Akernis wrote...
Dude on Fire wrote...
Mass Effect 3 left me in a living nightmare. One of those times when I actually just lay down in bed and kept telling myself it wasn't real, I'd wake up any second. But I didn't. "Born into a hell. Four turns to a hundred, and the noise is unbearable." It was like having the worst fever ever, only with no hope of getting better.
Weeks have gone. I now find myself with hope. Both for the future of the ME franchise, but mostly for myself. If I can get these emotions from looking and interacting with a screen... could it be possible for me to achive such greatness and love by myself? I'd like to believe so... and I do.
"Living dreams, loving dreams. Awakening, to what I've always dreamt of. The familiar sound... the familiar sound of the lovely love from the love of my life... will keep the notes coming.
From the reciting of the show. From the Plip and the Shevanel. From the grind that annoys. And the sarcasm... they all hate..."
Thank you Liara... for everything.
That sounds a little extreme.
I really love Liara and is deeply emotionally attached as well as suprisingly affected by the ending, but feeling like having the wost fever with no hope of getting better sounds close to what would give a psychological breakdown or suicidal trauma. Sorry if I am intepretating an exaggeration.
And sorry for asking this. But why the poetry?
Well, it's not an exaggeration. I think I could have been diagnosed as legitimately depressed during that time. It gave me the stongest emotional attachment I've ever had in my entire life (heh, says much about how crappy it's been). When it was ripped from me it was like basically half my world was smashed into pieces. I'm not exaggerating here either. I was never suicidal though, cause I don't believe in ending my existence; the chance of actually finding an existence of higher relevancy in some afterlife is too vague.
My feelings for Liara T'Soni have been incomprehensible. I could not and still can't define what it is exactly and in what level I felt for her. At first that hurt me even more. Not being able to define the most relevant experience in my life was like getting a kick in the crotch when you're trying to solve an interesting math problem... only worse.
I can't sit here and talk the night away, but it's fair to say I wan't exaggerating.
Oh, and the "poetry"? That was some mixed up song lyrics from a band I like. The first section was about nightmares, not being able to wake up, wanting to end it all, etc.
The second section was about how love can literally make everything feel better, how we're not in need of this economical satisfaction or personal gain, just to be happy in life.
I look forward to the day when I meet someone that I can come to love. Hope I didn't intimidate you or anything.
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