From what I gather, the 'whiny' comment was mostly due to his Paragon attitude (similar to Carth Onasi), the general dislike over Raphael Sbarge's voice (which is his natural voice and imho, masculine and sexy). He wasn't afraid to voice his disapproval whenever Shepard step over the line. In a game where you're allowed to do good and bad things, gamers want the fantasy to do bad things without overthinking the consequences, they don't need a seemingly beta-character to question your badass alpha's actions. But I've played as mixed morality character and he's surprisingly okay with a lot of Renegade kills that I considered too coldhearted like killing Rana Thanoptis. Then again, this is the guy who seduced his boss when he know fully well of the risk of being court-martialed.
What he's really good at was hiding his Renegade side. Many responded badly to his ME2's reaction on Horizon because they expected Paragon Kaidan to see them and say nice things because Shepard is always right and he shouldn't question them (^deja vu) and they didn't expect a very angry Commander Alenko. He contrasted with Ashley who is perceived as a Renegade and despite sharing almost exact same lines (Ashley's and Kaidan's), it didn't seem out of character for her but to most, it is with Kaidan. Then the cheating and Cerberus issues in ME3. Players felt like they're betrayed by Kaidan because they can't handle this side of him and all of these complicated feelings and character issues rounded up to "Kaidan being whiny and I hate him" type of responses. Its more impressive that Sbarge could elicit extreme reactions after a few minutes cameo in a lengthy game.
Ultimately, the best part of Kaidan in ME3 was watching him trying to fix his relationship with a heartbroken Shepard. Then again, like all LIs, all romance adds depth to these characters.
Ah, I see. I guess that must be the reason why he never rubbed me the wrong way. I always roleplay Shepard, regardless of gender, as Paragon. Though I can see the appeal of a Renegade Shep, it's not really for me (some of the decisions, especially in ME3, are so brutal that I personally can't really stomach them). And then there's the fact that Shepard is promoted as an icon, a representation of humanity's finest qualities, which, politically speaking, means better chances for humanity to get a Council seat. For me, Kaidan is someone who has a grasp of politics (it's actually pointed out if you play as F!Shepard) and so, in a way, he realises what's at stake and thus he looks out for Shepard (whether as a friend or a lover) so that this rare chance doesn't get botched.
That brings us to ME2. Whether you played as Paragon or Renegade, you did fight Cerberus in the previous game. If you look at it from his POV, here's someone that he cared about, whom he helped fight Cerberus in the previous game, only to now see them working for them. That becomes more evident if, as a Paragon, Shepard believed in peaceful co-existence between aliens and humans, and now they're working with a terrorist group that believes that humanity should come first. That's such a sharp contrast that it can easily overwhelm anybody - and I'm not adding the fact that Shepard had been considered dead for 2 years in the equation. The Shepard that Kaidan encounters in Horizon isn't the Shepard that he remembered and mourned. Personally, I can't blame him for reacting how he did, and that's why I don't mind having Shepard reassure him through their actions that they didn't change as much as he fears.
And like you said, trying to work things out in 3 adds a lot more depth. ![]()





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