25715 réponses à ce sujet

[bleetman]

KawaiiKatie wrote...

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

I was going to make a weak joke about there not being enough dicks that are into Shepa-

...Crap. Well, this is awkward.

Modifié par bleetman, 12 juillet 2011 - 02:22 .

[jlb524]

KawaiiKatie wrote...

Chun Hei wrote...

I do not believe that every Asari IS bisexual. They are raised to NOT seek out their own as sexual partners and their society shuns those who do. They are all female. With the social pressure to avoid "pureblood" offspring it is easy to see how the apparent rarity of alien female romance partners could come about, if unintentionally.

Am I the only one who hates the unfortunate implications of discouring an all-lesbian race from reproducing within their own species...?

It's, like... Okay, we have this super-advanced race of lesbians. That's right, lesbians. They've gotten by on millenniums of female-on-female reproduction. They don't need men.

Oh wait, yes they do! In fact, they need men (or femShep) so badly that they discourage themselves from seeking partnerships with one another. Of course, they're still totally attracted to females and they'll totally have that threesome that the player has always wanted, but it's genetically benefitial to not have sex with one another.

It's like... It's like Bioware said to themselves, "Oh, wait, a race of lesbians? No! Lesbians aren't hot! Bisexual women are hot! We have to make men feel needed! So even though the lesbians can reproduce with one another, they really prefer not to. They still need manlovin'."

.......yeah, I have issues with the Asari.

+10

I've been complaining about this forever

[Augoeides]

KawaiiKatie wrote...

Augoeides wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...

@Quething

Yeah, try playing that mission as a gay manShep. Throwing him into a room with a killer vagina? Thanks a lot, Bioware.

Where was my option to sit way, waaaaaaaaaaay on the other side of the couch and use the cushions as a barricade between myself and Morinth? Sheesh....

I have.

It was horrible, almost degrading having to play the part of horny/flirtatious heterosexual male.

Can we get a semi-important mission in ME3 where people have to pretend,(or not pretend) to hit on a gay guy or gal (mission moprhs character to same-sex of Shepard) to finish it? 

RIGHT? UGH. WHY, BIOWARE? WHY?

Especially after the Dark Ritual in DA:O! I'm sorry, but I'll never let that go. It's like, "Oh, yeah, you can be a gay man, but heterosexual sex is where the plot is at, so I'll just be waiting over here without any underwear."

I just... I hated it. Seducing Morinth was awful.

"Hey handsome, wanna come sit over here in the dark with me?"

"Oh, cuddle up with you and your murderous vag? I'd like nothing better... apparently."

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

"What?"

"I mean, art."

Dark Ritual was awful too! I couldn't bring myself to sacrifice Alistair to Archie or Morrigan's magic vagina of old god baby conjuring. In the end my best bet was hardening Alistair (teehee) then betraying his trust in me  to save a certain **** and have him commit the deed instead. 

You know what was just as bad for me? DA2! I was romancing Fenris, like clearly romancing him and people commented on it, even the mother, but that stop her from stating in another conversation to MHawke: We've got our home now to find you a woman/wife, I'll try setting you up with some noble chick"

Which left me all: "Uhhh... bronze skinned elf... you know the one... I'm romancing, you said we were a cute couple... yeah him. He might not deal with me having a wife so well, neither would for that matter."

Morinth deserved to die after she tried to use mind control to make my Gay Shep do her just so she could kill him with deadly Ardat-Yakshi vagina powers.

[Quething]

bleetman wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

I was going to make a weak joke about there not being enough dicks that are into Shepa-

...Crap. Well, this is awkward.

Really, Shep must have some kind of weird pheremone going, is there an asari who hasn't tried to get in those N7 pants? Main!Shep is a lesbian and she's still had more than enough of it (why, why do I have to give Shiala an interested smirk, why), I can't even imagine how hard it must be on dude!Shep (my dude!Shep still hasn't made it to ME2 )

[jeweledleah]

about playing Morinth mission. it wasn't any worse for gay male shepard then it was for a straight femshep. you do what you must to complete the mission... and its not like you actually have to do anything... just chat.

and dark ritual.  at least gay warden can ask Alistair or Logain to do Morrigan.  now imagine how it feels for the fem warden that's romancing Alistair.... yeah, no fun. 

Modifié par jeweledleah, 12 juillet 2011 - 02:32 .

[bleetman]

Shiala gets an interested smirk? I only ever saw an annoyed glare. I'll have to pay more attention next time.

Quething wrote...

Samara does say that if Morinth sees a gun on you she'll run. I'd say it's better addressed than, like, "why did Kasumi come to Hock's party dressed like a thief instead of swanked out as Shep's date" (and see, that would have been a fun use of faking fem!Shep's bisexuality. Kasumi's even totally main!Shep's type).

