aimo_ahmed wrote...
Link to the full animated GIF. OBVIOUSLY NSFW, DUH.
Thanks to the supportive viewers on livestream. It's fun to draw for y'all even though I'm half dead from tiredness
ONOEZ MY VIRGIN EYEZ...
thankyou aimo and happy new year!
Varric Tethras: Chest Hair & Dwarven Goodness 2.0 **Finest Dwarven Craft**
Débuté par
GameBoyish
, août 16 2010 11:29
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#12851
Posté 03 février 2011 - 01:54
GameBoyish
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ONOEZ MY VIRGIN EYEZ...
thankyou aimo and happy new year!
Retour en haut
#12852
Posté 03 février 2011 - 07:22
Starflower2525
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- 119 messages
aimo_ahmed wrote...
Just making good on my lofty threat; No demo on Feb 1st, then Varric Tethras Stripperama Spectacular it is!
Link to the full animated GIF. OBVIOUSLY NSFW, DUH.
Thanks to the supportive viewers on livestream. It's fun to draw for y'all even though I'm half dead from tiredness
Cool GIF. This has made my morning
#12853
Posté 03 février 2011 - 09:28
Dave of Canada
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EDIT: COLORS AREN'T WORKING PROPERLY, ARGH.
Uber long, complete Legend of Varric post.
Very long post incoming, I lost my drive halfway through so excuse me if the ending seems rushed and sorry if something isn't explained properly. I've been doing this in one sitting and my mind is melting. I'll answer any questions, though.
LEGEND OF VARRIC
FULL PLOT
ACT 1
Legend of Varric starts with a narration that explains the unfortunate fate of the Warden and his warden companion, having built up an army they failed miserably during the final siege on Denerim and it wiped out Ferelden's last defense. The Blight remains unchecked, the nations are scrambling and refugees are fleeing everywhere.
Though none of that matters, Varric is heading to the local inn in Kirkwall to relax! Rain falls from the sky (zomg foreshadowing) and a beggar is asking for money, though nobody really cares about the beggars in games because what are the chances they'd give you something of use aside from boring information that you'd probably be able to get elsewhere?
Oh well, who cares. Varric walks into the bar and finds it almost filled with many different personalities, each of them having their own little joke like a forgetful mother talking to her frustrated son, but none of it matters and to continue the game you're forced to take a seat at the other side of the counter to drink some Montsimmard Red with your name on it.
Drinking isn't that great thing to do when you're a protagonist of a game, though. It often leads to troublesome events! Anyways, let's ignore that friendly advice and say that Varric didn't listen. Drunk and angry with a local guard, they enter a brawl where Varric reveals his chest hair and it melts the guard's face off. "End of line", a powerful voice in the distance yells and a magical hammer flies toward Varric.
Waking up in a dark room sitting on a stone throne (MORE STONE FOR THE STONE THRONE, MORE WINE FOR THE WINE GOD /obscurereference), Varric finds himself in a trial against the Maker and Stanley Woo who gives him a choice:
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Be permabanned.
By accepting to be permabanned, Varric finds himself apologizing to the player for not giving him much of a game and he's banished into a fate of permabanation. The game ends, the game over screen appears and the game goes back to the menu.
Stop the Blight.
By agreeing to stop the Blight, Varric is sent to an island called Hannen off the shore of Ferelden. It's such a secluded area that nobody on Ferelden knows of it's existance (that or it might be a horrible way to introduce new landmass in a universe that already exists!). You're told to find your own travel into Ferelden proper. Game continues below. VVV
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Hannen Village (the villagers suffer from not being creative, so the village is named after the island) is filled with refugees, guards prevent people from going into the market and you're trapped in the starting area alone. Talking to refugees just leads to a lot of QQing, speaking to the guards might get you killed and speaking to the merchant allows you to buy stuff but you probably don't have money because you haven't killed anything yet (what's the deal with everything holding money? IDK)
If you enter the inn, you'd find it filled with more refugees and the same innkeeper from Kirkwall who admit that since the destruction of all the inns in Ferelden because of the Blight he started a new business in Ferelden and is making a killing from it. He turns into a recurring character, all inns in the game have him as an innkeeper.
The innkeeper sends you to Sebastian (Companion! Look at the end of this "summary" for information on them) who needs help with a task, he promises to get you into Ferelden if you help him. You can refuse the task but you're unable to move the game foward without accepting, so be a (wo)man and accept already! ... accepted yet? Okay.
He needs help with a tower north of Hannen, so Varric leaves town and walks to the tower with Sebastian in tow. Once at the tower, Varric explains to you that he's an apostate and so is his daughter. He explains that they live in this tower where barely anybody shows up because they think it's haunted, but due to the tower's abandoned and old nature it started collapsing and Sebastian was unable to reach his daughter and hired help to rebuild.
Too bad they were too scared and ran away (actually it was a murder plot and the guy pulled the men out to conceal the evidence, too long of a sidequest to explain with how tired I am of writing) leaving Varric the crew's only responsibility. After finding some rope, the tools and some planks you're able to move foward deeper into the tower where Sebastian's daughter is.
Oh no! The room is abandoned and it looks like nobody has been there! You and Sebastian can sleep in her bed, you can look around for stuff but there's nothing and the only way to continue is up! *points* Go on, go!
At the top of the tower, Sebastian's daughter is there and she talks to her father a while before noticing Varric and interrupting her father to ask who he is and why she can't see him properly. Something is amiss, she wants Varric to come closer and Varric refuses saying he doesn't listen to suggestive orders by creepy women. She pushes her father aside, orders Varric to come (and her model starts changing to another look) and surprise! She's actually an abomination, taken over by a desire demon!
After killing her, Sebastian cries with his daughter's dying corpse in her arms and she admits that she took the demon in because she was lonely and needed company. The demon takes over her for a few more seconds, she says that Varric is the destined "Destroyer" before her host dies. Sebastian keeps crying over his deceased daughter's corpse and you can soothe him or just tell him you'll meet at the bottom of the tower.
Either way, Sebastian notices something in the distance and Varric turns around to check out what what it is. Smoke is coming from Hannen, what does this mean? Who cares! We're going to find out soon enough! Upon approaching Hannen, the overworld icon has been replaced with burned down buildings and the entire north quarter is on fire.
Upon entering Hannen again, you find corpses littering the floor and some rioters start attacking you. "What's going on?" Sebastian asks, though how the hell should you know? You weren't there either! With the guards (and refugees) gone, you can heard into the trade district and find the rioters destroying everything and fighting the guards and citizens of Hannen.
The Captain of the Guard (named Johnathan) approaches you and notices Sebastian, they talk for a while and they explain the scenario. You're told that the Bann has been taking refugees in the cover of night and this angered the refugees greatly, the guards tried to keep the situation under control but a riot started anyways and now the guards are trying to simply protect their village from the angered rioters.
Sebastian says that as much as he promised you for a path into Ferelden, he has to make sure his home is safe and asks you to help. If you refuse now, he leaves on his own to the manor while if you accept he stays with you. Either way, you're forced to stop the riots in a but-thou-must moment because you have no way to leave Hannen. Sebastian joins you back near the manor if you refused to help him.
Sebastian says he knows the manor like the back of his hand, shows you a secret passage that leads you into the estate's dungeon and you have to fight a bunch of manor guards that think you're rioters. In a prison cell, you find Learni (the thief who tried to steal from you earlier, another companion who's story can be found after this "summary") who begs you to get her out or she's "next". She explains that the Bann are taking people for a sort of ritual, you don't know what but it can't be good if the people don't return. Right?
Now you're given a bunch of options to go through the manor, you either fight through it completely / you sneak through it or you pretend your servants until you reach the end. I personally loved being servants, as I had more fun writing the dialogue in that scenario where the guards ask when the hell they got a dwarf servant.
Either way you got through the mansion, you'd find yourselves at a game show at the end of the mansion where you're asked a lot of things and stupid references happen if you lose. For example, A Wicker Man reference if they "unleash" the bees.
Either way, if you're good and answer all the questions correctly or just fail miserably and deal with the punishments (most likely monster attacks or -HP things), you'll reach the Bann's room and find out that the ritual he's doing is... blood magic, Sebastian calls him a hypocrite (part of his backstory) and the Bann turns out to reveal that the blood magic is sustaining his daughter's life (though she's in a coma), Sebastian is shocked to see the Bann's daughter alive and (is implied) to fall on his knees.
The Captain of the Guard shows up (saying he followed you), sees the ritual and calls the Bann a monster and says he'll be punished for everything he did. The Bann says that the town is nothing without him, he's all that's holding it together.
... Sebastian doesn't know who to side with, he says that the Bann did horrible things to him years ago but he doesn't know how he feels condemning the woman (who he says is his wife) to death while Laerni wants the Bann dead.
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SIDE WITH JOHNATHAN, CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD
The Bann casts blood magic and takes over John, you're forced to fight both of them. After the boss fight, John snaps out of it and "wakes" up. The Bann struggles a while, blood starts spilling out and he calls out his daughter's name before the ritual ends and she dies. He looks at Sebastian, says that he's responsible for this and dies.
The Captain of the Guard decides that now with the Bann dead, the riots should probably cease when he delivers the news to the refugees. He thanks you for all your help, Sebastian goes to see his wife's corpse and wonders if she even wanted this.
EPILOGUE:
After you beat the game, you'd find out that while the riots did cease and the refugees were relieved, it cost Hannen greatly. Without it's Bann that kept refugees outside the city, refugees flooded the town and began to take a lot of resources. This eventually led to many of Hannen's residents moving away, so when all the refugees had finally crossed the ocean out of Ferelden the town was unable to sustain itself and Hannen's community died.
SIDE WITH THE BANN
Sebastian is surprised, Laerni is disgusted but decides to trust you. John looks at you in surprise, saying that you're endorsing this kind of ritual and says that he should never have trusted you. He throws his sword and manages to hurt the Bann greatly, he calls for guards and the room floods with them. Boss fight!
After you finish defeating waves of guards, you fight John himself. Compared to the Bann though, he's a pushover and he dies calling Varric a monster. Sebastian heals the Bann after the battle, the Bann shakes Sebastian's hand and appreciates what he did today. Learni leaves the room, disgusted with what you've done.
Sebastian walks up to his wife, he kisses her and apologizes for everything. He questions himself if she even wants to be sustained this way, which the Bann replies that it didn't matter and his daughter is all he cares about. The Bann says that he now has to deal with these riots and bring them in with force.
EPILOGUE:
After you beat the game, you'd find out that the riots were shut down with violence. Eventually, refugees began to avoid Hannen Island while fleeing Ferelden and the village soon fell back into obscurity. Many of Hannen's residents would express approval and the community remained as it always has. Though rumors of the Bann's secret were often spread around town, they'd fall silent soon afterward.
