164 réponses à ce sujet

[Fast Jimmy]

Barry... quick word of advice... if you dot want to risk this thread being shut down permanently... let's dial back on the comments to shoot a likeness of a Bioware employee, shall we?

[wsandista]

I just can't stop laguhing everytime I come to this thread.

http://t2.gstatic.co...UQenUzUcn-1te7g

[Barry Bathernak]

Fast Jimmy wrote...

Barry... quick word of advice... if you dot want to risk this thread being shut down permanently... let's dial back on the comments to shoot a likeness of a Bioware employee, shall we?

i relize this is crazy late but all i was doing was telling one fictonal character to shoot an unnamed fictional character since "vic" knows something horrible about the unnamed person and i'm rather inclined to side with the character i know and trust his gut instinct. and if they wanted this thread shut it would have been the second those new rules went up.

[A Crusty Knight Of Colour]

I've had like three quarters of this chapter completed for 3 weeks. I've just either been busy, or too lazy to finish it off. Mainly because the lack of community outrage/adulation coming from the EC makes it difficult to motivate myself.

I can't promise I'll continue this to the end, but I felt it would be too much of a tease to leave it on that last chapter before and I kind of have a few things planned in the next upcoming chapters which would be a waste not to write.

So, enjoy the resurrection!



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Click here for the full Chapter Index!

The Story So Far:

Paragon and his companion Vic the writer are engaged in an epic quest to save the BioWare Social Network. The duo deal with New Interplay mob boss, BioWare hater and friend of Vic, the notorious Big Jesus. After doing a job for the man, Paragon and Vic are given access to a man Vic firmly believes could help them retrieve the Infinity Engine Creation Kit from Vault City. The one thing that could save BioWare and it's Social Network.

Vic and Paragon head to this mystery man's location, where they find the most grotesque of experiments being carried out on helpless civilians. As Vic uncovers disturbing information that causes him to regret his pursuit of this person, the mystery man himself reveals his identity to Paragon...

: I love mystery men.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 14:

: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! YOU'RE DAVID GA-

: Myron. It's Myron. Myron, baby, Myron!

: Is... is it true, "Myron"? You are the cause of BioWare's woes?

: Well, I don't know. Maybe. I created Lyrium. The most addictive of drugs. Using Lyrium, I crafted Dragon Age and my colleagues loved it so much, that before I even finished Dragon Age, they used it as a base for the Mass Effect series. If that drug and formula is what caused BioWare's "woes", then yes. But personally, I think it's brilliant and that certain people just don't get how innovative it truly is.

: Brilliant? Ugh, but why did you do it?

: Duh, because it was fun, because people would then recognise my genius. Because I could, Vic. Because I could. You're no different, you know. Ooh "what can change the nature of a man?" Grr, "Apathy is Death and I hate the force", blah blah blah... you have no right to judge me.

: We're nothing alike. You have - knowingly - unleashed a monstrosity on the world.

: It's a masterpiece, not a monstrosity, Vic. Have you seen what people think of my work and it's derivatives?





: Kindred spirits...

: You make me sick, Myron.

: I know.

: You are my hero, Mr. Myron!

: I know.

: Gugh... putting all that aside, we, uhh, we need you to help us save BioWare. The stuff you've done has sparked massive conflict all around. Paragon here needs to find the Infinity Engine Creation Kit and I was hoping you could help us undo the damage you've done.

: Hold on Vic, that can wait. Mr Myron, can I ask you a few questions about your writing process? I know you're super talented and super busy, but I'd love to know how some things about the super original and deep Dragon Age franchise.

: ... Sure, kiddo. What would you like to know?

: Well, how do you make your writings so good and amazing?

: It's simple really. You just inject it with lots of Lyrium. It's a writing formula that's like a drug for gamers: it maximises emotional engagement. That's the key to good writing.

: I know Lyrium's a good drug, but that's not good writing. What about thematics, narrative coherency, believable character motivations, story/gameplay integratio-

: Wrong. If you want a story so powerful that the average gamer keels over drooling as the desire for additional Day 1 DLC burns ever stronger, all you need is to cultivate emotional engagements through Lyrium.

: How do you cultivate Lyrium and emotional engagements?



: Speaking of plenty of ****... Go on.

: See, we start experimenting with the brahm- uhh, romances and melodrama as a fertilizer for the stories. Then get this, we noticed that the testers working QA were getting high from the cinematic dialogs.

