I should be in this more.
Story Time: I Feel Fabulous
Débuté par
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
, nov. 29 2010 04:48
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#52
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Posté 03 décembre 2010 - 07:09
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
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Chapter Twelve: Shawty Fire Burnin on the Dance Floor
Finally only1sgop and his kitteh kat had reached the Sparkle Sparkle Caves. The minerals and various crystals in the caverns produced their own natral light. Thus illuminating the caves in a colorful spectical of lighting. only1sgop was bedazzled by the display, that the voice that angered at him caught him off gaurd.
Korpuls: ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH THAT?
only1sgop: I beg your pardon?
Korpuls: ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH THAT!
only1sgop: What are you talking about?
Korpuls: THANKS!
The meaty human grabbed only1sgop's kitteh, he snapped it's neck and then swallowed it down hole.
only1sgop: What the hell! You ate me kat man!
Korpuls then ran away, going deep down into a maze of caves and caverns.
only1sgop frowned, perhaps Eli was right maybe he wasn't made out to be a adventurer. He was about ready to turn around and leave until he came up with an idea!
only1sgop: *raises wooden sword high in air* Just wait till I inform the Dwarven King!
The middle aged elf ran screaming down to the hall to the royal Kings chambers, inside funk was going down! On the throne was PureMethodActor, he was the King as King. He liked to throw wild parties with his twelve sons, but he was angry cause he sons were not there for his party.
PureMethodActor: Like helloooooooooooooooooooo groopies! *throws sparkle dust* How ya all swinging? Yeah ready to party in this love shack, till the solar equilibrium makes us all wheezy and passedout? *throws sparkle dust*
All the dwarves began to dance, one by one they all began to trip over their beards.
PureMethodActor: Lets break this funk down! *pelvis thrusts* Let the gayness begin!
And then everybody was really happy! PureMethodActor and his subjects began to dance on teh dance floor.
PureMethodActor: *sparkledust/pelvis thrust*
PureMethodActor began to grind up against a attractive female.
PureMethodActor: Hey babe, the constilations are totally aligning, wana dance.
Female Dwarf: No thanks I'm already married.
Suddenly from out of nowhere a wooden sword hit PureMethodActor (PMA) in the head! The danceing stopped as everyone scowled in the direction it was tossed. Cowering in the corner was only1sgop. PMA grabbed his axe and slowly hobbled over there using his peg legs.
PMA: What is the meaning of this, boy?
only1sgop: Korpuls ate-
PMA: Yo like i'm totally trippen here! These farout vibes of hate immenating from your aura are ruining my party shack bro! *throws sparkle sust*
only1sgop: What-
PMA: I'm going to murder you! *raises axe high in air*
onlysgop: No please don't-
PMA: Anything eh? *dirty grin* Good bend over and pull down your pants!
only1sgop: Ahhh the flash backs!
PMA: I'm kidding. Like I need you to diliver this letter to that square of a King dark-lauron for me. That square has ruined my sons' lives and he must suffar!
only1sgop: Can I get a escort?
PMA: Sure I will send Korpuls along with you, along with a supply of live cats. Just so he dosn't get tempted to eat you.
only1sgop: But-
PMA: Farout man, that's really groovy! *pushes only1sgop out of Royal Chambers and locks door* Now lets PARTY! *throws sparkle sust*
Finally only1sgop and his kitteh kat had reached the Sparkle Sparkle Caves. The minerals and various crystals in the caverns produced their own natral light. Thus illuminating the caves in a colorful spectical of lighting. only1sgop was bedazzled by the display, that the voice that angered at him caught him off gaurd.
Korpuls: ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH THAT?
only1sgop: I beg your pardon?
Korpuls: ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH THAT!
only1sgop: What are you talking about?
Korpuls: THANKS!
The meaty human grabbed only1sgop's kitteh, he snapped it's neck and then swallowed it down hole.
only1sgop: What the hell! You ate me kat man!
Korpuls then ran away, going deep down into a maze of caves and caverns.
only1sgop frowned, perhaps Eli was right maybe he wasn't made out to be a adventurer. He was about ready to turn around and leave until he came up with an idea!
only1sgop: *raises wooden sword high in air* Just wait till I inform the Dwarven King!
