesn't come running to help since I'm perfectly capable of taking care of my warden without assistance (for the most part lol). It's actually felt kind of odd... lonely if you will, NOT having Alistair rushing to my side all the time, but... this playthrough has been great fun, so far.

@bleetman - Ouch. That was very touching.