: So the cinematic dialogs were enough to produce the effect?

: By putting tons of romance and melodrama in the story, we found out that the cinematic dialogs give more than enough of a kick. Gigglesquee. Literally. 'Course, we had to test it to get the mix right...

: How much testing exactly?



: Are you insane? You killed a hundred human beings just for playtesting?!

: Quel horreur! You getting bent at me over a bunch of QA testers? Hey, we had to make sure the games wouldn't kill our customers.

: Oh, well, THAT makes it alright then. Congratulations, Myron. You have hit the lowest common denominator possible for a human being. I've heard enough, I'm out of here.

Vic furiously attempts to storm out of Myron's lab. The writer was clearly disturbed by the depths of Myron's apparent depravity. Paragon however, is able to grab Vic before he leaves.

: Come on Vic, you might be angry with Mr Myron. If he's causing BioWare problems, then that causes me problems, too. But he could help us solve all those issues and we can learn so much from him!

: Do whatever the hell you want with that thing, Paragon. But the only way he's going to be of use to us is if he cures Lyrium addiction.

: Wa-wait, what?!

: It has to be done. Surely you can see the effects Lyrium is having. Or have you not seen how the Mass Effect 3 endings affected the community?

: B-but that's just the 4chan homophobes and entitled whiners who don't know about artis-

: The people most devastated were the Lyrium-addled, hopelessly addicted fans, not exaggerated scapegoats. Even now, they cling to false hope, both cursing and adoring BioWare, as what remains of their sanity rots away. Their ramblings are poison to all those who hear them, Paragon! And none of this would've happened, were it not for Lyrium. It. Must. End.

And so, Vic posed to Paragon the questions he had to ask.

: Are you willing to cure addiction to Lyrium? Are you willing to do away with Lyrium based games? Are you willing to save BioWare and it's Social Network?

: Uh, I-um, ahh...

: Tch. I'll be upstairs.

Vic quickly climbs the ladder out of Myron's lab.

The more Paragon thought about it though, the more he had to admit that Vic was right.

Our hero knew what he had to do.

...

: Mr. Myron, Mr. Myron!! Can I please have your autograph?! Please Please Please!!

: No, I'm far too busy and far too important for that. But I'll give you something even better.



: Boy oh boy! Wow Wee, Wow Wee!! It'll go great with my PS3!!



: It's just so cool that BioWare always knows what us fans really want.

: Yes, it is cool that we know what the fans want. This is a limited edition console that was a prize for a sweepstakes competition on G4TV, so be grateful.

: Yeah, of cour... wait, how come you still have it, then?

: Oh, there was a technical issue with all of the entries, so we couldn't decide on a winner.

: All of the entries? How many entries were there?

: Oh uhh... well technically, we didn't get- wait, that's not important. What is important is that you now own it.

: Oh thank you so much, Mr. Myron, you're amazing!

: I'm reminded of that fact on a daily basis, Paragon. So, what, can I go free now? Has Big Jesus allowed me to leave?

: Well yes, he said that you could come with us. Vic and I are on a mission to save BioWare. I'm still looking for the Infinity Engine Creation Kit, but if the Lyrium in your games is causing addictions and problems then... th-then... I'd ask you t-to cure it...

: How quaint. A cure. Sure. You go cold turkey. Stop buying BioWare games. Course, I made that a reeeal difficult option with Lyrium.

: Come on, Mr. Myron. You're a literary genius! You can make brilliant works without Lyrium, so what would it take to cure Lyrium addiction?



: It's basically a highly addictive narrative infused with over the top romance, right? Couldn't you use well rounded romance options with realistic motivations to break the addiction?

: Nice try. No dice. Lyrium ain't blocked that easily. Once Anders blows up the Chantry, or Shepard looks in that vent, the addiction ain't gonna go away.

: What about some kind of melodrama blocker? That would repress the chemical and psychological addiction, wouldn't it?



: Well?

: Well... maybe it would work, but I'm pretty sure Lyrium would chew right through that ****. Now wh-wh-why the hell are we even talking about this?! Wh-where would you get your hands on melodrama blockers, anyway?

: You tell me, Mr. Myron. You're the literary visionary.

: Maybe Vault City. It's the least melodramatic place I know of. A lot of old pre-BioWare bases also used to stock them to prevent obsessive character addiction.

