105 réponses à ce sujet

[Milana_Saros]

mgs00 wrote...

If I went out on a date with a beautiful girl

Uhhuhh....the quiet, nerdy guy with low confidence going for "beautiful" girls only? Somehow I'm getting the feeling as if I've heard this countless of times before.

Let's assume that you aren't a troll. The only thing you can do really is kick yourself in the butt and start going out more if that's what you REALLY want. Other choice is to just be yourself, deal with it and stop agonizing about it. Some people are less social and outgoing than others. As much as I detest suggestions in the manner of "educate yourself to be more social" or "go out more" they still do have a point. Crawling into yourself and being afraid of people won't get you nowhere.

[Ulous]

I like how the OP is asking this to a community that for the best part wanted insest & granny sex in their RPG's.

[A Crusty Knight Of Colour]

Milana_Saros wrote...

Let's assume that you aren't a troll.

Bold assumption.

[Druss99]

Volus Warlord wrote...

Offer to kill their ex's?

Kill them in an amusing way though.

You could always take her some place romantic like McDonalds and take your pants off. Women love hilarious sh*t like that. Shout at some waitresses(waitri?) too.

Make funny comments like:
"Jesus your arse looks huge in that dress!"
"You look like you have aids!"
"It doesn't bother me that you look much older than me and people will think I can do better."
"Would it be cool if I gave you VD?"
"I think I've come, hold on I gotta go look."
"You look like you've been poured into that dress and forgot to say when."
"These chicken McNuggets are expensive. You better be putting out!"
"You don't happen to have a sister as sl*tty as you do you? Preferably a better looking one."

Women love hilarious lines like that and you simply can't go wrong. Try them all or as many as she can take before her sides burst.

[Milana_Saros]

mrcrusty wrote...

Milana_Saros wrote...

Let's assume that you aren't a troll.

Bold assumption.

I love life of danger.

[Weak Sauce Hype]

Druss99 wrote...

Volus Warlord wrote...

Offer to kill their ex's?

Kill them in an amusing way though.

You could always take her some place romantic like McDonalds and take your pants off. Women love hilarious sh*t like that. Shout at some waitresses(waitri?) too.

Make funny comments like:
"Jesus your arse looks huge in that dress!"
"You look like you have aids!"
"It doesn't bother me that you look much older than me and people will think I can do better."
"Would it be cool if I gave you VD?"
"I think I've come, hold on I gotta go look."
"You look like you've been poured into that dress and forgot to say when."
"These chicken McNuggets are expensive. You better be putting out!"
"You don't happen to have a sister as sl*tty as you do you? Preferably a better looking one."

Women love hilarious lines like that and you simply can't go wrong. Try them all or as many as she can take before her sides burst.

LOL

[Seagloom]

Find out if she's ticklish. If she is, bring a feather and go to town with it.

Or you can take DeathWurm and Milana's advice. That works too.

[mousestalker]

If you feel you lack social skills, then the best way to gain confidence is to build up your abilities. It's like lifting weights. If you lift heavier and heavier weights, you will become stronger.

Likewise, if you talk to more and more women, you will gain conversational skills, especially if you reflect on the conversations and try to learn from them. It's best to start with women who are in your comfort zone. For most men that would be their mother and sisters.

Every evening, ask your mother how her day has been and what she did. If you have a sister your age or older, ask her for help. Be up front about why you are asking.

If you deliberately work at your social skills, they will improve.

[Naughty Bear]

mgs00 wrote...

I'm a nerd with low confidence who never had a girlfriend before and never had a friend who was a girl although I have talked and got along with them in places like school or work but I never really had a close relationship with any female outside of my family.  If I went out on a date with a beautiful girl how can I make her laugh and keep her entertained so she won't be bored and have this akward silence which could f*** up my confidence even more?  Btw, I'm almost 30.

I actually hope this is real, that will make this twice as funny.

Modifié par Naughty Bear, 01 juin 2011 - 02:50 .