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Note: The above choice will change some interaction with Laerni and Sebastian:
Sebastian will feel guilty of his wife's murder (if you sided with John)
Laerni will be grateful and say the Bann had it coming (if you sided with John)
Sebastian will be wondering if leaving his wife to... "that" fate is worse than death (if you sided with the Bann)
Laerni will say that he should've died, that he killed a lot of people and she was supposed to be one of them (if you sided with the Bann)
Either way, Sebastian decides that he's sick of Hannen and wants to get off it with you. He pledges himself your cause and Laerni decides to do so too (even if you sided with the Bann), Sebastian says he'll wait at the port south of town. You can roam around Hannen, talk with the citizens and find out how they feel about your choice.
When you're sick of people going "yay" or "nay", go to the harbor and the screen fades to black.
END ACT 1
Intermission:
Two hooded figures (one sitting in a throne) are in a dark chamber are talking, the leader asks where "she" is and appears angry at something. Suddenly doors open and a woman being followed by two hurlocks approaches the center the of the room, it's revealed who these people are: David Gaider is the hooded leader, the other figure is Sheryl Chee and the woman that they were waiting for is Mary Kirby.
They confront Mary, asking how her creation (Varric) is loose on Thedas. She says she doesn't know, though Gaider doesn't buy it and orders the hurlocks to carry her away. She struggles but she's dragged out of the room. Sheryl asks if Gaider has any plans to stop Varric, he shakes his head and decides that Sheryl should deal with it.
Sheryl laughs, saying it'll be fun to take down Mary's creation and teleports away. Gaider sits on his throne contemplating about his next course of action.
ACT 2
Varric, Sebastian and Laerni get off the boat talking about a lot of things that happened onboard that you didn't get to see. Darn, that could've been fun. Oh well! Welcome to the Ferelden Remnants camp, a camp of those remain behind to try and take their country back no matter how doomed it is.
Since most important players could die during Origins, the only person here that you could probably recognize is Queen Anora who is holding council with a few guards when you first approach her. When questioned why she hasn't fled Ferelden yet, she says it's because the game needed a familiar face no matter how much it doesn't make sense.
After doing some errands to help the camp (mostly clearing vermin, helping a few outposts and stuff) you come back in to a dark scene, everybody is dead except for one guard who warns to run to the Queen. Near the Queen is Sheryl Chee, dancing around on the table infront of Anora waiting for Varric. When Varric approaches, she kills him with a magic bolt but then frowns with disappointment saying it was too easy.
A quick revival of Varric, she summons forth a revived Duncan and banishes Varric and company into his beard to live out the rest of their (short) lives. Welcome to the Duncan's Beard dungeon, probably one of the weirdest and most fun concepts I had to explore with the game.
As you progress through the dungeon fighting the Fleaspawn, you'll find small communities inside his beard (filled with beard dwelling gnomes). The gnomes often make beard jokes so hopefully you wouldn't get tired of them.
Though the problem with this dungeon, the gimmick as some might say, is that Duncan is a very bored individual and will do many things that will impact the dungeon in odd ways.
After traveling through 1/4 of the dungeon, a cutcene would show of Duncan deciding that he wants to shave and pieces of the dungeon start falling away. Razors would pass from time to time during scripted scenes and kill giant groups of Fleaspawn.
After finishing 2/4 of the dungeon, Duncan decides to try and barbaque but his beard catches fire and not the dungeon is filled with fire and you have to avoid it or get hurt. The fire moves around randomly, standing in it will reduce your health extremely quickly. Now you're capable of fighting flaming fleaspawn! Fire resistant gear is nice here.
After another 3/4 of the dungeon, Duncan wants to take a bath and goes swimming in the ocean. The beard is now flooded and wet fleaspawn will start attacking you, though they are easily dealt with if you use lightning attacks.
At the very end of the dungeon, you find the Archbeetle and slay it. Upon doing so, you grow to full size and escape the dungeon. You can yell at Duncan a lot afterward, though he joins you anyways. Now you can swap party members, wooo!
The camp's survivors gather around Queen Anora and they want to attack Sheryl, though they are unable to do so because of how higher level her guards are. Queen Anora is pleased to see you alive, she explains to you that since Sheryl used too much magic to send you into Duncan's beard she's weakened and her palace is exposed.
After many discussions where the guards at the camp decide that they'll distract the higher level guards at the palace to get a small crew in, you are given free reigns to move everywhere again. Wonderful, isn't it? When you're ready to go to Sheryl Chee's palace, there's a portal to the north of town that will take the crew there (where the guards are waiting).
Done? Alright! Sheryl Chee's palace is found in the Writer's Realm, a realm of unstable energy and the entire castle suffers for it. When the guards distract the giant monster guards, you sneak in. The castle has no distinct theme, half of it has different panels and switches everywhere can change the tempature of the castle from boiling hot to freezing cold.
After manipulating the tempature, fighting a lot of darkspawn minions and strange creatures that shouldn't exist you'll find Sheryl's throne room where she sits there petting a nug. After drinking from her chalice of tears, she throws it aside and a battle starts between Sheryl and Varric (+company).
Once defeated, Sheryl says that Gaider won't let this stand and that Varric won't stop what they set in motion. A choice appears for five seconds, though it's pointless because zombie kittens appear and Sheryl yells out Mary's name before the kittens devour her. The kittens look at Varric but burst into flames instead of attacking, when the party members wonder what happened Varric realizes he let his shirt unbuttoned.
Varric leaves the Writer's Realm and is greeted by the cheers of guards and Queen Anora, Varric raises his brow and is confused. Anora points in the distance and a formly blighted land has been cured, they assumed it was something Varric and company did. Varric looks at the forest and wonders what it means before the screen fades to black.
END ACT 2.
Intermission:
Gaider has Mary dragged infront of him, he tells her that Sheryl has failed in stopping Varric. Mary doesn't appear shocked and says if Gaider needs help in controlling the situation, Gaider says that he has everything under control has sent Lukas & Jennifer to deal with it. Mary says it won't work, Gaider's eyes glow red for a second and says that it'll work and they haven't worked this hard on the Blight for it to fail now.
Mary is carried away again and Gaider apologizes to Sheryl, saying that "the one" will bring her back.
ACT 3
Act 3 comes back into the Ferelden Remnants Camp where everybody is drunk, including Varric, after celebrating the unblightness of the land. After much discussing, they decide that Varric is their best hope of stopping the Blight and he has to do everything because he's the protagonist. Varric and companions stop celebrating as the guards drink themselves silly, Varric leaves the celebrating behind and pouts at the other side of the camp.
Here a vision of Redcliffe castle appears before him, he doesn't know if it's the alcohol or something he ate but a voice tells him that Redcliffe holds the secret to stopping the Blight. After the vision ends, Varric turns around to notice the other companions have also noticed it. They decide that they can't fight fate and set off toward Redcliffe, much to the chagrin of Varric and the celebration of the guards.
Lots of traveling, passing by Orzammar where the dwarves sealed the gate and won't let you in unless you know the secret knock and seeing unusual sights like the Fellowship of the Sock. Though there's a few serious sights, like you'd meet Lisa (optional companion) if you entered the camp near Redcliffe (she's protecting some people fleeing north, she attacks you if you have either Sebastian / Laerni in the party and that's extremely likely. She stops attacking after two turns anyway.)
Once you arrive to Redcliffe, you find lots of dead darkspawn. That's a good sign, right? When you enter Redcliffe castle, you'd enter a lobby with lots of locked doors. Welcome to Redcliffe Castle dungeon! Wooooo!
As you'd walk through the castle, you'd be attacked by ghosts and zombies as you go through it. Outside of combat, some doors disappear after you go through them, some hallways suddenly close off, some statues move around with you, you see some butlers and stuff but they are always out of your reach and they disappear when you get too close. SelphieSK did a lot of work on Redcliffe castle, I changed a few things but she did an amazing job on it. So props to her!
After dealing with the hauntings, fighting through the undead and reaching the end you'll find Lukas and Jennifer. They sent you the vision, hoping you'd fall for their trap and -you- did. Boss fight, stuff happens but Lukas writes himself away before you finish him off. Jennifer tries to do the same but her pen is out of ink, so she's slain.
Varric leaves Redcliffe and notices that the land around it is cured, he thinks the writers are tied to the Blight and the way he can stop it and cure the land is by slaying every single one of them. The companions argue over this, saying that without the writers the world wouldn't exist. Varric shrugs it off and says they'll have to deal with that when it happens.
Some darkspawn attack the surrounding settlements but it's optional if you want to save them or not, it just gets you a few items and the possibility of recruiting the templar from before. If you save them or not, your next objective looms in the distance... the Lukas Tower, a repurposed Circle Tower.
Unfortunately the path is surrounded by darkspawn and you're given two paths: Do you fight through the Darkspawn, reach a boat on the other side and use it to go to the tower or do you fly there on the back of a gryphon?
Fighting the darkspawn is quite easy because it's simply killing darkspawn until you reach the tower.
The gryphon is more complicated because you have to collect the fossils and revive it, the fossils are found in caves to the south of Redcliffe ("medium bosses" defend each bone) and the revival spell is easily down by going to camp and asking Sebastian to do it.
Once you reach the tower itself, it's one large trek of door switch puzzles (that I don't wish to explain since I'm getting -really- tired of writing now). The end of the tower has Lukas surrounded by Pride Demons, you fight them and eventually Lukas - as he's about to write himself away after the end of the battle the papers suddenly disappear and Lukas realizes what happened but dies before he can say anything.
The tower begins to collapse, you have ten minutes (outside of combat) to escape or it's game over. The darkspawn in the tower don't know what to do and mostly get crushed by falling debris, debris is scripted though so you can't get hit. This is mostly to test out your memory on the door puzzles.
After escaping the tower and realizing the boat / gryphon has left, Varric opens his shirt and the chest hair absorbs the lake water and you keep running through the lake bed until the tower explodes. Fade to black.
END ACT 3.
Intermission:
Gaider is getting desperate, he's swearing under his breath as the writing team is falling apart. He orders the Hurlocks to bring Mary to the throne room as he drinks from his Mug of Tears. He turns around and tells Tonia to gather the other writers and leave back to the real world, that he and Mary will finish Varric off.
Mary enters the room as Tonia leaves, Gaider tells her about the deaths of Jennifer and Lukas and how the Blight is disappearing. Mary nods and Gaider says he knows that Mary cares about her creation and has been protecting him, he says that the "Dark Lord Laidlaw" wouldn't approve.
The scene ends with Gaider saying that Laidlaw will be summoned in this world soon and nothing Varric or Mary does will stop them, darkness surrounds him and he laughs as Mary shrieks.
FINAL ACT
Varric wakes up in a cell, his companions surrounding him in different cells and a strange creature walking around laughing at all of them. When questioned, the creature says that he's not allowed to talk to the "Destroyer". You're then asked to make one of the companions you recruited talk to / deal with the creature instead.
Sebastian will ask the creature what it's purpose is and what it hopes to achieve by keeping them locked here, it says it's higher ups ordered it to do so and when he questions it further it's head explode and all doors open (as they were tied to it's life).
Laerni would act flirty, saying it's such a nice creature and handsome until it approachs the cage and then she'd kill it. The cages open.