: Vault City? What a coincidence! The Infinity Engine Creation Kit is supposed to be there. We can pickup both the melodrama blockers and the Infinity Engine Creation Kit at the same time!



: What about the pre-BioWare bases? Where are those located?

: Do I look like a cartographer to you? You want to scour the Wasteland looking for them? Then you go right ahead.

: Well... it looks like we'll be going to Vault City then. I'll go upstairs and talk to Vic. You should prepare your things, when you're ready come up and we'll head out. Yeah... we'll, umm, we'll head out...

...

Paragon leaves Myron's lab and climbs up the ladder to meet up with Vic.

The writer had calmed down, and our hero notices that he is immersed in a graphic novel, unaware that Paragon was even there.

Paragon edges closer, catching a glimpse of what Vic was reading.



: Oh hey, is that a Mass Effect comic?

Vic turns around, surprised to see our hero. He quickly rolls up the graphic novel and puts it away.

: Mass Effect?

: Yeah, that was totally The Illusive Man right? He had a suit on and was smoking. What else could it have been?

: No, it's the New Ve... ugh, nevermind. So, what's the deal with Myron? Is he coming with us? Did you kill him? Did you get his autograph? I could tell you wanted one.

: ...No I didn't get an autograph, but he gave me something even better. Anyways, he's agreed to come with us. And...

: And?

: You... you were right. If Myron's Lyrium is causing so much pain, then it had to be stopped. I-I asked him to find a cure to... to remove lyrium from BioWare games... forever...

: Really? That's great news! Well done, Paragon! I'm so proud of you. I didn't think you could pull it off!

: We'll umm... we'll go to Vault City, both the Infinity Engine Creation Kit and the c-cure for Lyrium should be th-there.

: Sweet!

: Y-yeah... "sweet"...

Vic, sensing Paragon's anguish, moves over to our startled hero. The writer embraces him and offers him a few words of comfort. Paragon embraces Vic tightly, no longer capable of containing his soul-crushing grief.



: Oh wow, that's hot. Mind if I take notes for my next book?

The duo quickly compose themselves, clearly embarrassed about having been seen by Myron.

: I'm sorry you saw that. I-it's just th-that... the Lyrium... it.... n-nevermind. Let's get going.

While Paragon attempts to drop the issue and head out, Vic on the other hand, fires off a cheapshot at Myron in retaliation.

: What's that thing on your head? A dead cat?

: Uhh... it's hair?

: ...........

: ..........

: ...........

: What? I need a disguise, what if I get swamped by Adoring Fans? You know, those things you don't have.

As Vic and Myron exchange comments back and forth with each other, Paragon closes his eyes and takes a long, deep breath. The prospect of a world without Lyrium based BioWare games was scary. But ultimately, he also knew that a world without BioWare at all was downright terrifying. Hell on Earth.

There was nothing else to do but accept that Lyrium had to go and that the Infinity Engine Creation Kit had to be acquired.

Finding resolve in his task once more, our hero turns back to his two bickering comrades.

: He's right Vic, so drop it. You too, Mr. Myron. Now come on. We've got work to do.

-----------------(End of Chapter 14.)

[congealeddgtllvr]

CrustyBot wrote...
What about thematics, narrative coherency, believable character motivations, story/gameplay integratio-

Whaaaaat?!  Vic, you are so misguided. . .   

[A Crusty Knight Of Colour]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Click here for the full Chapter Index!

The Story So Far:

Paragon and his companion Vic the writer are engaged in an epic quest to save the BioWare Social Network. The duo find the man responsible for the vile addictive Lyrium, a major cause for BioWare's ills. Things go sour when the drug's creator, Myron, displays a cavalier attitude to the results of his work, sending Vic off into a rage. After a confrontation with an angry Vic, Paragon deals with the realisation that to save BioWare and it's Social Network, he would have to cure Lyrium and as such, potentially destroy what he loved so much about BioWare's games.

Convincing Myron to cure Lyrium, the dynamic duo soon becomes the terrific trio. Although Vic and Myron appear to get along poorly, Paragon is able to halt their bickering as they begin their journey to the mysterious Vault City. The location of both Lyrium's cure and the Infinity Engine Creation Kit from Vault City. The two things that could save BioWare and it's Social Network.

