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Who is the Best Driver in Shepard's Squad?

Débuté par Guest_iOnlySignIn_* , févr. 10 2011 07:53

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#1
Guest_iOnlySignIn_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 07:53

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We constantly joke about Shepard being a terrible driver, while in fact it's us players who drive badly (partly due to the Mako AND the Hammerhead's designs). My question is, who is the best driver in Shepard's squad?

Top candidates:

Legion - he has superhuman reaction speed, built-in GPS (Galactic Positioning System), and can calculate the optimal path a million times faster than Google maps.

Tali - although she's an organic, she's at least as good a mechanic as Legion. She's also Shepard's chief engineer and kept the Normandys in top conditions - she can tweak her car into an uber smart super car.

Joker - best pilot in the Alliance Fleet - driving a car is a cakewalk compared to flying a star ship.

EDI - she can replace Joker. Completely, by the end of ME2.

Thane - he remembers every place he's ever visited with photographic memory - he never makes a wrong turn. Guided by an assassin's deft hand, the car he drives will be smooth and lightning fast.

Kasumi - another tech expert on par with Legion. In addition, she's probably stolen the Galaxy's most advanced car from some rich dude. Or the sixteen most advanced cars.

Zaeed - he once drove a tonka into the mouth of a living Thresher Maw. He was the only one on the tonka who survived.

Garrus - because he has the Batmobile.

Miranda - because she's perfect.

Grunt - because he's perfect HE. IS. KROGAAAAAN.

Jacob - because there's gotta be something he's better than everybody else at.

Modifié par iOnlySignIn, 10 février 2011 - 08:45 .

#2
Collider
Posté 10 février 2011 - 07:58

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Jacob - because there's gotta be something he's better than everybody else at.


#3
STG
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:00

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iOnlySignIn wrote...
Thane - he remembers every place he's ever visited with photographic memory - he never makes a wrong turn. Guided by an assassin's deft hand, the car he drives will be smooth and lightning fast.


You'll end up in a lava pool during one of his flashbacks. :P

#4
Guest_iOnlySignIn_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:01

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STG wrote...

iOnlySignIn wrote...
Thane - he remembers every place he's ever visited with photographic memory - he never makes a wrong turn. Guided by an assassin's deft hand, the car he drives will be smooth and lightning fast.

You'll end up in a lava pool during one of his flashbacks. :P

"Green light. Green light begins to flash. Green light turns yellow. Thin, small boy suddenly runs onto the pedestrian crossing, old flip flops pattering on the asphalt. I press the break pedal to the bottom and swing the steering wheel to the left. The car begins to slid... " "THANE! THANE! LAVA LAVA LAVA- "

Modifié par iOnlySignIn, 10 février 2011 - 08:07 .

#5
ElectronicFerret
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:10

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'Not Liara.'

#6
Reavah
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:21

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Zaeed: He's so awesome that the vehicle will drive itself to its destination, and dispense cake to everyone upon arrival.  B)

#7
Guest_iOnlySignIn_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:26

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ElectronicFerret wrote...

'Not Liara.'

She's worse than Shepard. Or else she'd drive on that car chase - it's like she automatically popped into the passenger seat. :-)

Reavah wrote...

Zaeed: He's so awesome that the vehicle will drive itself to its destination, and dispense cake to everyone upon arrival.  B)

Cake? Zaeed did't spend 20 years killing mercs to eat bloody cake! It'd better be goddamn barbecue of dead Blood Pack Warriors I tell ya, or Zaeed is not finishing the job.

Modifié par iOnlySignIn, 10 février 2011 - 08:29 .

#8
TexasToast712
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:30

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I nominate Grunt.

Shepard: Grunt! go around the rock! GO AROUND!

Grunt:  Shepard, Who said anything about going around it. We are going through it because, I AM KROGAN!

Shepard and crew: GRUNT NO!

RIP Shepard and crew.

Image IPB

#9
Zrvan
Posté 10 février 2011 - 01:59

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I would probably say Wrex or Samara, because they could have easily set aside a decade or two to do nothing but learn how to drive. Realistically, as everyone on Shepard's squad is an adult (except Grunt) with some degree of badassery (excepting no one), I think you could realistically make a case for anyone being a good driver.



I'm inclined to argue for Zaeed, since he's ME's version of Dos Equis' World's Most Interesting Man. But I am a Zaeed fanboy, so I am clearly biased. And this is only in the 'overall' category.



When it comes to being able to drive ANYTHING, I again send it to the centuries-old crowd, since they've probably seen two dozen changes of tech in their lifespans and are used to learning new things to the point where they can see past the illusion of 'differences' to the true forms of vehicles.



When it comes to being able to drive something, no matter how crappy and beat-up it is, I'd throw that to Tali. The quarians have to deal with second-hand, salvaged, or otherwise subpar equipment all the time, and Tali is a natural with tech. I'd trust her with the Mako's controls, no matter its condition.



In a combat situation, I guess I'd want Mordin driving. He's a Salarian, so he has a photographic memory and is extremely nimble-witted. He'd assess and kick ass while Shepard's still trying to assess. Plus, he could spam Cryo Blast and drive over a lake.

#10
Guest_Imperium Alpha_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 02:03

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I nominate EDI... seriously can you really beat a AI that have access to all topography, scaners and data ?

