I'm happy with how DA2 looks to be shaping up. If you aren't, that sucks, and I empathize with that.
I don't really wanna poo-poo people's preferences and all that. I think DA2 is an RPG and expect it'll be good. I think ME2 was as well, and so on. I have a hard time nailing RPG down to the tropes because in a lot of ways, the tropes of an RPG are more fluid than other genres, which I see as a strength. For example, the fighting games have the trope of competition; it's not a fighting game if you're not in direct fisticuffs-opposition to another entity (well, there's zoning and stuff, but still, you're trying to take out the other person). That's a lot less flexible than item collection, or character progression, and so on.
I have my own take on what the core of an RPG is, but I really just don't feel like going on about it. The short version is that I think that RPGs reach for the same kind of suspension of disbelief that mainstream fiction novels reach for, and some people feel that the gameplay changes in DA2 are stopping them from feeling as if they can insert themselves in the world as well, or simply dislike the gameplay changes from a stark mechanical standpoint ("Wtf, where's my overhead camera?"). To the former, I like to consider myself as taking on the persona of the character in the game, rather than inserting my persona: perhaps that will help with your enjoyment of the game? You step into the shoes of Hawke more completely than in something like Radiant Historia, in which you merely control the main character, but not so much so that the character must be a blank slate. I find it to be a very happy compromise; I like the characters in RPGs to have personality, but I also like to be able to insert some of myself into the game. For those that dislike things from a mechanical perspective, I can only reiterate that it sucks, and I'd advise you to try renting the game to get a more up-to-date and full picture of the game before dismissing it out of hand. There are games I expected to loathe that turned out great (like Radiant Historia) and games I so desperately wanted to love despite my hatred (Final Fantasy X). Try and rent it or something, give it a few hours, and if you dislike it, you're only out a bit of time and a few bucks. If you do, you can either buy it or play through the rental :-).
Anyway, lately, the only misstep I think Bioware has made was taking ragdolling out of ME2. That and I'd like another area that felt like the Citadel to run around in. I want the first because, while I was incredibly delighted at the addition of hit zones on enemies (or whatever you call it; headshots did more damage, etc), the thing that made me most happy in ME1 was blowing some fool away with my shotgun and watching them backflip across the room. Ragdoll effects just truly delight me, and I'd like them back. I like the second because it just felt cool going into the bar and seeing the nicer areas and seedier areas of the Citadel. I just like seeing that big city environment; another thing I look forward to in DA2.
This is also coming from a person that truly hated Baldur's Gate. I liked Icewind Dale well enough, but something about Baldur's Gate infuriated me; I did enjoy the Kensai class, though.