1717 réponses à ce sujet

[BattlemastaWrex]

I'm not gay, but I have family and friends who are and the homophobia really gets on my nerves. Feel free to friend me, but say that you're from BSN. My XBL GT is: NinthTruKiilla

[alek2702]

Rivermann wrote...
snip

It's not about segregation or grouping but simply creating an environment free of homophobic insults which are particularly widespread in the multiplayer community. Is it really so hard understand?

And yes, gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded.

Modifié par alek2702, 14 avril 2012 - 03:43 .

[xyzmkrysvr]

Doom Lich wrote...
Are there that many blatently homophobic people playing the game that this is necessary?

 

I wouldn’t have created this thread if I didn’t think it was necessary.
I’ve been called the F word more than five times since I started playing Mass Effect multiplayer… and that’s five times too many for my taste!

Ahms wrote...

Zerox Z21 wrote...

Ahms wrote...

Roninraver wrote...

Ahms wrote...
Please don't give me the victimization schpiel. Shrug it off and ignore it. Ignorance is everywhere. You can't go around feeling righteously indignant at anything and everything that upsets your sensibilities. Why? Because, ultimately, in the end it doesn't matter. What some bigot rages over the mic does not affect your personal, financial, or social and romantic life in any way, shape or form, whatsoever.
There's a mute option to squelch these types of people and maintain your emotional equilibrium. Make liberal use of it.

Or, they can form a group/community of friendly and like-minded people, and not have to worry about it ever occurring to begin with.
Which they were peacefully and maturely trying to do, before you and others like you told them to "suck it up" and ignore it.
They are ignoring it, genius.  By gaming with those who they don't have to worry about hearing that kind of junk from, they are insulating themselves from it and leaving the rest of the world to be as bigoted and idiotic as it wants to be.
Again, before you and those like you displayed a little righteous indignation of your own.
Don't like the thread/the concept behind the thread?  Door is over there.  Take your own advice and ignore it.

This post is all sorts of LOL. Making a THREAD ON THE INTERNET is not ignoring it.
Congratulations. You win the prize.
I don't know if I should continue to try and make you see reason or not. I'll reiterate: It's not a legitimately problematic, negatively life-altering phenomenon that should warrant serious concern. The day that it becomes one, I'll support this 100%. Until then, no dice.

You made a point of seeking out this thread just to criticise everyone in it. You can't do that then yell at us for 'not ignoring things by making a thread'. The fact that people like you saw this thread title and made a point of jumping
in surely says something about why people would make a thread like this. I think it's a nice idea. Our sexual orientation is just one of a number of things that groups of people might have in common, thus giving them common ground to form a community of sorts, because there are so many nasties out there.
You can be critical all you want, and say 'oh it's harmless' but you're not in that position yourself. Muting people constantly gets irritating, and besides which you face enough prejudice as is without having to face it in gaming
multiplayer. By itself it's not much, but it's a part of many sources of hate which eventually can get you down. You start worrying about going outdoors because of what you fear you might expect from some of the populace. So have the courtesy and decency to grant us some damn reprieve from all that by meeting with like-minded people without you coming in here and trying to find something to criticise. You're not being pleasant or having a logical discussion, you're being rather rude. You can't act like that and try to justify yourself as being some sort of voice of reason. Anyway...
Xbox: Zerox Z21
No mic though. Love hearing talkers though.

Your argument is invalid.
The idea of "the gay ME3 multiplayer community" makes no sense relative to "the ME3 multiplayer community." The only thing that makes sense is "the gay community." Also, "the gay online gaming community" to include the sphere of all games is redundant and unncessary. Here's another one, "the verbally abused online gamers community." We can keep progressing to absurdity, but I'm sure you get the idea. I hope.

Ahms, just because YOU do not agree with Zerox Z21 and Roninraver does NOT make their argument “invalid”. You are not some objective debate god who gets to pass judgment on the validity of everything you come across on the Internet. Kindly get off your high horse and, like maniacmad said, stop clogging up this thread with your off-topic rants.

You may not understand or agree with my reasoning, but you ought to at least respect my right to seek open-minded individuals on social networking forum. CLEARLY I’m not the only one interested in finding a like-minded group of gamers to play with, so there’s obviously demand for a thread such as this. Nothing you say will change that, so you’re fighting a losing battle in continuing to argue with us. Now, why don’t you go make a ham & cheese sandwich or do something a little more productive with your life?

