1554 réponses à ce sujet

[ZachForrest]

or



rough sketches for Garrus and Shepard Hopeless Drunks. Sorry the first looks like Jesus, was accidental.

Modifié par ZachForrest, 01 février 2011 - 10:31 .

[Cra5y Pineapple]

LOL



Hooray for drunk Shepard!

[Fromyou]

challenge: we meet shepards dancing instructor

[ZachForrest]

Shepard Meets His Dancing Instructor

-Alright, Dad?

-Alright, Son?

-Well...You know those dance moves what you taught me?

-Oh yeah. Fightin' them off i bet?

-No. They're right ****ing **** and i look a right wanker.

Modifié par ZachForrest, 02 février 2011 - 01:43 .

[A2N2T]

challenge accepted.



Jacob: Shepard?

Shepard: What do you want?

J: I saw how you dance back on Omega, and there's something that I've been meaning to ask.

S: What is it?

J: Did you take my Richard Simmons vids? 'Cause, I need them to, you know, stay in shape.

S: We're done here.

[ADLegend21]

Fromyou wrote...

challenge: we meet shepards dancing instructor

Challenge ACCEPTED!

*Shepard is watching video of BJ Raji doing his endzone dance*
FShep: you know, that's an awesome dance!

[sporeian]

Shepard: I'd like you all to me my dance instructer... THE TECHNO TURIAN!!!

Techno Turian: SHAKE IT EVERBODY!

*Ship erupts into one enormous party*

*later*

Shepard: *crying* I think I have a hernia! ahhhhhhhhh!



......little bit of hollywood news in there.

[sporeian]

ADLegend21 wrote...

MSparkyPants wrote...

Garrus: GO GO GO!
Tali: ENEMY IS EVERYWHERE!
Shep: FFFF---

Jack: I WILL DESTROY YOU!
Grunt: WATCH OUT!
Legion: *random geth noises*

Shepard: Hot stuff coming through!

[Sandbox47]

Shep: Have you seen the Bioware Social?

Garrus: No, I haven't yet. Why?

Shep: Apparently, the fans have a lot to say about the crew.

Tali: And you?

Shep: What about me?

Miranda: What do they say about you?

Shep: Why wouldn't they like me?

Zaeed: You kill, blow up and trick everyone we meet.

Shep: Your point?

Zaeed: I was complimentin' you.

Shep: Many thanks.

Tali: So there really is no one who dislikes you?

Shep: *shruggs* We don't get many masochistic nerds around here.

________________________________________________________________________________



Tali: Go Chiktikka!

Garrus: Go sniper rifle!

Tali: ???

Garrus: What?

Tali: What do you expect it to do without you?

Garrus: What do you expect your drone to do without you?

Tali: It's rpgrammed to fly about.

Garrus: My rifle's programmed to... eat cows.

Tali: ... Cows?

Garrus: I meant octopusses. It's pretyt much the same, only they move quicker under water.

Tali: what are you talking about?

Garrus: I tried to distract you away from the fact that my rifle isn't actually moving without me.

Tali: *facepalm* Oh Keelah.

[ADLegend21]

Sandbox47 wrote...


Tali: Go Chiktikka!
Garrus: Go sniper rifle!
Tali: ???
Garrus: What?
Tali: What do you expect it to do without you?
Garrus: What do you expect your drone to do without you?
Tali: It's rpgrammed to fly about.
Garrus: My rifle's programmed to... eat cows.
Tali: ... Cows?
Garrus: I meant octopusses. It's pretyt much the same, only they move quicker under water.
Tali: what are you talking about?
Garrus: I tried to distract you away from the fact that my rifle isn't actually moving without me.
Tali: *facepalm* Oh Keelah.

hahah poor Garrus.

[ADLegend21]

Shep: Hey Kasumi, why don't you ever listen to me

Kasumi: Hey I was just thinking about you.

Shep: answer my question.

Kasumi:I'm not sure what to do with myself, not much need for theivery aboard a ship

Shep: *thinks*....I love you Kasumi, I'm so gay for you it's not funny.

Kasumi: Samara told me what you did for her, even someone as hardcore as her couldn't kill her daughter on her own.

Shep: take me now *flashes*

Kasumi: come back later, I'm sure I'll ahvemore to talk about.

Shep: T^T

[ADLegend21]

come on people!



Shep: Hey grunt wanna arm wrestle?

