19887 réponses à ce sujet

[DineBoo]

I'm sure there are full page ads in Formax relating to chafing issues

[HelenMac321]

EvelinShepard wrote...

HelenMac321 wrote...

EvelinShepard wrote...

Just had a disturbing thought. Does Garrus's... you know... does that chafe too?

I'm not sure I'm disturbed or intrigued by where that thought train has taken me. Oh dear. Look what this thread has turned me into 

They'll have to use extra lube.

Edit: This thread is a magnificent place full of wonderous turians and beautiful people

I'm sure the extra lube is on the shelf next to the Turian/Human anti-chaffing sexy time omni-gel.

And I love what I've been turned into! Who wants a human anyways...

EDIT: And my Shepard definitely purchased Formax in ME2. It's probably still hanging aroung her cabin somewhere in 3. Maybe that's what Garrus was reading when Shep wakes up from the dream 

Modifié par HelenMac321, 16 mars 2012 - 03:41 .

[Karrie788]

EvelinShepard wrote...

HelenMac321 wrote...

yukidama wrote...

DineBoo wrote...

I wonder if they sell things in the ME universe for chafing? Premium grade chapstick for kissing?

Where do you think all the omni-gel went? Shepard is hoarding it.

A Turian/Human anti-chaffing sexy time omni-gel? I'd love to see that on the shelves in the Citadel commons. 

Just had a disturbing thought. Does Garrus's... you know... does that chafe too?

.... I.... well down there it's... rather...

No. I don't want to finish that sentence.

[General Tiberius]

EvelinShepard wrote...

HelenMac321 wrote...

A Turian/Human anti-chaffing sexy time omni-gel? I'd love to see that on the shelves in the Citadel commons. 

Just had a disturbing thought. Does Garrus's... you know... does that chafe too?

Unless Turian females have a reinforced... you know... then I'd say no.

[LilyasAvalon]

 Actually, I imagine it would be rather soft, maybe even a little sensitive. But thats just my headcannon of male turian biology. 

Since I imagine their penises would be... Inward when not used.

Modifié par LilyasAvalon, 16 mars 2012 - 03:47 .

[Adventuress]

EvelinShepard wrote...
Just had a disturbing thought. Does Garrus's... you know... does that chafe too?

Erm. . .

I'd have to say here the answer is probably. . .*Scratches head, wonders why she's thinking about this. Looks around awkwardly.* . . .no.

If female Turians give live births (which I think I read somewhere in this thread), then they'd be hard pressed to have the "scales" or "coating" or whatever you'd want to call it on their insides. That in turn wouldn't be very good for their own biology if the males had the "hard coating" on their own reproductive organs. Just like how the inside of their stomachs don't have the "plates/coating/scales." At least. . .that's how it would make sense to me.

[Karrie788]

LilyasAvalon wrote...

 Actually, I imagine it would be rather soft, maybe even a little sensitive. But thats just my headcannon of male turian biology. 

Since I imagine their penises would be... Inward when not used.

Ok, this made me headcanon in details the moment when my Shep tries to figure out Turian biology.

I can't stop laughing.

[General Tiberius]

Karrie788 wrote...

LilyasAvalon wrote...

 Actually, I imagine it would be rather soft, maybe even a little sensitive. But thats just my headcannon of male turian biology. 

Since I imagine their penises would be... Inward when not used.

Ok, this made me headcanon in details the moment when my Shep tries to figure out Turian biology.

I can't stop laughing.

"Errr, Garrus? There's nothing here..."

[EvelinShepard]

... and what I meant as a passing joke has been fully answered, with biological reasoning.

You guys are amazing xD

@Karrie: Garrus can't have been the only one doing research into how their relationship would work.

[Ilysail]

Adventuress wrote...

EvelinShepard wrote...
Just had a disturbing thought. Does Garrus's... you know... does that chafe too?

Erm. . .

I'd have to say here the answer is probably. . .*Scratches head, wonders why she's thinking about this. Looks around awkwardly.* . . .no.

If female Turians give live births (which I think I read somewhere in this thread), then they'd be hard pressed to have the "scales" or "coating" or whatever you'd want to call it on their insides. That in turn wouldn't be very good for their own biology if the males had the "hard coating" on their own reproductive organs. Just like how the inside of their stomachs don't have the "plates/coating/scales." At least. . .that's how it would make sense to me.

I just keep wondering how... protected turian newborns come equipped with. If the plates are to protect from radiation... newborns would certainly need it right? Its possible it starts out somewhat leathery and hardens overtime... but id imagine there would be some hardening... in there

Yay i finished typing that before blushing to death

[Karrie788]

General Tiberius wrote...

Karrie788 wrote...

LilyasAvalon wrote...

 Actually, I imagine it would be rather soft, maybe even a little sensitive. But thats just my headcannon of male turian biology. 

Since I imagine their penises would be... Inward when not used.