BattlemastaWrex wrote...
I'm not gay, but I have family and friends who are and the homophobia really gets on my nerves. Feel free to friend me, but say that you're from BSN. My XBL GT is: NinthTruKiilla

BattlemastaWrex, I’m glad to hear that you’re bothered by homophobia as well. Too many people are willing to ignore it or pretend as though it isn’t a problem. Homophobia is a HUGE problem and it contributes to the grossly high suicide rate of LGBT youth.
Anyway, I’ll get off my soap box and add your name to the list!  

Modifié par xyzmkrysvr, 14 avril 2012 - 03:44 .

[Rivermann]

alek2702 wrote...

Rivermann wrote...
snip

It's not about segregation or grouping but simply creating an environment free of homophobic insults which are particularly widespread in the multiplayer community. Is it really so hard understand?

And yes, gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded.

Oh, okay. Thanks for the update, must've missed it. So it's just the homophobic insults, the religion and color etc is OK?

I have yet to hear a single homophobic remark in this game, coming from me, that kind of tells you something. Unless the first thing that comes out of your mouth the second you join the lobby is "Hey, I'm gay and I don't appreciate homophobic insults", it can't be that widespread as you want it to appear.

Edit: Also, the gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded... Doesn't that just leave one group? The non-gay-friendly people? Kind of makes sense

Modifié par Rivermann, 14 avril 2012 - 03:49 .

[maelstrome]

I've yet to hear any such slurs myself and I've played more than a few games. That being said, this type of thread kinda pisses me off. It reeks of a shallow attempt to make something into a political or social statement and rub it in everyone else's faces in the vein of Shannon Faulkner. If you don't want to be identified as gay, or a gamer, or as a race, or a geek, then the first step is to not identify yourself as such.

[alek2702]

Rivermann wrote...
Oh, okay. Thanks for the update, must've missed it. So it's just the homophobic insults, the religion and color etc is OK?

Of course racist comments are not OK, but when was the last time you heard someone say "That's really black!"? Whereas "That's gay" or "F*cking f***ot" are used constantly, especially on the net.

Rivermann wrote...

Edit: Also, the gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded... Doesn't that just leave one group? The non-gay-friendly people? Kind of makes sense

Yeah, I wouldn't call a person who dislikes someone because of their sexuality open-minded.

[xyzmkrysvr]

Rivermann wrote...
I find this thread offensive (Not really, but maybe I should...).
Bare with me, I couldn't care less about who you play with, but I'm sure I'm not the only one that comes on this forum looking for interesting topics about the game, nothing else.
I don't get it, as far as my experience goes, gay people are just as vulgar as the rest of the world. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but being gay doesn't change anything but what you find sexually attractive or am I wrong? Or does it make you take offense more easily, become more sensitive or?
You can call me names like a child bully would, eventually you'll probably get a few things right about me. I still wouldn't care. I don't know you, I don't value your opinions about me. I won't see you again. All I've gained about you is a 2 second thought thinking "Good luck in life kid".
If you are so sensitive that you can't tolerate someone saying nice ****** about a 3d model in a video game, you'll have a tough time in the real world and should probably stay indoors irrelevant of sexual orientation.
I honestly don't care about what people say, but if they are talking about stuff that is irrelevant to my gaming experience, I'll be leaving the game. Talk about dogs, cars, football or nude women and men, you name it, I'll be
leaving. But I'm not offended, I just don't feel like playing a game full of jibber jabber and crap talk.
Then you make a post about how gay people aren't narrow minded, vulgar and doesn't talk crap. I call bullsh*t on that one. I don't see how your sexual orientation can grant you those gifts.
Note to OP: I'm not talking about you, and I'm not trying to offend anyone. I'm just trying to say... you don't need this, and I don't want to see this on a gaming forum. Otherwise, what's next? A list of people grouped by religion, color of their skin, color of their eyes etc.  When you're done grouping up on everything, we'll all be left alone, and I thought this was multiplayer?
A modified topic and first post would make this thread more appealing, I just don't see how being gay actually has anything to do with it. Or is it just the sex that bothers you, religion and racism is OK or?
And now that you're done reading, you can add me on Origin ID: Rivermann. I don't care who you are, your sexual orientation or color. As long as you can handle yourself in silver and gold games and play as a team and keep the jibber jabber to a minimum, I'll gladly play with you.

Note to Rivermann: you’re right... I don’t “need” this.
But I created this thread because I WANT to find certain and specific people to play Mass Effect with and because I suspected that there are others out there who might WANT the same thing.

And frankly, I don’t care if you “don’t want to see this on a gaming forum.” 
The BSN CLEARLY states that I’m able to “use this forum to seek teammates.”

And this topic/thread is already “appealing” enough as it is, judging from the high interest and ridiculous amount of names I’ve already added to the list.
There is no reason for me to modify it just to mollify you.