Grunt: you sure bout that Battlemaster,I'd hate to injure you before our big mission.

Shep: yeah, I need topass the time anyway.

Grunt: alright, don't say I didn't warn you *locks hands*

Shep: Ready...set....go *throws Grunt into the wall*

Grunt: @.@

Shep: haha, I still got.

[Fromyou]

Miranda: Jack

Jack: Cerberus cheerleader

Miranda: I love you

Jack: Hot sex

Miranda: Yes

(Both take off their clothes)

Joker: SHEPARD WAKE UP

Shepard: Damnit Joker (punches Joker)

[ADLegend21]

Fromyou wrote...

Miranda: Jack
Jack: Cerberus cheerleader
Miranda: I love you
Jack: Hot sex
Miranda: Yes
(Both take off their clothes)
Joker: SHEPARD WAKE UP
Shepard: Damnit Joker (punches Joker)

I see your dream and raise you this

Joker:SHEPARD WAKE UP!
Shepard: Damnit Joker!
Joker: Make up sex?
Shepard: sure
*Miranda's alarm goes off*
Miranda: Damnit.

[A2N2T]

Shepard: Oh God. Hide me.

Garrus: From what exactly?

Shepard: It's Conrad.

Garrus: Oh no.

Jack: You want us to hide you from HIM? ****, I knew you were a ****.

Shepard: You don't know what it's like. He's relentless. We might not be able to avoid an encounter with him.

Jack: What the hell Shepard? Look, you want him gone? Watch this. (Jack goes up to Conrad)

Garrus: Do you think this is necessary, Shepard?

Shepard: Yes, I do.

(Jack returns)

Shepard: Well?

Jack: He won't be bothering you anymore.

Garrus: What did you do?

Jack: I talked with him.

Garrus: YOU talked to him? You didn't kill him or toss him around some? Wow. Shepard, I think your relationship with her is starting to work.

Jack: **** you, you cat-lizard. And you won't be so surprised in a little bit anyway.

Shepard: Jack, what did you tell Con... ****, he's coming over here. (Hides behind Jack)

Conrad: (To Garrus) Hey!

Garrus: Hey?

Conrad: I hear that you go by Archangel?

Garrus: Jack?!

Conrad: May I have you autograph? Oh, and a picture?

Garrus: Damnit Jack!

[somecthemes]

Shep wakes from a chaotic dream she quickly represses.

Shep: Joker, how far are we from the Omega Relay?

Joker: Just another 15 minutes until we all die, Commander.

Shep: Joker...

Joker: Sorry, Commander, I'm sure you'll live despite all our likely deaths.

Shep: Thanks Jeff.

[Sandbox47]

Shep: We have a difficult mission ahead. We are set out to stop the Reapers from destroying all civilized life in the galaxy. More importantly, we are stopping them from destroying the one thing that matters the most.

Garrus: Our freedom?

Tali: Our families?

Liara: Our children?

Miranda: Our courage?

Kasumi: Our love?

Jack: Us?

Shep: I fear that there is something worse to lose than those things.

Joker: Like what, commander?

Sparrow. Here's a hint. Rum.

*everyone look at Shepard*

Shep: That's right. If we do not stop the Reapers, there will be no more rum left.

Tali* throws her hands up* You cannot be serious even in the face of death, can you?

Sparrow: Death is subjective, doll. I'll grant you that, with these Rapers, I'm sorry, Reaper things death looks a bit more constant than with anything else, but there's still a shot.

________________________________________________________________________________



Joker: Commander, I'm picking up some strange signals from the surface of that planet.

Shep: Is there any gold there?

Joker: ... Sorry?

Shep: Or diamonds. I like both.

Joker: No, I don't know. Look, there are powerful radioactive...

Sparrow: Any silver there lad?

Joker: What? No!

Sparrow: Then why are we still here?

Shep: Up, up and away!

Joker: *into the com* Doc, you'll have to get up here.

________________________________________________________________________________



Chakwas: Have you experienced any stress lately?

Sparrow: To be honest, I have felt a tad-...

Chakwas: Not you. Shepard.

Shep: No. I'm fine, doc.

Chakwas: Have you felt off at all in the past few weeks?

Shep: I said I'm fine.

Chakwas: Joker is worried. Since when did you start being concerned about gold? And why gold of all things?

Shep: You reall want to know?

Chakwas: As you healthcare specialist, I do.

Sparrow: She tried to play Skyllian Five with me and Legion.

