105 réponses à ce sujet

[TheElderWand]

Pacifien wrote...

I like my 20 minute version. It goes like this: A couple Jedi are sent to Naboo to negotiate a settlement between the Trade Federation and the planet. The Trade Federation are like "Pfft, let's get this invasion started" and they try to kill the Jedi. But the Jedi make it down to the planet and are like "we need to get to the Queen!"

Skip ahead (Read: skip the Gunguns) and the Queen is being escorted to wherever by these robots when two kickass Jedi jump from above and destroy everything. And then Qui-Gon is like "we need to escape" and the Queen is like "no" and so then Qui-Gon is like "....fine."

Skip ahead (Read: skip all the way to the end. Like, all the way.) Everyone is trying to sneak back into the castle through the back hangar, but suddenly this BAMF is standing in the way. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan are like "we got this," so the Queen's handmaiden is all "we out."

So the Jedi are fighting Darth Maul while the Queen is trying to make it back to the throne room. And her handmaiden makes it and is all "EPIC FAIL" to the Trade Federation. And then the Trade Federation is all "you're not even the Queen!" But then they discover she, like, totally is and we're like "Whaaaa?"

Then Qui-Gon dies and everyone is sad. And Obi-Wan and Yoda are talking about how Darth Maul probably wasn't the real mastermind. And then Yoda tells Obi-Wan he's leveled up and gets his own padawan. Cut to a lingering shot of this young kid at Obi-Wan funeral and the music is all "Dun dun DUUUUUN!"

The End.






That said, I really did like the movie when it first came out and feel it's the strongest of the three prequels. That's right. Strongest. Revenge of the Sith is very likely the worst movie I have ever seen, saved in public opinion because it has shinies and supposed (no, not even) depth.

Why do you think Revenge of the Sith is so bad? I thought all the scenes where Hayden wasn't in them was on par with the original trilogy.

[Il Divo]

TheElderWand wrote...

Why do you think Revenge of the Sith is so bad? I thought all the scenes where Hayden wasn't in them was on par with the original trilogy.

Hell, on its own, I actually liked Revenge better than each of the original fims.

[adneate]

Let's see, The Phantom Menace has a story the makes no sense, characters that don't act like people and an enemy who actually undermines their own plans.

Attack of the Clones has no story and the worst romance ever put into a film in which two people with nothing in common and nothing drawing them together other than the fact that they want to have sex fall in love. It also has dialogue so terrible that it almost seems like it wasn't written by a human being but rather by some space alien or logic based computer system that's only reference for human love was Romeo and Juliet.

Revenge of the Sith proves once and for all that George Lucas is truly the master of the art of ruining things as he destroys pretty much everything about Star Wars once and for all. Turns out Anakin wasn't seduced by the Dark Side he was tricked into being evil and was just a murderous crazy person who had no real friendship with Obi Wan. Yoda is ruined for using a lightsaber and the final fight is such an undramatic waste of time that it's actually funny, actually Darth Vader saying "Padame" and then going "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" was the really funny part. It pretty much proves that George only made these movies to sell toys and make a ****load of money, it's like everything built up to this one moment and it was so stupid and funny that you pretty much know right there you've been had. For 3 movies the guy has basically waved keys in front of your face while taking your wallet out of your back pocket.

[Wentletrap]

Korean sounding aliens ruined it for me right off the bat.

The 4-way finale was a bit much too. Kept cutting away from Darth Maul to the kid in his ship / CGI droid battle.

[Pacifien]

TheElderWand wrote...
Why do you think Revenge of the Sith is so bad? I thought all the scenes where Hayden wasn't in them was on par with the original trilogy.

I'm not entirely sure I can express just how bad Revenge of the Sith really is. I mean, if you found the lightsaber duel between Anakin and Obi-Wan epic as opposed to completely and utterly ridiculous, there is literally nothing that I can say here.

[adneate]

TheElderWand wrote...
Why do you think Revenge of the Sith is so bad? I thought all the scenes where Hayden wasn't in them was on par with the original trilogy.

I'll say why even those scenes suck, it's because there is literally NO film craft in any of those scenes, George Lucas is so utterly inept at shooting dialogue between two people that he essentially does every single scene exactly the same. They all start with someone walking against a fake green screen talking in shot reverse shot or sitting down on a couch talking in shot reverse shot and just when the shot reverse shot gets boring someone will usually walk over to a window turn back and say something. Every single scene with two people is shot like this, flat angles in shot reverse shot. At no point does he try to do anything interesting with the blocking or staging of the shot, it's just two people walking slowly or sitting on a couch talking.

George Lucas is the luckiest guy in show business, he can't direct, write or even edit. He simply lucked out and found directors with talent, writers who could make scenes, actors who could bring them to life and editors who could put it all together with some semblance of quality. If he had the same level of control and input back then that he has now Star Wars would have been stillborn and the most culturally relevant it would have ever got would have been an MST3K episode.