And you’re not the first one who has oh-so-cleverly (*sarcasm*) suggested that other threads be created (“Any Blue Eyed Players Out There?” etc). If you feel the urge to create such threads, be my guest. But please don’t come into my humble and harmless thread asking asinine rhetorical questions and trying to goad forumites into off-topic discussions or sociological debates.

Anyway, I hope you have a nice day!

maelstrome wrote...
I've yet to hear any such slurs myself and I've played more than a few games. That being said, this type of thread kinda pisses me off. It reeks of a shallow attempt to make something into a political or social statement and rub it in everyone else's faces in the vein of Shannon Faulkner. If you don't want to be identified as gay, or a gamer, or as a race, or a geek, then the first step is to not identify yourself as such.

The fact that you, or anyone else on the BSN, could get “kinda pissed off” about a thread such as this is kinda sad. If it bothers you so much, don’t read it and CERTAINLY don’t post it in.  Thank you! (And I say thank you not because I value your comments or suggestions but because I appreciate the fact that your post bumped my thread, which will, hopefully, give the type of people I’m looking to play with (i.e. like-minded and open-minded individuals who are respectful and love Mass Effect) a chance to see it!

Modifié par xyzmkrysvr, 14 avril 2012 - 04:09 .

[mangrilla]

maelstrome wrote...

I've yet to hear any such slurs myself and I've played more than a few games. That being said, this type of thread kinda pisses me off. It reeks of a shallow attempt to make something into a political or social statement and rub it in everyone else's faces in the vein of Shannon Faulkner. If you don't want to be identified as gay, or a gamer, or as a race, or a geek, then the first step is to not identify yourself as such.

First, to the OP - Consider me a hetero ally and feel free to add me to your list.  I'm on 360, handle is Mangrilla.  I don't use a mic.

Maelstrome: I've certainly heard multiple people shout out "****got," both to players and the computer.  Whether an LGBT person identifies themselves doesn't really impact that at all.  I certainly doubt any players go online and immediately say "I'm going to be a vanguard, oh, and by the way, I'm gay."  Your response is ridiculous.  If the n-word were particularly prevalent in MP, and an African American started a thread looking for people who will play the game and not shout racial slurs, would that ****** you off too?  Would you tell him, "Look, you wouldn't have the problem of hearing people say the n-word if you just didn't identify yourself as black."  Hopefully not, because that's just an insane response.

It's not a political statement to just desire a comfortable place to enjoy yourself.  It's not a social statement to look for like-minded gamers.  If this thread pisses you off, it's because you have issues, not the OP.

[Roninraver]

Rivermann wrote...

alek2702 wrote...

Rivermann wrote...
snip

It's not about segregation or grouping but simply creating an environment free of homophobic insults which are particularly widespread in the multiplayer community. Is it really so hard understand?

And yes, gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded.

Oh, okay. Thanks for the update, must've missed it. So it's just the homophobic insults, the religion and color etc is OK?

I have yet to hear a single homophobic remark in this game, coming from me, that kind of tells you something. Unless the first thing that comes out of your mouth the second you join the lobby is "Hey, I'm gay and I don't appreciate homophobic insults", it can't be that widespread as you want it to appear.

Edit: Also, the gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded... Doesn't that just leave one group? The non-gay-friendly people? Kind of makes sense

No.  None of it is okay, ever.

But the people who have put up their Gamertags in this thread are mature enough to realize that the particular brand of bigotry that most offends and hurts them does exist, and politely asking those who throw slurs around to stop rarely (read: never) works.

So, they are exercising their right to free association.  They are forming a group of like-minded individuals, and eliminating the possibility of hearing the slurs to begin with.



What is wrong with that?  What could you possibly have against people deciding that they would rather not even face the possibility of being made to feel a lesser person because of some jerk's careless words?

In what universe is free association a bad thing?

[PaxtonFetel]

I think the main gay men in the office BW. In the game there was no acute need for this topic. This is my opinion.

[xyzmkrysvr]

mangrilla wrote...

maelstrome wrote...
I've yet to hear any such slurs myself and I've played more than a few games. That being said, this type of thread kinda pisses me off. It reeks of a shallow attempt to make something into a political or social statement and rub it in everyone else's faces in the vein of Shannon Faulkner. If you don't want to be identified as gay, or a gamer, or as a race, or a geek, then the first step is to not identify yourself as such.