The middle aged elf ran screaming down to the hall to the royal Kings chambers, inside funk was going down! On the throne was PureMethodActor, he was the King as King. He liked to throw wild parties with his twelve sons, but he was angry cause he sons were not there for his party.
PureMethodActor: Like helloooooooooooooooooooo groopies! *throws sparkle dust* How ya all swinging? Yeah ready to party in this love shack, till the solar equilibrium makes us all wheezy and passedout? *throws sparkle dust*
All the dwarves began to dance, one by one they all began to trip over their beards.
PureMethodActor: Lets break this funk down! *pelvis thrusts* Let the gayness begin!
And then everybody was really happy! PureMethodActor and his subjects began to dance on teh dance floor.
PureMethodActor: *sparkledust/pelvis thrust*
PureMethodActor began to grind up against a attractive female.
PureMethodActor: Hey babe, the constilations are totally aligning, wana dance.
Female Dwarf: No thanks I'm already married.
Suddenly from out of nowhere a wooden sword hit PureMethodActor (PMA) in the head! The danceing stopped as everyone scowled in the direction it was tossed. Cowering in the corner was only1sgop. PMA grabbed his axe and slowly hobbled over there using his peg legs.
PMA: What is the meaning of this, boy?
only1sgop: Korpuls ate-
PMA: Yo like i'm totally trippen here! These farout vibes of hate immenating from your aura are ruining my party shack bro! *throws sparkle sust*
only1sgop: What-
PMA: I'm going to murder you! *raises axe high in air*
onlysgop: No please don't-
PMA: Anything eh? *dirty grin* Good bend over and pull down your pants!
only1sgop: Ahhh the flash backs!
PMA: I'm kidding. Like I need you to diliver this letter to that square of a King dark-lauron for me. That square has ruined my sons' lives and he must suffar!
only1sgop: Can I get a escort?
PMA: Sure I will send Korpuls along with you, along with a supply of live cats. Just so he dosn't get tempted to eat you.
only1sgop: But-
PMA: Farout man, that's really groovy! *pushes only1sgop out of Royal Chambers and locks door* Now lets PARTY! *throws sparkle sust*
Modifié par Captain Cornhole, 03 décembre 2010 - 07:10 .
#54
Posté 04 décembre 2010 - 09:48
Korpuls
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Oh my! Well, I HAVE always liked cats... 
Modifié par Korpuls, 04 décembre 2010 - 09:49 .
#55
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 03:17
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Chapter Thirteen: Audience with dark-lauron
After a long, long hike only1sgop and Korpuls had made it to the human capital city. Each of them looked up at the towering limestone castle where dark-lauron lived. only1sgop looked cautiosly behind him and Korpuls took a bite out of another cat. They approched the gatehouse, there a lone gaurd stood watch.
bobobo879: Get out of here! We don't serve your kind?
Korpuls: But *takes bite out of cat* I'm human.
bobobo879: For all I know you two could be dating!
Korpuls and only1sgop both looked at each other and shuddered.
bobobo879: And I am understrict orders from the King not to allow any elves, dwarves, wizards, or unicorns into the city center.
only1sgop: Please sir, I have a very important letter for the king. You must allow us passage.
bobobo879: So what? You can kill him through millions of tiny paper cuts? I think not you sick bastard.
only1sgop: *whispering to Korpuls* We need a plan to get past this guy.
Korpuls: *whispering to only1sgop* More cats?
bobobo879: You know I can here everything your saying. You won't be able to get past me, I'm invincible.
Korpuls: You humans are all the same, racist.
bobobo: I think you should know that those words hurt deaply *sniffle*. You jerk.
Korpuls: I have had enough of your snide incinuations! *blugeon*
Korpuls' flying fist of fury knocked bobobo onto the ground his spear and helmet went flying behind him. He rubbed his head and squeezed out a fart.
Korpuls: C'mon lets go.
only1sgop: Yay! I can finally get some fame by dilivering this letter.
The two skipped through the gatehouse, and headed towards the castle in the center of the city.
bobobo: Oi! Get back here!
Up in the castle all was not well...
Twelve dwarven sons were chained and shackled together up in dark-lauron's bathroom. They were at work cleaning the barnacles off dark-lauron's feet while he bathed with mousestalker in the royal bath.