Yeah, I never really bought that excuse. Hell, half my Shepards wouldn't need a gun anyway. You still have your omni tool with you.

Kasumi's mission is pretty silly, yes. She doesn't even bother cloaking somewhere out of the way. Disappearing whilst walking through the front door isn't very subtle, you know.

(Kasumi herself wasn't really my/my Shepard's 'type' until she, you know, did that whole leaping-onto-a-moving-helicopter-then-backflip-and-land-split-legged thing. It's probably a good thing her on-screen memories don't seem to record all that much. I'm almost terrified to know what manner of carnal acrobatics she got up to with Keiji.)

Modifié par bleetman, 12 juillet 2011 - 02:32 .

[Augoeides]

bleetman wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

I was going to make a weak joke about there not being enough dicks that are into Shepa-

...Crap. Well, this is awkward.

In all the right ways. Now for some dirty dialogue

Conrad: All you had to do was ask Shepard! I'm you're biggest fan (Shepard: O.O you are indeed)
Garrus: I do love a big gun
Thane: /neck puffs and bobs head enthusiastically
Kaidan: I never seen a biotic spike as high as you
Mordin: Direct neural stimulation!
Jacob: The priiiiiiize /alternating crotch shots between Shepard and Jacob
Zaeed: I've never worked a job as big as this


aaaaand...

Can't think of any for Wrex or Grunt.... or anyone else I've missed. .

[KawaiiKatie]

bleetman wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

I was going to make a weak joke about there not being enough dicks that are into Shepa-

...Crap. Well, this is awkward.

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT, YES! I LOVE IT!

Augoeides wrote...

Dark Ritual was awful too! I couldn't bring myself to sacrifice Alistair to Archie or Morrigan's magic vagina of old god baby conjuring. In the end my best bet was hardening Alistair (teehee) then betraying his trust in me  to save a certain **** and have him commit the deed instead.

Oh, I had no problem sacrificing Alistair to Morrigan's vagina. For one thing, he at least LIKES women, unlike my Warden. And I was upfront about it! I told him, "Hey, either you have sex with her, or you die."

And he replied, "....wow, tough call."

You know what was just as bad for me? DA2! I was romancing Fenris, like clearly romancing him and people commented on it, even the mother, but that stop her from stating in another conversation to MHawke: We've got our home now to find you a woman/wife, I'll try setting you up with some noble chick"

Which left me all: "Uhhh... bronze skinned elf... you know the one... I'm romancing, you said we were a cute couple... yeah him. He might not deal with me having a wife so well, neither would for that matter."

Yeah, IDK what was up with that. She said the same thing about my manHawke and Anders. "Oh, you're such a cute couple... hmm I should find you a wife!"

.....no, Mom. Just no.

Morinth deserved to die after she tried to use mind control to make my Gay Shep do her just so she could kill him with deadly Ardat-Yakshi vagina powers.

I don't know about you, but I totally RENEGADE OPTIONED her when she tried to HETERO-BRAINWASH ME.

"YOU KNOW YOU WANT SOME VAGINA! I WILL CONVERT YOUUU~!"

"....nice try. But no."

It was very satisfying.

Quething wrote...

Really, Shep must have some kind of weird pheremone going, is there an asari who hasn't tried to get in those N7 pants? Main!Shep is a lesbian and she's still had more than enough of it (why, why do I have to give Shiala an interested smirk, why), I can't even imagine how hard it must be on dude!Shep (my dude!Shep still hasn't made it to ME2 [smilie]../../../images/forum/emoticons/uncertain.png[/smilie])

Yeah, I can't figure out why manShep is so attractive to every single female in the galaxy, and yet no man ever checks him out once. Playing as a gayShep is.... well, it's.... it's harrowing. I've taken to a a very deep state of denial when it comes to my gayShep, and I just close my eyes really tight and try to ignore how interested manShep looks when Gianna kisses him, or when Shiala kisses him, or when the Consort is all "Mmm, hey baby, let me get close to you and whisper in your ear" and when Liara opens up her arms and wraps him in a hug.

Oh, and when I accidently picked the "Renegade" option when speaking to Ronald Taylor, and my gayShep implied that he would love to set up a "vacation spot" on the planet of willing female slaves and keep himself a harem.

.....that one was particulary bad.

Modifié par KawaiiKatie, 12 juillet 2011 - 02:41 .

[Augoeides]

jeweledleah wrote...

about playing Morinth mission. it wasn't any worse for gay male shepard then it was for a straight femshep. you do what you must to complete the mission... and its not like you actually have to do anything... just chat.

and dark ritual.  at least gay warden can ask Alistair or Logain to do Morrigan.  now imagine how it feels for the fem warden that's romancing Alistair.... yeah, no fun. 