First, to the OP - Consider me a hetero ally and feel free to add me to your list. I'm on 360, handle is Mangrilla. I don't use a mic.
Maelstrome: I've certainly heard multiple people shout out "****got," both to players and the computer. Whether an LGBT person identifies themselves doesn't really impact that at all. I certainly doubt any players go online and immediately say "I'm going to be a vanguard, oh, and by the way, I'm gay." Your response is ridiculous. If the n-word were particularly prevalent in MP, and an African American started a thread looking for people who will play the game and not shout racial slurs, would that ****** you off too? Would you tell him, "Look, you wouldn't have the problem of hearing people say the n-word if you just didn't identify yourself as black." Hopefully not, because that's just an insane response. It's not a political statement to just desire a comfortable place to enjoy yourself. It's not a social statement to look for like-minded gamers. If this thread pisses you off, it's because you have issues, not the OP.

Mangrilla… THANK YOU! You’re my new favorite person of the day

Roninraver wrote...

Rivermann wrote...

alek2702 wrote...

Rivermann wrote...
snip

It's not about segregation or grouping but simply creating an environment free of homophobic insults which are particularly widespread in the multiplayer community. Is it really so hard understand? And yes, gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded.

Oh, okay. Thanks for the update, must've missed it. So it's just the homophobic insults, the religion and color etc is OK? I have yet to hear a single homophobic remark in this game, coming from me, that kind of tells you something. Unless the first thing that comes out of your mouth the second you join the lobby is "Hey, I'm gay and I don't appreciate homophobic insults", it can't be that widespread as you want it to appear. Edit: Also, the gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded... Doesn't that just leave one group? The non-gay-friendly people? Kind of makes sense

No.  None of it is okay, ever. But the people who have put up their Gamertags in this thread are mature enough
to realize that the particular brand of bigotry that most offends and hurts them does exist, and politely asking those who throw slurs around to stop rarely (read: never) works. So, they are exercising their right to free association. They are forming a group of like-minded individuals, and eliminating the possibility of hearing the slurs to begin with. What is wrong with that?  What could you possibly have against people deciding that they would rather not even face the possibility of being made to feel a lesser person because of some jerk's careless words? In what universe is free association a bad thing?

And thank you, Roninraver! You’re my second favorite person of the day!
Seriously though: posts like yours reassure me that it was a good idea to create this thread. I was initially worried that no one would understand and there wouldn't be any interest, but, overall, I've been thrilled with the response I've gotten (apart from the few trolls this thread has inadvertently attracted... but that's to be expected!) 

Modifié par xyzmkrysvr, 14 avril 2012 - 04:20 .

[Rivermann]

alek2702 wrote...

Rivermann wrote...
Oh, okay. Thanks for the update, must've missed it. So it's just the homophobic insults, the religion and color etc is OK?

Of course racist comments are not OK, but when was the last time you heard someone say "That's really black!"? Whereas "That's gay" or "F*cking f***ot" are used constantly, especially on the net.

 

Not in this game as I've experienced... But I find racist remarks are more common than sexual ones. It doesn't bother me though, they can call it whatever they want. Gay isn't a foul/offensive word. You can also tell this as this forum censors those words.  

alek2702 wrote... 

Rivermann wrote...

Edit: Also, the gay and gay-friendly people are usually open-minded... Doesn't that just leave one group? The non-gay-friendly people? Kind of makes sense

Yeah, I wouldn't call a person who dislikes someone because of their sexuality open-minded.

I was merely pointing out that you used semantics. Glad you agree 

[Rivermann]

Roninraver wrote...

No.  None of it is okay, ever.

But the people who have put up their Gamertags in this thread are mature enough to realize that the particular brand of bigotry that most offends and hurts them does exist, and politely asking those who throw slurs around to stop rarely (read: never) works.

So, they are exercising their right to free association.  They are forming a group of like-minded individuals, and eliminating the possibility of hearing the slurs to begin with.

What is wrong with that?  What could you possibly have against people deciding that they would rather not even face the possibility of being made to feel a lesser person because of some jerk's careless words?

In what universe is free association a bad thing?

xyzmkrysvr wrote... 
Note to Rivermann: you’re right... I don’t “need” this.
But I created this thread because I WANT to find certain and specific people to play Mass Effect with and because I suspected that there are others out there who might WANT the same thing.

And frankly, I don’t care if you “don’t want to see this on a gaming forum.”  
The BSN CLEARLY states that I’m able to “use this forum to seek teammates.”

And this topic/thread is already “appealing” enough as it is, judging from the high interest and ridiculous amount of names I’ve already added to the list. 
There is no reason for me to modify it just to mollify you. 

And you’re not the first one who has oh-so-cleverly (*sarcasm*) suggested that other threads be created (“Any Blue Eyed Players Out There?” etc). If you feel the urge to create such threads, be my guest. But please don’t come into my humble and harmless thread asking asinine rhetorical questions and trying to goad forumites into off-topic discussions or sociological debates.