Lisa would make it question it's faith in it's higherups, making it rebel against them and open her cell door. Unfortunately, since the doors are tied to it's life, it explodes.
Duncan would make the creature go through the Joining, he'd apologize to it as it fails and dies resulting in the doors opening.
Either way, once you're done with the creature you'll encouter more outside the room and you find out that these things are forum trolls and you're trapped in the Writer's Realm. Who brought you here? Who knows! The team would find a vending machine that happens to sell equipment and beds if you want to restore / rest.
After dealing with all this, you'll have to go through the Writer's Realm and fight all sorts of things like angry posters (actual posters) and forum trolls until you reach the second floor where you'd find haters. There are 6 floors and each represent a different type of community member, from blind fanboys / fangirls to senseless haters.
Once you're done with all of them, you'll find Mary Kirby's room and reading her diary hints to you that she's the one that sent the zombie kittens to eat Sheryl and she's the one who wrote away the papers from Lukas. Once you enter the next room, Mary attacks the group and she's surrounded by darkness. Varric orders the group to not kill Mary because she's his creator and killing her would sever his connection to reality.
You're given a choice in the battle, fighting the darkness (which have a lot more health than Mary) or fight Mary. If you kill Mary, the fight ends and she thanks you for freeing her and fuses with your chest hair (allowing Varric to live in reality without his creator being alive). Kill the darkness on the other hand and Mary is freed, she says she was taken over by her former master.
Freed from the darkness, Mary (who can now be used as a companion) explains to Varric that she was helping him because she fears what the Dark Lord Laidlaw would do when he'd be summoned. She explains that Gaider is trying to finish the summoning ritual, that she wrote Varric to show up at the Writer's Realm because she hopes that her creation can stop Gaider before it's too late. (If Mary dies, Gaider explains it a bit more by mocking him for slaying his creator.)
You leave the room in time to notice Gaider leaving the Writer's Realm, if you chase him then you find yourself at the top of Fort Drakon. Gaider asks who set Varric on this foolish quest to stop the summoning, Varric says he's just trying to stop the Blight by Woo's orders. Surprised by hearing this, Gaider wonders why he didn't tell the QA team about their plan.
Gaider reveals that he's the one that started the Blight, he needed the souls of the dead to open a rift through dimensions to bring the Dark Lord Laidlaw into the world. He laughs at your foolishness and says the ritual is almost done, he just needs a little bit more time.
Note: If Mary is with you, Gaider teases her foolishness and explains that she'll regret it when Laidlaw is summoned.
The Archdemon shows up and challenges Varric and company, though it isn't much of a challenge due to how strong they've bonded or some other JRPG trope where the power of friendship stops the villain quite easily. Gaider turns around to notice that there isn't enough time for the ritual to finish and he's about to be slain, he roars in defiance and finishes the summoning earlier than should be.
The disembodied ghostly head of Laidlaw appears over the rift of souls and cries for release, he demands to Gaider why he was summoned early and Gaider says it's because the summoning was about to finish. (If Mary is there, she gasps when she sees Laidlaw appear)
Laidlaw, furious at how the ritual was interrupted, floats down to Gaider and says that he's using his body as the host. Gaider yells out in agony as they refuse together and make Lord Gaidlaw. A final battle happens between Lord Gaidlaw and Varric.
After the final battle, Gaidlaw stands again and proves that he cannot die because he's a god. Stanley Woo appears and says that the Blight has ended, Gaidlaw is weakened and won't be able to stay in Thedas for long before he disappers. Gaidlaw asks Woo how he knew of the plan if he wasn't informed, Woo says that he read the script. (If Mary is with you, she says she's the one who sent the script to Woo)
Woo turns around to look at Varric, he congratulates Varric for getting this far. Varric, confused by this revelation, looks back at both Gaidlaw and he shrugs. Woo tries to permaban Gaidlaw but finds his powers useless towards him, Gaidlaw laughs.
Woo asks Varric and company to think of a solution, he'll distract Gaidlaw in the meantime. You're given a dialogue of how to deal with the situation, each companion giving their thoughts on it.
Suggestion 1: [GOOD ENDING 1] Brought up by Sebastian, he suggests that with enough strength and magic they'd be able to seal Gaidlaw in the rift again. He states that the rift is weakened though and if there were other events in the near future that involved a lot of death then the rift might rip open and unleash a fully powered Gaidlaw upon the world.
Suggestion 2: ["GOOD" ENDING 2] Brought up my Duncan, they send Gaidlaw into the real world and seal him there, Thedas would be saved the wrath of Gaidlaw forever but the real world would suffer the consequences.
Suggestion 3: [EVIL ENDING] Brought up by Laerni (unless "kind), Varric uses his chest hair to absorb Gaidlaw, becoming one with him. It's unknown what would happen but by the opinions of every companion, it's... a bad thing.
Suggestion 4: [Fail ending] Gaiderlaw is allowed to destroy Thedas.
---
Suggestion 1 ending: Varric approaches Gaidlaw who is ready to finish off Woo and punches him, sending him skyrocketing in the sky into the rift and banishing him there, Woo thanks Varric and they walk off into the sunset (though they fall off the building before the screen fades to black).
It is said in the text epilogue that Ferelden rebuilt slowly after the writers (and by association, the Blight) were defeated and monuments of all the dead were built in a large graveyard south of Denerim. Many look up to the sky and see the rift, not wondering how it'll open but when as they know their problem's solution isn't permanant.
Suggestion 2 ending: Sebastian warps the rift using his magic to change it into a portal to the real world, Varric orders Woo to throw Gaidlaw in and he does so. The portal closes when Gaidlaw enters.
In the text epilogue, similar to ending one, Ferelden built memorials for the dead but they also built a monument for the dead of the real world so that nobody would forget the sacrifice they had to do so Thedas could live without fear.
Suggestion 3: Varric absorbs Gaidlaw with his chest hair, groaning and struggling as the god-man struggles to be absorbed. After being absorbed, Varric laughs and his eyes glow red. Some companions will freak out, asking if Varric is still in control. Varric says he is but some (or all on some circumstance) don't believe him and attack him, one last battle happens between the companions that attack you and Varric with maxed out stats and powerful abilities.
The text epilogue for this one is quite simple, it explains that Varric took over the title of Dark Lord and cowed most of Thedas into his rule. People were never able to tell if this was the actual Varric who had full control of himself, Gaidlaw who ceased control of Varric or a mix of both personalities.
Suggestion 4: Rocks fall, everybody dies except for Gaidlaw who goes on to rebuild Thedas in his image.
---
Anyway you ended the game, the game would skip to another scene after the epilogue (where it showed you all the companion endings / side quest endings and such) where a dwarf was sitting infront of a dozen children who are all listening to his story.
The dwarf says the story is over and asks how it was to the kids, the kids say it doesn't make any sense and it's filled with plot holes and that it's horrible. The dwarf gets mad and is about to say something vulgar when Varric walks in, the kids praise him (or are scared of him depending on the ending).
The original dwarf storyteller, revealed to be Bartrand, tells Varric that he was trying to exaggerate and create a tale to entertain these kids but admits he's not the storyteller of the family. Varric agrees with him, tells him to go prepare for his role in Dragon Age 2 and sits down in the chair looking at the kids saying if they want to hear a real story.
Game ends.
COMPANION LIST
Sebastian was covered in far more detail than the other companions will be here.
Laerni
Learni is introduced early, even before Sebastian, as an elven thief that tries to pickpocket Varric while walking to the Hannen inn. She disappears until you find her in the cellar, the Bann's next sacrifice, and begs you to free her. In a but-thou-must moment, you take her along.
She follows you along because she feels compelled to do it by the god of scripting, she remains quiet about her past. Since I tire of writing companions (I wrote them from down to up), I'll just say that she was raised on Hannen and was a troublemaker until she was eventually thrown out by her family. Alone, she grew cold and started stealing from everybody and became extremely skilled at it.
To further the problems (I love piling them up on one character), she developed a magical talent and kept it hidden. She never practiced her magic talents though and for all intents and purposes, her abilities remain rogue focused (with some small magic abilities that help her roguish attacks, like being able to ignite a poison in an enemy's veins if they were poisoned by her daggers beforehand).
Epilogue:
CRUELTY
If you talk with her and enforce the idea that she's never going to get a free ride in life and that everything has to be taken, Laerni would turn cold and heartless and heads back to Hannen to "finish" her family that threw her out years ago. Turning to assassination for a living instead of thievery, she'd eventually gain the notice of the Crows all the way from Antiva and would join their number as one of their best.
KINDNESS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you talk with her and tell her that she should be kind and nice to the people no matter what, Learni would eventually return to Hannen and work until she repays everything she's stolen from the people. Her family acknowledges her again and she forgives them. She eventually meets with another elf man, gets married and unfortunately dies during childbirth. The child is named Varric by her husband, after his deceased wife's friend that changed her life around.
IGNORED
If you didn't talk with her or didn't get far enough in her discussions, she returns to Hannen and continues her thieving life style until one day she gets caught by officials and executed infront of her family who don't even flinch at her death.
Duncan
Duncan was a Grey Warden that died tragically during the start of the Blight, he watched his two recruits trying to stop the Blight from the afterlife but facepalmed when they failed miserably at the top of Fort Drakon. Having given up all hope to end the Blight in a reasonable timeframe, Duncan stopped paying attention to the struggle of mortals.
During an attack by Sheryl Chee, Duncan was brought back to life (much to his surprise). Varric and company found themselves trapped in his beard, struggling to find a way out. After much struggling, Varric escaped from Duncan's beard (after Duncan kept making it worse and worse). After being confronted by Varric, he joins them in order to stop the Blight that his young recruits failed to stop.
Unfortunately, his death and rewritten life has left him a bit mentally unstable.
Epilogue:
FRIENDS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you befriended Duncan, he'd thank you for stopping the Blight and pull off his beard from his face and gives it to Varric. When asked what this means, he tells Varric that "you'll see" and he flaps his arms and flies away.
NOT FRIENDS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you treated Duncan horribly, he flies away and disappears. His beard reappears years later on the face of a peasant from Lothering, leaving Varric to wonder what happened to the man that helped him so long ago.
Lisa the Templar
ROMANCABLE
OPTIONAL
Lisa would be found in a camp near Redcliffe, she'd present you some trouble if you had any mage with you (Sebastian or Learni) and you'd have to fight her. Otherwise, she'd give you a few warnings about Redcliffe and what you should expect there.
After you've finished Redcliffe, the camp would be in ruins and a wounded Lisa is unconscious on the floor. She'd be surrounded by Darkspawn. If you decided to assist her by fighting the Darkspawn, you'd be given a second chance to carry her to your camp to treat her wounds. Once healed, she'd devote herself to your cause out of repayment for helping her.
Personality wise, she'd be the stereotypical templar but would warm up to Learni (but not care about Sebastian) if you traveled with them. She cares about people and would prefer innocents being helped even if it would cost her life, mostly opposing the player if they decided to play a bit more... "renegade". Should you help her out and be kind to her, she'd be able to get in a "romance" with Varric.
