Whew! I finally caught up w/ this thread! I'm away for 2 days & I get 10 pgs behind...this thread is really moving!
Oh...so much to say...hmmm...where to begin:blush:
I was wondering where it says that it has been 6-12 mos. since Arrival. I have continually heard & read in various interviews w/ Casey Hudson that ME3 takes place only a couple of mos. after Arrival (specifically, 2 mos. in some interviews). The 6-12 mos seems like too much time...2 mos makes more sense, imo. If anyone could provide a link where it says 6-12 mos I'd appreciate it.
As far as Kaidan & Shep's relationship progression goes, I think that the time during ME1 was used to specifically build a closer friendship or romantic relationship. I think it's to be assumed that they had a building friendship @ the beginning of ME1, & that throughout ME1 they become closer and eventually build a romance. I remember reading somewhere that Kaidan greatly respects & shows interest in Shepard from the start. She is like his "love @ first sight" relationship...they have great chemistry!

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Also, does anyone actually know how long ME1 is supposed to be...a year, 6 mos...etc?
I also take into consideration the time before the game starts. When Shep & Kaidan are first given their orders & assigned to the Normandy. There must have been a good deal of time from the Normandy's commissioning process & ceremony, first couple of trial runs, to the time before their first shakedowwn run. I know that in the Navy, there's a long process to commission a new ship. Using that info, there was a good amount of time for Shep & Kaidan to get to know each other & become friends. Then ME1 is used to become closer & to build a romance. Regardless of how short their actual romantic relationship was, they'd have a good foundation from before. Generally it takes less time to build a romantic relationship when there is already a foundation of friendship.
When it comes to Kaidan outranking Shep...I see a few possibilities. For one, we know that Shep is returning to the Alliance...maybe they finally promote her (likely after the trial & the Reapers invade but still). If she's not promoted, she's still a Spectre and a hero...most will listen to Shep. Also, Kaidan respects Shep...he may not agree w/ every decision, but he respects her/him and all s/he has accomplished. I think based on that & the fact that the crew will go to hell & back for Shep, Kaidan will defer to her...unless Shep does something he his 100% against. In that case I see him trying to persuade her & if not going on his own.
In ME3, I don't think that Kaidan will be angry w/ Shep about working w/ Cerberus (unless you saved the Collector base...in which case I see him objecting) & about the events in Arrival. I think that the events in ME1, his missions during ME2, & becoming a Spectre have likely opened his eyes to the fact that in the upper echelons there are many difficult decisions, some w/ no good answer but a choice must be made nonetheless. Even Hackett was understanding. Hackett, Anderson, and even Udina see the necessity of making hard decisions and having to, in Shep's words, "do the dirty jobs." Even in ME1, Kaidan follows Shep a breaks regs to stop the greater threat. He confesses that he wouldn't be there, supporting Shep, if he didn't believe in what they were doing. I think this shows Kaidan's logical side. He may be an Alliance soldier to the core, but he knows that there are times when oaths/regs must be broken in order to keep what they are sworn & want to protect.
If anything, I think Kaidan will regret those choices ever having to be made...knowing still that they had to be made.
As for Shep & Kaidan's relationship in ME3...I see them spending a small amount of time coming to terms w/ events in ME2 & then moving forward. They would have to...the world is at war. They'll have to decide to resolve it somewhat quickly or put it aside for later bc they have bigger problems to worry about.
When I first played ME2 & completed Horizon, I got the feeling that Shep & Kaidan had officially ended it w/ a possibility of picking it up again later. Bc of this, in a couple of my playthroughs my Shep romanced other characters. Esp. after talking to Kelly about Horizon, Shep has the option to say that her & Kaidan have moved on. Therefore, beginning a new relationship shouldn't be a problem. Now however, in interviews Casey Hudson has said that cheating on a LI in ME2 will have neg. consequesnces in ME3!

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What!

I thought they "moved on"! Now I come to find my Shep has been cheating...nnoooo...what the heck:blink:...

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Obviously, the writers intended for any relationshiop from ME1 to be valid throughout ME2. I also read recently that there is no way to end a relationship from ME1 in ME2 (exceptions for LotSB), meaning Shep and LI from ME1 are still technically together... so complicated:mellow:

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However, this makes sense then why there may be a possibilty for marriage in ME3.
Lastly (finally right?), I don't think of Shep as a clone. I don't see Cerberus bringing Shep back as unrealistic. I've read the ME books and the universe is supposed to have progressed exponetially...esp. in the realm of science. The avg life span is longer and medicine is greatly advanced. After reading the books I could see how bringing back Shep was possible...highly risky, costly, & unlikely, but possible. I mean they're using cutting edge technology...like the eezo>super glue:D.