In coms room.
???: Complete and utter blasphemy!
Ashley: Doctor, please. Just calm down.
???: I will not remain calm until you explain why you are lying to me, Commander. A devote christain such as yourself should know that the Lord is the only one capable of raising the dead.
Shepard: *sitting down on a chair leaning on the conference table* Perhaps you should examine the findings more closely.
Ashley: *looks at him, noticing the cheeky glint in his eye.*
Shepard: I've read them, and was quite frankly amazed at how they pulled something so miraculous off.
???: Then what of this program's subject?! This 'Subject Lazarus'. I even shudder to say the name. It's a mockery to the bible.
Ashley: Wow. And people called me a zealot.
???: Welll what became of this... thing thing. This subject.
Shepard: *stone-faced.*
Ashley: Wish to examine the results?
???: It is my moral and ethical duty to terminate them for the sake of their humanity.
Ashley: Oh, he's someone we all know pretty well. That is, me and the crew. The Major here is especially close to him.
Shepard: Close isn't how I would describe it, Commander.
???: It matters not! Tell me who it is, blast it.
Ashley: *sigh* Should we tell him?
Shepard: Yes. I think we should. See; this man he's a Major, much like myself. Shockingly handsome. Burdened with an overabundance of schooling. *Ash looks away, trying not to snicker or giggle* Amazingly quite wit. Tactically brilliant. Plays the guitar like a pro.
He has a vessel. Much like this one. Very advanced and very cutting edge with the power of a small fleet behind it and an AI running it all to boot. Right now, he's sitting down, twiddling his thumbs and wanting to snap a certain doctor into tiny pieces.
???: *Anger, then confusion which fades into horrified realisation.* I think I'll just go.
Shepard: Buh-bye now.
???: *runs out*
Ashley: *still holding in giggles. Shepard looks at her, stonefaced as ever. Holds for a moment before he leans forward, resting his forehead his arms. A second later, he bursts out laughing. Ash joins him* Hah! That was cruel! You are physcotic! Hahaha!!
Shepard: Awwh! *leans back in his chair, whiping tears out of his eyes.* Oh. I'm such a bad ma- Aahahahaa!!!
Ashley: I love you, John. You. Are. Horrible! Ahaha!