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[Aurora313]

Top Ashley

Modifié par Aurora313, 12 octobre 2011 - 08:30 .

[Aurora313]

CptData wrote...

Mr. Brainheart wrote...

@Data; Great job, the thought that this is supposed to happen during war with the reapers, fight for the survival of all the species in the galaxy is rather amusing.

Also I think this calls for a part two and as a suggestion: I'd love to see Vega attempting to get them back in line, by using some harsh military language.

I dunno if I'm going to write part II. At least I won't do it alone *g* - Aurora comes up with great ideas ... and I like to continue them. Of course - Roxanna will be Aurora's baby forever

She be mine, she is.


edit: She also supports Vega's ginger kitten.

Modifié par Aurora313, 12 octobre 2011 - 08:31 .

[CptData]

Aurora313 wrote...

Joker: Shepard - not sure if this is crappy timing or not, but Miranda and Ash are having a... disagreement.
Shepard: For the love of christ - why, this time?
Joker: Same old, same old.
Shepard: Ashley and Roxanna get along, why can't Ashley and Miranda get along?
Joker: Because Roxanna wants to get into Vega's pants, not yours and I just realised who I was talking to and now I will shut up.
Shepard: Good move.
Joker: What do you wanna do?
Shepard: I dunno. Do you have any beer? or popcorn?
Joker: *turns towards him.* I like how you think.
Shepard: Thank you. Do you have booze or not?
Joker: Mini-bar under co-pilot seat.
Shepard: Cool. Punch it up on main viewer here, might as well make a show out of it. *passes beer to Joker and one for himself.*
Joker: Catfight!
Shepard: I'll drink to that.

*a little later*

Joker: Sir ... we should rename the Normandy.
Shepard: Any ideas for a new name?
Joker: "SSV Flyin' Pub"
Shepard: Hmm ... nope. Doesn't hit.
Joker: "SSV Catfight"?
Shepard: Close, but no cigar.
Joker: Hmm ... no idea then. Another glas of good ol' 30 year whiskey (authentic Glenfiddich).
Shepard: Nope, that's the good stuff. Don't wanna waste it ...
Joker: Your decision. I'll go for vodka instead.
Shepard: Ale sounds good enough for me.
Joker: Sure. Uhh ... I got another name for the Normandy!
Shepard: Shoot!
Joker: "SSV Hellcat"
Shepard: That's it. We rename her to "SSV Hellcat".
EDI: I hate you.

*meanwhile*

Kelly: So, you two came to me. What's your problem?
Miranda: I'm hotter than Williams, but Shepard claims she's the most beautiful woman he ever saw.
Ashley: Win! WIN!
Miranda: Any ideas how to change that? Except throwing her out of an Airlock, I mean.
Ashley: Watch it, pale lady.
Kelly: I hate my job ...

----> put here short flic how Ash & Miranda end up fighting together with Shepard in Brainheats dialogue.

Modifié par CptData, 12 octobre 2011 - 08:52 .

[Mr. Brainheart]

I really meant either of you anyway

It's been a while since I've felt compelled to do a little dialogue, I'm already out of it . Regardless a continuation of the Miranda/Ashley battle:

In the heat of battle Shepard Ashley and Miranda suddenly encounter an atlas:
Shepard: Damn that atlas has me pinned down good! Ashley get behind that small wall just behind the plants and try to aim for the weak spots, the joints.
Ashley: I'm on it Skipper!
Miranda: So why does she get to do everything? I hate preferential treatment, Shepard, I can easily take that atlas out too.
Shepard: dear lord, can this wait? We’re under fire!
Miranda: No, This seems like the perfect time to settle this.
Ashley: Maybe it's because I can properly aim a Sniper-rifle, whilst you already have trouble holding a handgun?
Miranda: Pff, your fancy rifle is no match for my biotics.
Ashley: Admit it you're useless on a distance of a few hundred meters. I'm surprised Shepard took you along anyway.
Shepard: You two knock it o-
Miranda: You see, you give her one task and she immediately thinks it's about her being superior.
Shepard: Ladies! Focu-
Ashley: I wasn't the one complaining Miss ‘Superiority complex’!
Miranda:  You want to see superiority? Just watch this! *Miranda jumps out of cover and dives from wall to wall closing in on the atlas*
Shepard: Damn it Miranda, stay put!
Miranda: Oh, so you care about my wellbeing is that it? That's rather sweet Shepard, but I know how to take care of myself.
Ashley: Pf, this has nothing to do with your wellbeing, if that was the case you’d be the one sniping from a safe distance right now.
Shepard: It’s because I value both of your live-
Miranda: You are just leading us on aren’t you, you just don’t want to say which of us is superior, I’ve had enough of this!
Ashley: So have I! *She swiftly aims and fires, hitting the glass protecting the driver at just the right spot for it to crack. She fires again, the glass breaks, but her gun overheats from the quick firing.*
Miranda: Ha! *she flings the Cerberus driver up in the air with a mighty biotic swing, only to let him land on the ground with a hard smack.* There I did it.
Ashley: No I took the initiative and did all the hard work!
Miranda: You tell her who did it Shepard!
Shepard: You two did it together.