[TheElderWand]

Pacifien wrote...

TheElderWand wrote...
Why do you think Revenge of the Sith is so bad? I thought all the scenes where Hayden wasn't in them was on par with the original trilogy.

I'm not entirely sure I can express just how bad Revenge of the Sith really is. I mean, if you found the lightsaber duel between Anakin and Obi-Wan epic as opposed to completely and utterly ridiculous, there is literally nothing that I can say here.

Didn't you find Order 66 emotional? Didn't you get teared up when Obi-Wan shouted "You were the chosen one?!" If not, then I'm afraid you have no heart, good sir.

[TheElderWand]

And yes, I think the last battle of Revenge of the Sith was very epic, and was great closure to the Star Wars saga.

[TheEndOfAllThings]

I don't care what anyone says, A true Star Wars fan likes all the Star Wars films!

[DRUNK_CANADIAN]

It was ok, a decent/good movie relative to others to be sure, but one of the crappier 3 of the SW series.

The kid pissed me off, Jar jar pissed me off, but otherwise it was good, probably 4th of the 6 for me.


Although the top 3, The Empire Strikes Back, Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope, in that order I think far outclass the other three.

[The Love Runner]

I'm a huge Star Wars fan, but I will say that Phantom Menace was all right. The scenes with Jar Jar are certainly out there; my best friend keeps showing his hate for Jar Jar. What's good for some is that he has less dialogue in Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith.

It was too bad it was Liam Neeson's only appearance in a Star Wars film; he was supposed to be a Force Ghost in Revenge of the Sith and talk to Obi-Wan, but he had an accident before his scheduled appearance.

I liked the podracing, space, and lightsaber duel scenes, although Darth Maul certainly went out in a way I did not expect when I first saw the movie.

(Side Note: I know that Darth Vader's "NOOOOOO!!!" in Revenge of the Sith turned some people off, but I was ok with this, although I will say that I make fun of it like Christian Bale's Batman Voice. The romance scenes in that film as well...I could understand why some were iffy about it. But, personally, I found the rest of the film to be true to the saga even with the flaws. George Lucas isn't talentless in my opinion, the critics would have said so otherwise. It isn't for everyone, but it did have an impact.)

[Sylvianus]

horacethegrey wrote...

Nein. Though, in it's defense, it's not as bad as Attack of the Clones, which I thought was a travesty.

The same.

That said, too childish, and not really interesting. But the first time I saw it, I didn't feel I wasted my time.

[Zanallen]

It was alright. I enjoyed parts of it. But there are much better ways for Lucas to have handled the prequel trilogy.

[Zanallen]

Galactic Runner wrote...

I'm a huge Star Wars fan, but I will say that Phantom Menace was all right. The scenes with Jar Jar are certainly out there; my best friend keeps showing his hate for Jar Jar. What's good for some is that he has less dialogue in Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith.

It was too bad it was Liam Neeson's only appearance in a Star Wars film; he was supposed to be a Force Ghost in Revenge of the Sith and talk to Obi-Wan, but he had an accident before his scheduled appearance.

I liked the podracing, space, and lightsaber duel scenes, although Darth Maul certainly went out in a way I did not expect when I first saw the movie.

(Side Note: I know that Darth Vader's "NOOOOOO!!!" in Revenge of the Sith turned some people off, but I was ok with this, although I will say that I make fun of it like Christian Bale's Batman Voice. The romance scenes in that film as well...I could understand why some were iffy about it. But, personally, I found the rest of the film to be true to the saga even with the flaws. George Lucas isn't talentless in my opinion, the critics would have said so otherwise. It isn't for everyone, but it did have an impact.)

Lucas isn't talentless, no. His problem is that creating Star Wars has gone to his head and there is no one willing to rein in his wackier suggestions.

[adneate]

TheElderWand wrote...
Didn't you find Order 66 emotional? Didn't you get teared up when Obi-Wan shouted "You were the chosen one?!" If not, then I'm afraid you have no heart, good sir.

How is it emotional, the clones (who are disposable people) kill the Jedi (only the ones we don't know) and that's it. There's no reason to be invested in any of it. The whole Anakin being Space Jesus doesn't make any goddamn sense, who wrote this prophecy? Why doesn't it make any sense? All it takes to be a Sith is to have some midichlorins and the desire for power, really does the prophecy of Anakin "Destroying the Sith" make any sense at all? Why did they write a prophecy about Anakin (Who destroys the Jedi) and not his Son who defeats the Empire, re-founds the Jedi and resurrects the Republic as well as turning his fallen father back to the Light?