Anyway, I hope you have a nice day!

You missed the point of my post, it was never about being against like minded people. I just find the whole gay portion and topic title of this thread misleading and could be interpreted by many as provocative in several different ways, as you can see from the posts.

I'm all for friends that don't insult people because they are gay. I am also for friends that don't insult people, at all. What makes being gay so special? People get bashed for everything, what makes you stand out so much that you need your own thread about it? This doesn't mean I'm against you, it means it feels like you are leaving everybody else out.

I get your point, you want friendly people that can behave (irrelevant if they are gay or not), so why not just write that and leave the gay part inside rather than a topic. After all, friendly people that can behave, won't insult gay people. And they also won't insult anyone else. 

It's not about your rights to find like minded team mates, and I'm all for this thread if only it had been written in a different manner and topic and still give the same point and you know that.
I was pointing out that a combined thread with the same meaning rather than having several variations of these threads pop up like they have, which also appeared to have inspired homophobes and others to create their idea of an amusing thread that most of us here, don't appreciate, and I doubt you do either.

What's done is done, I don't see the need to modify it. But you would probably get more people if you used a different approach.

On a personal note though, I don't think topic based on a sexual orientation is appropriate for a forum like this, do you? I'm not sure how far the BSN will allow people to search for teammates. I've seen similar threads like this started only to get removed by a moderator although based on different sexual orientations, granted they could be just as serious and harmless as this one.

[redknightalex]

I'll be honest, when I first saw this thread I was going to stay with my lurker ways (hardly a post in this comm even if I come by every day) and see what happens. I'm open about my sexuality on the internet, but don't make a point about it mainly because I don't want it to define me. Then, after reading the responses and having someone on another server start making stupid jokes when he found out I was gay, I'd had enough. So, add me to the list!

Origin: redknightalex (same as BSN)
Mic: Yes. I normally play music during bronze/silver matches via my headphones and use my webcam as my mic. For gold, I mainly turn the music off.
Team player: Oh yes. Try to stay in teams and, even with my squishy AA, I do my best to clear a path to the downed teammate.
Other: I don't normally host but I readily accept invites. Play mainly 7-10pm EST.


As a response to the rest of this thread, I think that people don't understand that the mentality of "sticks and stones" is a fallacy. If the 20th century was about women's rights and race equality, the 21st entury is, so far, about gay/trans/gender rights. Furthermore, words actually hurt in a way someone's "sticks and stones" can't, and sometimes worse. They mess with your brain, make you question who you are, and become fearful of even the slightest hints of judgement. There's a reason why people will stay "in the closet" for decades and I don't blame them.

If the LGBTQA community wants to create an online group to prevent these potenntial hate words from coming across their speaker, I think they should applauded and not questioned for why they want it. Do you question, in real life, why there's a safe space for battered women/men? Or what about the homeless shelter downtown? What about the other LGBTQA spaces in real life? But, more importantly, do you grumble about the people who make groups for those who dislike/like the ending of ME3? No? Well, then let us have our space and stop debating on its legitimacy. If we want the internet to be based on free speech then we need to stop asking these groups "why" and let them be.

Hope to see some of you in-game!

[Rivermann]

redknightalex wrote...
As a response to the rest of this thread, I think that people don't understand that the mentality of "sticks and stones" is a fallacy. If the 20th century was about women's rights and race equality, the 21st entury is, so far, about gay/trans/gender rights. Furthermore, words actually hurt in a way someone's "sticks and stones" can't, and sometimes worse. They mess with your brain, make you question who you are, and become fearful of even the slightest hints of judgement. There's a reason why people will stay "in the closet" for decades and I don't blame them.

If the LGBTQA community wants to create an online group to prevent these potenntial hate words from coming across their speaker, I think they should applauded and not questioned for why they want it. Do you question, in real life, why there's a safe space for battered women/men? Or what about the homeless shelter downtown? What about the other LGBTQA spaces in real life? But, more importantly, do you grumble about the people who make groups for those who dislike/like the ending of ME3? No? Well, then let us have our space and stop debating on its legitimacy. If we want the internet to be based on free speech then we need to stop asking these groups "why" and let them be.

Hope to see some of you in-game!

I totally understand why words hurt, they hurt just as much for other people as well. Hope you get a ton of friends here

There's a difference between a video game forum and the safe space for battered women/men and I hope you know that. I doubt they go to those meetings for the same reason you are wanting to add friends here. And I don't think a thread specifically for them would be a good idea either.

But I suppose if you are wanting friends to talk about being gay etc. Then by all means, this thread has it's purpose and I'm genuinely happy for you.

I interpreted it as a thread where open minded people who are nice can get toghether and play with each other, with a misleading topic.

