Firstly the OP's post is a bit ridiclious but i'm going to reply anyway.
Well it seems that new players will be able to iniate romances with old characters, reguardless of whether they are squadmates or not, so my guess is that Ash/ Kaiden will be made bi because they were originally concieved as bi options and therefore the writers wouldn't really be changing the characters. People got used to the Qunari having horns in DA2, considering that they were cut from DA1 due to technical limitions, if people are talking purely about consistancy issues (which i'm sure that they're not) then it really shouldn't be a big deal.
Then I would say that Garrus/ Tali/ Thane would be bi options because they're aliens anyway which technically makes them pansexual even when Shepard is the opposite sex. And since they are able to be attracted to Shepard, based on his personality and character rather than species I can't see why their gender wouldn't make a difference. Sure "Garrus doesn't like other dudes" but Garrus doesn't like humans either.
And then all or some of the (i'm guessing limited amount of) new LI's will be bi options. Personally i'm hoping for some more alien romances.

(female turian?)
So there, plenty of options minus Joker. But if they did make Joker a s/s option, which I doubt, he'd very probably be available for both sexes.
And no they wouldn't make Joker gay, that would make him bi, which is perfectly possible considering we know really nothing about his sexuality at this point apart from the fact that he doesn't act stereotypically gay (and in real life, not a great many people do) and really the only opposition i'm seeing seems to be that people have a problem with having a bisexual/ homosexual aboard there ship, which is a bit ridiclious and offensive.
Really, i'm just glad the option is available, will let my femshep's potentional partners be a bit more diverse since I almost always prefer the female LI's. Does it have to effect anyone? No it absolutly does not, I understand completly if there will only be limited s/s options as really, its a start that it is at least included.

All those worried about the change of characters seem to be forgetting that the characters are going to change anyway, Garrus sure went back to his old habbits in ME2 after I spent an entire game trying to make him respect the rules. Guess what, I appreciated what he became in ME2. It's a logical consiquence of characters who have a diverse set of character paths who will be carried over in to the next game, Bioware is going to step in and make some choices, sometimes you like them (e.g. Tali's characterisation was very popular), sometimes you don't (Anders springs to mind, altough his character change really has nothing to do with his sexuality, he changes in almost every other way too), but we just need to have some faith. We got used to the thermal clips, the biotics seemingly becoming the new magic, the baby terminator, the entire galaxy seemingly falling in love with shepard reguardless of his species, i'm sure we can get used to a few more options being opened up in a video game, that not only we like, but a huge amount of people, who are very different from ourselves like too.
The bottom line is that Mass effect is really just a single example of something that is changing with our times, homosexuality, etc. is becoming increasingly recognised in the media, and really, if you're getting upset about its inclusion in masseffect, you have alot more dissapointments coming your way, so, with all due respect, deal with it.