Next, Garrus finally finishes his calibrations, and creates the ultimate gun, codenamed "LAAAAAZZZZOOOR"
He fires it, obliterating every reaper in sight, but also destorys the outer shell of the moon, which causes Earth's oceans to go into major flux. Turns out Atlantis is revealed and confirmed to be real, and ZOMG GASP, a reaper city! So the new new old Reaper threat attacks, killing Garrus by feeding him non dextro foods.
Joker, seeing this new development, ****** out and gets everyone on the Normandy to take a trip to SoCal to go Surfing. Unfortunatly EDI dumps him for Legion, but Legion rejects her because he's dating Blasto.
EDI then gets angered, and becomes one of the new one million reapers, who ressurect Garrus as the head of the Reaper Dance Team.
The RDT, is elected for attending the Galactic Dance Showdown, but meet their rivals, the all Jamaican Prothean Cheer**** dancers. Elated to finally prove himself, Garrus, Tali, FemShep, (The twin sister of the Jedi Sheploo) and all the Reapers dance their hearts out, and win the championship. As they drink their fruit juices and accept their accolades, Sovereign the reaper who had just left the Reaper Hospital, reconnects with harbinger, his long lost girlfriend, Together the same night, while drunk, they make sweet love, and rediscover that Sheploo and FemShep are the children they lost when Asari stripper commandos attacked the maturnity ward where the babies had been held hostage by Saren's mother, Lightning Farron.
Later, Sheploo and Caius Discover they have feelings for eachother, and give eachother promise rings as Caius leaves to serve a two year Mormon Mission. Sheploo, naturally cheats with every woman in his squad and turns into a Varren.
Liara commits suicide because she is blue, abba di abba die, abba de abba di.
Legion takes up his own dance studio with the rest of the geth, pioneering the use of Dubstep Break Dancing, and win the next years Galactic Dance Competition over the RDT.
The RDT, angered by betrayal and losing, use Earth in the annual Reaper Space Wimbleton.
Caius returns, and discovers the galaxy has become obesses with Armored Core, and therefore everyone fights inside of Giant Mecha. Angered by the use of Mecha, Goku and Vegeta combine into one, and fight the galaxy. The rest of the galaxy, afearing defeat, all board an Ark, piloted by Space Noah, and make their way to the nearest planet that is colored lime green with a tint of blue and robins blue egg.
Unfortunatly for the Saiyans and their multi-rainbow colored Asair allies, SUPER GALACTIC HEAVEN PIERCING GURRAN LAGANN stops them, and wins. They recover the bumbling arc, and watch a playthrough of Deus Ex, all saying, "I'm glad those stupid and silly Deus Ex endings ARE NOT in our game, right guys?!"
They then discover that they all were wrong, and that they are. They all commit suicide. Legion dying in the arms of Haley Williams, lead singer of Paramore, Garrus discovers his love of "Dat Ass" of Miranda before he dies.
There was a small group of survivors, but when authorities investigated...they found they all had puncture stab wounds, multiple ones that were fatally fatal....all caused by a Toothbrush.
And all of the Galaxys cerial had been abducted as well.
Fin
Let's have additions/suggestions/discussions/cheese.
I hope this made you laugh, and created a destress for you BSNers.
Modifié par SovereignWillReturn, 05 mars 2012 - 02:51 .
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