Dwarf: Please sir, we have been working all day, we are starving and exhausted. Can we have 12 pairs of socks so our feet won't become cold when you lock us in the ice box again?
dark-lauron: *pulls out whip* Work harder! Those baracles won't scrub themselves! *begins to whip dwarves*
mousestalker: *giggles* Now this is how I invisioned our romantic meetings together. But isn't it a little risky what if Gema catches us?
dark-lauron: Hmmm having an afair in the presence of twelve kidnapped dwarves. Heavy risk but the PRIZE!
Suddenly there was a knock on the door.
dark-lauron: ZOMG EVERYBODY HIDE!
The King quickly stuffed all the dwarves and mousestalker into the tub, he rapped a towl around his waist and answered. It was Timeless Winter, who was the court jester.
Timeless Winter: Please sir can you spare me some muney?
dark-lauron: *scows* Why? I already pay you in lap dances.
Timeless Winter: Well okay. But the real reason for my visit is that my period has started and I need to take a bath.
dark-lauron: No.
Timeless Winter: Thankyou!
He pushed dark-lauron aside and ran towards the restroom. dark-lauron heard a girly scream. He slowly crept into the restroom and saw Timeless Winter trying to crawl into the tub filled with the dwarves and Mousestalker.
Timeless Winter: Boobies!
Mousestalker: Get away from me.
Then Timeless Winter relized what deep dirty secret dark-lauron was hiding in the restroom. Winter turned to the King who was facepalming at the discovery of his secret.
dark-lauron: Listen I know how this looks...
Timeless Winter: You should be ashamed of yourself! These dwarves would be much better working at a cotton plantation.
dark-lauron: Uhhhhh.
Gemaphrodite: Hunny I'm back.
dark-lauron's eyes widened, what would Gem think if she saw the twelve dwarves, mousestalker, Timeless Winter and him only in a towel.
dark-lauron: Everybody stay here!
Timeless Winter: *smiles and looks at mousestalker*
dark-lauron waddled out and over to the royal bed, he sat next to Gemaphrodite and gave her a kiss.
dark-lauron: How was your trip babe?
Gemaphrodite: Ugh, sometimes I really hate being a Queen. Cause all your subjects want to pet you and hold your hand while your out in public.
dark-lauron: Did you buy anything?
Gemaphrodite: Oh yes, an entire wagon load of clothes. But as I said I feel really dirty from being touched by weird people. I'm going to clean off in the bath.
dark-lauron: Wait don't do that!
Gem: Why?
dark-lauron: Because......uhhhhhh.....I like turtles.....and they are living in the bath tub.....cause there my pets.......and the bath tub is now there natral habitat.
Mousestalker: Keep your hands off me you pervert!
Timeless Winter: *drools*
Gem: Uhh, what was that?
dark-lauron: What was wut?
Gem: That noise, it sounded like it came from the restroom.
dark-lauron: Well what ever you do don't get up and investigate.
That is exactly what Gemaphrodite did, she walked in and saw Timeless Winter, Mousestalker and 12 dwarves in the bath tub together.
Gemaphrodite: Can you explain this! >
dark-lauron: Awwww, looky babe my turtles have fully matured! And have grown into......uhh. dwarves! Yeah. That's what happened.
Then suddenly only1sgop and Korpuls exploded into the room, bobobo the gaurd was right behind them.
bobobo: Halt evil do-ers!
only1sgop: Mr. King we have a letter for you!
Korpuls: Eat cats!
Gemaphrodite: Eww a elf! Get him away from me he's going to look up my dress.
Gem quickly forgot about the mess in the tub and hopped onto a stool as the elf and cat eating human approched. But bobobo came up behind them and tackled them to the ground. As Korpuls, bobobo and only1sgop wrastled the King picked up the dropped letter and opened it.
As he read it he frowned even more. He frowned so much he crapped his pants. Gemaphrodite was concered about her husbands well being.
Gem: Whats the problem hunny.
dark-lauron: The Dwarven King, PureMethodActor has falsely accused me of kidnapping his sons!
Everyone then stared at the dwarves.
Timeless Winter: So your saying, your house can fly?
only1sgop: No, he is saying those arn't turtles.
Timeless Winter: Ohhhhhh, I don't get it.
dark-lauron: *raises hand high into air* This means WAR!
only1sgop: Can I watch?
