i've been talking to this girl for a year now and she is complicated. I really like her and we built a trust between us. She confided in me, trusted me with private matters and spent evenings skyping with each other.
And here is where it gets complicated......
I'll never forget November 1st. The day I told the girl of my dreams how I felt. She called me modest compared to other guys (in a good way. she was not a open person) and said when the time comes for her to move back to where i lived, she'd consider it. (i met her at school before she moved away for a year) We suddenly stopped talking and when we do talk it is very short. one lined messages, and just no interest in the conversation. i asked her is she was ignoring me and she denied it.
But this is what I dont get. This girl was always talking about guys being douchebags to her, yet guys that were nice to her, she treated like dirt?
i wish for the day, when man will understand women lol
I really can not understand girls
Débuté par
Peanut Butter Jelly Time
, févr. 03 2012 04:39
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#2
Guest_Angus Cousland_*
Posté 03 février 2012 - 04:49
Guest_Angus Cousland_*
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I don't think this is the appropriate place for a discussion of this nature.
However, I will say that you'd be wise to just let her go. Based on what you've written, it seems very unlikely that she'll ever return the interest, so continuing to pursue her is futile.
However, I will say that you'd be wise to just let her go. Based on what you've written, it seems very unlikely that she'll ever return the interest, so continuing to pursue her is futile.
#3
Posté 03 février 2012 - 05:06
frustratemyself
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Boys are not supposed to understand.
#4
Guest_Celrath_*
Posté 03 février 2012 - 05:16
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Modifié par Celrath, 03 février 2012 - 05:21 .
#5
Guest_Celrath_*
Posté 03 février 2012 - 05:21
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You're her emotional backup, . Chances are she started dating someone so she has put distance between you two. If she breakups with that person chances are she will start talking to you like she did before. I suggest you just move on and find someone local to share you life with. If you keep up the fantasy of being with your high school crush. It will only lead to more regret and even depression for you if you put you heart in to something like this where she isn't there for you
#6
Posté 03 février 2012 - 05:28
slimgrin
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You're not going to find answers about dating on a nerd forum.
#7
Posté 03 février 2012 - 05:35
William Shakespeare
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hahahaha, you should read my poem i just posted
#8
Posté 03 février 2012 - 05:53
Tazzmission
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eh dont feel bad op im 27 and currently in a rut myself except the woman i like is married...
long story short she likes me also blah blah but in the end regarding not understaning women. its one of those things that may never get solved
long story short she likes me also blah blah but in the end regarding not understaning women. its one of those things that may never get solved
#9
Posté 03 février 2012 - 06:05
chunkyman
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Tazzmission wrote...
eh dont feel bad op im 27 and currently in a rut myself except the woman i like is married...
long story short she likes me also blah blah but in the end regarding not understaning women. its one of those things that may never get solved
Don't think of it like that.
When a woman is single, you have to compete with the other 3 billion guys on the planet. When she's married, you only have to compete with one.
Go get her, Tiger!
Modifié par chunkyman, 03 février 2012 - 06:11 .
#10
Posté 03 février 2012 - 06:08
Tazzmission
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chunkyman wrote...
Tazzmission wrote...
eh dont feel bad op im 27 and currently in a rut myself except the woman i like is married...
long story short she likes me also blah blah but in the end regarding not understaning women. its one of those things that may never get solved
Don't think of that like that.
When a woman is single, you have to compete with the other 3 billion guys on the planet. When she's married, you only have to compete with one.
Go get her, Tiger!
oh trust me i will
#11
Posté 03 février 2012 - 06:18
Jestina
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I'm not that hard to understand...okay maybe I am. I like being pampered and don't like guys that are wimpy, push overs. A man has to be able to fix stuff and protect me...otherwise he is just a useless part of my life.
And love is a two way street. If you are both not feeling it, then it's time to move on.
And love is a two way street. If you are both not feeling it, then it's time to move on.
#12
Posté 03 février 2012 - 06:39
weedyfun
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that is why i don't date men. they try too hard to understand.
#13
Posté 03 février 2012 - 07:09
Milana_Saros
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Peanut Butter Jelly Time wrote...
snip
As said before, she most likely just wanted an emotional backup. When a person has been hurt, chances are, they need someone to talk to. And acting all dramatic and mysterious can be addicting.
I believe the key thing here is that you've talked with her a year....a year. And nothing has happened between you two. A year. I can't repeat that enough. Chances are, she freaked out and is avoiding you now. She didn't admit it when you asked about it to her face? Yeah...chances are she just wants to be nice. She is a human after all.
There really isn't much to understand. The whole girls vs. boys thing is pretty much BS...a pundle of excuses. There was a brilliant episode in Sex in the City back during the day where Berger told Miranda that mostly if a guy doesn't want to go to your place after a date then he is just not that into you.
Common sense can be applied to that particular line ofc but in most cases, it's true. No matter the gender.
Tazzmission wrote...
eh dont feel bad op im 27 and currently in a rut myself except the woman i like is married...
long
story short she likes me also blah blah
She likes you but married someone else...kk...move on and forget? Maybe?
Modifié par Milana_Saros, 03 février 2012 - 07:11 .
#14
Posté 03 février 2012 - 07:09
slimgrin
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weedyfun wrote...
that is why i don't date men. they try too hard to understand.
I don't try, could care less actually. It's all about me when I date, and you know what? It works quite well.
