1615 réponses à ce sujet

[Calla S]

Schuback wrote...

Take a sticky tape, stick it on his chest, then tear it out very quickly!!

But but... you can't tear out a man's life source like that. It's just cruel.

Modifié par Calla S, 12 août 2010 - 05:08 .

[Saibh]

Dave of Canada wrote...

Saibh wrote...
You make it sound like he owns a van and a trenchcoat.

What would be the problem then? Can't a man own a van, a trenchcoat and like dwarves?

Unfortunate implications, ahoy!

(I don't mean it, I don't mean it, masters, I jest, I jest!)

[Cyanide Disaster]

I'm just saying it now, YAY FOR DWARF LOVE!



The stout folk need to get some too, ya'know.

[Dave of Canada]

Saibh wrote...

Dave of Canada wrote...

Saibh wrote...
You make it sound like he owns a van and a trenchcoat.

What would be the problem then? Can't a man own a van, a trenchcoat and like dwarves?

Unfortunate implications, ahoy!

(I don't mean it, I don't mean it, masters, I jest, I jest!)

Free candy is perfectly acceptable and there's no implicat-

wait.

[namedforthemoon]

I haven't read through the entire thread yet, but let me just say this:



Varric is drop-dead sexy, dwarf or not. I want to boink his brains out.



And P.S., Johnny Depp for his voice acting!! Or someone like JD, please? Please? Meow?

[Enshaid]

namedforthemoon wrote...
Johnny Depp for his voice acting!! Or someone like JD, please? Please? Meow?

 mmmmm pirate butt love anyone?

[Saibh]

namedforthemoon wrote...

I haven't read through the entire thread yet, but let me just say this:

Varric is drop-dead sexy, dwarf or not. I want to boink his brains out.

And P.S., Johnny Depp for his voice acting!! Or someone like JD, please? Please? Meow?

I only like a few of Johnny Depp's roles, and I've grown sick of his quuuuirrrky antics!

Modifié par Saibh, 12 août 2010 - 06:19 .

[Gaxhung]

I don't understand this infatuation with Verric, from the first time I saw him, I had wanted to beat that smirk off his rape face.

[Saibh]

Gaxhung wrote...

I don't understand this infatuation with Verric, from the first time I saw him, I had wanted to beat that smirk off his rape face.

If I had any reason to like him, it's because I have a strong, strong feeling I'm going to dislike Cassandra, and he's going to make her life miserable.

[Enshaid]

Saibh wrote...

namedforthemoon wrote...

I haven't read through the entire thread yet, but let me just say this:

Varric is drop-dead sexy, dwarf or not. I want to boink his brains out.

And P.S., Johnny Depp for his voice acting!! Or someone like JD, please? Please? Meow?

NO spelt Y-E-S...

[TheMadCat]

Hmm, Varric has met Hawke correct? Any chance for the option to smash his face Shepard style when we come to that encounter, if not I demand it be implemented.

[ImoenBaby]

namedforthemoon wrote...

I haven't read through the entire thread yet, but let me just say this:

Varric is drop-dead sexy, dwarf or not. I want to boink his brains out.

As someone who *has* read this entire thread, I can tell you this:

It doesn't matter. You're all blind.

I admit it: when it comes to sexual preference, I discriminate against dwarfs. As in outright rejection of the chunky/stubby densely-packed broad smallness. No, I don't find pint-sized humanoid boulders hawt...as much as I try to confront and combat this ingrained prejudice. Which is to say not at all. 


/ducks

[BrandonMotz]

No way! this guy needs a beard!

[Enshaid]

namedforthemoon wrote...




/ducks

*rears back to throw second bottle*

[Dave of Canada]

ImoenBaby wrote...

namedforthemoon wrote...

I haven't read through the entire thread yet, but let me just say this:

Varric is drop-dead sexy, dwarf or not. I want to boink his brains out.

As someone who *has* read this entire thread, I can tell you this:

It doesn't matter. You're all blind.

I admit it: when it comes to sexual preference, I discriminate against dwarfs. As in outright rejection of the chunky/stubby densely-packed broad smallness. No, I don't find pint-sized humanoid boulders hawt...as much as I try to confront and combat this ingrained prejudice. Which is to say not at all. 


/ducks

Leave...

Leave now.

[Daur]

I would still prefer Oghren

[ImoenBaby]

Dave of Canada wrote...


Leave...

Leave now.

*Chuckles, notices Dave's portrait.*

Mea culpa! Have an ale, on me - have fifteen! 

Hey, if I have some too, will the beer goggles make dwarves hawt? Would need more than fifteen though.

/RUNS

[Dave of Canada]

ImoenBaby wrote...


*Chuckles, notices Dave's portrait.*

Mea culpa! Have an ale, on me - have fifteen! 

Hey, if I have some too, will the beer goggles make dwarves hawt? Would need more than fifteen though.

/RUNS

Let's test it out, see how many are required.

[thegreateski]

If it works - you find Dwarfs hot.



