What if Alistair had met Duncan in the fade?
By: Me.
WARNING: Some Dwarven cussin, and violence all due to Bob having a bad day.
Happy.
That is what Alistair felt right at this moment and by the
Maker it was a good feeling. Duncan and the others where here in front of him,
talking, laughing, and just being a family. A general sense of rightness had
washed over him, and for once he could relax in what felt like ages.
There was something bothering him though, almost a feeling
of having to do something, but he soon shrugged it off and started listening to
Felix tell them another off-colour tale.
All in all being here made him feel very good, and a desire for
this moment to never end was growing in him. Suddenly Felix stopped talking and
looked over Alistair’s shoulder with a mixture between surprise and worry
crossing his face.
“Friend of yours?” Felix asked him.
Turning around Alistair saw a dwarf with close cut blond
hair enter the room, wearing armour with the Warden’s insignia on the front.
“Oh its... Bob!”Alistair said, today just kept getting
better.
“Felix here was just telling us about how he killed a dozen
bandits last year in Orlais Bob care to join us?” Alistair enquired of him.
Putting his face in his hands and letting out a long sigh
Bob looked up at Alistair.
“Listen Salroka I know you are having a good time and all
and wont believe me but-“ Bob started to say.
“Please Bob take a seat, you have no need to stand amongst
us” Duncan said.
“Oh I think I do” Bob replied.
“Ok listen” Bob said in a serious voice, looking straight at
Alistair.
“He is a demon” Bob said pointing to Duncan, “and those two
are demons, and we are in the Fade because a demon trapped us here while we
were trying to save the Mages Tower” Bob said.
“Also that is a very strange statue” he continued looking at
a statue that was up against a wall.
“WHAT?” Alistair said in shock, “that is a little hard to
believe” he continued.
“Why just look at it I mean- oh you mean about the fade and
Duncan being a demon” Bob said coming to a realization.
“Ha” Duncan chortled “that is quite the joke my friend but
Alistair is not going to fall for it” he said obviously brushing it off.
Watching Bob’s face Alistair saw a very subtle shift in it,
yet one that worried him.
“LISTEN YOU SODDING DEMON!” Bob yelled at him.
“I HAVE BEEN LIT ON FIRE, TURNED INTO A MOUSE, A GOLEM, A
MAN ON FIRE, AN UNDEAD, GOTTEN LOST, GOTTEN BEAT ON BY MORE GOLEMS, AND
WANDERED AROUND LISTENING TO PEOPLE’S INNER STRUGGLES AND OR DESIRES ALL
SODDING DAY!” Bob hollered getting very angry.
“If you think YOU are going to stop me you have got issues
upstairs demon” Bob finished in final tone.
While Alistair was taken back by his short friends rant what
happened next was even more worrying. Duncan and the three other wardens got up
from the tale and without a word they approached Bob and looked down at him.
“Foolish child I offer you peace and happiness and you throw
it away” Duncan said.
“I’ll give you some peace and happiness demon!” Bob threw
back at him, then drew both his swords in a flash and set himself to fight.
With a snarl the other wardens drew their weapons and
charged the irate dwarf all except for Duncan who stayed back. Getting out of
his chair Alistair had no idea what to do, except to draw his weapon and watch
his friends butcher each other.
Sadly for the demons that closed on him Bob was quite
capable of holding his own.
Ducking one blow and letting the demon stumble past, Bob
reversed his blade and slammed it into the back of one demon and killed it,
then waited for the other two after he tore his sword back out. The next demon
came more carefully and tried to engage Bob in a fight and hold his attention.
Coming from the other side the last demon rushed him looking
for an opening, yet found none. If Alistair was not there he would never have
believed that someone could almost effortlessly hold off two attackers at the
same time, yet Bob was doing just that.
With a quick faint Bob cut the leg of one demon causing it
to hit the floor, leaving only one demon standing. It tried its best but Bob only ducked its
clumsy blows and shoved both his swords into its guts killing it. Removing his
blades from the demon, Bob stomped the wounded demons neck, and with a twist of
his foot ended its struggles.
“Impressive” Duncan said, “ however you escape attempt is
now over” he said drawing his sword.
“Oh by the stone if I had a sovereign every time a demon has
said that today” Bob groaned.
Reacting quickly Alistair plunged his blade into Dunca- no
the demon’s back with all his force.
What came from the demon’s mouth was an ugly scream that
quickly died off.
“Took you long enough to help o salroka” Bob said relaxing
and wiping the sweat off his forehead.
“Yes well try not to tell anyone else that I was momentarily
struck dumb will you?” Alistair said.
“I shall do my best to keep this secret salroka” Bob said in
an amused tone of voice.
“WAIT where are you going hey!” with that Alistair faded
from view, not however before hearing Bob scream: ARGH! WHY YOU MOTHERLESS DUST
LOVING, NUG HUMPING SODDING DEMON!