: I'm. Too sexy for my hair. Too sexy for my hair. So sexy, don't stare.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 15:

Despite a long and tiring trip, the trek to Vault City was relatively uneventful. Both Vic and Myron had been to Vault City in the past and both of them knew what paths the trio had to take.

Myron and Vic still fired verbal shots at one another, but for the most part, Paragon was able to keep their tempers under control. The only times it had threatened to get out of hand was while our hero became too involved in character romance fan threads on the BSN to notice.

: There is always only one path to take, idiot.

: Full of crap. There are many choices and paths to take, all of which are unique and paint the entire experience in a different light. They might not always change the world, but they are there. We have choices and there are consequences to those choices.

: You're the one full of crap. If the destination is the same, then obviously there's only one way to get there. Alternate paths don't matter, they're pointless.

: You're pointless.

: Yeah? Well... shut up!

: Oh Garrus, you're just so cool and handsome. I want to totally nom your face.



: .........

: Sorry, I was thinking aloud. Now, where are we exactly...



: We are actually pretty close to Vault City now, aren't we?

...

As they approach closer Vault City, Paragon notices that both Vic and Myron are somewhat hesitant to push forward. To our hero, it seemed that both of them were dragging their feet, looking for any excuse to pause. Neither were in a hurry to reach their destination.

But, try as they might, the two writers were unsuccessful in stalling Paragon for more than a few hours.

They manage to arrive at the outskirts of Vault City in the middle of the evening. With Myron and Vic sensing that Paragon's temper was about to reach breaking point, all three of them were eager to get some respite and rest.



The guard takes one look at Paragon, then quickly motions for the gate to open for the trio.

Paragon, Myron and Vic all look around for a place to spend the night. Vic spots a clinic with beds and a healing machine from afar. All three rush inside.



: Actually, all of us here could use some medical attention. You wouldn't happen to have those beds free for the night as well, would you?

: This place doesn't look like it has the best equipment and supplies. You sure you can patch us up, Doc?

: Haha, I have no idea!

: Whatever. We'll pay you a fair price, just let us sleep here tonight and fix us up tomorrow morning.

The doctor nods in acceptance, he apparently is satisfied with Myron's terms.

Without another word, our trio plunk themselves down into the three available beds to the doctor's surprise. They quickly drift off into a deep sleep. While Myron and Vic slept quietly, Paragon on the other hand, did not.

Our hero scrunches his face in discomfort, he tosses and turns while presumably experiencing a terrible nightmare.

Images flash in and out of Paragon's defenceless mind, each image more terrifying than the last.



: Eggh...



: Mmmrrgghh...



: Nnnnggghhhrrr.....HAH?!

Our hero jolts up, wide awake. It's morning. Vic and Myron rise from their slumber not soon after, Vic the first one to notice Paragon's uneasiness.

: Hey Paragon, you okay? You don't look so good.

: I'm.... fine? I don't know, Vic. I had a crazy dream...

: Dream?

: Yeah, it was just a sequence of pictures and some guy was babbling over and over. It was kinda scary, like as if the pictures and the voice over could make me lose my sanity. I don't know why, because now that I think about it, nothing the voice said made any sense...

: Oh, I get those sometimes. Did you also get the young boy who bursts into flames? It just fills me with shock and horror whenever I see it. To know that there's nothing to stop it.

: Small boy?... No... I didn't get that...

: Oh. Umm, nevermind then.

: Hmm... what could it all mean?

: Don't worry about it Paragon, you've just been under a lot of stress lately. Where's the Doctor? He ought to patch you up.

Paragon nods and the three of them head to the back office to wake up the good Doctor.

They don't emerge for almost an hour, finding out first-hand that "healing" was an extremely painful and lengthy process.



: Much appreciated. We "may" be back.

The trio leave the Doctor feeling a bit sore, but ultimately, better for the treatment.

...



: So... this is it... Vault City... I wonder what it's like.

Not everyone was able to keep their cool like Paragon. Unlike our hero's calm demeanour, Myron appeared restless. He kept looking around and wouldn't stop adjusting his hair.

: ****... the guards... does my disguise look obvious?

It took a stern look from Vic to finally calm the visionary down.

The trio reach another gate, with supposedly the "real" Vault City inside. As they attempt to enter, one of the guards standing on duty stops them in their tracks.



: Proper authorisation?



: Where can I find Wallace?



: Thanks for your time. Goodbye.