[n2nw]

[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Asking strangers on the internet is not always a good idea.
[/quote]
True.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
So, for women there are basically 2 types of males: those that they are attracted to and those that they aren't. Alfa and beta is quite close to the truth. They will only let those they are attracted to as close as you want to be. So you need to be in this group. The other ones are just friends, or they are just using them, they don't care etc.[/quote]
Not true.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Avoid spending too much money on girls who don't like you, who are obviously just using you. A lot of guys like you (lacking self-confidence) can make this mistake You shouldn't. [/quote]
True
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
A girl either likes you or not. She knows this when she sees you. So, if she likes you, she will laugh at basically everything you say. It is not really about being funny than being positive and entertaining. This is the simple truth [/quote]
Not true.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Another thing you should know, but looks like you don't-girls are, well, human beings. They have thoughts, fears, dreams and desires similar to yours. [/quote]
True.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Their way of thinking is different, their perception of the world is different, but they are not at all that hard to understand.[/quote]
Not necessarily true.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
So, you should start talking to them. No other way And don't worry-do you remember every girl you see/meet/talks to you? I don't think so. Well, they don't either. So failure doesn't mean a thing, it only matters how much you think about it. [/quote]
True.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
If the girl likes you, she will probably do everything she can to avoid this awkward silence you mentioned. And she will do most of the talking You just listen, sometimes make fun of what she says, don't apologise for your jokes ever. It doesn't matter how stupid or meaningless they are, girls perceive things differently. She will remember the feelings she felt around you, your aura etc, NOT your exact words. So, just try different things, and never worry.[/quote]
Not true.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Especially in your 30s when women start thinking about family. They need emotional and financial stability, someone independent and self-confident. Don't show too much interest, sometimes better to hide it completely (but only if she likes you and is flirting with you). If she has no interest in you it is completely irrelevant whether you hide or show interest.
Another important thing is whether you live in a big or a small city. Big cities make things easier because they you anonymity.[/quote]
.................just............no.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Another thing-people out there could be as lonely as you. Don't be afraid to talk to them. [/quote]
True.
[quote]Ggrrr wrote...
Don’t give too much information about you away. Don’t tell her too much about you, let her wonder. [/quote]
Not true.

Women, just like men, are all different. Some are just as insecure, nerdy, dorky, and scared as you. Be yourself and find someone who likes you for who you are, otherwise, you will be unhappy. It's okay if you're a nerd. It's okay if you're shy, ugly, handsome, outgoing, tall, short, fat, thin, dorky, cool or an alien. Someone out there will like you because you are you. And don't go for the games. They rarely (if ever) end well. The best thing to do is to like yourself first and be comfortable with who you are. Then you will be better able to find someone who can appreciate *you*. But remember that appreciation in a relationship is a two-way street. Find someone who you can appreciate for who she really is, too.  Good luck.

Modifié par n2nw, 01 juin 2011 - 03:24 .

[Milana_Saros]

Ggrrr wrote...
Don’t give too much information about you away. Don’t tell her too much about you, let her wonder.

Christ I didn't even notice this since I didn't read the long post...let your woman wonder, playing games and pretending to be mysterious, witholding information from her etc. etc. uhhuhh...totally the right way to get a girl.

No. Just ****ing no. This isn't some Sex in the City relationship game (seriously, some of that stuff is complete and utter BS). If you want to get into a proper relationship then be yourself. You can't live with someone and be around them 24/7 if you're playing Mr. Mystery.

Going out there and trying to be more social doesn't have to mean playing games and pretending.

[Ggrrr]

If you start being yourself too early things go to hell. What I wrote was how to begin a relationship, what to do in your first dates. Don't tell me you like guys who tell you everything about themselves on the first day. Of course not. Or guys who show too much interest without knowing you. Nerds without experience tend to do such mistakes and that could easily freak out the girl  
And you are always yourself, I never understood that advice. OP was himself all life. Where did that get him? We have to change in order to perfect ourselves. This is my view on thnigs. If you are willing to argue about them you are wellcome to, but I have too much bad experience to be naive anymore
I've never said I was an expert, I'm just trying to help the guy find the right way. Advice from strangers from the internet will not get you further than that.

Modifié par Ggrrr, 01 juin 2011 - 03:51 .

[Monica83]

tease them

[Gandalf-the-Fabulous]

So you want to make a girl laugh eh? Show her your penis, WOOOOOOOOOOOO.

[Chromie]

You should roll some D&D dice.

[Milana_Saros]

Ggrrr wrote...

If you start being yourself too early things go to hell. What I wrote was how to begin a relationship, what to do in your first dates.

Cos' every meeting with two people follows the same pattern? And if you can't be yourself from the start...argh, why even bother with something like that? I just don't get it.

