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[gotthammer]

Bhatair wrote...

Alistair: "Soo... care tell me again why our stash in Soldier's Peak is full of all these different maps of Ferelden?"

Warden: "Nah, you'll figure it out later."

[Recidiva]

Bhatair wrote...

Alistair: "Soo... care tell me again why our stash in Soldier's Peak is full of all these different maps of Ferelden?"

Warden: "Nah, you'll figure it out later."

Hah!  Made me snort.  *giggle aftershocks*

[Seallyn]

Asante81,



Your story was really good and your english is awesome. Definitely keep writing!!!

[Bhatair]

Warden: "Here, Morrigan I need you to drink this potion."



Morrigan: "Ugh, this looks disgusting! Where did you get this?"



W: "Uhhhh, a little bird gave it to me...."

[Shady314]

Xandurpein wrote...
Morrigan: Why do you think I fell for you in the first place? I respected you for your determination. You forged your own destiny and triumphed against all odds.
Morrigan: And I'll miss you. Missing you will be so much better than loosing my respect for you, because you won't let go.

? Try again.

[Recidiva]

*on the Road*

Me: Ladies, today we're going to give it a try. We're going to try to NOT walk like musclebound gorillas.
Leliana: What's a gorilla?
Me: Hm. Good point. Okay, scratch that. We're going to try to NOT walk like musclebound Genlocks.
Morrigan: I'm sure I do not.
Me: I'm sure we ALL do. I don't get it. Shayle is the only one with the shoulder breadth to justify holding arms out to the side like that. And even she doesn't do it.
Leliana: You're very graceful.
Me: That's sweet, but I'm in full plate which entirely conceals any grace, AND I walk like a musclebound Genlock with my elbows out like a cowboy about to draw.
Leliana: What's a cowboy?
Morrigan: You do seem to be correct. I cannot rest my arms at this angle.
Me: I hate it. I want to be a girl.
Leliana: You are a girl!
Me: But I don't WALK like one.
Wynne: We could try that thing where you wear a book on your head.
Me: Fine idea. And you do have a lot of books.
Wynne: Thank you!
Me: Right. At camp, we're going to work on our posture and gait.
Morrigan: Now I'm obsessed with my elbows.
Me: Sorry, it just had to be done. Don't tell Shayle what I said about her shoulders. I don't want to make her cry and/or beat me to death.

Modifié par Recidiva, 12 décembre 2009 - 01:34 .

[Asante81]

Recidiva wrote...

*on the Road*

Me: Ladies, today we're going to give it a try. We're going to try to NOT walk like musclebound gorillas.
Leliana: What's a gorilla?
Me: Hm. Good point. Okay, scratch that. We're going to try to NOT walk like musclebound Genlocks.
Morrigan: I'm sure I do not.
Me: I'm sure we ALL do. I don't get it. Shayle is the only one with the shoulder breadth to justify holding arms out to the side like that. And even she doesn't do it.
Leliana: You're very graceful.
Me: That's sweet, but I'm in full plate which entirely conceals any grace, AND I walk like a musclebound Genlock with my elbows out like a cowboy about to draw.
Leliana: What's a cowboy?
Morrigan: You do seem to be correct. I cannot rest my arms at this angle.
Me: I hate it. I want to be a girl.
Leliana: You are a girl!
Me: But I don't WALK like one.
Wynne: We could try that thing where you wear a book on your head.
Me: Fine idea. And you do have a lot of books.
Wynne: Thank you!
Me: Right. At camp, we're going to work on our posture and gait.
Morrigan: Now I'm obsessed with my elbows.
Me: Sorry, it just had to be done. Don't tell Shayle what I said about her shoulders. I don't want to make her cry and/or beat me to death.

*laughs*
I had a conversation about exactly that with my brother about an hour ago. We both agreed that women walk around like a crossbreed of cowboys with big balls and gorillas...

[Recidiva]

Asante81 wrote...

*laughs*
I had a conversation about exactly that with my brother about an hour ago. We both agreed that women walk around like a crossbreed of cowboys with big balls and gorillas...

It is such a glaring thing.  Makes me crazed.  I get so distracted in cutscenes.  That and the "four point" turn that women seem to have to make in those tight skirts.

I know you guys have motion capture!  I know it!  Cough it up on the walk!

[Asante81]

Yeah... the strange thing is, there are so smooth and NICE animations when you're finishing off ogres and dragons for example. Why couldn't they at least add another walking animation for women? It's ok... not great, but ok... for men, but women look terrible with it.

EDIT: goodness, already 3am, I'm writing a god damn novel again and am not even at the point of talking to Alistair. *bonks her head on the table*
There definitely will be at least a third part about Ostagar...

