82210 réponses à ce sujet

[krukow]

His suicide made some sense to me. He's the last of his kind. Revenge and he's good.

Miranda's suicide made much less sense to me....

[hot_heart]

I think they could've covered why Miranda couldn't use Liara's resources.

For one, Cerberus knew who she was and it seems like the SB operation may have gotten thrown a bit out of whack when the ship was destroyed. And Cerberus could've been extra careful with counter-intelligence, so any wrong intel could've cost Miranda dearly. I think the 'doors being kicked down' line is supposed to allude to the need for a more subtle approach as well. I know they don't fly the Normandy straight into their targets but I guess its whereabouts draw a lot of attention?

Plus, there's the fact that Miranda is fiercely independent, thought she could do better considering her history with the organisation and didn't want to distract from the all-out war going on. Not sure if it's just if Shepard chides her for going to Sanctuary alone, but she does try and explain that Sanctuary was her fight.

It's not a watertight rationalisation, I'm sure, but I think they could've made some effort. At least have Shepard attempt to convince her.

Modifié par hot_heart, 11 septembre 2012 - 08:53 .

[Sc2mashimaro]

I still think the DLC described in the OP would be super fantastic amazing.

[Steelcan]

BringBackNihlus wrote...

lillitheris wrote...

And, once again, somehow it’s Liara’s fault. It must be tiring to only have one arch-nemesis.

She’s clearly the best Shadow Broker ever, reaching across the boundaries of imagination to infiltrate BioWare to expand her role.

Well, it's not really Liara's fault. She's just a conduit for her husbando, Mac Walters.

. Liara is grossly incompetent as Shadow Broker

[Steelcan]

krukow wrote...

His suicide made some sense to me. He's the last of his kind. Revenge and he's good.

Miranda's suicide made much less sense to me....

. Why did you all make Javik commit suicide?

[lillitheris]

Steelcan wrote...

Liara is grossly incompetent as Shadow Broker

She was clearly successful in diverting attention from herself. Yay for best brokering ever.

[wright1978]

Steelcan wrote...

krukow wrote...

His suicide made some sense to me. He's the last of his kind. Revenge and he's good.

Miranda's suicide made much less sense to me....

. Why did you all make Javik commit suicide?

I didn't intend Javik to commit suicide. Just chose the course of action that my Shep felt(and still feels was right) and that led to Javik to decide upon suicide.

[Steelcan]

lillitheris wrote...

Steelcan wrote...

Liara is grossly incompetent as Shadow Broker

She was clearly successful in diverting attention from herself. Yay for best brokering ever.

. She got beaten to information by TIM. Didn't know about the females on Sur'Kesh, didn't know where Cerberus base was, did not know Sanctuary was a death camp, was blindsided by the coup on the Citadel, amoung other things

Modifié par Steelcan, 11 septembre 2012 - 12:20 .

[jtav]

A fic excerpt from ch. 3. Longer than usual, because I could use some help. My beta and I have gone over the banter, and I'm still not entirely sure of it. Thank him for any hints of sexual tension.

[quote]
I could feel Miranda’s eyes on me and the sun beating down on my head. "Any progress?" she asked.

"Some. Maybe if the organic already had a graybox, we could scan the data inside and use it to project an avatar."

Miranda shook her head. Her face was lined with exhaustion from too many nights in the lab. "Personality storage and transfer is spotty at best. It would take decades for the technology to progress to the level you would need, and that's without the research being illegal anywhere outside of Illium."

"Well, that just means the Alliance needs to get its head out of ass and legalize the research.” I placed my hand over hes. She didn't move it, and the delightful warmth radiated through me. "You'd be able to digitize the mind. Upload it to other bodies when the original becomes ill or injured. Science fiction has been discussing the idea of brain uploading for decades. So why not?"

"Yes, science fiction. Verne and Wells wrote about spaceflight, but they were still long dead by the time humans left the planet. There are real logistical problems. Namely how you would safely update the firmware. And it would be decades more still to research a safe way to interface with the consensus. A monumental undertaking." The ghost of a smile hovered over her lips. "Like Lazarus."

"You aren't the only one who enjoys doing the impossible. I have to be ambitious if I'm going to keep up with the woman who raises the dead. And, after this war is over, maybe we can actually coexist with the geth instead of torturing autistic people because we’re terrified." And maybe I would stop seeing David Archer in my dreams. "And if we take a few steps toward immortality on the way there, so much the better."

"The Reapers are coming, and you're thinking about after the war? The odds of anyone surviving are remote at best. We can't think about the future."