Don't tell me you like guys who tell you everything about themselves on the first day.

I do prefer guys who are honest about themselves and don't leave me hanging for days without even contacting me, playing Mr. Mysterious. Call me crazy.

Of course not.

And you know this detail about me...how? That's right, you don't.

Or guys who show too much interest without knowing you.

Those type of people are known as stalkers. Not quite what we're talking about here I believe.

Nerds without experience tend to do such mistakes and that could easily freak out the girl

Then the girl isn't the right girl for them. We're all humen. We get nervous. We get dry mouthed. We make mistakes. If you really are into someone then getting text messages in the lines of "I miss you" shouldn't freak you out.

We have to change in order to perfect ourselves. This is my view on thnigs.

So we should conciously look for faults in ourselves and pretend to be someone we're not in order to advance in the dating scene? My view on this is that change comes if it comes. With age and experiences. Forcing it rarely works.

Looking back to my previous and first relationship, I was far more naivé, accepting, sacrificing, clingy and sensitive. Today, mostly due to the hardships I've gone through, I've become far more selfish, independent and even harsh. However, I went through this change for myself. I grew up.

If you are willing to argue about them you are wellcome to

Argue? Hardly. I just get snarky because of the way you express things. Might be that I'm just reading too much into your way of writing but I just can't help but nitpick on it.

but I have too much bad experience to be naive anymore

And I've had too much bad experiences to bother with personality games and trying to pretend something I'm not. If someone doesn't like me as who I am then I don't see why I should waste my time with them.

I met my fiancé through an MMO several years ago. There was no pretending. There was no games. There was no playing on looks. Just honest and open words between two people who first thought they are just friends but then developed a crush towards the person they "saw" behind the computer. Based on what was being told.

What the hell would've happened to our relationship if we both had been mysterious and secretive and even painting a better picture of ourselves? Then when we finally met after talking in MSN for 2 months, we would've been all like "Who the **** is this person?!"

Edit: Oh and I might as well add that my grandma died after I had been with my current fiancé for 3 weeks. The relationship was still very fresh, we had seen each other like only 3 times, but if he had denied me the right to express my sadness, crying on his shoulder and had skipped the funeral instead of supporting me then I would've kicked his sorry ass out of the door. Life doesn't follow supposed dating patterns.

Modifié par Milana_Saros, 01 juin 2011 - 04:25 .

[Milana_Saros]

Strangely Brown wrote...

modjospinster wrote...
casting doubt on how serious you are about it.

Really?  There is still some lingering doubt?

Well...you never know what's behind the corner.

Look! It's a



I'm so bad at this

[Ggrrr]

@Milana_Saros
I never said you should play games, not be yourself etc. You shouldn't lie or pretend to be someone you are not.
Or fix what is not broken in your behaviour. OP has some extreme problems that are not going to get fixed without him changing himself. My post was directed to him.
Playing Mr. Secretive? This is not a female (sex) fantasy, this is real life. I never said you should do something like this. But there is a certain thrill in the first talks and dates. I just don't want to take it away No need to be serious all the time. We should do what feels natural.
Of course, there are exceptions. I can't write a full manual about ALL types of girls and what to do with them. I just gavi him some very basic ideas, the rest is just experience.

[Beerfish]

Go to the Hanged man and ask Hawke and his friends to set you up with the barmaid.

[Milana_Saros]

Ggrrr wrote...

@Milana_Saros
I never said you should play games, not be yourself etc. You shouldn't lie or pretend to be someone you are not.
Or fix what is not broken in your behaviour. OP has some extreme problems that are not going to get fixed without him changing himself. My post was directed to him.
Playing Mr. Secretive? This is not a female (sex) fantasy, this is real life. I never said you should do something like this. But there is a certain thrill in the first talks and dates. I just don't want to take it away No need to be serious all the time. We should do what feels natural.
Of course, there are exceptions. I can't write a full manual about ALL types of girls and what to do with them. I just gavi him some very basic ideas, the rest is just experience.

Fair enough. Your previous posts are very easy to misunderstand. Even a bit contradictional. Given comments like "Being yourself too early will make things go to Hell" and you're comments about women "his age". My personal point was not to be serious, it was actually quite the opposite. By thinking what should and shouldn't be said, people are just making things harder. But whatever rocks anyones boat I guess.