Her sidequest wasn't completed but what I had done was basically that she'd be confronted by some chantry figure and she'd have to decide between removing a camp of an apostate (the camps only protector) or oppose the chantry and lose her status as a templar, meaning that she'd either have to follow her morals or her duty.
Epilogue:
DUTY
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you helped her during the side quest to take down the apostate and bring it to the Chantry camp, she'd find it easier and easier to compromise her morals until eventually she does her duty without a second thought. Since Gregoir died during the final siege on Denerim where the Grey Wardens failed, she'd eventually please many Chantry officials and become the Knight-Commander in his place.
MORALS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you helped her during the side quest to oppose the Chantry and protecting the village from the Chantry, she'd find herself an exile and she'd be hunted by the templar. Unable to live a normal life, she'd eventually become a wanderer suffering from lyrium withdrawals.
DUTY-ROMANCE
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] The difference in this ending is that she refuses the position of Knight-Commander and would move to Kirkwall and be a templar there at Varric's side.
MORALS-ROMANCE
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] Instead of wandering, she joins Varric in Kirkwall and helps him with his organization though her withdrawals to lyrium eventually forces her to steal a shipment from a merchant and be captured by the Kirkwall guard. Varric watches from a distance as she's dragged away.
"EVIL"
She stays with her love, no matter what. She's spotted years later with Varric, wandering the land.
VARRIC PWNZ2002
Joke companion that would be seen from time to time assisting Varric on his journey through Teh Interweb, often acting like if he's an MMORPG player ("zomg wtf why do i have to carry teh newbz through this dungeon").
He disconnects once you gather all companions again and approach the final boss of the Teh Interweb. His fate afterward is unknown, he probably ragequit and went to play Call of Duty.
Mary Kirby
OPTIONAL
Last recruitable companion, Mary Kirby is the creator of Varric and cultist of Laidlaw. When her creation goes rogue, she's imprisoned until the death of both Sheryl and Lukas and is sent to kill her own creation. She underestimates him and is defeated, where there's an option to spare her or banish her to another dimension (Varric can't kill his creator or he disappears from reality).
She's recruited shortly before the last boss and is extremely powerful to balance out that you might not have gear to equip her in (she can't equip gear for this reason, just incase you came prepared).
EPILOGUE:
Mary would return to her duty as a writer, though she grows bored and writes herself into a dream world filled of awesome things to entertain herself. She's never heard from ever again.
I had started working on another companion that would've been added shortly after act 1, he would've been a male mercenary that follows Varric because his former employers are after him and somehow Varric would've been involved (no idea how, though hypothetically he would ask to follow Varric to the other town because he doesn't want to stay in "one place" for too long and mercenaries after him would attack you on-route.) He would've been the M/M romance option.
Weapons List
Won't list stats and elemental effects.
Ranged weapons (bows / crossbows) can be used in the back range without diminished damage.
The huge variance in damage is mostly due to the damage type and the stats that aren't being shown, for example the Nug Bomb looks insanely overpowered but stat wise it only had a 10% chance to hit.
Club
Description: Often used by wives to hit their cheating husbands.
+3 CRUSH DMG
Long Sword
Description: "Dwarven crafts, fine dwarven crafts! Straight from Orzammar!"
+5 SLASH DMG
Long Spear
Description: A weapon that doesn't exist in Ferelden.
+6 PIERCE DMG
Long Bow
Description: The invention of the bowstring has amazed people everywhere.
+4 PIERCE DMG
Leather Whip
Description: For those nights with the mistress.
+5 CRUSH DMG
Broad Sword
Description: An ordinary broadsword. Honestly, what more do you expect?
+10 SLASH DMG
Iron Claw
Description: Meow.
+5 SLASH DMG
Family Mace
Description: Don't bring this to the assembly.
+12 CRUSH DMG
Pitchfork
Description: Darkspawn fear the pitchfork.
+15 PIERCE DMG
Bastard Sword
Description: The name "Alistair" is engraved on the hilt.
+12 SLASH DMG
Qunari Battle Axe
Description: Qunari diplomacy at it's finest.
+22 SLASH DMG
Claymore
Description: The best laid plans...
+26 SLASH DMG
Lute
Description: This lute belonged to Oghren during his brief career as a bard, alcohol and blood stains the wood.
+28 CRUSH DMG
Flail
Description: Fangirls tend to use this a lot.
+25 CRUSH DMG
Sword of +1 DMG
Description: When running out of ideas for weapon names, resort to D&D!
+34 SLASH DMG
Crossbow
Description: Crossbow my heart and hope to die.
+33 PIERCE DMG
Morning Star
Description: Not a great start to a morning.
+31 CRUSH DMG
Rabbit's Claws
Description: Who the hell names their dog Rabbit?
+39 SLASH DMG
Raw Lyrium Spear
Description: Sniffed by templars, it explains all the apostates on the loose.
+39 PIERCE DMG
Chantry Staff
Description: For converting the heathens.
+50 CRUSH DMG
Large Fish
Description: Oghren never got around to lye it.
+41 CRUSH DMG
Whiskers Whip
Description: A whip made from zombie kitten whiskers.
+39 SLASH DMG
Writer's Spear
Description: For those nights when you wish you could harm trolls.
+43 PIERCE DMG
Old Spice Guy's Scarf
Description: "Hello ladies."
+50 HOLY DMG
Nug Bombs
Description: Trapped inside is a highly-flammable Nug.
+200 FIRE DMG
And a few more that I won't list... Varric-centric weapons that were outdated when we found out about Bianca.
Armor List
The huge variance in defense is, like the weapons, mostly because of stats and how it could absorb some damage types more than others.
Varric's Jacket
Description: Exposes one's chest to the delight (or horror) of all.
+5 DEF
Donut Necklace
Description: A gift from Varric's deceased aunt, it's dime-a-dozen.
Tethras Signet Ring
Description: Holds the crest of House Tethras.
+1 DEF
Leather Shield
Description: Smells like Antiva.
+2 DEF
Wooden Shield
Description: Slightly better than the Leather Shield.
+4 DEF
Summer Shield
Description: Guards against fire attacks and sunburns.
+4 DEF
Shield in Winter
Description: Grants protection against ice attacks. Better not lick it.
+4 DEF
Lyrium Shield
Description: It's lyrium, it only does EVERYTHING.
+7 DEF
Nug Shield
Description: A shield made from nug flesh. Disgusting.
+9 DEF
Fashionable Hat
Description: Gives -/+ 100 approval to any companion in Varric Age 7.
+3 DEF
Chain Coif
Description: Gives you a bad hairday.
+6 DEF
Redcliffe Helm
Description: The helmet of Furnley the Insane, a knight driven insane by Arlessa Isolde's constant asking of who he was.
+10 DEF
Chantry Circlet
Description: The symbol of the Chantry adorns the circlet. It's pretty.
+8 DEF
Lyrium Helm
Description: Might cause addiction if licked.
+16 DEF
Nug Helm
Description: A dozen of Nugs were killed to make this helmet. Let their sacrifice not be in vain, brave hero.
+12 DEF
Circle Robe
Description: A "HELLO TEMPLARS, COME GET ME" sign across all of Thedas for apostates.
Leather Armor
Description: The armor for all newbie hero companions.
+5 DEF
Mail Armor
Description: Mail call.
+7 DEF
Enchanter's Robe
Description: Enchantment?
+6 DEF
Templar's Breastplate
Description: Extremely fashionable.
+12 DEF
N7 ARMOR
Description: Oops wrong game series.
+17 DEF
Blood Mage Robe
Description: Covered in blood, nobody will know this is a Blood Mage's robe.
+10 DEF
Hot Ring
Description: Makes you attractive.
Cold Ring
Description: Can't defrost this ice queen.
Gaider's Gauntlet
Description: Belonging to the lead writer, it grants double XP.
Dwarven Earrings
Description: Makes you better at telling stories, making you immune to silence.
Grey Warden's Oath
Description: Makes you immune to the taint and critical strikes.
Fairy Shoes
Description: Big enough to cover a toe or two, increasing agility.
Nutella Ring
Description: Smears you in Nutella, recovering some health overtime.
Ring of Understanding
Description: Halves MP cost at the cost of understanding forum trolls.
Plot Armor
Description: Varric only. "I'm in the sequel!"
Uber long, complete Legend of Varric post.
Very long post incoming, I lost my drive halfway through so excuse me if the ending seems rushed and sorry if something isn't explained properly. I've been doing this in one sitting and my mind is melting. I'll answer any questions, though.
LEGEND OF VARRIC
FULL PLOT
ACT 1
Legend of Varric starts with a narration that explains the unfortunate fate of the Warden and his warden companion, having built up an army they failed miserably during the final siege on Denerim and it wiped out Ferelden's last defense. The Blight remains unchecked, the nations are scrambling and refugees are fleeing everywhere.
Though none of that matters, Varric is heading to the local inn in Kirkwall to relax! Rain falls from the sky (zomg foreshadowing) and a beggar is asking for money, though nobody really cares about the beggars in games because what are the chances they'd give you something of use aside from boring information that you'd probably be able to get elsewhere?
Oh well, who cares. Varric walks into the bar and finds it almost filled with many different personalities, each of them having their own little joke like a forgetful mother talking to her frustrated son, but none of it matters and to continue the game you're forced to take a seat at the other side of the counter to drink some Montsimmard Red with your name on it.
Drinking isn't that great thing to do when you're a protagonist of a game, though. It often leads to troublesome events! Anyways, let's ignore that friendly advice and say that Varric didn't listen. Drunk and angry with a local guard, they enter a brawl where Varric reveals his chest hair and it melts the guard's face off. "End of line", a powerful voice in the distance yells and a magical hammer flies toward Varric.
Waking up in a dark room sitting on a stone throne (MORE STONE FOR THE STONE THRONE, MORE WINE FOR THE WINE GOD /obscurereference), Varric finds himself in a trial against the Maker and Stanley Woo who gives him a choice:
---
Be permabanned.
By accepting to be permabanned, Varric finds himself apologizing to the player for not giving him much of a game and he's banished into a fate of permabanation. The game ends, the game over screen appears and the game goes back to the menu.
Stop the Blight.
By agreeing to stop the Blight, Varric is sent to an island called Hannen off the shore of Ferelden. It's such a secluded area that nobody on Ferelden knows of it's existance (that or it might be a horrible way to introduce new landmass in a universe that already exists!). You're told to find your own travel into Ferelden proper. Game continues below. VVV
---
Hannen Village (the villagers suffer from not being creative, so the village is named after the island) is filled with refugees, guards prevent people from going into the market and you're trapped in the starting area alone. Talking to refugees just leads to a lot of QQing, speaking to the guards might get you killed and speaking to the merchant allows you to buy stuff but you probably don't have money because you haven't killed anything yet (what's the deal with everything holding money? IDK)
If you enter the inn, you'd find it filled with more refugees and the same innkeeper from Kirkwall who admit that since the destruction of all the inns in Ferelden because of the Blight he started a new business in Ferelden and is making a killing from it. He turns into a recurring character, all inns in the game have him as an innkeeper.