"That's why we have to think about the future. I'm fighting so I can build that better tomorrow. Maybe I'll survive and maybe I won't. Hell, maybe I'll be dead by the time the Reapers get here. But having those plans motivates me to take on those impossible odds. And raise your blood pressure. Trying to talk with the geth without depending on Legion is a very good goal. Just have to figure out a way to do it without going crazy."

"Let me see your notes. If you're going to tilt at windmills, I might as well make sure you do it properly." I passed the notes to her. Her brow furrowed, as she read silently to herself. I watched her. When we had first met, I had vowed to never care what the "Cerberus cheerleader” thought of me or my ideas. But now? I wanted Miranda to see my vision of the future as viable, another tactic for advancing humanity.

"Not bad,” she murmured. "Not bad at all. If I could get this to Brynn, the two of you could make some real progress. I think it would be simpler to simply create a digital avatar and control it with neural impulses. No personality transfer so someone else would have to take those steps to immortality, but we might actually get there within your lifetime instead of within mine."

"No good." I tapped one of the equations. "Lag time from issuing the command to when it’s carried out is 7.3 milliseconds. You’d need to get it down to 3.2 for your way to be viable."

"It's not 7.3. It’s five. You didn't take the derivative properly. See?” I watched in amazement as she reworked my equation and the numbers came out just as she said. "I think we can definitely shave off an additional 1.8 milliseconds in time."

I still stared at the paper. "You... Corrected my math..." It had been years since anyone had corrected my math. I raised my eyes to hers. "You corrected my math?"

Her smile changed to a smirk. "Did I wound your precious ego? The great Commander Shepard confounded because he forgot to carry the two?"

I tossed the paper in the air, pushing myself to my feet. "Screw it. I'm abandoning the project."

She sat upright, rolling her eyes. "Alex…”

I smeared it on thick. "Well, obviously the time I've spent in lockdown has turned my brain to mush. Can't even manage basic high school-level calculus... I should probably just stick with shooting things. Of course... I haven't held a gun in months, either... My aim might be off. Might need to resort to throwing rocks. Have we determined the effectiveness of rock-based projectiles on Reaper forces? You might need to handle the tests, since I'm little more than a gibbering fool in my current-" I barely managed to dodge the pebble she chucked at my head. "Excellent! Already getting started with the trials! I knew I picked the right woman for the job."

She grinned effortlessly, and my heart flipped. Miranda Lawaon: eager, unguarded, and playful. Because of me. Anything to keep her like this. "Of course, I’m going to have to rethink my future. No science means I'll have lots of spare time. Maybe I'll raise sheep? Alexei the shepherd. I think my great uncle raised sheep. Maybe that's too obvious? Goats, then?"

She threw her hands in the air and made to rise from her seat. "I'm leaving. You can pontificate on your bruised ego back in your-"

I swooped in, forcing her back to a prone position with my face just inches from hers. "Please, solnste, I'm an 'arrogant, maddening fool,' remember? My ego..." The gentle scent of pine needles wafted off of her. "Is perfectly intact."

She cocked one eyebrow up. "So you'll still be accepting my invitations to the wilderness every so often, then?"

"Of course," I grinned, lowering my voice. "It's good to have some, ah... stimulation every now and-"

She scoffed, pushing my face away from hers.

"Mental stimulation, of course!" I pulled her hand away from my face and smiled. Leaning down, I pressed my lips to hers. "I want you around." Again. "To correct my math." And again. "To keep me from making stupid mistakes." And again. The tip of her tongue played along my lips, sending a pleasant shiver down my spine. "You really think it's viable?"

She nodded. "You'd have to create an actual prototype, but, yes, I think it's doable. Theoretically." Excitement surged through her voice like electricity. I'd like to think it had something to do with me being on top of her, but I think I know her better than that. "This could be the biggest advancement in artificial intelligence since the creation of the geth. Possibilities for diplomacy and espionage. And, yes, possible advances toward eventual true brain uploading."

[lillitheris]

It reads just fine for the most part.

The couple paragraphs about the future are a little too grandiose. If you can tone down the rhetoric to just a little more down to earth, that’d be better. Maybe try to anchor the greater sentiments into something concrete?

It should take her longer to go through any significant notes.

‘hes’ -> ‘his’. Did you mean ‘the delightful warmth’ or a? Same for ‘the ghost of a smile’.