( Pssst...there's the secret op.)
#15
Posté 03 février 2012 - 08:06
Mercuron
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"I'll consider it" is a code phrase for "You caught me by surprise, so I'm going to keep you hanging for a few months, then txt you that I've been seeing someone for the last five".
#16
Posté 03 février 2012 - 09:38
AshenSugar
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Jestina wrote...
I'm not that hard to understand...okay maybe I am. I like being pampered and don't like guys that are wimpy, push overs. A man has to be able to fix stuff and protect me...otherwise he is just a useless part of my life.
And love is a two way street. If you are both not feeling it, then it's time to move on.
Hehe, that rules me out then, I suck at fighting, have never hit anyone in anger, and my DIY skills are limited to changing a fuse.....
Modifié par AshenSugar, 03 février 2012 - 09:40 .
#17
Posté 03 février 2012 - 10:31
-Semper-
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slimgrin wrote...
You're not going to find answers about dating on a nerd forum.
...where everybody is supersized and butt ugly. especially the few women of course!
#18
Posté 03 février 2012 - 10:33
Nu-Nu
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As someone who's friends with these type of girls, who watch them change from immature teens to mature adult with mortgages.
You're just the wrong nice guy at the wrong time. Usually, girls like her aren't actually ready for a proper relationship for whatever reason (most common - immaturity which sounds like the case here with the way she's acting or other reasons such as insecure/daddy issues/selfish/fear of marriage & children/etc so many other reason). She needs to get bad boys out of her system, she'll settle down with a nice guy when she's more mature and more sure of what she wants from a relationship, but that could be 10 years from now, and you'll probaly still won't be the nice guy she wants.
She probaly doesn't want to cut you out of her life, she just may be trying to cool off your feelings by not being so readily available. If she makes herself more difficult, you'll give up those feelings.
You're just the wrong nice guy at the wrong time. Usually, girls like her aren't actually ready for a proper relationship for whatever reason (most common - immaturity which sounds like the case here with the way she's acting or other reasons such as insecure/daddy issues/selfish/fear of marriage & children/etc so many other reason). She needs to get bad boys out of her system, she'll settle down with a nice guy when she's more mature and more sure of what she wants from a relationship, but that could be 10 years from now, and you'll probaly still won't be the nice guy she wants.
She probaly doesn't want to cut you out of her life, she just may be trying to cool off your feelings by not being so readily available. If she makes herself more difficult, you'll give up those feelings.
#19
Posté 03 février 2012 - 10:38
Critical Miss
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She sounds like baggage. Probably hurt by someone and drags it around with her. Avoid like the plague.
Modifié par Critical Miss, 03 février 2012 - 10:39 .
#20
Posté 03 février 2012 - 11:18
Vez04
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This thread reminded me why i never go into chats with women.
#21
Posté 03 février 2012 - 12:20
jerst
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There's nothing to understand about women. There's a lot to figure out about people in general and about yourself, but that's about it.
#22
Posté 03 février 2012 - 12:21
Dominus
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Not every woman is exactly the same as the next, and that applies to men as well. Gender alone doesn't completely mold and determine one's personality. There's no doubt it has an effect, but what kind of effect and to what magnitude it has on them depends on the individual. I'm a guy. Does that mean I enjoy football & movies about war?i wish for the day, when man will understand women lol
It doesn't sound like she's treating you terribly - sounds more like she's getting cold feet. But from the way you write it, it sounds like both sides are lacking interest. "We suddenly stopped talking and when we do talk it is very short. one lined messages, and just no interest in the conversation." That implies both sides stopped, and yet you're asking if she's ignoring you. Could she have asked the same thing?This girl was always talking about guys being douchebags to her, yet guys that were nice to her, she treated like dirt?
In my personal opinion, you may want to give her some space. If she's still interested in you, she will make an attempt to speak to you eventually. If you end up trying to bug her about that sort of thing persistently, it will come off as clingy; clingy can be bad. I can say from personal experience that a relationship with lop-sided interest in each other can have major issues.
Give her some air to breathe. If she doesn't come back, perhaps it wasn't meant to be.
-DV
#23
Posté 03 février 2012 - 12:27
turian councilor Knockout
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Easy dude it gets better with the age, just go where the wind take you and btw not all women are that hard to understand:)
Modifié par turian councilor Knockout, 03 février 2012 - 12:27 .
#24
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Posté 03 février 2012 - 12:31
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I feel for you, Op.
As DV said, perhaps she isn't very sure of your feelings? If you've not explained how you feel then maybe you should think about that. If you have and she's still acting uninterested, cold and distant, then she most likely doesn't feel the same way about you.
Leave her to it. If she's not interested, no amount of effort on your part will make a difference. And do you really want to be wasting your time and energy on someone who has very little regard for your feelings? She's probably not a bad person and she may not even be trying to hurt you, but there comes a time when you have to let go. The time may be now.
As DV said, perhaps she isn't very sure of your feelings? If you've not explained how you feel then maybe you should think about that. If you have and she's still acting uninterested, cold and distant, then she most likely doesn't feel the same way about you.
Leave her to it. If she's not interested, no amount of effort on your part will make a difference. And do you really want to be wasting your time and energy on someone who has very little regard for your feelings? She's probably not a bad person and she may not even be trying to hurt you, but there comes a time when you have to let go. The time may be now.