[xyzmkrysvr]

Rivermann wrote...
You missed the point of my post, it was never about being against like minded people. I just find the whole gay portion and topic title of this thread misleading and could be interpreted by many as provocative in several different ways, as you can see from the posts.
I'm all for friends that don't insult people because they are gay. I am also for friends that don't insult people, at all. What makes being gay so special? People get bashed for everything, what makes you stand out so much that you need your own thread about it? This doesn't mean I'm against you, it means it feels like you are leaving everybody else out.
I get your point, you want friendly people that can behave (irrelevant if they are gay or not), so why not just write that and leave the gay part inside rather than a topic. After all, friendly people that can behave, won't insult gay people. And they also won't insult anyone else.
It's not about your rights to find like minded team mates, and I'm all for this thread if only it had been written in a different manner and topic and still give the same point and you know that.
I was pointing out that a combined thread with the same meaning rather than having several variations of these threads pop up like they have, which also appeared to have inspired homophobes and others to create their idea of an amusing thread that most of us here, don't appreciate, and I doubt you do either.
What's done is done, I don't see the need to modify it. But you would probably get more people if you used a different approach.
On a personal note though, I don't think topic based on a sexual orientation is appropriate for a forum like this, do you? I'm not sure how far the BSN will allow people to search for teammates. I've seen similar threads like this started only to get removed by a moderator although based on different sexual orientations, granted they could be just as serious and harmless as this one.

Rivermann, since it is becoming increasingly apparent that you didn’t even bother to read my original post, I’ll copy and paste it here:

“To clarify: I'm not JUST looking for gay-players!
And I don't necessarily want to create a "gay-only team..."
I'd just like to find a group of open-minded individuals who aren't homophobic to play with.
So ANY member of the LGBTQIA community is welcome to sign up!
(The reason I said "any gay players" in the title of this thread as opposed to any "LGBTQIA" players is because that acronym is ridiculously long and really confusing to some people!)
But please don't assume I have a problem with straight people (or bisexuals or what have you) I'm not heterophobic... Just cautious. I've played with too many random people who say things like "geth hunters are SO gay!" or "that guy just wasted a missile on a pack of phantoms...? What a f*****g f****t!"
Now, I certainly can't speak for everyone in the gay community, but I take serious offense to that.
However, I *do* think everyone here is totally willing to play with straight allies (we you guys! ), so please don't be shy if you aren't gay!”

While it would be nice if everyone read the OP before posting, I certainly don’t blame people for not wasting the time to read through ALL 15 pages of this thread!
Although if you *had*, you would have observed countless times in which other like-minded forumites and I have eloquently explained our reasoning and addressed concerns such as the ones you’ve presented. However, it gets EXHAUSTING answering the same questions over and over again.

Now, the previous thread that had a similar aim as the one I created was locked NOT because the topic was deemed inappropriate but because it was overrun with trolls who started a flame war.

This thread will exist so long as there is interest in it and everyone tries to stay on-topic.
It will only be locked if it becomes clogged with off-topic arguments (rather like yours).
So I would kindly ask you to send me a PM if you wish to continue this discussion.

[Quxorda]

I'm still confused as to why the people who are upset about this threads existence keep posting in it. And why they are upset to begin with. Some people are just drama queens I guess.

OP wanted to find people to play with that share something in common with him/her, OP created this thread. People liked the idea and posted their IDs. Not sure what else needs to be said or why there is so much discussion going on here really, aside from possible trolls looking for an easy thread target.

[Zerox Z21]

Quxorda wrote...

I'm still confused as to why the people who are upset about this threads existence keep posting in it. And why they are upset to begin with. Some people are just drama queens I guess.

OP wanted to find people to play with that share something in common with him/her, OP created this thread. People liked the idea and posted their IDs. Not sure what else needs to be said or why there is so much discussion going on here really, aside from possible trolls looking for an easy thread target.

This, bothers me most, especially relating to issues such as gay marriage. It doesn't affect you directly, so don't place yourself in the way on purpose and complain. Like wise, don't look at and post in this thread and then complain about it's content.

And there is a rather impressive list on that front page of IDs. No one can say this thread is pointless or unneeded because clearly because of all those IDs that tells you something: that we are very interested and caring about this subject.

