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post your own Joke DLC for Mass Effect 3


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#76
Nexis7

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Random Jerkface wrote...

Party Temple.

It's a club.


Violent balls, we promise not to be workplan.

#77
McAllyster

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Biotic ball. It should be like Huttball in SWTOR.

#78
Finis Valorum

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I'd like Krogan fishing and Island vacation please.
Ilium Noir also sounds nice for a post ending DLC,

Some of these ideas are at least much better than the generic weapon and armour packs Bioware and EA seems so fond of.

#79
Chuvvy

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Decisions Matter. For the low price of $15.00, you can make your decisions actually matter.

#80
Lucas-Shepard

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Party like a Turian - 1200 Bioware points


Outfits the normandy with a bigger, better and upgradeable bar for those days where you just don't feel like saving the galaxy.

Hang out with your crewmates and have fun with a new drinking game. Kinect functionality included for the xbox 360,

Complete with Volus bartender, Pole and Hanar stripper.

Optional DLC: Shot glasses in a variety of colors. Blue, black, red, green, yellow, orange, pink and purple.

80 Bioware points pr. Glass

#81
Les_Carver

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Posted Image 

This DLC will serve as an alternate way to confront Cerberus and it's leader, the mysterious Illusive man in Mass Effect 3.
        Plot details:

A red sand addict named Charlie Harper barely escaped Omega after the reapers attacked and took a shuttle to the Citadel looking for some parties to forget about the mess. One day, he meets Commander Shepard in the Dark Star lounge and after drinking ryncol, inhaling some red sand and having a few hallex pills, Charlie reveals he actually IS the Illusive Man's son but he was thrown away and replaced by Kai Leng after having sex with all his father's mistresses and spending billions of credits in parties, booze and drugs.
Shepard uses Charlie's knowledge on Cerberus and the Illusive man to prepare an assault that will stop Cerberus forever.

          Features:
-Recruit a dangerous biotic squadmate with a unique heavy melee attack (crack a bottle).
-Charlie will be a potential romanceable character (if drunk or high) for both male and female Shepard. Don’t expect more than a one night stand if renegade.
-Increase your chances of winning the war against the reapers if you can convince the Illusive man to accept Charlie back and help you in the battle for Earth.
-Kill the Illusive Man and convince Charlie to take his place.
-Explore Cerberus bases and all their dirty little secrets from the previous games.

Modifié par Les_Carver, 20 février 2012 - 06:10 .


#82
comrade8472

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The Collectors. Dlc.
Strange ships have been spotted coming from the galactic core.

They are pissed. They want revenge, you killed their baby.
A 2 part dlc.
multiplayer fight wave after wave of collectors and husks. gold run only preatorians.
Maps include a collector ship and what appears to be a copy of a certain base. What horrors await?
beat all ten waves to to unlock the bonus wave, It's not called extraction.

Single player: You must find the collectors new base. before the galaxy is overwhelmed by a combined Reaper invasion, Collectors quest for revenge. guest stars Harby.

#83
JerusPI

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The Squeamish Patch 800 points
Also known as the "arms dont work that way" patch
Keep Characters Like Miss Jilani and the Pedigreed Salarian from bending their arms at sickening angles

#84
Farbautisonn

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Caesar:

After saving the citadel and the races of the universe once again, you are "encouraged" by popular demand to do away with the red tape of the citaldel councill and lead the now broken and battered galaxy back to prosperity.

Features:
The chance to enslave the entire batarian race: They didnt see that comming.

Elcor standup marathon nights in the Citadel plaza. You enjoy it so why shouldnt everyone else.

Bopping for krogans. Weekly televised show where dissidents and criminals are froced to bob for apples in different barrels, one of wich contains a krogan who has been starved for weeks.

Running Turian: Weekly televised show of former Turian bureaucrats dumped on a rachni homeworld armed with a spoon and shin protectors. Survivors are given their freedom, a cash reward, and sent off to a paradise world. We promise.