The innkeeper sends you to Sebastian (Companion! Look at the end of this "summary" for information on them) who needs help with a task, he promises to get you into Ferelden if you help him. You can refuse the task but you're unable to move the game foward without accepting, so be a (wo)man and accept already! ... accepted yet? Okay.
He needs help with a tower north of Hannen, so Varric leaves town and walks to the tower with Sebastian in tow. Once at the tower, Varric explains to you that he's an apostate and so is his daughter. He explains that they live in this tower where barely anybody shows up because they think it's haunted, but due to the tower's abandoned and old nature it started collapsing and Sebastian was unable to reach his daughter and hired help to rebuild.
Too bad they were too scared and ran away (actually it was a murder plot and the guy pulled the men out to conceal the evidence, too long of a sidequest to explain with how tired I am of writing) leaving Varric the crew's only responsibility. After finding some rope, the tools and some planks you're able to move foward deeper into the tower where Sebastian's daughter is.
Oh no! The room is abandoned and it looks like nobody has been there! You and Sebastian can sleep in her bed, you can look around for stuff but there's nothing and the only way to continue is up! *points* Go on, go!
At the top of the tower, Sebastian's daughter is there and she talks to her father a while before noticing Varric and interrupting her father to ask who he is and why she can't see him properly. Something is amiss, she wants Varric to come closer and Varric refuses saying he doesn't listen to suggestive orders by creepy women. She pushes her father aside, orders Varric to come (and her model starts changing to another look) and surprise! She's actually an abomination, taken over by a desire demon!
After killing her, Sebastian cries with his daughter's dying corpse in her arms and she admits that she took the demon in because she was lonely and needed company. The demon takes over her for a few more seconds, she says that Varric is the destined "Destroyer" before her host dies. Sebastian keeps crying over his deceased daughter's corpse and you can soothe him or just tell him you'll meet at the bottom of the tower.
Either way, Sebastian notices something in the distance and Varric turns around to check out what what it is. Smoke is coming from Hannen, what does this mean? Who cares! We're going to find out soon enough! Upon approaching Hannen, the overworld icon has been replaced with burned down buildings and the entire north quarter is on fire.
Upon entering Hannen again, you find corpses littering the floor and some rioters start attacking you. "What's going on?" Sebastian asks, though how the hell should you know? You weren't there either! With the guards (and refugees) gone, you can heard into the trade district and find the rioters destroying everything and fighting the guards and citizens of Hannen.
The Captain of the Guard (named Johnathan) approaches you and notices Sebastian, they talk for a while and they explain the scenario. You're told that the Bann has been taking refugees in the cover of night and this angered the refugees greatly, the guards tried to keep the situation under control but a riot started anyways and now the guards are trying to simply protect their village from the angered rioters.
Sebastian says that as much as he promised you for a path into Ferelden, he has to make sure his home is safe and asks you to help. If you refuse now, he leaves on his own to the manor while if you accept he stays with you. Either way, you're forced to stop the riots in a but-thou-must moment because you have no way to leave Hannen. Sebastian joins you back near the manor if you refused to help him.
Sebastian says he knows the manor like the back of his hand, shows you a secret passage that leads you into the estate's dungeon and you have to fight a bunch of manor guards that think you're rioters. In a prison cell, you find Learni (the thief who tried to steal from you earlier, another companion who's story can be found after this "summary") who begs you to get her out or she's "next". She explains that the Bann are taking people for a sort of ritual, you don't know what but it can't be good if the people don't return. Right?
Now you're given a bunch of options to go through the manor, you either fight through it completely / you sneak through it or you pretend your servants until you reach the end. I personally loved being servants, as I had more fun writing the dialogue in that scenario where the guards ask when the hell they got a dwarf servant.
Either way you got through the mansion, you'd find yourselves at a game show at the end of the mansion where you're asked a lot of things and stupid references happen if you lose. For example, A Wicker Man reference if they "unleash" the bees.
Either way, if you're good and answer all the questions correctly or just fail miserably and deal with the punishments (most likely monster attacks or -HP things), you'll reach the Bann's room and find out that the ritual he's doing is... blood magic, Sebastian calls him a hypocrite (part of his backstory) and the Bann turns out to reveal that the blood magic is sustaining his daughter's life (though she's in a coma), Sebastian is shocked to see the Bann's daughter alive and (is implied) to fall on his knees.
The Captain of the Guard shows up (saying he followed you), sees the ritual and calls the Bann a monster and says he'll be punished for everything he did. The Bann says that the town is nothing without him, he's all that's holding it together.
... Sebastian doesn't know who to side with, he says that the Bann did horrible things to him years ago but he doesn't know how he feels condemning the woman (who he says is his wife) to death while Laerni wants the Bann dead.
---
SIDE WITH JOHNATHAN, CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD
The Bann casts blood magic and takes over John, you're forced to fight both of them. After the boss fight, John snaps out of it and "wakes" up. The Bann struggles a while, blood starts spilling out and he calls out his daughter's name before the ritual ends and she dies. He looks at Sebastian, says that he's responsible for this and dies.
The Captain of the Guard decides that now with the Bann dead, the riots should probably cease when he delivers the news to the refugees. He thanks you for all your help, Sebastian goes to see his wife's corpse and wonders if she even wanted this.
EPILOGUE:
After you beat the game, you'd find out that while the riots did cease and the refugees were relieved, it cost Hannen greatly. Without it's Bann that kept refugees outside the city, refugees flooded the town and began to take a lot of resources. This eventually led to many of Hannen's residents moving away, so when all the refugees had finally crossed the ocean out of Ferelden the town was unable to sustain itself and Hannen's community died.
SIDE WITH THE BANN
Sebastian is surprised, Laerni is disgusted but decides to trust you. John looks at you in surprise, saying that you're endorsing this kind of ritual and says that he should never have trusted you. He throws his sword and manages to hurt the Bann greatly, he calls for guards and the room floods with them. Boss fight!
After you finish defeating waves of guards, you fight John himself. Compared to the Bann though, he's a pushover and he dies calling Varric a monster. Sebastian heals the Bann after the battle, the Bann shakes Sebastian's hand and appreciates what he did today. Learni leaves the room, disgusted with what you've done.
Sebastian walks up to his wife, he kisses her and apologizes for everything. He questions himself if she even wants to be sustained this way, which the Bann replies that it didn't matter and his daughter is all he cares about. The Bann says that he now has to deal with these riots and bring them in with force.
EPILOGUE:
After you beat the game, you'd find out that the riots were shut down with violence. Eventually, refugees began to avoid Hannen Island while fleeing Ferelden and the village soon fell back into obscurity. Many of Hannen's residents would express approval and the community remained as it always has. Though rumors of the Bann's secret were often spread around town, they'd fall silent soon afterward.
---
Note: The above choice will change some interaction with Laerni and Sebastian:
Sebastian will feel guilty of his wife's murder (if you sided with John)
Laerni will be grateful and say the Bann had it coming (if you sided with John)
Sebastian will be wondering if leaving his wife to... "that" fate is worse than death (if you sided with the Bann)
Laerni will say that he should've died, that he killed a lot of people and she was supposed to be one of them (if you sided with the Bann)
Either way, Sebastian decides that he's sick of Hannen and wants to get off it with you. He pledges himself your cause and Laerni decides to do so too (even if you sided with the Bann), Sebastian says he'll wait at the port south of town. You can roam around Hannen, talk with the citizens and find out how they feel about your choice.
When you're sick of people going "yay" or "nay", go to the harbor and the screen fades to black.
END ACT 1
Intermission:
Two hooded figures (one sitting in a throne) are in a dark chamber are talking, the leader asks where "she" is and appears angry at something. Suddenly doors open and a woman being followed by two hurlocks approaches the center the of the room, it's revealed who these people are: David Gaider is the hooded leader, the other figure is Sheryl Chee and the woman that they were waiting for is Mary Kirby.
They confront Mary, asking how her creation (Varric) is loose on Thedas. She says she doesn't know, though Gaider doesn't buy it and orders the hurlocks to carry her away. She struggles but she's dragged out of the room. Sheryl asks if Gaider has any plans to stop Varric, he shakes his head and decides that Sheryl should deal with it.
Sheryl laughs, saying it'll be fun to take down Mary's creation and teleports away. Gaider sits on his throne contemplating about his next course of action.
ACT 2
Varric, Sebastian and Laerni get off the boat talking about a lot of things that happened onboard that you didn't get to see. Darn, that could've been fun. Oh well! Welcome to the Ferelden Remnants camp, a camp of those remain behind to try and take their country back no matter how doomed it is.
Since most important players could die during Origins, the only person here that you could probably recognize is Queen Anora who is holding council with a few guards when you first approach her. When questioned why she hasn't fled Ferelden yet, she says it's because the game needed a familiar face no matter how much it doesn't make sense.
After doing some errands to help the camp (mostly clearing vermin, helping a few outposts and stuff) you come back in to a dark scene, everybody is dead except for one guard who warns to run to the Queen. Near the Queen is Sheryl Chee, dancing around on the table infront of Anora waiting for Varric. When Varric approaches, she kills him with a magic bolt but then frowns with disappointment saying it was too easy.
A quick revival of Varric, she summons forth a revived Duncan and banishes Varric and company into his beard to live out the rest of their (short) lives. Welcome to the Duncan's Beard dungeon, probably one of the weirdest and most fun concepts I had to explore with the game.
As you progress through the dungeon fighting the Fleaspawn, you'll find small communities inside his beard (filled with beard dwelling gnomes). The gnomes often make beard jokes so hopefully you wouldn't get tired of them.
Though the problem with this dungeon, the gimmick as some might say, is that Duncan is a very bored individual and will do many things that will impact the dungeon in odd ways.
After traveling through 1/4 of the dungeon, a cutcene would show of Duncan deciding that he wants to shave and pieces of the dungeon start falling away. Razors would pass from time to time during scripted scenes and kill giant groups of Fleaspawn.
After finishing 2/4 of the dungeon, Duncan decides to try and barbaque but his beard catches fire and not the dungeon is filled with fire and you have to avoid it or get hurt. The fire moves around randomly, standing in it will reduce your health extremely quickly. Now you're capable of fighting flaming fleaspawn! Fire resistant gear is nice here.
After another 3/4 of the dungeon, Duncan wants to take a bath and goes swimming in the ocean. The beard is now flooded and wet fleaspawn will start attacking you, though they are easily dealt with if you use lightning attacks.
At the very end of the dungeon, you find the Archbeetle and slay it. Upon doing so, you grow to full size and escape the dungeon. You can yell at Duncan a lot afterward, though he joins you anyways. Now you can swap party members, wooo!
The camp's survivors gather around Queen Anora and they want to attack Sheryl, though they are unable to do so because of how higher level her guards are. Queen Anora is pleased to see you alive, she explains to you that since Sheryl used too much magic to send you into Duncan's beard she's weakened and her palace is exposed.