Fair point, the gay male crowd isn't the only one that suffers. I would do well to remember that.

[Augoeides]

@Kawaii

Yeah Shep shooting sexy looks at anything female when it decides to get close to him or for no apparent reason kind of grates on me. Not only does it kind of bash the idea of a gay Shep BUT it has nasty implications of heterosexuality as the base line OR of "Hey a woman, I must be aroused, because I'm such a badass that a woman doesn't even have to appeal to me for me to want to screw her"

[Quething]

bleetman wrote...

Shiala gets an interested smirk? I only ever saw an annoyed glare. I'll have to pay more attention next time.

I suspect it depends on which face structure you use, some of them animate the same expression very differently.

re: Morrigan, I dated her as a fem!Cousland via modding. She wouldn't have gone for the DR anyway, she had some nobility and anti-blood-magic issues with the whole concept, but the idea of convincing Loghain to shag her lover.... yeah, right up there with the poor shmucks dating Alistair. Never fall in love with a BioWare mage, it doesn't end well.

And Leandra... well she's crazy anyway, she actually wanted to live in Kirkwall.

[Augoeides]

Quething wrote...

bleetman wrote...

Shiala gets an interested smirk? I only ever saw an annoyed glare. I'll have to pay more attention next time.

I suspect it depends on which face structure you use, some of them animate the same expression very differently.

re: Morrigan, I dated her as a fem!Cousland via modding. She wouldn't have gone for the DR anyway, she had some nobility and anti-blood-magic issues with the whole concept, but the idea of convincing Loghain to shag her lover.... yeah, right up there with the poor shmucks dating Alistair. Never fall in love with a BioWare mage, it doesn't end well.

And Leandra... well she's crazy anyway, she actually wanted to live in Kirkwall.

I have noticed the animation thing too, but I guess the ultimate face test lies with the Sheploo face, if it looks interested that's what the Bio team intended.

At least Leandra was happy, I mean at least she got to spend the rest of her life there...

I really shouldn't snigger at that but...

Maybe I'll just Loghain to blow himself up this time instead of sleeping with Morrigan, my City Elf does hate nobles after all. 

Modifié par Augoeides, 12 juillet 2011 - 02:55 .

[Abispa]

Chun Hei wrote...

There is only me.

*sigh*

Please leave the Drow out of this. <_<

[ElitePinecone]

Augoeides wrote...

@Kawaii

Yeah Shep shooting sexy looks at anything female when it decides to get close to him or for no apparent reason kind of grates on me. Not only does it kind of bash the idea of a gay Shep BUT it has nasty implications of heterosexuality as the base line OR of "Hey a woman, I must be aroused, because I'm such a badass that a woman doesn't even have to appeal to me for me to want to screw her"

I have a problem with this as well. 

It's not just forcing the player into a (potentially unwanted) entanglement, but it seems to actively assume that Shepard would leer at anything with bewbs and a vaguely female form. 

Very unedifying. At least give us the choice to accept or decline, if only to prevent Shepard from becoming a ridiculous knucle-dragging marine archetype. 

[Abispa]

Anyway, TWO things about the Morinth thing ruined my immersion, and both of them have to do with the "reasons" Morinth would be into Shepard. 1) She's drawn to people who are isolated and alone. Excuse me!? My Shepard can't walk two steps anywhere without having to beat people off with a stick. 2) You are an artist on the battlefield. *shudder* That line has GOT to be one of the stupidest in the who series.

[lietk12]

KawaiiKatie wrote...
and yet no man ever checks him out once.

Conrad Verner? 
Also: maybe wishful thinking, but Legion seems to have some sort of crush on Shep

[Chun Hei]

ElitePinecone wrote...

I have a problem with this as well.

I am not religious in the slightest, but I know more people on this forum complain about Ashley praying than every ME bar having Asari exotic dancers. If Aria wants my Shepard a nice young man to keep me warm she should at least provide Shepard one.

[Abispa]

lietk12 wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...
and yet no man ever checks him out once.

Conrad Verner? 
Also: maybe wishful thinking, but Legion seems to have some sort of crush on Shep

The one thing that REALLY bothers me about Shepard is that it's made me suspicious of EVERY dramatic pause I encounter in a conversation. Visions of creepy toaster sex did flash through my mind.

[silentassassin264]

Augoeides wrote...

bleetman wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

I was going to make a weak joke about there not being enough dicks that are into Shepa-

...Crap. Well, this is awkward.