Plus Anakin and Obi-Wan never seem to be actual friends, Anakin spends most of his time complaining about Obi-Wan behind his back and Obi-Wan still seems just as irritated with this whiny little brat. They talk about things they did together but they never act like friends, it seems more like they barely even like each other. All I thought when Obi-Wan started shrieking at Anakin was "George must not have been on set that day because these actors are trying to act," if George was around he would have put a stop to that nonsense.

The Senate scenes in Phantom were the pinnacle of George Lucas style dialogue: Utterly devoid of passion and delivered with robot like sleep inducing imhumanity. Something that slowly saps your will to live and makes you silently pray for your own death.

[Pacifien]

TheElderWand wrote...
Didn't you find Order 66 emotional? Didn't you get teared up when Obi-Wan shouted "You were the chosen one?!" If not, then I'm afraid you have no heart, good sir.

"You were the Chosen One! Now look at you! No arms.... No legs.... You're on fire! Sucks to be you."

I might have felt Obi-Wan's statement was heartfelt if at any point during the prequels it looked like Obi-Wan viewed Anakin as anything more than the problematic pupil that he felt obligated to train because it was his dying master's final wish.

I might have felt Order 66 had some sort of impact if I had a soul there was any Jedi that I felt a personal connection with bite it in the end.

Most of all, I might have liked Revenge of the Sith if at any point I ever liked Anakin and thought he was worth saving.

[Mr.House]

Even Liam Neeson could not save this garbage of a film.

[Mr.House]

Pacifien wrote...

TheElderWand wrote...
Didn't you find Order 66 emotional? Didn't you get teared up when Obi-Wan shouted "You were the chosen one?!" If not, then I'm afraid you have no heart, good sir.

"You were the Chosen One! Now look at you! No arms.... No legs.... You're on fire! Sucks to be you."

I might have felt Obi-Wan's statement was heartfelt if at any point during the prequels it looked like Obi-Wan viewed Anakin as anything more than the problematic pupil that he felt obligated to train because it was his dying master's final wish.

I might have felt Order 66 had some sort of impact if I had a soul there was any Jedi that I felt a personal connection with bite it in the end.

Most of all, I might have liked Revenge of the Sith if at any point I ever liked Anakin and thought he was worth saving.

Well written Paci.

[PMIGDA2S]

Mr.House wrote...

Pacifien wrote...

TheElderWand wrote...
Didn't you find Order 66 emotional? Didn't you get teared up when Obi-Wan shouted "You were the chosen one?!" If not, then I'm afraid you have no heart, good sir.

"You were the Chosen One! Now look at you! No arms.... No legs.... You're on fire! Sucks to be you."

I might have felt Obi-Wan's statement was heartfelt if at any point during the prequels it looked like Obi-Wan viewed Anakin as anything more than the problematic pupil that he felt obligated to train because it was his dying master's final wish.

I might have felt Order 66 had some sort of impact if I had a soul there was any Jedi that I felt a personal connection with bite it in the end.

Most of all, I might have liked Revenge of the Sith if at any point I ever liked Anakin and thought he was worth saving.

Well written Paci.

Sorry, Mr House, I can't seem to see you because you're so far up that guy's arse.

Anyways, Phantom Menace was alright. It was not as bad as Dragon Age 2, at any rate.

[Mr.House]

PMIGDA2S wrote...

Mr.House wrote...

Pacifien wrote...

TheElderWand wrote...
Didn't you find Order 66 emotional? Didn't you get teared up when Obi-Wan shouted "You were the chosen one?!" If not, then I'm afraid you have no heart, good sir.

"You were the Chosen One! Now look at you! No arms.... No legs.... You're on fire! Sucks to be you."

I might have felt Obi-Wan's statement was heartfelt if at any point during the prequels it looked like Obi-Wan viewed Anakin as anything more than the problematic pupil that he felt obligated to train because it was his dying master's final wish.

I might have felt Order 66 had some sort of impact if I had a soul there was any Jedi that I felt a personal connection with bite it in the end.

Most of all, I might have liked Revenge of the Sith if at any point I ever liked Anakin and thought he was worth saving.

Well written Paci.

Sorry, Mr House, I can't seem to see you because you're so far up that guy's arse.

Anyways, Phantom Menace was alright. It was not as bad as Dragon Age 2, at any rate.

Reported.

[TheElderWand]

Battle of the Heroes is the best piece of music ever created, son!

[upsettingshorts]

You guys need to Google RedLetterMedia. Watch his reviews of the prequels.

Then come back and renounce your previous acceptance of them.

[hoorayforicecream]

Upsettingshorts wrote...

You guys need to Google RedLetterMedia. Watch his reviews of the prequels.

Then come back and renounce your previous acceptance of them.

Linked for the lazy. Be forewarned though, the reviews are almost as long as the movies themselves.