[Ieldra]

Beautiful, jtav. And funny. Two problems:

(1) In the first part it's not always clear who's speaking.
(2) I'd need some context for the science parts. What exactly are they trying to do? Right now I mean, not the prospects for future advancement.

Did I say I like Alex? He's quite unlike your other Shepards. As for the banter, I'm hearing the part after "I smeared it on thick" as some kind of staccato, almost like Mordin speaking. However, that's not obvious enough so that this paragraph comes across as somewhat long-ish at first reading. Shaving off a few words might be preferable. Apart from that, the banter works well.

Also, I like the "grandiose" visions and would dislike a more "down-to-earth" version. 

Modifié par Ieldra2, 11 septembre 2012 - 01:48 .

[hot_heart]

lillitheris wrote...
‘hes’ -> ‘his’.

Unless I'm reading it wrong, I think it should be 'hers'.

In addition.

'Alliance needs to get its head out of its ass'

'Namely, how you would safely update the firmware' (though that's prescriptive comma usage, I guess)

'I had vowed never to never care'

'I think it would be simpler to simply create' - Just reads a little odd with simple and simpler almost next to one another.

[lillitheris]

I didn’t really feel the flow of discussion was problematic—but to be prudent, you should only ever have narration from the perspective of the same person speaking in a given paragraph.

I.e., instead of

"It's not 7.3. It’s five. You didn't take the derivative properly. See?” I watched in amazement as she reworked my equation and the numbers came out just as she said. "I think we can definitely shave off an additional 1.8 milliseconds in time."

"It's not 7.3. It’s five. You didn't take the derivative properly. See?”

I watched in amazement as she reworked my equation and the numbers came out just as she said. "I think we can definitely shave off an additional 1.8 milliseconds in time."

[Taboo]

BringBackNihlus wrote...
ALL YOU CAN EAT GRIMDARK

YES. YES.

@jtav This is the blonde Shepard yes? The Russian? I'm trying to picture this in my head as you have so many. Your banter works really well. It's nice to see a Shepard that can match wits with Miranda.

As for missing or weird character parts, I don't think it should came as a surprise that some issues with characterization occur in ME3. I'm looking for a similar aspect to be restored if Miranda ever gets DLC but I'm not convinced it will be the same as she was in ME2. But that's just a thought. Time will tell if anything occurs.

Modifié par Taboo-XX, 11 septembre 2012 - 02:38 .

[hot_heart]

Taboo-XX wrote...
I'm looking for a similar aspect to be restored if Miranda ever gets DLC but I'm not convinced it will be the same as she was in ME2.

I just want to see her with a gun. Talking down to people, shooting things and throwing enemies about.

[Taboo]

hot_heart wrote...

Taboo-XX wrote...
I'm looking for a similar aspect to be restored if Miranda ever gets DLC but I'm not convinced it will be the same as she was in ME2.

I just want to see her with a gun. Talking down to people, shooting things and throwing enemies about.

Thinking on it earlier I'm more convinced that certain aspects were never meant to end up in ME3 at all. The character was meant to do this. She still has the ideals but she's levelled out in ME3 due to Shepard's influence just like Jack.

The issue is is that she never mentions any of it and never relally does anything except talk about her sister or Shepard. If we had a DLC with her blowing **** up with Shepard and talking about past Cerberus actions I think we'd be okay.

But she'll never be the same as she was in the beginning of ME2. That alignment shift comes into focus now. Same ideals, different execution.

[flemm]

Taboo-XX wrote...

Thinking on it earlier I'm more convinced that certain aspects were never meant to end up in ME3 at all. The character was meant to do this. She still has the ideals but she's levelled out in ME3 due to Shepard's influence just like Jack.

I think, based on ME2, they were leaving their options open. However, some sort of shift or re-evaluation makes sense, along the lines of Jack. That's why leading a group of ex-Cerberus operatives is a logical choice. Ideally, that's what we will see in a DLC.

[Taboo]

flemm wrote...

Taboo-XX wrote...

Thinking on it earlier I'm more convinced that certain aspects were never meant to end up in ME3 at all. The character was meant to do this. She still has the ideals but she's levelled out in ME3 due to Shepard's influence just like Jack.

I think, based on ME2, they were leaving their options open. However, some sort of shift or re-evaluation makes sense, along the lines of Jack. That's why leading a group of ex-Cerberus operatives is a logical choice. Ideally, that's what we will see in a DLC.

I've been mulling that idea over since I first played the game. There has been a re-evaluation and shift. This would explain certain things but it doesn't excuse others.