In all the right ways. Now for some dirty dialogue

Conrad: All you had to do was ask Shepard! I'm you're biggest fan (Shepard: O.O you are indeed)
Garrus: I do love a big gun
Thane: /neck puffs and bobs head enthusiastically
Kaidan: I never seen a biotic spike as high as you
Mordin: Direct neural stimulation!
Jacob: The priiiiiiize /alternating crotch shots between Shepard and Jacob
Zaeed: I've never worked a job as big as this


aaaaand...

Can't think of any for Wrex or Grunt.... or anyone else I've missed. .

Grunt:  That is why I follow you.  You find me big things, Battlemaster.
Legion: There is another hole.

[Augoeides]

lietk12 wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...
and yet no man ever checks him out once.

Conrad Verner? 
Also: maybe wishful thinking, but Legion seems to have some sort of crush on Shep

I see it too on both accounts

@Chun:
Yeah, where are the male dancers? Seriously women go to bars too and In don't think they're all lesbians or bisexuals...

I suppose I could always try and ruin Fist's life more and make him my personal dancer, not very sexy, but potentially seedy and very Renegade.

[Augoeides]

silentassassin264 wrote...

Augoeides wrote...

bleetman wrote...

KawaiiKatie wrote...

"So, tell me about yourself. What're you into?"

"Dicks, mostly."

I was going to make a weak joke about there not being enough dicks that are into Shepa-

...Crap. Well, this is awkward.

In all the right ways. Now for some dirty dialogue

Conrad: All you had to do was ask Shepard! I'm you're biggest fan (Shepard: O.O you are indeed)
Garrus: I do love a big gun
Thane: /neck puffs and bobs head enthusiastically
Kaidan: I never seen a biotic spike as high as you
Mordin: Direct neural stimulation!
Jacob: The priiiiiiize /alternating crotch shots between Shepard and Jacob
Zaeed: I've never worked a job as big as this


aaaaand...

Can't think of any for Wrex or Grunt.... or anyone else I've missed. .

Grunt:  That is why I follow you.  You find me big things, Battlemaster.
Legion: There is another hole.

Pure genius! You deserve an award.

[Chun Hei]

EDIT the stupid.

Modifié par Chun Hei, 12 juillet 2011 - 10:46 .

[Abispa]

Chun Hei wrote...

DR. CHAKWAS: Now you know my secret, Shepard. Mine is bigger than yours. Now get ready to take it like a man.

SMH.

I think it's far creepier if you have the Krogan saying sweet romantic lines (imagine the voices).

GRUNT: You had me at, "Hello."

WREX: You complete me.

WREAV: Be alive with me tonight.

[Quething]

Chun Hei wrote...

I am not religious in the slightest, but I know more people on this forum complain about Ashley praying than every ME bar having Asari exotic dancers. If Aria wants my Shepard a nice young man to keep me warm she should at least provide Shepard one.

Haha, that's another one! For a genius who's managed to read people well enough to rule Omega for centuries, Aria is pretty damn blind to think main!Shep is looking for a nice young man.

As for "artist on the battlefield," well, main!Shep is an accomplished saxophone player and Butcher!Shep paints, so I just kind of handwave that one.

But it's stupid, because it would be really easy to justify Shepard as attractive to Morinth for being Nef's diametric opposite. Nef was a naive victim, someone Morinth could drain dry for the lulz. Shepard, on the other hand, is a fellow predator - a challenge. Morinth sees herself as a persecuted victim, somebody superior to everyone around her, hiding her talents and motives and moving unseen among an ignorant enemy, surrounded by people to be used or fled from, someone admired and loved but never truly understood. If Shepard's pro-Cerberus, into human superiority, they have that sense of superiority in common. If Shepard's anti-Cerberus, slowly corrupting the crew right under TIM's nose, they have that sense of subterfuge and sabotage in common. And Morinth gets to prove her superiority to herself by meeting someone like Shep who tries to beat her at her own game and completely dismantling them. Her dialog in the apartment and most of the interesting
conversation choices in the club reflect that completely and work really well with Shepard, Commander, Badass. Samara trying to sell you as anything else is really incongruous.

Actually it would have worked better if Nef was, in fact, a hardened manipulator herself. For one, it's more consistent with her other targets, particularly Shepard; for two it makes her less sympathetic, with makes Morinth marginally more sympathetic, which makes choosing Morinth over Samara marginally less seriously wtf would you even give us that choice.

[AngelicMachinery]

Chun Hei wrote...

DR. CHAKWAS: Now you know my secret, Shepard. Mine is bigger than yours. Now get ready to take it like a man.

This is the punch line of far too many sex based jokes for my taste,  and,  it has yet too manage a giggle once.