If it fails - You get alcohol poisoning.



Everybody wins.

[Fangirl17]

*reads all of the devs comments* Hahahaha,you guys are awesome. After reading a few pages of this thread Im very interested in Varric.He hasnt won my heart quite yet though.I wonder if he'll make an appearance in the trailer ;3

[Gaxhung]

Saibh wrote...

Gaxhung wrote...

I don't understand this infatuation with Verric, from the first time I saw him, I had wanted to beat that smirk off his rape face.

If I had any reason to like him, it's because I have a strong, strong feeling I'm going to dislike Cassandra, and he's going to make her life miserable.

AH, a few hours of procrastination, finally I know who Cassandra is -- some Chantry sl*t, any way, two wrongs don't make a right!

[joriandrake]

Mary Kirby wrote...

Sheryl Chee wrote...

Anarya wrote...
This thread is like a writer magnet I swear.

It's about Varric. No one can resist the call of the manly man-hair.

Edit: Ninja'd by Apollo.

All the female writers seem to like swooning (or at least pretending to swoon) over Varric. I think David and Luke might be immune to his charms, somehow. I assume they have some sort of pact with a demon to accomplish that.

David is a racist, or just doesn't like competition

[KLUME777]

Oh boy, im picturing those awkward love scenes in my head, except this time its Ogrhen instead of Alistair...

[What?]

Below is Varric's interrogation scene in the DA2 trailer, as shown through transcript.



[Cassandra]  Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Varric
                          Looking so down in the dumps
                          Every guy here'd love to be you, Varric
                          Even when taking your lumps
                          There's no man in Kirkwall as admired as you
                          You're everyone's favorite guy!
                          Everyone's awed and inspired by you
                          And it's not very hard to see whyyyyyy....

                          Nooooooo oooooone's....
                          Slick as Varric
                          No one's quick as Varric
                          No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Varric's!
                          For there's no man in Kirkwall as manly
                          Perfect, a pure paragon!
                          You can ask any Elf, Hawke, or Bethany
                          And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be oooonnnnnnn

[Chorus]           Nooooooo ooooooone's
                           Been like Varric
                          A kingpin like Varric

[Cassandra]   No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Varric!

[Varric]           As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidaaaating

[Chorus]         My what a Dwarf,  that Varric!

[Cassandra]  Give five hurrahs!
                         Give twelve hip-hips!
                         Varric is the best
                         And the rest is all drips!

[Chorus]        Nooooo ooooone...
                         Fights like Varric
                         Douses lights like Varric
                         In a wrestling match nobody bites like Varric!

[Fangirl]          For there's no one as burly and brawny

[Varric]           As you see, I've got biceps to spaaare

[Cassandra]  Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny

[Varric]          That's right! And every last inch of me's covered in haaair.

[Chorus]        Noooooo oooooone..
                        Hits like Varric
                        Matches wits like Varric
                        In a spitting match nobody spits like Varric

[Varric]           I'm especially good at expectoooraaaating.

[Chorus]        Ten points for Varric!

[Varric]         When I was a lad, I ate four dozen nugs
                       Every morning to help me get laaarge
                       And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen nugs
                       So I'm roughly the size of a baaaaaaaaarge!

[Chorus]      Noooo ooooone...
                      Stabs like Varric
                      Makes those beauts like Varric

[Cassandra] Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Varric!

[Varric]          I use antlers in all of my deeeecooooraaaating


[Chorus]       My what a Dwarf, that Varric!

Modifié par VictorianTrash, 12 août 2010 - 12:36 .

[Merllle]

David Gaider wrote...

They are short, stocky and hairy.

And female dwarves often look like 14 year-old girls.

That said, I wouldn't mind someday writing a dwarf-dwarf romance (which was what I originally said), but otherwise? I stand by my ewww.

Uau!! That male was the description of my father! And then, the female... Me.

... I always knew I was a dwarf. I'm not sure I either should run away crying or pose victoriously.

The Dwarf Noble Origins was my favorite by far in DA:O, though - I was a little biased towards dwarves, and the first time I looked at Gorim, my instinct was "No. Nono. Ew." And then, throughout the Origin I had a progressive change of heart. Ultimately the "I will always love you, my lady." broke my heart for good. It's true, I was playing a preety Lady Aeducan, which means we were both dwarves, but, as a player, I had a change of heart. And that's half a step to let your chararacter do something similar. What I learned from Gorim was that if the character is incredible enough, its race won't matter so much as it'll end up being attractive, despite the massive ammounts of beard of awesome (that some women do seem to appreciate...) or the shortness and stockyness.

I think I had a great deal to talk about female dwarves, but I'm completely biased towards them, so I'll probably just end up souding stupid. Let's just say - I like them! x) Small, fiery woman are amazing!

@VictorianTrash, you got me laughing out loud at that! Ever since I was a child, I've joked with that song so much! It's the epitome of the macho!!

Modifié par Merllle, 12 août 2010 - 12:22 .