Ashley & Miranda: That’s what a coward would say!
 
Later on the Normandy:
Joker: Commander, you’ve gotta tell me, how did you make it out alive, with…well, those two? I could use some advice on that.
Shepard: You just have to know how to put their unstoppable passion for you to good use and point it towards the enemy.
Joker: So. It was luck that got you out then.
Shepard: …You need to be a commander to understand how you plan to make it out alive with those two, Joker, you wouldn’t understand.
EDI: Yes Jeff, he means luck.

Modifié par Mr. Brainheart, 12 octobre 2011 - 08:50 .

[Lanfo]

Hello all new here, gotta say u guys r funny been reading this thread few hours straight and not even tired. especially love the dialogues done by capt and aurora and brainheart :0

[Aurora313]

Pierce: Hey Girls. Whatcha doing?
Miranda: It's no concern of yours.
Ashley: Yea. It's nothing Roxanna, back off.
Pierce: Ain't sounding like nothing. What's going on, girls?
EDI: Officer Lawson and Lieutenant Williams are currently violently arguing over who is the holder of Commander Shepard's affections.
Pierce: Oooooh. Thank you EDI.
Ashley: Miranda here seems to think that she's quote-unquote 'Hotter' than me.
Miranda: It's not what I think it's truth.
Ashley: Back off Miranda! I saw Shepard first!
Miranda: I spent two years, count them - TWO, trying my damnedest to bring Shepard back to life while you two continued with your life like nothing happened!
Pierce: That is enough! Both of you stand down!
Ashley: You think I'm gonna -
Miranda: Commander, you can't possibly -
Pierce: SHUT UP! Both of you! Seven hells. Miranda - as someone who claims to be the 'genetically perfect' woman, you're acting like a typical brat. Ashley, your acting even worse! You are supposed to be mature adults! John loves you! And Miranda - Get the hell over it! That is an order!

Both of you keep the hell AWAY from each other, or for the love of the gods I will rip you two to peices with my bare hands! And unlike your little pissing contest here - I will f*cking do it.

*cockpit area.*
Joker: Wow... no wonder your scared of her.
Shepard: *nodds furiously*
Joker: Should I feel sorry for Vega?
Shepard: Um... She killed two SFs and crippled a third when we were in basic. Back when we were 19.
Joker: Jesus! I feel sorry for him now.
Shepard: Probably the safer option.

Modifié par Aurora313, 12 octobre 2011 - 09:47 .

[Aurora313]

Lanfo wrote...

Hello all new here, gotta say u guys r funny been reading this thread few hours straight and not even tired. especially love the dialogues done by capt and aurora and brainheart :0

Welcome to the Forum, glad you enjoy our dialogues

[CptData]

Shepard: You know, sometimes I just want to go back to good ol' days.
Joker: Hunting Saren? As I said before ... it was hell.
Shepard: Yeah, it was, but far easier than what we're facing now.
Joker: An incredible huge fleet of Reapers that's going to invade Earth?
Shepard: Worse.
Joker: Knowing we won't make it in time before every last one is killed?
Shepard: Worse.
Joker: Still that Ashley-Miranda stuff.
Shepard: You've got it.
Joker: *sigh* You know my bar will be empty BEFORE our job is done.
Shepard: Yep. Still - good ol' days. Just Ashley and me. Liara wasn't a real problem, she understood why I had a thing for Ash.
Joker: And Miranda doesn't.
Shepard: Yup. I hope Pierce was able to put some sense in Miranda & Ash. BEFORE someone gets hurt. Propably me. Or that relationship between Ash and me.
Joker: By the way ... any plans once the job is done?
Shepard: You mean children, house and such?
Joker: Yup.
Shepard: Not yet. Hadn't much time to think about it ... at least not enough for anything serious. And I'm sure Ash wasn't thinking too much about it as well.
Joker: ... and Miranda ... ?
Shepard: Don't know what she has in her mind, somehow, I don't wanna know.
Joker: The lesser we know, the better we can sleep.
Shepard: That points it out.