I think we'd see a lot of talk about what Cerberus should have been and what it was. Perhaps some reflection on past decisions that may have since been re-evaluated by Miranda.

I also feel that's why, and you said it best, she would start over post war with an organization. Similar principles, new shape and form. Shepard being there might lend to some credibility as well.

[flemm]

Taboo-XX wrote...

I've been mulling that idea over since I first played the game. There has been a re-evaluation and shift. This would explain certain things but it doesn't excuse others.

I think we'd see a lot of talk about what Cerberus should have been and what it was. Perhaps some reflection on past decisions that may have since been re-evaluated by Miranda.

I also feel that's why, and you said it best, she would start over post war with an organization. Similar principles, new shape and form. Shepard being there might lend to some credibility as well.

Well, personally, I've always argued that Miranda leaving Cerberus would be an important part of her character arc. It should be a good thing and allow the character to grow in a positive way. (Back before the leak, some fans did argue that she should remain with Cerberus, but that was with the idea in mind that Cerberus would remain morally gray in ME3. Of course now everyone agrees she should oppose the ME3 version.)

I find that a good comparison, for me personally, is another pop sci-fi character I like a lot, a certain Kira Nerys from one of the Star Trek shows. She's not that well-known, so I'll outline. Basically she starts out as a terrorist/resistant fighter against an occupying military power, so she's had a hard life, seen and done horrible things. There's strength there, passion, and her goals are good, but the methods have at times been horrible. There's a lot of pain and scarring there. She has a lot of emotional moments, sometimes she's abrasive and angry.

Of course, a lot of people liked that character from the start, and were passionate about her. Others reacted very negatively, because she had an abrasive side, etc.

It's a seven-season show, so what happens in the middle is there is a period of "softening": the character is still an officer and still has responsabilities and everything, but the episodes involving her tend to focus on romance, her outfit becomes more sexy, she drifts more toward a standard female character, whereas at the beginning she's unusual and exciting.

So, at that point, people who loved Kira at the start complained a lot. They thought she was losing her "edge," becoming more stereotypical. And they were probably right. But also you could see it as a natural part of her character arc: she had a comfortable life for the first time, and a chance to relax a bit.

Anyway, in the later seasons, what happens is the writers recover a bit and start to blend "early Kira" with "middle seasons Kira": she gets her edge back, she toughens up again, the writing focuses more on her controversial past, but her perspective has changed since her early days.

Her final character arc is particularly strong: her old enemy (the occupying power) has been defeated by another military power and is now the oppressed, occupied power. So, she is sent there to lead a resistance movement on behalf of her old enemies. Similar situation, but the goals are larger now, more mature: instead of just her own freedom, or her people's freedom, it's against all oppression she is fighting (even the oppression of those who used to be her enemies)

By the end she's as fully-realized a character as I can recall having seen in pop sci-fi. It's rare to see something like that handled so well, admittedly, in this type of entertainment. But anyway, Miranda's story arc should work along those lines. An initial hardness, intermediary "softening" or re-evaluation, and then a final "mature" period, where the two experiences are blended.

Modifié par flemm, 11 septembre 2012 - 06:20 .

[wright1978]

flemm wrote...

Taboo-XX wrote...

Thinking on it earlier I'm more convinced that certain aspects were never meant to end up in ME3 at all. The character was meant to do this. She still has the ideals but she's levelled out in ME3 due to Shepard's influence just like Jack.

I think, based on ME2, they were leaving their options open. However, some sort of shift or re-evaluation makes sense, along the lines of Jack. That's why leading a group of ex-Cerberus operatives is a logical choice. Ideally, that's what we will see in a DLC.

Well i think there's beena  slight re-evaluation in methodology as evidenced by control chip convo. The line in the sand of what is acceptable may have moved marginally but she's still very much the independent outsider with little time for the Alliance. I love the Cerberus renegades concept(as it salvages somewhat the horrible mostly onesided Oriana one mangling her character got) as it gives her something proper i can imagine her doing in the 1st half of ME3 and i can very much see her taking that band of renegades and turning them into what cerberus could have been rather than what TIM turned it into. Very glad she didn't get a jack like Alliance makeover too.

[enayasoul]

Deep Space 9... I loved that show! Totally agree with you Flemm about Kira's character arc...

Modifié par enayasoul, 11 septembre 2012 - 04:52 .

[lillitheris]

Cerberus was never morally gray.

[Steelcan]

lillitheris wrote...

Cerberus was never morally gray.

. I Whole heartedly disagree with that