[xyzmkrysvr]

Rivermann wrote...

redknightalex wrote...
As a response to the rest of this thread, I think that people don't understand that the mentality of "sticks and stones" is a fallacy. If the 20th century was about women's rights and race equality, the 21st entury is, so far, about gay/trans/gender rights. Furthermore, words actually hurt in a way someone's "sticks and stones" can't, and sometimes worse. They mess with your brain, make you question who you are, and become fearful of even the slightest hints of judgement. There's a reason why people will stay "in the closet" for decades and I don't blame them.
If the LGBTQA community wants to create an online group to prevent these potenntial hate words from coming across their speaker, I think they should applauded and not questioned for why they want it. Do you question, in real life, why there's a safe space for battered women/men? Or what about the homeless shelter downtown? What about the other LGBTQA spaces in real life? But, more importantly, do you grumble about the people who make groups for those who dislike/like the ending of ME3? No? Well, then let us have our space and stop debating on its legitimacy. If we want the internet to be based on free speech then we need to stop asking these groups "why" and let them be.
Hope to see some of you in-game!

I totally understand why words hurt, they hurt just as much for other people as well. Hope you get a ton of friends here
There's a difference between a video game forum and the safe space for battered women/men and I hope you know that. I doubt they go to those meetings for the same reason you are wanting to add friends here. And I don't think a thread specifically for them would be a good idea either.
But I suppose if you are wanting friends to talk about being gay etc. Then by all means, this thread has it's purpose and I'm genuinely happy for you.
I interpreted it as a thread where open minded people who are nice can get toghether and play with each other, with a misleading topic.

redknightalex: You seem like a very insightful and intelligent individual! It’s too bad we’re on different systems, cause I would have enjoyed playing with you! Anyway, I added your name to the list and hope you and the other PC players that have posted in this thread have fun killing Reapers together!

Rivermann: When I originally created this thread, I was—first and foremost—interested in finding “gaymers” to play with, hence the title of the thread. I later clarified in the OP that I did not intend on being exclusive and that I’m absolutely willing to play with anyone who is a member of the LGBTQIA community (the “A” can stand for either “asexual” or straight “ally”).
However, a thread titled “Any LGBTQIA or open-minded players out there?” would get instantly buried under the deluge of threads complaining about vanguards.
In keeping the title of this thread “Any Gay Players Out There”, I made a strategic choice. Yes, it attracts trolls but they serve a purpose; namely, they bump my thread and grant it more visibility, which, in turn, gives forumites a chance to read it and, hopefully, add their ID to the growing list.

Also, on an unrelated side note: you misspelled “compromise” in your signature.

[Rivermann]

xyzmkrysvr wrote...
...

This will be last post as I think we understand each other now. 

I did read it, thats why I think the title is misleading and is too heavily focused. You could've done it better. But you don't. Difference of opinion and thats life.

I think it's a great thing, and I'll quote this guy for saying it well:

Zerox Z21 wrote... 
No one can say this thread is pointless or unneeded because clearly because of all those IDs that tells you something: that we are very interested and caring about this subject. 

 

xyzmkrysvr wrote...
Also, on an unrelated side note: you misspelled "compromise" in your signature.

 
And I won't do it! 

Modifié par Rivermann, 14 avril 2012 - 05:34 .

[xyzmkrysvr]

Zerox Z21 wrote...

Quxorda wrote...
I'm still confused as to why the people who are upset about this threads existence keep posting in it. And why they are upset to begin with. Some people are just drama queens I guess. OP wanted to find people to play with that share something in common with him/her, OP created this thread. People liked the idea and posted their IDs. Not sure what else needs to be said or why there is so much discussion going on here really, aside from possible trolls looking for an easy thread target.

This, bothers me most, especially relating to issues such as gay marriage. It doesn't affect you directly, so don't place yourself in the way on purpose and complain. Like wise, don't look at and post in this thread and then complain about it's content.
And there is a rather impressive list on that front page of IDs. No one can say this thread is pointless or unneeded because clearly because of all those IDs that tells you something: that we are very interested and caring about this subject.

Quxorda and Zerox Z21… you’re both awesome and said everything that needs to be said better than I ever could have!

[maelstrome]

mangrilla wrote...

First, to the OP - Consider me a hetero ally and feel free to add me to your list.  I'm on 360, handle is Mangrilla.  I don't use a mic.

Maelstrome: I've certainly heard multiple people shout out "****got," both to players and the computer.  Whether an LGBT person identifies themselves doesn't really impact that at all.  I certainly doubt any players go online and immediately say "I'm going to be a vanguard, oh, and by the way, I'm gay."  Your response is ridiculous.  If the n-word were particularly prevalent in MP, and an African American started a thread looking for people who will play the game and not shout racial slurs, would that ****** you off too?  Would you tell him, "Look, you wouldn't have the problem of hearing people say the n-word if you just didn't identify yourself as black."  Hopefully not, because that's just an insane response.

It's not a political statement to just desire a comfortable place to enjoy yourself.  It's not a social statement to look for like-minded gamers.  If this thread pisses you off, it's because you have issues, not the OP.