Else, i'd go with jacob... Heavy risk, but the priiizee<_<

#11
Suron
Posté 10 février 2011 - 02:06

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if we see none of them drive...how can anyone even speculate on this?



seriously I know these forums stagnate but...this thread makes no sense as no one can argue for anyone...again..because we don't see ANYONE actually drive.

#12
Guest_Imperium Alpha_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 02:07

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Suron wrote...

if we see none of them drive...how can anyone even speculate on this?

seriously I know these forums stagnate but...this thread makes no sense as no one can argue for anyone...again..because we don't see ANYONE actually drive.


Who decide we ABSOLUTELY need to argue on something ?... :pinched:;)

#13
MaaZeus
Posté 10 février 2011 - 05:16

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Zaeed: "Now this street takes me back..."

#14
Hela
Posté 10 février 2011 - 05:25

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Zaeed would spot someone on the street resembling Vido (dead or alive at that point, no difference). Mass rage ensues and he´s, of course, the only one to make it.

But, I´d recommend the multitasking Mr. Gardner - he´ll fix the faulty tidbits around the car, make sandwiches, demonstratingly wiping his hands from time to time with overused wet napkin and steers with his knee. Fun, if not a bit suicidal run. At the end, he passes around sugarwater.

#15
jeweledleah
Posté 10 février 2011 - 05:27

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Joker. he's the only one in that crew of maniacs (and that includes Shepard) that can actually drive.



that's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.



#16
JRCHOharry
Posté 10 février 2011 - 05:29

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My Shepard always lets Grunt drive whenever he has the chance. His arguments are the most persuasive out of the group

"I AM DRIIIVING!!"

Modifié par JRCHOharry, 10 février 2011 - 05:29 .

#17
Schneidend
Posté 10 février 2011 - 05:43

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Collider wrote...


Jacob - because there's gotta be something he's better than everybody else at.


Like not being a headcase?

Having one of the most useful biotic powers and one of the most useful squad ammo powers?

Being somebody Shepard can just talk to without not getting buried in personal baggage?

Jacob's only crime is that FemShep sounds like a drunk hooker when talking to him.

#18
Zall
Posté 10 février 2011 - 05:59

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Imperium Alpha wrote...

Suron wrote...

if we see none of them drive...how can anyone even speculate on this?

seriously I know these forums stagnate but...this thread makes no sense as no one can argue for anyone...again..because we don't see ANYONE actually drive.


Who decide we ABSOLUTELY need to argue on something ?... :pinched:;)

It's a great joke thread which made me smirk. As for arguing... haven't seen anyone jump at someone's throats yet^^

Since Tali is naturally good at handling machines, she'd be perfect for driving something of the size of a Mako. On the other hand, I doubt that she had driven many ground vehicles in her life. She's the person who's tinkering with machines and improving them, not driving them around. Lack of practice might backfire.

Jack could be pretty good at crazy fast chases, but horribly reckless. If the fastest way is going through a wall, she IS going to use that route. Who cares that the car is a goner, at least the crew arrived in time for the party.

Joker is the greatest pilot we know and although I have no evidence at all that he'd ever been behind the wheel of car, I'm utterly convinced that he's the champ at driving them. Don't ask.

#19
CroGamer002
Posté 10 février 2011 - 06:10

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Zaeed is best, even drunk.

#20
naledgeborn
Posté 10 février 2011 - 07:18

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Zaeed drinks while driving without making it look like GAHWDAAM CIEUICIDE!! Oh and " Do you smoke Shepard? You shouldn't, those things'll kill ya."

Modifié par naledgeborn, 10 février 2011 - 07:18 .

#21
Village_Idiot
Posté 10 février 2011 - 07:28

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I take no credit.

'Sup dawg, we heard you like rockclimbing so we put jumpjets in your car so you can climb while you drive.

Modifié par Shadrach 88, 10 février 2011 - 10:47 .

#22
LuxDragon
Posté 10 février 2011 - 07:45

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This thread is so full of win.



It's nice to laugh so damn much at so many posts.



Garrus - because he has the Batmobile. And his uber visor that everyone is copying.

#23
Guest_iOnlySignIn_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:38

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JRCHOharry wrote...

My Shepard always lets Grunt drive whenever he has the chance. His arguments are the most persuasive out of the group

"I AM DRIIIVING!!"

Not with my FemShep (who is like Grunt's adoptive mom in addition to his Battlemaster).

"Can I drive, Battlemaster?"

"We've talked about this already, Grunt. You have to wait until you're five and get your license."

"Krogans don't need licenses!"

"No, but the Council requires one, and we're driving a vehicle manufactured and regulated by a Council species. Also, you're not allowed to operative heavy machinery until you're five."

"But I AM heavy machinery!"

"It's OK Grunt. How about we let you play with the driving sim in the AI Core after we're back on the Normandy?"

"But it's not the real thing! The explosions don't burn! And the robot keeps hogging the console!"

#24
Guest_iOnlySignIn_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:40

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Shadrach 88 wrote...
http://img519.images...seemerollin.jpg

I take no credit.

Holy Batman, that's some nice tats on Sheploo's arm.

Modifié par iOnlySignIn, 10 février 2011 - 09:01 .

#25
Guest_iOnlySignIn_*
Posté 10 février 2011 - 08:50

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Zaeed - he once drove a tonka into the mouth of a living Thresher Maw. He was the only one on the tonka who survived.

Modifié par iOnlySignIn, 10 février 2011 - 08:53 .

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