Chakwas: And?

Shep: When one of them cheats, millions of credits can suddenly vanish into thin air.

_________________________________________________________________________________



Anderson: I heard that you got rid of the Collector base.

Shep: I'm glad you heard.

Anderson: It's safer this way than letting it get into Cerberus hands.

Shep: That's why I did it.

Anderson: I mean, not that we couldn't have used it to our advantage, but Cerberus would be too destructive in their ends and means.

Shep: ... Is there something you'd like to tell me?

Anderson: ... No.

Shep: Anderson?

Anderson: ... Fine. I bet fifty credits on you to save that base.

Shep: O_O Whom did you bet against?

Anderson: ... Tim.

Shep: Tim... what?

Anderson: The Illusive man.

Shep: He bet on me destroying it?

Anderson: Yes. Everyone here on the Citadel thought that you would keep it for sure. He made quite a lot of money.

Shep: So that's why he's still sending me money...

________________________________________________________________________________



Shep: Garrus, cover me!

Garrus: Pika!

Shep: O_O What did you say?

Garrus: Not now Shepard! We're under fire! There's about a hundred husks running about.

Shep: Did you say "pika"?

Garrus: ... No!

Shep: Why would you say pika? I thought that it was a pokemon thing?

Tali: Bulbasaur! *blasts one of the husks with her shotgun*

Joker: *through the com* You want me to get you out, don't you?

Shep: Yeah, you'd better. Until one of them evolves.

[Iakus]

Legion:  Lietenant Jacob Taylor seems concerned

Jacob:  What's to be concerned about?  We're only gonna try to take on the Collectors on their home turf against unknown odds.

Legion Shepard Commander has been gathering the most capable individuals in the Terminus Systems for this mission.  Defeat is far from certain.

Jacob:  That's just it.  Why am I one of the chosen?  I'm just a guy.  Sure i'm biotic, but compared to Jack or Samara?  Or even Miranda?  I'm not a genetically engineered supersoldier like Grunt.  Or a master assassin like Thane.  I'm just a former Alliance soldier along for the ride.

Legion:  We believe that is not true.  We have studied your record.  Jacob Taylor survived the Heretic attack on Eden Prime when entire units of marines were destroyed.  Jacob Taylor also foiled a batarian plot to assassinate the Council.   And now, you have the initiative to oppose the Reapers when much of the Council or Systems Alliance do not.  You are far from a mere soldier.

Jacob:  Well, I...

Legion:  However, if you should die, it is understandable.  You are, after all, only human.

Jacob:  ...was that a joke?

Legion: Yes.

Jacob:  You've been spending too much time with EDI

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Thane:  I have seen your skills with a sniper LEgion.  Thet are most impressive

Legion:  We thank you, Thane Krios.

Thane:  One thing does puzzle me, however.  How do you avoid detection?

Legion:  Geth do not have many of the weaknesses of organics.  We do not require sustenance as organics do.  Nor do we require air or rest.  Geth can remain absolutely motionless for an indefinite period of time before making a move.  In effect, geth can be completely silent and focused on a target, with no physical distractions.

Thane:  But, your head is illuminated.  Like a flashlight.

Legion:  ::pause::...working as intended...

[SlottsMachine]

A2N2T wrote...

Shepard: Oh God. Hide me.
Garrus: From what exactly?
Shepard: It's Conrad.
Garrus: Oh no.
Jack: You want us to hide you from HIM? ****, I knew you were a ****.
Shepard: You don't know what it's like. He's relentless. We might not be able to avoid an encounter with him.
Jack: What the hell Shepard? Look, you want him gone? Watch this. (Jack goes up to Conrad)
Garrus: Do you think this is necessary, Shepard?
Shepard: Yes, I do.
(Jack returns)
Shepard: Well?
Jack: He won't be bothering you anymore.
Garrus: What did you do?
Jack: I talked with him.
Garrus: YOU talked to him? You didn't kill him or toss him around some? Wow. Shepard, I think your relationship with her is starting to work.
Jack: **** you, you cat-lizard. And you won't be so surprised in a little bit anyway.
Shepard: Jack, what did you tell Con... ****, he's coming over here. (Hides behind Jack)
Conrad: (To Garrus) Hey!
Garrus: Hey?
Conrad: I hear that you go by Archangel?
Garrus: Jack?!
Conrad: May I have you autograph? Oh, and a picture?
Garrus: Damnit Jack!