I was talking about internal identification, not external. And yes, this is a social statement; there are more appropriate places and ways to discuss this than to make a pride parade thread in a game forum. If the OP didn't want it to be about homosexuality and just wanted to invite a player list that doesn't use slurs or harsh language then I doubt anyone would care. However, he has used intentionally provactive words and language which singles out a specific cause or group. 
Even if that was not the intent of the OP, that is what it has come across as, and in communication that is important. 

Oh and before anyone writes me off as a basher or hater, I have homosexual friends, and was a part of the gay/straight alliance in highschool. I don't care about that. What does get under my skin is when it is worn on the sleeve and made an issue of when and where not appropriate. 

Like here.

In any event I have expressed my opinion on the topic and I doubt that I will have much more to add or detract, depending on your viewpoint. I welcome any comentary [heck I posted this in a publically accessible forum!], but I can't promise that I will return and respond in kind.

[xyzmkrysvr]

maelstrome wrote...

mangrilla wrote...
First, to the OP - Consider me a hetero ally and feel free to add me to your list. I'm on 360, handle is Mangrilla. I don't use a mic.
Maelstrome: I've certainly heard multiple people shout out "****got," both to players and the computer. Whether an LGBT person identifies themselves doesn't really impact that at all. I certainly doubt any players go online and immediately say "I'm going to be a vanguard, oh, and by the way, I'm gay." Your response is ridiculous. If the n-word were particularly prevalent in MP, and an African American started a thread looking for people who will play the game and not shout racial slurs, would that ****** you off too? Would you tell him, "Look, you wouldn't have the problem of hearing people say the n-word if you just didn't identify yourself as black." Hopefully not, because that's just an insane response.
It's not a political statement to just desire a comfortable place to enjoy yourself. It's not a social statement to look for like-minded gamers. If this thread pisses you off, it's because you have issues, not the OP.

I was talking about internal identification, not external. And yes, this is a social statement; there are more appropriate places and ways to discuss this than to make a pride parade thread in a game forum. If the OP didn't want it to be about homosexuality and just wanted to invite a player list that doesn't use slurs or harsh language then I doubt anyone would care. However, he has used intentionally provactive words and language which singles out a specific cause or group.
Even if that was not the intent of the OP, that is what it has come across as, and in communication that is important.
Oh and before anyone writes me off as a basher or hater, I have homosexual friends, and was a part of the gay/straight alliance in highschool. I don't care about that. What does get under my skin is when it is worn on the sleeve and made an issue of when and where not appropriate.
Like here.
In any event I have expressed my opinion on the topic and I doubt that I will have much more to add or detract, depending on your viewpoint. I welcome any comentary [heck I posted this in a publically accessible forum!], but I can't promise that I will return and respond in kind.

Maelstrome, I’d suggest you not let silly little things like threads on a gaming forum on the Internet “get under your skin.”

Interestingly enough, the moderators *might* end up locking this thread because of off-topic rants like yours but the BSN is very clear in that it allows me to create threads “seeking teammates” if I want.

So, if anything, posts like *yours* are considered to be inappropriate, NOT threads like mine.

[SonsofNorthWind]

Brownfinger wrote...

Eebatsama wrote...
It's like me wanting to meet up with other twenty-somethings from massachusetts, we have a lot in common and have more fun together because of it.

Wicked true.
Play with me, though, and watch your points come up as empty as Buckner's glove. You'd have an easier time scoring as a Yankees fan at the Big Easy, pa.

Sorry. I just saw "The Departed" for like the sixth time. Love that movie.

Alright, all the anti-gay slurs in this thread are one thing, but when you bring the great state of Massachusetts into it you better watch it, buddy.  Pal. 

Tag: Foolswalkin

I'm kinda a terrible shot, but I do fine as Engineer/Adept/Vanguard on Silver.  Also, as a bonus I don't use racial OR gender OR sexual orientation slurs... I'd much rather hate people for their individual shortcomings than judge them on the group they belong to.  

[KTheAlchemist]

maelstrome wrote...
If the OP didn't want it to be about homosexuality and just wanted to invite a player list that doesn't use slurs or harsh language then I doubt anyone would care.

I wish I had your faith in people.

First, the issue of being "about homosexuality". The thing is, while racial slurs do happen in gaming, in my experience they're nowhere near as prevalent as the constant "that's so ****ing gay", and "you ****ing f****t".

While the title, perhaps, could have been chosen better, I'll admit.

That said...

Do you really believe that if the title had focused on eliminating anti-gay slurs instead, that we wouldn't have the negative reaction this has gotten from some people?