Gem: No.
only1sgop: But I am a skilled sword fighter!
dark-lauron: No.
only1sgop: :'(
dark-lauron: Oh and because all of you guys creep me out, you are so totally banished.
bobobo, only1sgop, and Korpuls: *gasp*
Gem: *points and laughs* Ha ha.
dark-lauron: Quickly, someone fetch me my warrior moomoo!
After a long, long hike only1sgop and Korpuls had made it to the human capital city. Each of them looked up at the towering limestone castle where dark-lauron lived. only1sgop looked cautiosly behind him and Korpuls took a bite out of another cat. They approched the gatehouse, there a lone gaurd stood watch.
bobobo879: Get out of here! We don't serve your kind?
Korpuls: But *takes bite out of cat* I'm human.
bobobo879: For all I know you two could be dating!
Korpuls and only1sgop both looked at each other and shuddered.
bobobo879: And I am understrict orders from the King not to allow any elves, dwarves, wizards, or unicorns into the city center.
only1sgop: Please sir, I have a very important letter for the king. You must allow us passage.
bobobo879: So what? You can kill him through millions of tiny paper cuts? I think not you sick bastard.
only1sgop: *whispering to Korpuls* We need a plan to get past this guy.
Korpuls: *whispering to only1sgop* More cats?
bobobo879: You know I can here everything your saying. You won't be able to get past me, I'm invincible.
Korpuls: You humans are all the same, racist.
bobobo: I think you should know that those words hurt deaply *sniffle*. You jerk.
Korpuls: I have had enough of your snide incinuations! *blugeon*
Korpuls' flying fist of fury knocked bobobo onto the ground his spear and helmet went flying behind him. He rubbed his head and squeezed out a fart.
Korpuls: C'mon lets go.
only1sgop: Yay! I can finally get some fame by dilivering this letter.
The two skipped through the gatehouse, and headed towards the castle in the center of the city.
bobobo: Oi! Get back here!
Up in the castle all was not well...
Twelve dwarven sons were chained and shackled together up in dark-lauron's bathroom. They were at work cleaning the barnacles off dark-lauron's feet while he bathed with mousestalker in the royal bath.
Dwarf: Please sir, we have been working all day, we are starving and exhausted. Can we have 12 pairs of socks so our feet won't become cold when you lock us in the ice box again?
dark-lauron: *pulls out whip* Work harder! Those baracles won't scrub themselves! *begins to whip dwarves*
mousestalker: *giggles* Now this is how I invisioned our romantic meetings together. But isn't it a little risky what if Gema catches us?
dark-lauron: Hmmm having an afair in the presence of twelve kidnapped dwarves. Heavy risk but the PRIZE!
Suddenly there was a knock on the door.
dark-lauron: ZOMG EVERYBODY HIDE!
The King quickly stuffed all the dwarves and mousestalker into the tub, he rapped a towl around his waist and answered. It was Timeless Winter, who was the court jester.
Timeless Winter: Please sir can you spare me some muney?
dark-lauron: *scows* Why? I already pay you in lap dances.
Timeless Winter: Well okay. But the real reason for my visit is that my period has started and I need to take a bath.
dark-lauron: No.
Timeless Winter: Thankyou!
He pushed dark-lauron aside and ran towards the restroom. dark-lauron heard a girly scream. He slowly crept into the restroom and saw Timeless Winter trying to crawl into the tub filled with the dwarves and Mousestalker.
Timeless Winter: Boobies!
Mousestalker: Get away from me.
Then Timeless Winter relized what deep dirty secret dark-lauron was hiding in the restroom. Winter turned to the King who was facepalming at the discovery of his secret.
dark-lauron: Listen I know how this looks...
Timeless Winter: You should be ashamed of yourself! These dwarves would be much better working at a cotton plantation.
dark-lauron: Uhhhhh.
Gemaphrodite: Hunny I'm back.
dark-lauron's eyes widened, what would Gem think if she saw the twelve dwarves, mousestalker, Timeless Winter and him only in a towel.
dark-lauron: Everybody stay here!
Timeless Winter: *smiles and looks at mousestalker*
dark-lauron waddled out and over to the royal bed, he sat next to Gemaphrodite and gave her a kiss.
dark-lauron: How was your trip babe?