[V-rex]

Well, this is probably going to be my last post for a while. I've been lucky on my Japan holiday so far, being in areas with internet access. But come tomorrow I'll be heading to areas where internet connection will be much more limited, so I won't be as able to post.

So anyway, as a closing statement for the next few days:
Ashley is awesome!

[Mr. Brainheart]

V-rex wrote...

Well, this is probably going to be my last post for a while. I've been lucky on my Japan holiday so far, being in areas with internet access. But come tomorrow I'll be heading to areas where internet connection will be much more limited, so I won't be as able to post.

So anyway, as a closing statement for the next few days:
Ashley is awesome!

Agreed.  (and have fun)

Hi there Lanfo!

[Aurora313]

Shepard: I'm heading out, Garrus and Ashley are coming with me.
Pierce: Alright, I'll keep the seat warm while you're out.
Shepard: No.
Pierce: 'No'?
Shepard: Don't think I stuttered.
Pierce: Why not?
Shepard: Because you're going to have a chat with Chambers.
Pierce: What? Why?
Shepard: Roxanna, are you seriously asking me that question?
Pierce: I think it's ridiculous!
Shepard: You threatened to tear Miranda and Ashley - my partner - to pieces with your bare hands! You need to talk things out with someone!
Pierce: I'd sooner tongue a varren.
Shepard: Fine - let me put it another way. Talk your problems through with someone, or you're relieved from duty until further notice.
Pierce: Wha - You can't do that!
Shepard: I already did.
Pierce: What the sh!t!
Shepard: In the time you spend arguing with me is time you could spend talking to someone and getting reinstated.
Pierce: 'Reinstatement' says the felon.
Shepard: Just do it, Roxanna.
Pierce: ... *walks off with barely controlled anger.*
Ashley: Is she going to be Ok?
Shepard: I am scare of her for good reason, Ashley. Last thing I want her to do is skin two of my best fighters alive.

Modifié par Aurora313, 12 octobre 2011 - 10:49 .

[CptData]

Have fun, V-rex *waves* 


*meanwhile in the cargobay*

Wrex: I don't understand this.
Grunt: Yes. Doesn't make much sense.
Wrex: If I were Shepard, I'd take both and start a new clan.
Grunt: had something different in my mind.
Wrex: And what?
Grunt: Lets put them into a fighting pit. Williams should get a broadsword and Lawson an axe.
Wrex: Son, you have much to learn. About female human. And breeding.
Grunt: I'm a soldier, Wrex. Point me the direction and I'll kill everything standing in my path.
Wrex: Okeer didn't tell you anything about breeding, hmm?
Grunt: Fight! Fight! He showed me everything I need to know. Kill Turians! Kill Salarians! Kill ...
Wrex: Dunno what gave me that idea to accept you as new member of Urdnot. Doesn't matter now. Son, have to teach you some important stuff ...

*several hours later*

Wrex: ... and that's where little Krogan come from.
Grunt: Yuk. That was nasty. Fornax is bad enough, but the vids you showed me ...
Wrex: But that's how it's done. No secrets. Just let nature take the lead!
Grunt: It is disgusting. Especially the part with those human females ...
Wrex: As long as you got the message, everything is fine. Doing that is not only fun, but also for recreation.
Grunt: Did you ... do such stuff?
Wrex: Of course! I'm a proud father of two healthy boys and one girl!
Grunt: And all with different fertile women?
Wrex: Indeed.
Grunt: So I guess I got the point. Shepard should have Williams and Lawson to spread his genes?
Wrex: Indeed, son.
Grunt: I'm going to tell them. And Kelly. And Jack ... the more genes Shepard spreads, the more we'll defeat our enemies! I have a mission!
Wrex: Stop! No!
Grunt: *leaves room*
Wrex: Shepard is going to kill him. And me. And everyone else ... a glorious death!

Modifié par CptData, 12 octobre 2011 - 10:51 .