Ok, this made me headcanon in details the moment when my Shep tries to figure out Turian biology.

I can't stop laughing.

"Errr, Garrus? There's nothing here..."

:lol:

I LOVE this place.

[Bhictoo]

EvelinShepard wrote...

HelenMac321 wrote...

yukidama wrote...

DineBoo wrote...

I wonder if they sell things in the ME universe for chafing? Premium grade chapstick for kissing?

Where do you think all the omni-gel went? Shepard is hoarding it.

A Turian/Human anti-chaffing sexy time omni-gel? I'd love to see that on the shelves in the Citadel commons. 

Just had a disturbing thought. Does Garrus's... you know... does that chafe too?

Only by the fourth or so, go round...  


I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I really couldn't resist... hehehe

[Adventuress]

I have no idea. My only hypothesis could be something akin to:

Our feet as newborns are soft and then over time (especially people who walk without shoes) they begin to "harden" so to speak and provide for more protection against things such as walking across glass or concrete. Overall though, the skin is still there to protect.

...I don't know...

Edit: "Speculation for everyone!"

Modifié par Adventuress, 16 mars 2012 - 04:08 .

[EvelinShepard]

Adventuress wrote...

I have no idea. My only hypothesis could be something akin to:

Our feet as newborns are soft and then over time (especially people who walk without shoes) they begin to "harden" so to speak and provide for more protection against things such as walking across glass or concrete. Overall though, the skin is still there to protect.

...I don't know...

Edit: "Speculation for everyone!"

Pfff- hahaha That kind of speculation is having me firmly clinging to the indoctrination theory.

And yeah, the idea of the plates being soft when theyre born and then hardening up later on makes sense; kind of like how reptiles have squishy scales when they hatch.

[Baka-no-Neko]

Well, radiation meaning they need protection. I've read many a fic where Shep has to coax out the good stuff fae Garrus...he didn't need much provoking if I remember =D

[Twilight_Princess]

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

[Bluumberry]

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

What? It's a perfectly normal topic of discussion ^^

[LilyasAvalon]

Bluumberry wrote...

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

What? It's a perfectly normal topic of discussion ^^

 We swear it's in the name of science!

[Mresa]

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

You should visit the Clan Vakarian group. They got it all in there.

[Twilight_Princess]

Mresa wrote...

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

You should visit the Clan Vakarian group. They got it all in there.

Oh I've SEEN what they post there *nosebleed*

[carilynn46]

(* This is a small story I wrote, it came to my head and i had to get it down though it is just a rough draft I hope you all like my thoughts of the ending with the destroy/shepard lives ending and yes sweet garrus and shepard in side. Sorry for the bad writing *)

As the beam came after Shepard, Garrus's eyes widen as his mouth gapped open. His heart began to race as every thing seem to be happening in slow motion, even the distance screams became nothing more then back ground sound.

His pace quickened as he reached out for her.

"SHEPARD NO!"

Just then Javik grabbed the turian's arm and pulled him back knowing that they couldn't fullfill their mission if they all were dead.

The back lash of the blast shot them both back, knocking them both unconcious.
Javik was the first to awake, not knowing how much time has passed but he needed to get in contact with the normandy. Slowly he began to stand, pain shooting threw his body as though it was littered with tiny daggers.

"Normandy come in.... we need an extraction"

The line was staticy causing the prothean to shake his head and look at the piles of rubble around him. It reminded him of the final days of his cycle, and he began to wonder if every thing Shepard strived for was for nothing.

Out of the corner of his eyes he saw some movement, quickly, he turned gun raised but seeing how it was Garrus he slowly lowered his weapon and began to walk to his comraid.

"Normandy we need an extraction, come in..."

Offering his hand to the turian Garrus just stared at it, his face was showing signs f given up, disappointment. He turned his head to look where Shepard was standing moments before the beam...

Sighing he looked around the rumble seeing multipal alliance shoilders, as he finally took Javic's hand he realized that Shepards body wasn't among them.

"where's.... shepard?"

He asked as agony played at his voice,

the question made Javic look around, shaking his head he began to wonder if it was possible for Shepard to survive the blast and continue forth.

"I don't know..."

Garrus looked at him and then back towards the beam, he knew that Shepard had a little bit of crazy in her and the image of it made the Turian smile, laugh even, it even gave him hope that maybe just maybe....

"Shore party *static* mandy, whats your position?"

Lifting up his finger Garrus pressed in his ear piece,,

" We're by the conduit, seems calm... for now..."

" ETA five minu...*STATIC* shepard al*static* ight?"

chuckling slightly still with the image fresh in his mind of shepard storming the gates.

" Your guess is as good as mine,"

following the beam up with his eyes he let out a breath.

As Garrus and Javik waiting to be picked up they tended to the wounded, they least they could do was have them pass in comfort or give them some hope that they will see tomarow. It was strange how ever, that harbingar retreated the area taking its puppet with him, but if it thought it killed every one then....