Gemaphrodite: Ugh, sometimes I really hate being a Queen. Cause all your subjects want to pet you and hold your hand while your out in public.
dark-lauron: Did you buy anything?
Gemaphrodite: Oh yes, an entire wagon load of clothes. But as I said I feel really dirty from being touched by weird people. I'm going to clean off in the bath.
dark-lauron: Wait don't do that!
Gem: Why?
dark-lauron: Because......uhhhhhh.....I like turtles.....and they are living in the bath tub.....cause there my pets.......and the bath tub is now there natral habitat.
Mousestalker: Keep your hands off me you pervert!
Timeless Winter: *drools*
Gem: Uhh, what was that?
dark-lauron: What was wut?
Gem: That noise, it sounded like it came from the restroom.
dark-lauron: Well what ever you do don't get up and investigate.
That is exactly what Gemaphrodite did, she walked in and saw Timeless Winter, Mousestalker and 12 dwarves in the bath tub together.
Gemaphrodite: Can you explain this! >
dark-lauron: Awwww, looky babe my turtles have fully matured! And have grown into......uhh. dwarves! Yeah. That's what happened.
Then suddenly only1sgop and Korpuls exploded into the room, bobobo the gaurd was right behind them.
bobobo: Halt evil do-ers!
only1sgop: Mr. King we have a letter for you!
Korpuls: Eat cats!
Gemaphrodite: Eww a elf! Get him away from me he's going to look up my dress.
Gem quickly forgot about the mess in the tub and hopped onto a stool as the elf and cat eating human approched. But bobobo came up behind them and tackled them to the ground. As Korpuls, bobobo and only1sgop wrastled the King picked up the dropped letter and opened it.
As he read it he frowned even more. He frowned so much he crapped his pants. Gemaphrodite was concered about her husbands well being.
Gem: Whats the problem hunny.
dark-lauron: The Dwarven King, PureMethodActor has falsely accused me of kidnapping his sons!
Everyone then stared at the dwarves.
Timeless Winter: So your saying, your house can fly?
only1sgop: No, he is saying those arn't turtles.
Timeless Winter: Ohhhhhh, I don't get it.
dark-lauron: *raises hand high into air* This means WAR!
only1sgop: Can I watch?
Gem: No.
only1sgop: But I am a skilled sword fighter!
dark-lauron: No.
only1sgop: :'(
dark-lauron: Oh and because all of you guys creep me out, you are so totally banished.
bobobo, only1sgop, and Korpuls: *gasp*
Gem: *points and laughs* Ha ha.
dark-lauron: Quickly, someone fetch me my warrior moomoo!
Modifié par Captain Cornhole, 05 décembre 2010 - 03:18 .
#56
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 03:56
Ponce de Leon
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Awesomesauceandchipswithsomeextrasauce!!! 
#57
Guest_Gnas_*
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 07:27
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Where is this going? And can we go any faster? LMAO
#58
Guest_Capt. Obvious_*
Posté 05 décembre 2010 - 10:40
Guest_Capt. Obvious_*
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Capt. Obvious. Put me.
#59
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 08:16
Ponce de Leon
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That's a bit late, isn't itCapt. Obvious wrote...
Capt. Obvious. Put me.
#60
Guest_AwesomeName_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 08:34
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Lol, what in the pink floyd is this train wreck?
#61
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 03:43
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
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Chapter Fourteen: Vengence
Gaurdsman slowly woke up, and much to his suprise he was not dead nor hand smelly pants. His vision was blurred but he was slowly able to make out his surroundings. He looked up at the blue sky and the sun that peirced down through the forresr canopy and and into his eyes. Peirced almost like how a box of tissue paper is thrown from the dashboard of a car when it crashes into a oncoming car at speeds of 26,000 miles per hour. Thus sending the said mentioned tissue box hurtling towards you, the passanger, at terrifying speeds of three. Then you have only a fraction of a second to realize that this tissue bow is going to hit you and there is nothing you can do about it. Then you feel the sharp pain as the object slices open your stomach as it continues through the seat finally ending up the back of the car or in another passanger's stomach provided there are others with you. Suddenly your entrails and body matter fall out of your stomach and onto your lap. As you try to push them back it a pool of blood forms around your seat. You feel a chilling bone numbing cold, then you die.
He slowly got up, behind him was a crazy old wizard with a really long beard!