Establishing a massive harem of your choise of males, females or both. Krogans and rachni available for 200 extra bioware points.

Expanding the First galactic Emperium to include all you damn well please.

#85
LiquidLogic2020

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How about weapon dlc that's attached to hentai statues? Oh, wait...

#86
Sashimi_taco

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I would pay serious money for all of these DLCs.

#87
DarkPsylocke26

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Reapers asking Shepard for cookies.

#88
Kiltman

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 I want a Lazarus Project lab on board to bring back all the children Bioware is killing:crying::crying::D

Modifié par zooky67, 21 février 2012 - 01:05 .


#89
Mendelevosa

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 Posted Image

#90
TonyTitan

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Courtship DLC:

After romancing your favorite LI from either ME1 or ME2, now the true test of Shepard's devotion comes into play.

(Male Sheps) Once a month your LI will experience very trying 'mood swings'.....what sort of decision making will you decide upon in order to keep her happy and pleased. How will you adjust to moments of complete bliss, then in a blink of an eye having Armageddon tear through the Normandy.
(FemSheps) How will you continue to keep your LI happy as you battle cramps and mood swings...uncontrolled outbursts, unexplained emotional changes, and those embarrassing moments where you cannot fit into your form fitting armor or casual wear due to some 'bloating'.

As an extra value bonus pack to this DLC, for those who have Miranda for their LI........the "I'm Pregnant" expansion pack. Throughout this mission your one and only goal is to get Miranda pregnant. Can you find some new medical procedure to help her? And if you do, what steps and 'tools' will you employ in order to give her the 'Ultimate Experience'.
Then, if you succeed, how will you endure the next 9 months of your lives together? Will you be there tending to her 'cravings' for pickles and peanut butter at 4am? Will you still think she is that 'hot' woman when she begins showing? How will you respond to her uncertainty and her 'jealousy' issues when she sees and hears you talking with Jack?

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All for 1600 points....coming to a DLC downloader soon!

#91
Bail_Darilar

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Replay the final mission as shifty looking cow from ME1 :)

#92
Farbautisonn

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Once upon a time in Tuchanka: Western style cowboy flick plot with Krogans.

Krant of Brothers: 4 brothers are killed in battle and you have to go fetch the last one out of a warzone deep in Reaper space to fetch the last one to avoid a public relations disaster.

Where Aasari dare: An asari general has been captured by the reapers. Your job is to infiltrate and fetch her before they find out she is in reality not a matriarc but an exotic dancer, and smell a rat concerning the plans for a second front.

The sound of embracing eternity: You are cast as liara who has to use biotics and cunning to make shepard fall in love with you (again) after he married a floozy and she died from a gastric bypass operation gone wrong. Meanwhile batarian slavers threaten to take over the citadel and you end up having to run for your lives.

#93
JerusPI

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The Doctor DLC- Dont shoot anyone talk everyone into submission save the day and travel with an incredibly hot platonic sidekick

#94
SouzaNZ

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Interspecies Reproduction DLC :

Allow Shepard to mate and procreate with any love interest regardless of race, sexuality, gender or fertility concerns.

Exclusive DLC contained via the Space Launch Promotion. Only six in existence!

#95
mogonk

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A Prothean squad member with a mission to Eden Prime.

#96
Amyntas

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Fight as a vorcha against the evil huumaan oppressors.

#97
Tilted_Logic

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 Alternate Appearance Pack:

Posted Image
I'm actually extremely surprised no one posted this already, but I can't think of anything else at the moment; sorry for the unoriginality.

Random Jerkface wrote...

Party Temple.

It's a club.

 

:lol:

Modifié par Tilted_Logic, 23 février 2012 - 01:42 .


#98
Merchant2006

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SOMEONE LOCK THIS THREAD. YOU ARE GIVING EA IDEAS. DAMN YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

#99
UndercoverDoctor

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From Ashes.

#100
kittehg0d

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JAMAICAN PROTHEAN 10$ DAY 1 RELEASE

that would be funny right?....right?