Hearing the faint whistle in the sky, Javik and Garrus both looked up to see the Normandy, shooting what was left over from harbinger's army as it decended. As shore party began to walk over to the ship they began to a funny "wong" sound from the beam behind them.

"Jeff, we must hurry the conduit is over loading and the blast could become... proplomatic"

Joker looked at EDI strangly as she sounded more like Mordin, shaking his head maybe it was best that she spared them the details.

" Hey could you guys pick it up a bit? cause apparently we are now in a red zone of total destruction."

As the ramp lowered, the prothean and turian were ready to board until the area became brighter. Slowly they turned to see the beam palsating. It was hypnotyzing.

Joker tried to tell them to hurry their asses up but they were too distracted to pay attention. Soon the light extended outward like there was a giant explotion with out the noise. Covering their eyes with their forarms, the light began to hard to bare as they closed their eyes out of an instinct, soon the light just diminised.

When their eyes opened the once clear path that laid before them was now full of rubble... form the citedal. Garrus heart sank realizing the worst has happened. Javik guided him up the ramp as he put a comforting hand on his shoulder but Garuus shrugged it off.
___

Shepard laid in the debris unconcious and her breathing was none exsisting... finally air filled her lungs as she finaly woke up gasping for air. She felt weak as her eyes fluddered open to see the moon. Was she dreaming was she even alive?

She tried to move but she couldn't, the rubble was to heavy for her too move but if she was back in London maybe... Trying to get her barrings she quietly called out.

"Garrus..."

her voice was a whisper as she could hear the static coming from her ear piece. Taking in a deep breath she said his name louder.

"GARRUS..."
___

The hatch was about to close but then Garrus stopped in his tracks, the sound was silent but did some one just say his name? Turning around he looked back up to the rubble and again he heard his name.

"Did... did you hear that?"

Javic looked at him as the Turian began to walk forawrd.

"This is not the time Garrus, we must..."

"I am detecting vital sighns within the rubble."

EDI interrupted him, she went to continue to explain as Garrus continued to walk forward with determination.

"Shepard..."

he said quietly

"Where's it coming from EDI?"

As EDI gave him the location Javic just shook his head realizing how stubborn the Turian was. Walking back in the ship, Joker warned Garrus that they were being asked to evacuate but he would stay as long as he could.

Walking up to the pile, the turian began to move the steal and concrete and soon he saw her. Her armor was none exsisting, her skin was covered in blood, seeing her like this broke his heart. Running his finger over her cheek he spoke softly...

"Don't worry shepard I'm going to get you out of here."

There was one last peice that was holding her down but he couldn't move it on his own, when he was about to give up he felt the weight lifting off his shoulders. Looking over he saw Javic standing there.

He was thankfull for the Prothean, his help gave him time to scoop his loved one in his arms. As they began to walk back up to the ship, shepard eyes reopened seeing Garrus. Lifting her hand she placed it on his cheek which startled him as he looked down upon her.

"Never..."

she said softly to him, leaning his head towards her he swallowed hard...

"Never"

With that, a faint smile appeard on Shepard's face before she slipped back to unconsciousness. They boarded the normandy as it began to lift off the ground.
____

"EDI, get us out of here"

"please choice a destination...."

Joker looked over at EDI sitting beside him, he gave her a smile as she smiled back.

"that was a joke"
____

[LilyasAvalon]

EvelinShepard wrote...

Pfff- hahaha That kind of speculation is having me firmly clinging to the indoctrination theory.

And yeah, the idea of the plates being soft when theyre born and then hardening up later on makes sense; kind of like how reptiles have squishy scales when they hatch.

Back when it was still largely theorised that turians laid eggs, I once read a fanfiction explaining how baby turians were covers in a 'fluffy down' to protect themselves. Saw a few pictures too, they were SO CUTE.

[Baka-no-Neko]

Mresa wrote...

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

You should visit the Clan Vakarian group. They got it all in there.

What is this clan you speak of? Baka is BSN noob

[Sable Rhapsody]

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

Mresa wrote...

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

You should visit the Clan Vakarian group. They got it all in there.

Oh I've SEEN what they post there *nosebleed*

I hop on BSN at work and what do I find?  Scandalous pictures and you guys talking about turian bits.  I love all of you so much   But Clan V is definitely NSFW, so that'll have to wait until I get home.

[Mresa]

Baka-no-Neko wrote...

Mresa wrote...

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

*thinks about turian penises*

Only on the bioware forum

You should visit the Clan Vakarian group. They got it all in there.

What is this clan you speak of? Baka is BSN noob

This place 
http://social.bioware.com/group/2135/  

Definitely NSFW. Also gotta be careful at home, don't want my parents suddenly dropping by in my room...
Would be awkward...

EDIT: I gotz top again

Modifié par Mresa, 16 mars 2012 - 04:45 .