C9: Ehh, hee hee, let the power of cats flow through you!
He revealed a cat from his beard and grabbing it by the tail he slugged Gaurdsman in the face.
Cat: MEOW!
Gaurdsman: Cut that out, why am I not dead.
C9: Hee hee hee, there is still work that is left unfinished, evil not yet defeated. You must make it happen, bountyhunter. Only will you be able to do so through the virtue of-
Gaurdsman: I have had enough of you soild waste excreations! *graps sword and stabs C9*
C9: Hee hee hee, I warned you. You have made a very powerless enemy!
Then he exploded in the usual plume of smoke and fire.
Gaurdsman decided to forget about that weird incident and hunt down his nemesis,
Darthnemesis2. Using his vast knowledge of dog years he sniffed down Darthnemesis2's secret hideout.
It was no supprise, that Darthnemesis2's secret hideout was a dog kennel! It was a wooden structure and full of dogs and lice and dog poop and lice poop. The bad news was Gaurdsman was allergic to dogs, he stood infront of the building and wondered what to do.
Darthnemesis2: *opens window and laughs* Mah hah hah, you will never be able to enter my dog shack bro! I have locked all the doors, furthermore all the doors are made of dog hair. And soon my evil cultist plans will be so complete that even you cannot stop me!
Gaurdsman: You have never explained what your plan is anyhow.
Darthnemesis2: Ah yes your right, so using the Jewels from the King's stolen crown I will be able to combine my body with that of a dog! Then my childhood fantasy of becoming half man, half dog will be complete. After that I will go on to become awarded best of house at the Dog Show this coming thursday! And not even- hey what are you doing?
Gaurdsman smiled as he lit the building on fire, the walls and doors quickly caught flame as the fire spread.
Gaurdsman: Kill it with fire!
Darthnemesis2: Gaurds, get out there and stop him!
Gaurd: We can't the doors are lock.
Darthnemesis2: Oh that's right....so they are..........
Gaurdsman patted himself on the back and walked off as the building fell ablaze. Off in the distance he could here the sounds of dogs being cooked alive.
Darthnemesis2: Quickly Mr. Poodles get out of here!
He tried to coax his dog over to the window but as the flames rose it's puffy fir caught on fire, it rolled around in a pathetic attempt to extinguish it's self. Then puss exploded out of it's body as the heat rose, it's barks of pain and torment brought arm sweat to Darthnemesis2's butt cheeks
It was glorious, all the dogs and the cultist were cooked alive in a hellish inferno. He was almost finished there was one more person to hunt down Joshd21
Gaurdsman slowly woke up, and much to his suprise he was not dead nor hand smelly pants. His vision was blurred but he was slowly able to make out his surroundings. He looked up at the blue sky and the sun that peirced down through the forresr canopy and and into his eyes. Peirced almost like how a box of tissue paper is thrown from the dashboard of a car when it crashes into a oncoming car at speeds of 26,000 miles per hour. Thus sending the said mentioned tissue box hurtling towards you, the passanger, at terrifying speeds of three. Then you have only a fraction of a second to realize that this tissue bow is going to hit you and there is nothing you can do about it. Then you feel the sharp pain as the object slices open your stomach as it continues through the seat finally ending up the back of the car or in another passanger's stomach provided there are others with you. Suddenly your entrails and body matter fall out of your stomach and onto your lap. As you try to push them back it a pool of blood forms around your seat. You feel a chilling bone numbing cold, then you die.
He slowly got up, behind him was a crazy old wizard with a really long beard!
C9: Ehh, hee hee, let the power of cats flow through you!
He revealed a cat from his beard and grabbing it by the tail he slugged Gaurdsman in the face.
Cat: MEOW!
Gaurdsman: Cut that out, why am I not dead.
C9: Hee hee hee, there is still work that is left unfinished, evil not yet defeated. You must make it happen, bountyhunter. Only will you be able to do so through the virtue of-
Gaurdsman: I have had enough of you soild waste excreations! *graps sword and stabs C9*
C9: Hee hee hee, I warned you. You have made a very powerless enemy!
Then he exploded in the usual plume of smoke and fire.
Gaurdsman decided to forget about that weird incident and hunt down his nemesis,
Darthnemesis2. Using his vast knowledge of dog years he sniffed down Darthnemesis2's secret hideout.