After many discussions where the guards at the camp decide that they'll distract the higher level guards at the palace to get a small crew in, you are given free reigns to move everywhere again. Wonderful, isn't it? When you're ready to go to Sheryl Chee's palace, there's a portal to the north of town that will take the crew there (where the guards are waiting).
Done? Alright! Sheryl Chee's palace is found in the Writer's Realm, a realm of unstable energy and the entire castle suffers for it. When the guards distract the giant monster guards, you sneak in. The castle has no distinct theme, half of it has different panels and switches everywhere can change the tempature of the castle from boiling hot to freezing cold.
After manipulating the tempature, fighting a lot of darkspawn minions and strange creatures that shouldn't exist you'll find Sheryl's throne room where she sits there petting a nug. After drinking from her chalice of tears, she throws it aside and a battle starts between Sheryl and Varric (+company).
Once defeated, Sheryl says that Gaider won't let this stand and that Varric won't stop what they set in motion. A choice appears for five seconds, though it's pointless because zombie kittens appear and Sheryl yells out Mary's name before the kittens devour her. The kittens look at Varric but burst into flames instead of attacking, when the party members wonder what happened Varric realizes he let his shirt unbuttoned.
Varric leaves the Writer's Realm and is greeted by the cheers of guards and Queen Anora, Varric raises his brow and is confused. Anora points in the distance and a formly blighted land has been cured, they assumed it was something Varric and company did. Varric looks at the forest and wonders what it means before the screen fades to black.
END ACT 2.
Intermission:
Gaider has Mary dragged infront of him, he tells her that Sheryl has failed in stopping Varric. Mary doesn't appear shocked and says if Gaider needs help in controlling the situation, Gaider says that he has everything under control has sent Lukas & Jennifer to deal with it. Mary says it won't work, Gaider's eyes glow red for a second and says that it'll work and they haven't worked this hard on the Blight for it to fail now.
Mary is carried away again and Gaider apologizes to Sheryl, saying that "the one" will bring her back.
ACT 3
Act 3 comes back into the Ferelden Remnants Camp where everybody is drunk, including Varric, after celebrating the unblightness of the land. After much discussing, they decide that Varric is their best hope of stopping the Blight and he has to do everything because he's the protagonist. Varric and companions stop celebrating as the guards drink themselves silly, Varric leaves the celebrating behind and pouts at the other side of the camp.
Here a vision of Redcliffe castle appears before him, he doesn't know if it's the alcohol or something he ate but a voice tells him that Redcliffe holds the secret to stopping the Blight. After the vision ends, Varric turns around to notice the other companions have also noticed it. They decide that they can't fight fate and set off toward Redcliffe, much to the chagrin of Varric and the celebration of the guards.
Lots of traveling, passing by Orzammar where the dwarves sealed the gate and won't let you in unless you know the secret knock and seeing unusual sights like the Fellowship of the Sock. Though there's a few serious sights, like you'd meet Lisa (optional companion) if you entered the camp near Redcliffe (she's protecting some people fleeing north, she attacks you if you have either Sebastian / Laerni in the party and that's extremely likely. She stops attacking after two turns anyway.)
Once you arrive to Redcliffe, you find lots of dead darkspawn. That's a good sign, right? When you enter Redcliffe castle, you'd enter a lobby with lots of locked doors. Welcome to Redcliffe Castle dungeon! Wooooo!
As you'd walk through the castle, you'd be attacked by ghosts and zombies as you go through it. Outside of combat, some doors disappear after you go through them, some hallways suddenly close off, some statues move around with you, you see some butlers and stuff but they are always out of your reach and they disappear when you get too close. SelphieSK did a lot of work on Redcliffe castle, I changed a few things but she did an amazing job on it. So props to her!
After dealing with the hauntings, fighting through the undead and reaching the end you'll find Lukas and Jennifer. They sent you the vision, hoping you'd fall for their trap and -you- did. Boss fight, stuff happens but Lukas writes himself away before you finish him off. Jennifer tries to do the same but her pen is out of ink, so she's slain.
Varric leaves Redcliffe and notices that the land around it is cured, he thinks the writers are tied to the Blight and the way he can stop it and cure the land is by slaying every single one of them. The companions argue over this, saying that without the writers the world wouldn't exist. Varric shrugs it off and says they'll have to deal with that when it happens.
Some darkspawn attack the surrounding settlements but it's optional if you want to save them or not, it just gets you a few items and the possibility of recruiting the templar from before. If you save them or not, your next objective looms in the distance... the Lukas Tower, a repurposed Circle Tower.
Unfortunately the path is surrounded by darkspawn and you're given two paths: Do you fight through the Darkspawn, reach a boat on the other side and use it to go to the tower or do you fly there on the back of a gryphon?
Fighting the darkspawn is quite easy because it's simply killing darkspawn until you reach the tower.
The gryphon is more complicated because you have to collect the fossils and revive it, the fossils are found in caves to the south of Redcliffe ("medium bosses" defend each bone) and the revival spell is easily down by going to camp and asking Sebastian to do it.
Once you reach the tower itself, it's one large trek of door switch puzzles (that I don't wish to explain since I'm getting -really- tired of writing now). The end of the tower has Lukas surrounded by Pride Demons, you fight them and eventually Lukas - as he's about to write himself away after the end of the battle the papers suddenly disappear and Lukas realizes what happened but dies before he can say anything.
The tower begins to collapse, you have ten minutes (outside of combat) to escape or it's game over. The darkspawn in the tower don't know what to do and mostly get crushed by falling debris, debris is scripted though so you can't get hit. This is mostly to test out your memory on the door puzzles.
After escaping the tower and realizing the boat / gryphon has left, Varric opens his shirt and the chest hair absorbs the lake water and you keep running through the lake bed until the tower explodes. Fade to black.
END ACT 3.
Intermission:
Gaider is getting desperate, he's swearing under his breath as the writing team is falling apart. He orders the Hurlocks to bring Mary to the throne room as he drinks from his Mug of Tears. He turns around and tells Tonia to gather the other writers and leave back to the real world, that he and Mary will finish Varric off.
Mary enters the room as Tonia leaves, Gaider tells her about the deaths of Jennifer and Lukas and how the Blight is disappearing. Mary nods and Gaider says he knows that Mary cares about her creation and has been protecting him, he says that the "Dark Lord Laidlaw" wouldn't approve.
The scene ends with Gaider saying that Laidlaw will be summoned in this world soon and nothing Varric or Mary does will stop them, darkness surrounds him and he laughs as Mary shrieks.
FINAL ACT
Varric wakes up in a cell, his companions surrounding him in different cells and a strange creature walking around laughing at all of them. When questioned, the creature says that he's not allowed to talk to the "Destroyer". You're then asked to make one of the companions you recruited talk to / deal with the creature instead.
Sebastian will ask the creature what it's purpose is and what it hopes to achieve by keeping them locked here, it says it's higher ups ordered it to do so and when he questions it further it's head explode and all doors open (as they were tied to it's life).
Laerni would act flirty, saying it's such a nice creature and handsome until it approachs the cage and then she'd kill it. The cages open.
Lisa would make it question it's faith in it's higherups, making it rebel against them and open her cell door. Unfortunately, since the doors are tied to it's life, it explodes.
Duncan would make the creature go through the Joining, he'd apologize to it as it fails and dies resulting in the doors opening.
Either way, once you're done with the creature you'll encouter more outside the room and you find out that these things are forum trolls and you're trapped in the Writer's Realm. Who brought you here? Who knows! The team would find a vending machine that happens to sell equipment and beds if you want to restore / rest.
After dealing with all this, you'll have to go through the Writer's Realm and fight all sorts of things like angry posters (actual posters) and forum trolls until you reach the second floor where you'd find haters. There are 6 floors and each represent a different type of community member, from blind fanboys / fangirls to senseless haters.
Once you're done with all of them, you'll find Mary Kirby's room and reading her diary hints to you that she's the one that sent the zombie kittens to eat Sheryl and she's the one who wrote away the papers from Lukas. Once you enter the next room, Mary attacks the group and she's surrounded by darkness. Varric orders the group to not kill Mary because she's his creator and killing her would sever his connection to reality.
You're given a choice in the battle, fighting the darkness (which have a lot more health than Mary) or fight Mary. If you kill Mary, the fight ends and she thanks you for freeing her and fuses with your chest hair (allowing Varric to live in reality without his creator being alive). Kill the darkness on the other hand and Mary is freed, she says she was taken over by her former master.
Freed from the darkness, Mary (who can now be used as a companion) explains to Varric that she was helping him because she fears what the Dark Lord Laidlaw would do when he'd be summoned. She explains that Gaider is trying to finish the summoning ritual, that she wrote Varric to show up at the Writer's Realm because she hopes that her creation can stop Gaider before it's too late. (If Mary dies, Gaider explains it a bit more by mocking him for slaying his creator.)
You leave the room in time to notice Gaider leaving the Writer's Realm, if you chase him then you find yourself at the top of Fort Drakon. Gaider asks who set Varric on this foolish quest to stop the summoning, Varric says he's just trying to stop the Blight by Woo's orders. Surprised by hearing this, Gaider wonders why he didn't tell the QA team about their plan.
Gaider reveals that he's the one that started the Blight, he needed the souls of the dead to open a rift through dimensions to bring the Dark Lord Laidlaw into the world. He laughs at your foolishness and says the ritual is almost done, he just needs a little bit more time.
Note: If Mary is with you, Gaider teases her foolishness and explains that she'll regret it when Laidlaw is summoned.
The Archdemon shows up and challenges Varric and company, though it isn't much of a challenge due to how strong they've bonded or some other JRPG trope where the power of friendship stops the villain quite easily. Gaider turns around to notice that there isn't enough time for the ritual to finish and he's about to be slain, he roars in defiance and finishes the summoning earlier than should be.
The disembodied ghostly head of Laidlaw appears over the rift of souls and cries for release, he demands to Gaider why he was summoned early and Gaider says it's because the summoning was about to finish. (If Mary is there, she gasps when she sees Laidlaw appear)
Laidlaw, furious at how the ritual was interrupted, floats down to Gaider and says that he's using his body as the host. Gaider yells out in agony as they refuse together and make Lord Gaidlaw. A final battle happens between Lord Gaidlaw and Varric.
After the final battle, Gaidlaw stands again and proves that he cannot die because he's a god. Stanley Woo appears and says that the Blight has ended, Gaidlaw is weakened and won't be able to stay in Thedas for long before he disappers. Gaidlaw asks Woo how he knew of the plan if he wasn't informed, Woo says that he read the script. (If Mary is with you, she says she's the one who sent the script to Woo)
Woo turns around to look at Varric, he congratulates Varric for getting this far. Varric, confused by this revelation, looks back at both Gaidlaw and he shrugs. Woo tries to permaban Gaidlaw but finds his powers useless towards him, Gaidlaw laughs.
Woo asks Varric and company to think of a solution, he'll distract Gaidlaw in the meantime. You're given a dialogue of how to deal with the situation, each companion giving their thoughts on it.