The gate guard raises his arm and points out where the Customs building was located for our beloved trio. As they move away from the Gate, Vic couldn't help but express his discomfort at the situation.

: A "Day Pass", just to get in? That seems a bit over the top, no?

: Vault City is one of those places, Vic. Where anything and everything has to adhere to their law and where you can be "locked down" in an instant. It's kinda cool, except they kicked me out. If they recognise me in this disguise, we're screwed you know.

: Let's just get that Day Pass from Wallace. We need to get the Infinity Engine Creation Kit and cure Lyrium without any more distractions.

...

Paragon leads Myron and Vic into the Vault City Customs Office. It isn't long until they spot Wallace.

: Greetings, friends! I'm Wallace! How many I help you?

: Hello, Wallace! We'd like to enter the city.



: It's very important you let us in and speak to your leader.

: Those who need to deal directly with the merchants or the First Citizen are given a Day Pass. Only people with a Day Pass are allowed to enter the city.

: Who's the First Citizen?

: Our First Citizen is one J. Lynette. She has done many good things for our city in her 10 years of service.

: Such as?

: She has kept our city untainted by the outside world.

: Good for you, kiddo.

: Look, we need to speak with the First Citizen. It's urgent!



: That's why it's vital that we speak to her. I'll be sure to throw in a good word about how efficiently the Customs Office is being run. But if you can't help us, then...

: I didn't say I couldn't help, it's just that... well... what is the purpose of your visit?

: I can't tell it to you personally, Officer, as much as I'd like to. It's for the First Citizen's ears alone. That's why it's vital I speak to her.



: I wouldn't trouble you if it wasn't a matter of extreme urgency, Officer. I'll be sure to mention how helpful you were when we speak to the First Citizen.

: Well... this certainly seems to be a matter for the First Citizen. Here is your Day Pass. It is only good during the day.

: Nooo... really?

: At night, you will be asked to leave the city. Citizens also reserve the right to cancel the Day Pass privileges at any time, so behave yourself.

: We won't have any problems, we are on a righteous task, our cause is just.

Wallace hands three sets of Day Passes to Paragon: one each for Paragon and his two companions. After thanking Wallace for his help, they leave the Customs Office in good spirits. Paragon in particular, seemed pleased with how the day's events were panning out.

: Finally, things are looking up and we're getting the respect we deserve. With some luck, we'll be able to save BioWare in no time!

The trio approach the Vault City gate once more.



: Here you go.

The gate guard takes a close look at the Day Passes Paragon produces, satisfied with what he sees, he then nods to the other guard.



Like magic, the large gate instantly lowers and Paragon leads our trio into Vault City proper. He doesn't get far past the gate however. He looks around and our hero's jaw drops in amazement. It was nothing like the other towns he had traveled to. It was so clean, so grand, so...

: Majestic...

: It's beautiful isn't it?

Paragon turns around to face Myron and Vic, who now enter Vault City proper. His face still showing amazement in the grandeur of Vault City.

: Yeah, it is quite impressive.



: It's kinda empty though...

-------------|(End of Chapter 15.)

Modifié par CrustyBot, 16 août 2012 - 12:33 .

[Chromie]

Wow as someone who played TOR the last image made me genuinely lol.

[Fast Jimmy]

A nice job, as always, Crusty.

Forgive my ignorance, but who is the picture of "Wallace"?

[wsandista]

This makes me want to play Fallout 2 again.

The TOR image at the end was quite a nice finish.

[ObserverStatus]

Whoa, is that the head of Gunther Hermann from Deus Ex in the circle to the top left?

Modifié par bobobo878, 01 septembre 2012 - 05:35 .

[Kaiser Arian XVII]

Someday I will look at this top with a fast and unrestricted I.Connection. I promise!

[TheBlackBaron]

I died at the Myron talking head with Gaider's face shooped onto it.

[Eternal Phoenix]

XD

[A Crusty Knight Of Colour]

Can't believe most of the images are still here. That's good.

So yeah. Resurrection bump. Because I might just plan on starting this up again. I believe I owe Fast Jimmy a chapter or two.

=>

[Fast Jimmy]

Well, technically I ask for a new Jagged Alliance 2 LP upd...

...errrr... I mean, awesome! I thought this was two feet in the grave with three tons of concrete over it. Keep it rolling!

Modifié par Fast Jimmy, 04 juillet 2013 - 03:51 .