It was no supprise, that Darthnemesis2's secret hideout was a dog kennel! It was a wooden structure and full of dogs and lice and dog poop and lice poop. The bad news was Gaurdsman was allergic to dogs, he stood infront of the building and wondered what to do.
Darthnemesis2: *opens window and laughs* Mah hah hah, you will never be able to enter my dog shack bro! I have locked all the doors, furthermore all the doors are made of dog hair. And soon my evil cultist plans will be so complete that even you cannot stop me!
Gaurdsman: You have never explained what your plan is anyhow.
Darthnemesis2: Ah yes your right, so using the Jewels from the King's stolen crown I will be able to combine my body with that of a dog! Then my childhood fantasy of becoming half man, half dog will be complete. After that I will go on to become awarded best of house at the Dog Show this coming thursday! And not even- hey what are you doing?
Gaurdsman smiled as he lit the building on fire, the walls and doors quickly caught flame as the fire spread.
Gaurdsman: Kill it with fire!
Darthnemesis2: Gaurds, get out there and stop him!
Gaurd: We can't the doors are lock.
Darthnemesis2: Oh that's right....so they are..........
Gaurdsman patted himself on the back and walked off as the building fell ablaze. Off in the distance he could here the sounds of dogs being cooked alive.
Darthnemesis2: Quickly Mr. Poodles get out of here!
He tried to coax his dog over to the window but as the flames rose it's puffy fir caught on fire, it rolled around in a pathetic attempt to extinguish it's self. Then puss exploded out of it's body as the heat rose, it's barks of pain and torment brought arm sweat to Darthnemesis2's butt cheeks
It was glorious, all the dogs and the cultist were cooked alive in a hellish inferno. He was almost finished there was one more person to hunt down Joshd21
Modifié par Captain Cornhole, 06 décembre 2010 - 03:44 .
#62
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 03:54
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
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- Guests
*is certain Captain takes LSD before writing this story*
#63
Guest_Eli-da-Mage_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 03:57
Guest_Eli-da-Mage_*
Guest_Eli-da-Mage_*
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- Guests
*is certain Gem is supplying Captain with the LSD*Gemaphrodite wrote...
*is certain Captain takes LSD before writing this story*
#64
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 04:01
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
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*shifty eyes*
Modifié par Captain Cornhole, 06 décembre 2010 - 04:05 .
#65
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 04:01
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
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Eli-da-Mage wrote...
*is certain Gem is supplying Captain with the LSD*Gemaphrodite wrote...
*is certain Captain takes LSD before writing this story*
*gasp*
#66
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 04:02
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
Guest_Gemaphrodite_*
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Captain Cornhole wrote...
*is certain that Chris Priestly is a member of a secret society, and is certain Gem got the LSD from Chris*Eli-da-Mage wrote...
*is certain Gem is supplying Captain with the LSD*Gemaphrodite wrote...
*is certain Captain takes LSD before writing this story*
#67
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 05:27
Darthnemesis2
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And I started out so normal too..
I hate dogs.
Oh well, I've always wanted to go out in a blaze of glory... turns out I just got burned alive
I hate dogs.
Oh well, I've always wanted to go out in a blaze of glory... turns out I just got burned alive
#68
Guest_AwesomeName_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 05:33
Guest_AwesomeName_*
Guest_AwesomeName_*
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This whole story is completey awful, so is it wrong that I'm completely jealous I'm not in it?
#69
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 05:35
mousestalker
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At least I'm clean, sort of. 
#70
Guest_Armenian Oracle_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 06:21
Guest_Armenian Oracle_*
Guest_Armenian Oracle_*
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I would hate to think what is in store for me.
#71
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 07:59
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
Guest_Captain Cornhole_*
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Bad news I was about to post a chapter when I realized I forgot to write it. lol So there is going to be a longer wait till the next chapter.
#72
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 08:04
marbatico
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*sniffs* ah, dont you just love the smell of cooked dog in the morning?
#73
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 08:50
Darthnemesis2
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marbatico wrote...
*sniffs* ah, dont you just love the smell of cooked dog in the morning?
Yes
#75
Posté 06 décembre 2010 - 08:59
Darthnemesis2
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@JRCHOharry,
That's how I felt when people were eating cats! :'(
That's how I felt when people were eating cats! :'(