Modifié par Asante81, 12 décembre 2009 - 02:09 .

[Asante81]

I'm still smiling, even if talking to Loghain wasn't as satisfying as I
had thought it would be and decide to introduce my knee to his privates
next time. Without any further word. My smile broadens about the
imagination of his reaction. I stop at the bonfire, nod in the dead
man's direction and give Mischief a cuddle and scratch behind the ears
before I continue my way to the kennel master.
I approach him from behind and lay a hand on his shoulder.
Me: "Don't worry, I'll bring you a flower later that will cure your Mabari. But sadly I won't be able to accept his imprinting because I already have a Mabari. I bet Mischief wouldn't be happy about it."
He is very confused but I don't care. I give him a hug.
Me: "It's good to know that there are still humans out there who care for other beings. Thank you."
I actually didn't hug him because of that, but because I wanted to empty his pockets. I give him a friendly smile.
Kennel master: "Eh... thank you, Mylady."
Me: "You're welcome." Especially for the content of your pockets, but I'm not going to tell him that, of course. I pat his back a last time.
Me: "Don't worry and see you tonight."
I walk past the meager tree standing in the middle of the old road an
stroll past the praying soldiers. Dear Maker, thank you very much for
creating a culture of worship that draws everyone's attention to a
woman in a dress while being orderly lined up, which is all a thief
could ever pray for. Picking their pockets is as easy as pissing in a
lake you're swimming in.
To my annoyance none of them is carrying
around anything in his pockets. I sigh and count the few coppers I
snatched from the kennelmaster. I grumble something about greedy
clerics and cross the street again.
I stop behind Daveth and listen
to his pathetic tries of convincing a female warrior to join him in his
tent later on. I'm considering to tell him that, even if his pitiable
chat-up lines would be successful, he would be the one not being able
to attend the rendezvous because of being dead. I decide against
telling him.Given his past he would most likely go and try to molest
some woman before our little excursion into the wilds.
The warrior finally leaves and he turns around.
Daveth: "Well, you're not what I thought you'd be."
Me: "You
didn't think I would be... blond? Alive? Human? Armed and armored?
Ready to gut anyone who wants to get into my unmentionables?" I'm
closing my eyes, slowly rubbing my temples in circular movements,
pretending to concentrate. "Oh wait.... female!"
I can see the disappointment on his face.
Daveth: "Ah well, what shall I say..." He's trying to save the situation with what he thinks is a charming smile.
Me:
"Nothing. And no, I'm not interested in your theories about the joining
ritual or your past. Be a good boy and go to Duncan." I point towards
the fire.
He looks like a sad dog, but does as commanded. I cannot say I pity him.
I finally approach the quartermaster.
Quartermaster: "Have you seen an elf running about? Young woman, red hair? Carrying a suit of chain?"
Me:
"Hmmm... let me think about it... about that size?" I hold raise my
hand to the average, means exact, height of elven women.
Quartermaster: "Yes, have you seen her?"
Me: "Red hair you say?"
Quartermaster: "Yes, red hair."
Me: "There are a lot of elves running around having red hair, you know..."
Quartermaster: "Yeah, bloody elves. All inbred and stupid as a donkey."
Now
I dislike him even more. I make a mental note to let my red haired
elven lass have a little fun with him after she will have slain the
brat who raped her red haired relatives. I smile at him.
Me: "Well, I guess not many of them are carrying a suit of chain I guess."
Quartermaster snorts out something like a laugh, I guess, and spits on the ground: "They cannot even follow easy instructions, can they?"
Me: "No
they can't. That's why I've seen her walking down the road to Lothering.
With your suit of chain of course. Bet the little thief is trying to
steal it."
Quartermaster appears surprised: "You did? That blasted... Are you sure it was her?"
Me: "How
many young female elves with red hair do you see running around camp
carrying a suit of chain? And you can ask Duncan if you don't believe
me. He was with me."
He storms past me spitting out more nasty things about elves, but eventually comes back before reaching the first tree.
Quartermaster: "Blasted! I cannot leave my shop..."
Me: "Oh, don't worry, she isn't far down the road. You can catch up to her in about... 10minutes. I guess. Why don't you go and get your stuff back while I... keep an eye on your shop? I mean, I would get her myself, but I'm not allowed to leave the camp yet, you see?"
He tilts his head and I can almost see him think. I give him a friendly smile.
Quartermaster: "Ah... blasted. You're a Grey Warden. Think I can trust you."