Suggestion 1: [GOOD ENDING 1] Brought up by Sebastian, he suggests that with enough strength and magic they'd be able to seal Gaidlaw in the rift again. He states that the rift is weakened though and if there were other events in the near future that involved a lot of death then the rift might rip open and unleash a fully powered Gaidlaw upon the world.
Suggestion 2: ["GOOD" ENDING 2] Brought up my Duncan, they send Gaidlaw into the real world and seal him there, Thedas would be saved the wrath of Gaidlaw forever but the real world would suffer the consequences.
Suggestion 3: [EVIL ENDING] Brought up by Laerni (unless "kind), Varric uses his chest hair to absorb Gaidlaw, becoming one with him. It's unknown what would happen but by the opinions of every companion, it's... a bad thing.
Suggestion 4: [Fail ending] Gaiderlaw is allowed to destroy Thedas.
---
Suggestion 1 ending: Varric approaches Gaidlaw who is ready to finish off Woo and punches him, sending him skyrocketing in the sky into the rift and banishing him there, Woo thanks Varric and they walk off into the sunset (though they fall off the building before the screen fades to black).
It is said in the text epilogue that Ferelden rebuilt slowly after the writers (and by association, the Blight) were defeated and monuments of all the dead were built in a large graveyard south of Denerim. Many look up to the sky and see the rift, not wondering how it'll open but when as they know their problem's solution isn't permanant.
Suggestion 2 ending: Sebastian warps the rift using his magic to change it into a portal to the real world, Varric orders Woo to throw Gaidlaw in and he does so. The portal closes when Gaidlaw enters.
In the text epilogue, similar to ending one, Ferelden built memorials for the dead but they also built a monument for the dead of the real world so that nobody would forget the sacrifice they had to do so Thedas could live without fear.
Suggestion 3: Varric absorbs Gaidlaw with his chest hair, groaning and struggling as the god-man struggles to be absorbed. After being absorbed, Varric laughs and his eyes glow red. Some companions will freak out, asking if Varric is still in control. Varric says he is but some (or all on some circumstance) don't believe him and attack him, one last battle happens between the companions that attack you and Varric with maxed out stats and powerful abilities.
The text epilogue for this one is quite simple, it explains that Varric took over the title of Dark Lord and cowed most of Thedas into his rule. People were never able to tell if this was the actual Varric who had full control of himself, Gaidlaw who ceased control of Varric or a mix of both personalities.
Suggestion 4: Rocks fall, everybody dies except for Gaidlaw who goes on to rebuild Thedas in his image.
---
Anyway you ended the game, the game would skip to another scene after the epilogue (where it showed you all the companion endings / side quest endings and such) where a dwarf was sitting infront of a dozen children who are all listening to his story.
The dwarf says the story is over and asks how it was to the kids, the kids say it doesn't make any sense and it's filled with plot holes and that it's horrible. The dwarf gets mad and is about to say something vulgar when Varric walks in, the kids praise him (or are scared of him depending on the ending).
The original dwarf storyteller, revealed to be Bartrand, tells Varric that he was trying to exaggerate and create a tale to entertain these kids but admits he's not the storyteller of the family. Varric agrees with him, tells him to go prepare for his role in Dragon Age 2 and sits down in the chair looking at the kids saying if they want to hear a real story.
Game ends.
COMPANION LIST
Sebastian was covered in far more detail than the other companions will be here.
Laerni
Learni is introduced early, even before Sebastian, as an elven thief that tries to pickpocket Varric while walking to the Hannen inn. She disappears until you find her in the cellar, the Bann's next sacrifice, and begs you to free her. In a but-thou-must moment, you take her along.
She follows you along because she feels compelled to do it by the god of scripting, she remains quiet about her past. Since I tire of writing companions (I wrote them from down to up), I'll just say that she was raised on Hannen and was a troublemaker until she was eventually thrown out by her family. Alone, she grew cold and started stealing from everybody and became extremely skilled at it.
To further the problems (I love piling them up on one character), she developed a magical talent and kept it hidden. She never practiced her magic talents though and for all intents and purposes, her abilities remain rogue focused (with some small magic abilities that help her roguish attacks, like being able to ignite a poison in an enemy's veins if they were poisoned by her daggers beforehand).
Epilogue:
CRUELTY
If you talk with her and enforce the idea that she's never going to get a free ride in life and that everything has to be taken, Laerni would turn cold and heartless and heads back to Hannen to "finish" her family that threw her out years ago. Turning to assassination for a living instead of thievery, she'd eventually gain the notice of the Crows all the way from Antiva and would join their number as one of their best.
KINDNESS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you talk with her and tell her that she should be kind and nice to the people no matter what, Learni would eventually return to Hannen and work until she repays everything she's stolen from the people. Her family acknowledges her again and she forgives them. She eventually meets with another elf man, gets married and unfortunately dies during childbirth. The child is named Varric by her husband, after his deceased wife's friend that changed her life around.
IGNORED
If you didn't talk with her or didn't get far enough in her discussions, she returns to Hannen and continues her thieving life style until one day she gets caught by officials and executed infront of her family who don't even flinch at her death.
Duncan
Duncan was a Grey Warden that died tragically during the start of the Blight, he watched his two recruits trying to stop the Blight from the afterlife but facepalmed when they failed miserably at the top of Fort Drakon. Having given up all hope to end the Blight in a reasonable timeframe, Duncan stopped paying attention to the struggle of mortals.
During an attack by Sheryl Chee, Duncan was brought back to life (much to his surprise). Varric and company found themselves trapped in his beard, struggling to find a way out. After much struggling, Varric escaped from Duncan's beard (after Duncan kept making it worse and worse). After being confronted by Varric, he joins them in order to stop the Blight that his young recruits failed to stop.
Unfortunately, his death and rewritten life has left him a bit mentally unstable.
Epilogue:
FRIENDS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you befriended Duncan, he'd thank you for stopping the Blight and pull off his beard from his face and gives it to Varric. When asked what this means, he tells Varric that "you'll see" and he flaps his arms and flies away.
NOT FRIENDS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you treated Duncan horribly, he flies away and disappears. His beard reappears years later on the face of a peasant from Lothering, leaving Varric to wonder what happened to the man that helped him so long ago.
Lisa the Templar
ROMANCABLE
OPTIONAL
Lisa would be found in a camp near Redcliffe, she'd present you some trouble if you had any mage with you (Sebastian or Learni) and you'd have to fight her. Otherwise, she'd give you a few warnings about Redcliffe and what you should expect there.
After you've finished Redcliffe, the camp would be in ruins and a wounded Lisa is unconscious on the floor. She'd be surrounded by Darkspawn. If you decided to assist her by fighting the Darkspawn, you'd be given a second chance to carry her to your camp to treat her wounds. Once healed, she'd devote herself to your cause out of repayment for helping her.
Personality wise, she'd be the stereotypical templar but would warm up to Learni (but not care about Sebastian) if you traveled with them. She cares about people and would prefer innocents being helped even if it would cost her life, mostly opposing the player if they decided to play a bit more... "renegade". Should you help her out and be kind to her, she'd be able to get in a "romance" with Varric.
Her sidequest wasn't completed but what I had done was basically that she'd be confronted by some chantry figure and she'd have to decide between removing a camp of an apostate (the camps only protector) or oppose the chantry and lose her status as a templar, meaning that she'd either have to follow her morals or her duty.
Epilogue:
DUTY
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you helped her during the side quest to take down the apostate and bring it to the Chantry camp, she'd find it easier and easier to compromise her morals until eventually she does her duty without a second thought. Since Gregoir died during the final siege on Denerim where the Grey Wardens failed, she'd eventually please many Chantry officials and become the Knight-Commander in his place.
MORALS
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] If you helped her during the side quest to oppose the Chantry and protecting the village from the Chantry, she'd find herself an exile and she'd be hunted by the templar. Unable to live a normal life, she'd eventually become a wanderer suffering from lyrium withdrawals.
DUTY-ROMANCE
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] The difference in this ending is that she refuses the position of Knight-Commander and would move to Kirkwall and be a templar there at Varric's side.
MORALS-ROMANCE
[GOOD ENDINGS ONLY] Instead of wandering, she joins Varric in Kirkwall and helps him with his organization though her withdrawals to lyrium eventually forces her to steal a shipment from a merchant and be captured by the Kirkwall guard. Varric watches from a distance as she's dragged away.
"EVIL"
She stays with her love, no matter what. She's spotted years later with Varric, wandering the land.
VARRIC PWNZ2002
Joke companion that would be seen from time to time assisting Varric on his journey through Teh Interweb, often acting like if he's an MMORPG player ("zomg wtf why do i have to carry teh newbz through this dungeon").
He disconnects once you gather all companions again and approach the final boss of the Teh Interweb. His fate afterward is unknown, he probably ragequit and went to play Call of Duty.
Mary Kirby
OPTIONAL
Last recruitable companion, Mary Kirby is the creator of Varric and cultist of Laidlaw. When her creation goes rogue, she's imprisoned until the death of both Sheryl and Lukas and is sent to kill her own creation. She underestimates him and is defeated, where there's an option to spare her or banish her to another dimension (Varric can't kill his creator or he disappears from reality).
She's recruited shortly before the last boss and is extremely powerful to balance out that you might not have gear to equip her in (she can't equip gear for this reason, just incase you came prepared).
EPILOGUE:
Mary would return to her duty as a writer, though she grows bored and writes herself into a dream world filled of awesome things to entertain herself. She's never heard from ever again.
I had started working on another companion that would've been added shortly after act 1, he would've been a male mercenary that follows Varric because his former employers are after him and somehow Varric would've been involved (no idea how, though hypothetically he would ask to follow Varric to the other town because he doesn't want to stay in "one place" for too long and mercenaries after him would attack you on-route.) He would've been the M/M romance option.
Weapons List
Won't list stats and elemental effects.
Ranged weapons (bows / crossbows) can be used in the back range without diminished damage.
The huge variance in damage is mostly due to the damage type and the stats that aren't being shown, for example the Nug Bomb looks insanely overpowered but stat wise it only had a 10% chance to hit.
Club
Description: Often used by wives to hit their cheating husbands.
+3 CRUSH DMG
Long Sword
Description: "Dwarven crafts, fine dwarven crafts! Straight from Orzammar!"
+5 SLASH DMG
Long Spear
Description: A weapon that doesn't exist in Ferelden.
+6 PIERCE DMG
Long Bow
Description: The invention of the bowstring has amazed people everywhere.
+4 PIERCE DMG
Leather Whip
Description: For those nights with the mistress.
+5 CRUSH DMG
Broad Sword
Description: An ordinary broadsword. Honestly, what more do you expect?
+10 SLASH DMG
Iron Claw
Description: Meow.
+5 SLASH DMG
Family Mace
Description: Don't bring this to the assembly.
+12 CRUSH DMG
Pitchfork
Description: Darkspawn fear the pitchfork.
