ending; 1 (mage) redcliff, before the main powning.
After you and alister talk with rioden about how to kill the archdemon... the warden enter his room to find morrigen standing by the fire place;
Morrigen; Do not be alarmed, tis' only i.
Warden; alarmed?!? how the hell did you get in here? were's my trusty guard hound..?
Morrigen; *sigh* he ran away from me...
Warden; i dont blame him...
Morrigan; What did you say?
warden; Nothing!!... perhaps i should go look for him..
Morrigen; no please stay! i know about the loop in your hole...
Warden; loop... hole? did you follow me to the pearl.. you.... stalker!
morrigen; errr, you know? you dieing when you kill the archdemon?
Warden; Ohhh! *slaping his forehead* that! phew! its cool, old dudes got it...
Morrigen; errr, the pearl? as in the **** house? iv heard about that place. you dirty son a...
Warden; it was a joke, i knew what you ment! *looking very nervous*
Morrigen; right... forget i said anything, perhaps alister will be more willing to hear me out..
Warden; really? is there another alister you know, who isnt a complete... prince alister?
Morrigen; good point. what i propose is that you and me lay here tonight, and from our joining a baby will be born...
Warden; whhoooooh whhoooh whoh, hold up.... lay? as in put my... in your... *shudders*
Morrigen; yes, is that so bad?
Warden; well... *looking around for an excuse to change suject or... anything* maybe?
Morrigen; *a heavy sign* i have magic that can make you forget.. or not feel?
Warden; i.... err, would love to! ...but...
Morrigen; but? you would rather die?
Warden; of course not! (i would rather die slowly and painfully he though)
Morrigen; good, then you will lay with me?
Warden; i would love to but i have a.... note from err... the first enchanter! (good call!!)
Morrigen; really...? for what?
Warden; i....errr... have a condition?
Morrigan; i see, you cant get it... up?
Warden; yeah, well no... but maybe there is another way
Morrigen; alister... *a heavy sigh*
Warden; or that (i was thinking u become a warden and take the kill hit. kills 2 ugly beasts in one hit heh)
Morrigen; i doubt he will willing
Warden; dont be silly, he's practacly in love with you!
Morrigen; then i shall speeck with him immetiatly.
Warden; (panic!) no, no... allow me.
Morrigen; *another heavy sigh* very well
Warden; do you have any cheese? im sure i could lure him....
Morrigan; *another heavy sigh* please do not be over long.
----
Warden; Hey! hey! theres my favoirte warden king! hows you? good? yeah? awsome!
Alister; *looks around* ohhh, you mean me!
Warden; .....
Alister; couldent sleep either?
Warden; im shattered, but there's a horrid beat in my room.. even scared away my hound
Alister; a demon?
warden; something like that, yeah
Alister; need any help killing it?
Warden; hmmm... nah... anyways i have a question for you
Alister; oh? what is it my friend? anything i can help with? you know your my best firend, i would do anything for you after you found duncans shield for me...
Warden; Really? even something so horrid and disgusting it will make you want to rip out your own eye balls and scrub yourself raw every day for the next...
Alister; well, maybe not ANYTHING heh
Warden; well.... i know how we can beat the archdemon and totally not die! good times! right?
Alister; really?!? thats great, what ever it is, im game!
Warden; you need to sleep with morrigan... knock her up and tegan is your uncles brother cousins... something
Alister; haha.. it almost sounded like you said sleep with morrigan.. i must be in the fade or...?
Warden; yeah.... i did, you lucky dog, you! (god, please do it! im begging you!)
Alister; i knew it! she is a filthy blood mage... controlling your mind!
Warden; maker help me.... please
Alister; i cant, i have a note from the arl... and my future wife... you know, the queen
Warden; oh? really?
Alister; yeah, i uh totallt have it right here....
Warden; let me see it then.
Alister; ok let me just....
*he makes a run for it and the warden gives chance*
Alister; *running for his life* never! i would rather die!
Warden; get back here you spoiled princess!
Alister; noooooo.....!!!
---
Warden; *stops chanceing alsiter* Oh... my... god! is that....?
Alister; *Slows and looks back* what? is it morrigan? *he looks horrified*
Warden; Dun.... Duncan?!?
Alister; wh...what? *he slowly starts walking back*
Warden; (how dumb can you be...?) what? ~ alister? he's fine! ~ alister, it's duncan! he's come back for you!
Alister; your lieing!
Warden; what kind of a monster do you think i am..... (looks over to "duncan") i know right? so rude!
Alister; *starts running towards warden looking like he was about to cry* it cant be!
Warden; (hah!) *he readies a sleeping spell* cheese? no, i think he hates it, sorry
Alister; i love cheese! you dont know anything about me...
Warden casts a sleep spell;
Warden; hahahaha... and the mage wins again *does a little victory dance punches the air a few times then drags alister back to his chambers*
-----
Warden; ohhhh morrigan! your beloved prince awaits you! *laughing as he says it*
Morrigan; Great, what did he say?
Warden; oh, he agreed. he would hardly contain himself.. you know, cos your totally...
*morrigan enters alisters room....*
Morrigan; whats with all the rope? your picking up some wierd habbits at the pearl...
Warden; rabbits? no.... just nugs
Morrigan; uhh... maybe you should lay off the pearl... not that its there any more i would think
Warden; *under his breath* and "maybe" you deffenatly need to crawl under a rock and die...
Morrigan; is that.... blood... gushing out of his head?
Warden; oh...errm, like i said... he couldent contain himself... fell over, you know how stupid he is.. (looking quite worried now)
Morrigan; Indeed? we'll then i shall get to work...
Warden; (phew!!) have fun! dont let his screaming though the gag put you off
Morrigan; gag? you had to gag him?
Warden; it was his idea of course... to err... stop him biting... little nipper that one..
Morrigan; you sure you dont want to...?
Warden; pffft, do you know how hard it was to get uh..... never mind.
...
Warden; enjoy your self *winking at the half concious alister*
An hour later morrigan left alisters room to find half the army standing there with flowers and "congrats on being a father" ballons and cards. apart from sten, who had a cookie... "tis done" morrigan annonced. "is it a boy or a girl??" the arl of redcliff asked. "how should i know" said morrigan with a little spite, almost hated maybe? "magic?" tegon added. morrigan just signed and walked away "idiots" she mumbeled as she left.
Alister came out of the room, he looked shocked, maybe even disturbed? he barged past the gathered crowd and ran down the coridor, outside to get some fresh air the warden assumed. He would have persoanlly had a shower, with acid, the warden felt bad for sure, but also glad that he didnt have to do it "a real life saver that one" as he patted the queen on the back quite hard, she didnt look to pleased to say the least.
"enchantment?" sandel asked his father looked at him almost upset... almost wishing his son didnt know about such things "yes son, enchantment...."
some say alister died braveing in the battle with the archdemon, where as people who were and not dieing of darkspawn taint (the warden mostly) say he jumped off the tower the second the archdemon fell. like a whimp..
Who could blame him if he did?
I guess we will never know....
Well you will, because il tell you. he jumped
no hate intended on morrigan btw, iv agreed to her "idea" as much as anyone else... dieing blows lol. and alister is to awsomely alister to die or worse.hope you enjoyed it.
il add some more up some time depending on the replies.... i hope no one has done this already, that would blow.. hard work this thinking stuff
also, sorry about my grammer, spelling and general ignorance... deal with it.
edit, spelling mistakes that were to obvious - 5!! times, god im good... there's more i bet
Modifié par Pieboi, 26 février 2011 - 04:41 .
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