[Mr. Brainheart]

^ Bahaha, that was hilarious! I can only hope he won't tell Pierce, she doesn't seem to be in a good mood right now..

[Aurora313]

Does anyone like going to a shrink with anger issues? I think not. Besides - Roxanna isn't exactly in the Shepard fan-club atm.

[CptData]

Your turn now with next dialogue. I wonder if anyone of the Normandy's crew is still alive once Pierce is done with Ashley, Miranda, Shepard ...

Why's Pierce not in that "Shepard fan club"? Any bad events in the past? Or does "being a friend" NOT qualify for being part of that club

[Aurora313]

He told her that she was relieved of duty until she talks to a shrink. That's a big +9999999 rivalry points in Roxanna's book.

Modifié par Aurora313, 12 octobre 2011 - 11:16 .

[CptData]

Aurora313 wrote...

He told relieved her of duty until she talks to a shrink. That's a big +9999999 rivalry points in Roxanna's book.

So basically Shepard is in this situation:

- Miranda and Ashley fighting to get in his pants
- Miranda is mad since Ashley is "the most beautiful woman" in Shepard's eyes
- Ashley is mad since Shepard claims "Miranda being hotter".
- Both are mad at Pierce 'cause she tried to put some sense in their minds.
- Pierce is mad at them because they act like brats.
- Pierce is mad at Shepard because he thinks she's insane and needs to see a shrink.

Would say, situation is FUBAR.

- Oh ... not to forget Grunt running around telling every female crewmember it's a good idea to mate with Shepard for galaxy's sake.

Anyone feel the urge to hit that SELFDESTRUCTION button?

Modifié par CptData, 12 octobre 2011 - 11:22 .

[Aurora313]

I know. Shepard has such a wonderful way with women, doesn't he?

[Aurora313]

*zip*

Modifié par Aurora313, 12 octobre 2011 - 10:48 .

[Complistic]

I don't suppose we could take the role playing dialogue into the Ash group or something? It's sort of cluttering up the thread. Plus if I was new and wanted to see what the Ashley thread was about, I'd me slightly off-put.

But maybe that's just me.

[CptData]

Seems just you
Besides that, there was a nice discussion going yesterday - too bad I was in bed then *g*

Guess unless we get any new intel on Ash in ME3, we might run out of stuff to talk about and therefore, writing dialogues help to keep the thread active. Somehow. Ash approves


Lets talk about this question:

Should BW allow the player to choose his favorite squadmate being part of his/her crew permanently? In our case it'll be Spectre Williams for sure.

[hotdogbsg]

CptData wrote...

Seems just you
Besides that, there was a nice discussion going yesterday - too bad I was in bed then *g*

Guess unless we get any new intel on Ash in ME3, we might run out of stuff to talk about and therefore, writing dialogues help to keep the thread active. Somehow. Ash approves


Lets talk about this question:

Should BW allow the player to choose his favorite squadmate being part of his/her crew permanently? In our case it'll be Spectre Williams for sure.

Can't see that happening in my opinion with about 15 previous squadmates being potentially available.

Also agree with Complistic about moving the dialouge to a group. But then I'm just the newbie on the thread.

Modifié par hotdogbsg, 12 octobre 2011 - 02:53 .

[Mr. Brainheart]

@Complistic; I understand where you are coming from and perhaps it does refrain some people from posting, then I'd encourage them to speak up. So far though from what I've seen there haven't been any other complaints, Besides that, it's usually during the slumber hours anyway, the thread often get's more lively a bit further in the day.

@Data; Yes, but I think it's an unrealistic proposal, since there are so many squaddies over ME1&ME2 they'd have to cater to all of their fans. If you'd only be able to choose from the main ME3 squad then it'd be a little different, but I wouldn't even pick Ashley persé, if otherwise she gets her own ship and the acknowledgement that she deserves and strives for, then it'd be a hard choice for my canon. In some other playthroughs it would undoubtedly be her though.

[Meldwyn301]

I can't see choosing anyone else but Ash to be at my side on every mission in ME3, if given the choice! I don't mind variety for the third slot though!

[CptData]

Dunno. Ash will be my most-used squadmate in ME3 if possible, but not on every mission - depends on the mission.

Since I prefer Infiltrator Ash!Soldier is a good mate in nearly every situation. The other squadmate could be either a pure Biotic, a pure Tech or a mixed class. I'll give Vega a chance to show his skills, most likely when Ash is not available.