Me: "Yes, you can. Now go and get that elf. I'm going to take a look at your wares while you're away. I need some supplies. That way I can make sure no one tries something."
Quartermaster: "All right, I'll..."
Me: "You need to hurry, before she's hiding in the woods. You know how elves are if they're between trees."
Quartermaster: "Blasted! You're right!"
He runs away as fast as he can. As soon as he's out of sight, I'm helping myself to some of his wares. Most of it is junk anyway.
Now that my bags are full of potions, metal shards, trap triggers and plans for traps, I leave the area. I take a few steps up the ramp, closer to Alistair. My heart jumps excitedly about the thought of him standing up there. I think, that I can almost hear him.
Me: "No... stupid... charming... boy... I wanted to go for Zev and Lel this time."
I keep standing there and mumble: "Zev and Lel, Zev and Lel."
Guard: "Is something wrong with you?"
I can't hide my surprise and stare at him. I didn't hear him come.
Me: "Oh... no, I'm fine. Eh... thank you."
I run back down the ramp. There are still a few things to do before picking Al up. And I could punch myself. I know I will end up in his arms again.
I go up the other ramp, leaving Wynne behind me. Even the thought about enduring one of her lectures makes me shudder. Not if I can avoid it. And this one, I can.
I try picking some of the pockets of more praying guards but their pockets are empty too, to my disappointment. Not even Jory has anything with him. I decide to skip the conversation with him. He's dead meat anyway. Boring and whiny dead meat who cannot even die in honor. But, well, not my problem. It's his decision. I wonder how many cowards Duncan already had to kill with his own hands during the Joining.
I approach the guard in front of the cages.
I nod and smile at him.
Me: "Could you do me a favour?"
Guard: "What do you want?" He's still as grumpy as ever. I decide to play a bit with him before telling him what I really want.
I put up my "sad girl" face and look down to my feet.
Me: "Oh... I... I just thought... you seem so lonely back here. I thought you might want some... company..." I try to sound as girlish as possible. His facial expression weakens.
Guard: "I am indeed lonely back here." He sighs. "I wish they would give me a real task. I'm a soldier. Not a jailor." He sighs again.
I try to sound "purry": "Well, at least the post back here has a good side..."
Guard: "And that would be?"
Me: "No one's ever going to disturb anything you would... do... back here... "
Guard turns half around and looks at the prisoner.
Me: "Besides him of course, but... " I go closer to him. "He is as good as dead anyway... so he doesn't matter..."
Guard: "Hmmm I suppose you are right. So... do you have any suggestions what ... I... could do, not being watched by anyone?" He comes closer and makes a flirty face.
Me: "I'm glad you're asking. Give me your lunch and five minutes with the prisoner while you're taking a little... stroll around the camp." I take his hand, put a few copper in it and push him towards the religious gathering. "Thank you!"
I don't even take my time to enjoy his disappointed and confused expression and approach the naked guy in the cage.
Prisoner: "Heh... someone finally comes and talks to the lone prisoner? I don't suppose you've come to sentence me."
Me: "Aw... what a cute little monkey you are." I take a stick and poke him.
Prisoner: "Eh? What the..."
Me: "Come on... little monkey, dance for me!"
Prisoner: "I'm not a... wha..."
Me: "My, my... monkey doesn't want to dance." I poke him even more.
Prisoner: "Eh... help? Someone? There's a mad woman tortur.."
Me: "Monkey monkey! Do the monkey dance!"
Prisoner: "HELP!"
I poke harder.
Prisoner: "Maker! I wish someone would finally senten..."
Me: "Stupid monkey... throw your poo at me!"
Prisoner: "WHAT?!?"
Me: "Are you deaf? Be a proper monkey and THROW YOUR POO AT ME!" I give him a hard poke in the groin.
The prisoner howls and collapses. I poke him a bit more in the sides.
Prisoner whimpers after a while: "Why in the name of the Maker are you doing this?"
Me: "I want your key." I stop poking him.
Prisoner: "Wha... how... I don't know what you are talking about."
I moan and threaten to poke him more. He crouches in a defensive position.
Me: "Maker... give me the key and I'll be gone."
Prisoner: "I don't..."
Me: "Don't think me for a fool, thief. I know why you're in here. Just give me the key and I'll give you the guard's lunch."
He stares suspiciously at the stick.
Prisoner: "You're going to stop poking me?"
I throw the stick away.
Me: "Maker, you would have been the most pathetic soldier anyway... Do you give me the damn key now or not?"
Prisoner: "You're... offering me food for the key?"
Me: "Are you deaf or simply stupid?" I know that I sound impatient and to emphasize that I take a look at the stick and pretend to reach out my hand to pick it up again.
Prisoner: "All right, all right... but... how did you...?"
