“Step on it” Harbinger yelled as Exodus, the getaway driver Reaper weaved through traffic.
Their formula 1 reaper mobile sped away from the Museum. Distant cop sirens wailed as they pulled into an abandoned warehouse. Something isn’t right… Harbinger thought to himself. The plan was executed perfectly, how did the cops know what happened? It was almost as if someone had tipped the pigs off, Harbinger pondered as he looked at his reflection in the Jack Ruby Diamond. 500 billion space bucks… 250 mil each.
“That was some smooth driving” Harbinger said as he lit up a cigar. Exodus looked at the Diamond thoughtfully… “What are you going to do with your slice Harbinger?” he asked. “I don’t know” Harbinger said. “Probably buy a death ray or something and **** with commander Shepard, that guys a douche”.
*ZIP* Suddenly Exodus pulled a zipper and shed off his outer layer, revealing none other than COMMANDER SHEPARD. “You think I’d miss this party?” Shepard said as he pulled out a SPACE LAZER and pointed it at his nemesis.
“Shepard! It was you all along!” Harbinger exclaimed. “That’s right” Shepard replied. “Harbinger, I’m returning that Jack Ruby Diamond to the museum and taking you down by the books”.
“I can’t let you do that Shepard” said a familiar voice behind shepard. Suddenly from the shadows, SOVERIGN emerges with a revolver pointed at shepard. “You see, Harbinger and I are taking the Jack Ruby Diamond, and with it we will fund our REAPER ACTIVITIES and SUCH…”
“You won’t get away with this!” Yelled Shepard. Mayor Hackett already knows about this robbery, in 5 minutes this warehouse will be surrounded!
“Oh but that’s the thing… ” Said Harbinger calmly. Suddenly the MAYOR stepped out from the shadows and turned to Shepard. “Good work Shepard, you did just what you were ordered to”. “Mayor Hackett, what are you doing here? Shepard said. The mayor looked at shepard and a grin came over his face… “You see Shepard… not only am I the mayor of space city, I am also A REAPER!!!”
*ZIP* A metallic tentacle emerges and unzips the costume, revealing the mayor to be a REAPER.
“And now that you know all this, you must be killed” said the reapers, as they aimed their lazer beams at the commander.
“NOT SO FAST” yelled a feminine voice. Suddenly a PIMPED OUT PORSCHE “The Normandy” came crashing through the window, landing ontop of Harbinger. Ashley Williams, Miranda, and that blue chick do backflips out of the car, revealing that they are all dressed like s1uts and dual wielding uzis and stuff.
GAGAGAGAGAG BOOM bullets start to fly and stuff explodes. ZAP ZAP Goes the reaper space lazers!
“Crickey! We got to get outta here!” Yelled Miranda. “Hold on” Yelled Shepard, who suddenly notices a giant metal hook hanging from a chain on the top of the warehouse.
“CANT LET YOU OFF THE HOOK THAT EASILY” Shepard yelled as he karate-kicked the hook right into Harbinger’s REAPER ASS.
“NOOOOO” Yelled Harbinger as the Jack Ruby Diamond fell into Shepard’s hand.
“I went to Jared” Shepard said as he handed the diamond to one of the chicks and they started to make out. The reapers flee the scene as Shepard and his team drive out of the warehouse just as it EXPLODES.
"What do we do now?" Asked the blue chick.
"The Reapers are coming" Shepard said, dramatically. "I"ve got to stop them!"
*Mass Effect Theme Plays as Shepard looks up into the stars*
MASS EFFECT 3
SUPER SEXY SPACE BATTLEZ
Modifié par Crunk N DaTrunk, 14 avril 2011 - 04:43 .
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