Nice

[ADLegend21]

A2N2T wrote...

Shepard: Oh God. Hide me.
Garrus: From what exactly?
Shepard: It's Conrad.
Garrus: Oh no.
Jack: You want us to hide you from HIM? ****, I knew you were a ****.
Shepard: You don't know what it's like. He's relentless. We might not be able to avoid an encounter with him.
Jack: What the hell Shepard? Look, you want him gone? Watch this. (Jack goes up to Conrad)
Garrus: Do you think this is necessary, Shepard?
Shepard: Yes, I do.
(Jack returns)
Shepard: Well?
Jack: He won't be bothering you anymore.
Garrus: What did you do?
Jack: I talked with him.
Garrus: YOU talked to him? You didn't kill him or toss him around some? Wow. Shepard, I think your relationship with her is starting to work.
Jack: **** you, you cat-lizard. And you won't be so surprised in a little bit anyway.
Shepard: Jack, what did you tell Con... ****, he's coming over here. (Hides behind Jack)
Conrad: (To Garrus) Hey!
Garrus: Hey?
Conrad: I hear that you go by Archangel?
Garrus: Jack?!
Conrad: May I have you autograph? Oh, and a picture?
Garrus: Damnit Jack!

hahah way to go Jack!

[Harmless Crunch]

We need to keep this thread alive !

[Sandbox47]

Garrus: You seem worried.

Shep: I am.

Garrus: What's wrong?

Shep: It occurs to me that, if there is such a place as heaven then it seems to me that angels do their best to push people out of it without doing us the curtesy of telling us how to stay out of hell.

Garrus: Good thing that you're an atheist?

Shep: Yup.

________________________________________________________________________________



Shep: Tali? I wasn't sure but you seemed down on the way back, in the shuttle.

Tali: It's nothing.

Shep: Humour me.

Tali: Well... if you know that you have the blood of people you love on your hands... And that everyone have accepted it as something natural and unavoidable... Does that mean that everyone share that blood on their hands? If you order me to do something that kills me and Garrus accepts that someone's death was unavoidable, will that mean that he shares the responsibility of my death or does no one take the resposiblity?

Shep: This is about Haestrom?

Tali: Partly, yes.

Shep: If you die then the one who shoots bears the responsibility. If you kill someone then it's your responsibility.

Tali: I guess so. It seems that no one dies of age these days.

Shep: With krogan and asari who live for millenia, turians who are basically the Council's organic barriers and the rest of the galaxy fighting pirates, corruption and blackmail? We don't have time for age nowadays.

________________________________________________________________________________



Miranda: You've been withdrawn since the Collector base.

Joker: Oh, headmistress. I've just been thinking.

Miranda: Care to share?

Joker: Why are you interested? I've never talked to you aside from the "I had no choice!" thing.

Miranda: So talk to me now.

Joke: *sighs* I'm behind Shepard and I'm with you guys to the end. But there are a lot of things I won't be able to do because of my condition. I can't change that, I know, but the realization hit home after the Collector attack. I could just, you know, die and never have tried to ride a bike or jump on a trampoline.

Miranda: You're not missing much.

Joker: I know. It's just a thing, you know. I'll get over it.

Miranda: To most people I would advice to "Live with it, get over it." For you, however, I think that the best advice would be to wait and see. Shepard has done many things for her crew. While I'm certain that your condition won't improve while you're here, opportunities to do things you've missed out on might still occur.

Joker: What, Shepard is my lucky medalion?

Miranda: In a sense.

Joker: *thinks* Well, I guess that's better than a jinx, right? Don't want any peddals for flying a ship, do we?

________________________________________________________________________________



Those were weird. I wanted to keep them short and serious. Now they're just serious... seriously wierd, ahahaha! No? Oh well.

[Dean_the_Young]

Commander Shepard to Issue Statement on the Afterlife Tomorrow

Commander Shepard, the first Human Spectre, will be returning to the galactic news cycle tomorrow on his own terms. Plagued by recent rumors of association with terrorists after being declared MIA/KIA two years ago, as well as reports of acts across the Terminus. Multiple Citadel News Network offices received word that the Commander will release a taped broadcast, which sources say include a reflection on his own experiences of the Afterlife. Various scientific experts are already fiercly debating whether such a return from the grave is even possible, and if so if it would even prove anything, while a number of religious groups are already issuing prepatory statements in response.