+15 PIERCE DMG
Bastard Sword
Description: The name "Alistair" is engraved on the hilt.
+12 SLASH DMG
Qunari Battle Axe
Description: Qunari diplomacy at it's finest.
+22 SLASH DMG
Claymore
Description: The best laid plans...
+26 SLASH DMG
Lute
Description: This lute belonged to Oghren during his brief career as a bard, alcohol and blood stains the wood.
+28 CRUSH DMG
Flail
Description: Fangirls tend to use this a lot.
+25 CRUSH DMG
Sword of +1 DMG
Description: When running out of ideas for weapon names, resort to D&D!
+34 SLASH DMG
Crossbow
Description: Crossbow my heart and hope to die.
+33 PIERCE DMG
Morning Star
Description: Not a great start to a morning.
+31 CRUSH DMG
Rabbit's Claws
Description: Who the hell names their dog Rabbit?
+39 SLASH DMG
Raw Lyrium Spear
Description: Sniffed by templars, it explains all the apostates on the loose.
+39 PIERCE DMG
Chantry Staff
Description: For converting the heathens.
+50 CRUSH DMG
Large Fish
Description: Oghren never got around to lye it.
+41 CRUSH DMG
Whiskers Whip
Description: A whip made from zombie kitten whiskers.
+39 SLASH DMG
Writer's Spear
Description: For those nights when you wish you could harm trolls.
+43 PIERCE DMG
Old Spice Guy's Scarf
Description: "Hello ladies."
+50 HOLY DMG
Nug Bombs
Description: Trapped inside is a highly-flammable Nug.
+200 FIRE DMG
And a few more that I won't list... Varric-centric weapons that were outdated when we found out about Bianca.
Armor List
The huge variance in defense is, like the weapons, mostly because of stats and how it could absorb some damage types more than others.
Varric's Jacket
Description: Exposes one's chest to the delight (or horror) of all.
+5 DEF
Donut Necklace
Description: A gift from Varric's deceased aunt, it's dime-a-dozen.
Tethras Signet Ring
Description: Holds the crest of House Tethras.
+1 DEF
Leather Shield
Description: Smells like Antiva.
+2 DEF
Wooden Shield
Description: Slightly better than the Leather Shield.
+4 DEF
Summer Shield
Description: Guards against fire attacks and sunburns.
+4 DEF
Shield in Winter
Description: Grants protection against ice attacks. Better not lick it.
+4 DEF
Lyrium Shield
Description: It's lyrium, it only does EVERYTHING.
+7 DEF
Nug Shield
Description: A shield made from nug flesh. Disgusting.
+9 DEF
Fashionable Hat
Description: Gives -/+ 100 approval to any companion in Varric Age 7.
+3 DEF
Chain Coif
Description: Gives you a bad hairday.
+6 DEF
Redcliffe Helm
Description: The helmet of Furnley the Insane, a knight driven insane by Arlessa Isolde's constant asking of who he was.
+10 DEF
Chantry Circlet
Description: The symbol of the Chantry adorns the circlet. It's pretty.
+8 DEF
Lyrium Helm
Description: Might cause addiction if licked.
+16 DEF
Nug Helm
Description: A dozen of Nugs were killed to make this helmet. Let their sacrifice not be in vain, brave hero.
+12 DEF
Circle Robe
Description: A "HELLO TEMPLARS, COME GET ME" sign across all of Thedas for apostates.
Leather Armor
Description: The armor for all newbie hero companions.
+5 DEF
Mail Armor
Description: Mail call.
+7 DEF
Enchanter's Robe
Description: Enchantment?
+6 DEF
Templar's Breastplate
Description: Extremely fashionable.
+12 DEF
N7 ARMOR
Description: Oops wrong game series.
+17 DEF
Blood Mage Robe
Description: Covered in blood, nobody will know this is a Blood Mage's robe.
+10 DEF
Hot Ring
Description: Makes you attractive.
Cold Ring
Description: Can't defrost this ice queen.
Gaider's Gauntlet
Description: Belonging to the lead writer, it grants double XP.
Dwarven Earrings
Description: Makes you better at telling stories, making you immune to silence.
Grey Warden's Oath
Description: Makes you immune to the taint and critical strikes.
Fairy Shoes
Description: Big enough to cover a toe or two, increasing agility.
Nutella Ring
Description: Smears you in Nutella, recovering some health overtime.
Ring of Understanding
Description: Halves MP cost at the cost of understanding forum trolls.
Plot Armor
Description: Varric only. "I'm in the sequel!"
Modifié par Dave of Canada, 03 février 2011 - 09:30 .
#12854
Posté 03 février 2011 - 10:48
Maria Caliban
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*looks at Dave's post*
I'm not even sure what this is.
I'm not even sure what this is.
#12855
Posté 03 février 2011 - 10:54
Ser Fish
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In reference to Aimo's animation: Why does Varric leave his gloves on? And why did I notice that when there are far more important things to notice? (Like why doesn't Hawke keep that damn mutt on a leash?)
And Dave: I mourn that we shall never see LoV completed. It sounds so good!
And Dave: I mourn that we shall never see LoV completed. It sounds so good!
#12856
Posté 03 février 2011 - 11:00
namedforthemoon
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Looks awesome, Dave! It would have been fun. Maybe someday, you'll pick it back up and finish it. 
Modifié par namedforthemoon, 03 février 2011 - 11:00 .
#12857
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:01
Apollo Starflare
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Maria Caliban wrote...
*looks at Dave's post*
I'm not even sure what this is.
In case you missed it, Dave was making a working Varric RPG at one point but sadly had to abandon it a while back, the Legend of Varric posts are what would have been in the game.
@Mr Canada: I really hope you find the time to complete it as it was meant to be some day Dave, you've got a great imagination.
#12858
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:25
Anarya
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Ser Fish wrote...
In reference to Aimo's animation: Why does Varric leave his gloves on? And why did I notice that when there are far more important things to notice? (Like why doesn't Hawke keep that damn mutt on a leash?)
And Dave: I mourn that we shall never see LoV completed. It sounds so good!
So he can pull them off sensually while walking toward the viewer, completing his stripping?
Also the L in LH stands for Leandra. Mom interrupt!
#12859
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:27
Pseudo the Mustachioed
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Anarya wrote...
Ser Fish wrote...
In reference to Aimo's animation: Why does Varric leave his gloves on? And why did I notice that when there are far more important things to notice? (Like why doesn't Hawke keep that damn mutt on a leash?)
And Dave: I mourn that we shall never see LoV completed. It sounds so good!
So he can pull them off sensually while walking toward the viewer, completing his stripping?
Also the L in LH stands for Leandra. Mom interrupt!
#12860
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:29
Xewaka
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It's the gentle caress of the antivan leather against her skin.Pseudocognition wrote...
Anarya wrote...
So he can pull them off sensually while walking toward the viewer, completing his stripping?Ser Fish wrote...
In reference to Aimo's animation: Why does Varric leave his gloves on? And why did I notice that when there are far more important things to notice? (Like why doesn't Hawke keep that damn mutt on a leash?)
And Dave: I mourn that we shall never see LoV completed. It sounds so good!
Also the L in LH stands for Leandra. Mom interrupt!CassandraHawke likes it with the gloves on.
Modifié par Xewaka, 03 février 2011 - 02:33 .
#12861
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:29
Anarya
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<--She's glaring at you, Pseudo. I think that look says it all.
#12862
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:32
Shepard Lives
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Anarya wrote...
<--She's glaring at you, Pseudo. I think that look says it all.
Someone needs to make a "Cassandra is not amused" pic.
#12863
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:46
JediHealerCosmin
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Shepard Lives wrote...
Anarya wrote...
<--She's glaring at you, Pseudo. I think that look says it all.
Someone needs to make a "Cassandra is not amused" pic.
There will be quite a few of them after we our hands on the game
#12864
Posté 03 février 2011 - 02:49
DiosMios
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Isn't every picture Cassandra's in a "Cassandra is not ammused" pic?
#12865
Posté 03 février 2011 - 04:19
GameBoyish
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dave you and your epic wall of texts. nevar change!
Too bad LoV wouldn't be done in time... But one day... during a DA secret santa... you will gift it to us!!!
Too bad LoV wouldn't be done in time... But one day... during a DA secret santa... you will gift it to us!!!
#12866
Posté 03 février 2011 - 05:19
Nova-FoV
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Woooooow. I applaud you, sir, for your work. Also, I was rather amused by the fact that the writers were the villains. XD
#12867
Posté 03 février 2011 - 05:44
Pseudo the Mustachioed
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Anarya wrote...
<--She's glaring at you, Pseudo. I think that look says it all.
I'm sorry, Cass. I'll never strikethrough your name again... so long as I can borrow your armor to do presentations in.
#12868
Posté 03 février 2011 - 05:56
nightcobra
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lol, no matter how much i wrap my head around it, it's still strange to hear that the feminine version of my name is mama hawke's name.
back on topic i could see cassandra befriending varric....under the right circumstances:whistle:
back on topic i could see cassandra befriending varric....under the right circumstances:whistle:
Modifié par nightcobra8928, 03 février 2011 - 05:56 .
#12869
Posté 03 février 2011 - 06:10
lv12medic
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I love the weapon and armor descriptions in the Legend of Varric.
#12870
Posté 03 février 2011 - 09:37
Patriciachr34
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It looks like we will get a taste of Varric on February 22nd for those of us who opt to play the demo. I really want to squee, but am too stressed from work. So, one of y'all will have to squee for me.
#12871
Posté 03 février 2011 - 09:39
Anarya
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Pseudocognition wrote...
Anarya wrote...
<--She's glaring at you, Pseudo. I think that look says it all.
I'm sorry, Cass. I'll never strikethrough your name again... so long as I can borrow your armor to do presentations in.
FU Pseudo I've got dibs.
#12872
Posté 03 février 2011 - 10:04
Ser Fish
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nightcobra8928 wrote...
lol, no matter how much i wrap my head around it, it's still strange to hear that the feminine version of my name is mama hawke's name.
I had a similar problem with Ser Cauthrien. Except of course I'm female as well. Is it supposed to be like Catherine? Or not? *shakes fist at Ser Cauthrien* STOP TAUNTING ME!
#12874
Posté 04 février 2011 - 12:59
Dave of Canada
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That Rock Wraith has World of Warcraft sized shoulderpads, we just need to shrink down the rest of it's body to human size and it would be nearly identical!
#12875
Posté 04 février 2011 - 12:59
lv12medic
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yukidama wrote...
Widdle Varric AWWW.
Is he kneeling on one knee? Or stepping back? Ah well, Varric and Bethany are the smart ones.
And, I see Isabela's jewlery is her downfall. Gold is a REALLY good conductor of electricity.
*edit* And ouch... from that angle... it looks like the electicity is arcing into the jewlery, out the left breast, back into the left buttock, and out the left thigh. *end edit*
***Though, I suppose it could just be the angle and the arcing is just dancing around the rock wraith thing*****
Modifié par lv12medic, 04 février 2011 - 01:04 .