I push the food through the bars of the cage and take the key in return.
Me: "Either I'm an apostate and can read your mind or the mage wasn't as drunk as you thought he was or you're talking in your sleep or this is just a game and I've played that part of it way too often. Your decision."
I put the smelly key in my pockets and turn around without awaiting an anwser or a further comment.
I turn back the way I came, sneak past Jory in case he might want to talk to me and jump down the ramp near the infirmary which leads to the exit gate. Not that I would be trying to leave the camp. Not without Duncan telepathically telling the guard I'm allowed to leave. I turn left instead and watch the Ash Warrior leader give some orders to the read haired elf. There really are a lot of red haired elves running around. But before talking to the dog warrior, I catch the elves' sleeve to stop him from running away from me.
Messenger: "Hello? Is there something you needed?"
Me: "Indeed. I need a sword. Eh... the sword, I mean."
Messenger: "I'm not sure..."
Me: "It's Ser Garlen's sword. I'm supposed to pick it up."
Messenger: "Eh..."
Me: "Ser Garlen won't be pleased about any further delay in the delivery of his sword. I can assure you. You don't want to anger Ser Garlen, do you?"
Messenger: "Oh... no, of course not." He hurries to hand me the sword. "Is there anything else you needed?"
Me: "Yes. Tell Alistair to prepare for some "lamp post licking" after coming back from the Wilds, before we're going to fight our way through the Tower of Ishal and getting ourselves almost killed..."
Messenger: "Pardon me?"
I sigh.
Me: "Forget it... Thank you for the free sword. I mean, Ser Garlen will be very pleased. About you... that is."
I smile at him and wave him off. He gives me an insecure smile in return. I almost pity him. But it's such a nice and shiny sword. Alistair will like it.
I come past the fire again and, like the last time, smile and nod at Duncan before giving Mischief a hug and a scratch. Duncan nods in return, but raises an eyebrow this time, like a silent question.
Duncan: "Do you require help in finding Alistair?"
Me: "Oh, no no.. I know where he is."
Duncan: "Do you require help with... anything else then?"
Me: "No, but thank you for asking. Do I appear that lost?"
Duncan: "Well, you're coming by the fire for the second time now. Without Alistair."
Me: "Ah. I'm just doing this and that. Helping some people around..."
I'm walking around the fire, closer to Duncan.
Me: "Duncan, may I ask you a question?"
Duncan: "Of course you may, but don't you have more important things to do?"
Me: "Besides listening to Wynne for an hour going on about the origin of darkspawn and the Chant of Light? No, not really."
Duncan: "Ah, so you've met Wynne then. She's quite a remarkable woman, I heard."
Me: "I'm sure Irving thinks she's remarkable. Her bosom is quite... firm, for her age. But if she ever tries to lecture me again about my relationship with A... eh... man..."
Duncan appears slightly confused: "Pardon me... what?!?"
Me: "Oh, nothing. Forget that. I actually didn't want to talk about Wynne and her bosom."
Duncan: "What was it then, you wanted to know of me?"
Me: "Duncan, that earring of yours..:"
Duncan: "My earring... yes? What is with my earring?"
Me: "I've never seen any man wearing an earring like that who wasn't a pirate..."
Duncan raises an eyebrow.
Duncan: "So, do you want to know if I'm a pirate then? Say, child, how many pirates have you seen in your life?"
Me: "Well, there was... " I pretend to count with my fingers. "this one... and... that... and... actually none." I shrug and put up a disarming smile.
Duncan laughs.
Duncan: "Your father was definitely sure about you. You are different."
Me: "Different is good. So what's with your piracy now? You're wearing an earring, you're dual-wielding, your armor has engravings of stylised waves or something that looks like waves..." I put my head closer to his chest and let a finger run along the swirling circles of the adornments.
Duncan clears his throat and gently pushes me away.
Me: "Oh, sorry... I... eh..."
Duncan: "We should not forget the gravity of the situation. I think we both have to do more important things than... that."
I sigh.
Me: "You know, I just wanted to get to know you a bit better before... eh... the battle. You know..." because you will be dead soon and I want to know you a bit better to share this with Alistair after our hours in my tent. Which I only add mentally, of course.
Duncan: "I know this is new for you and you must be nervous about the Joining and everything. You have just lost your family. It must be very difficult for you to deal with this. But there will be enough time for us to get to know each other better after the upcoming battle. And who knows, maybe I'll tell you about my armor then." 
I'm rather sure I can see the hint of a smile under his beard. Too sad he's going to die. Really... I feel like giving him a hug and telling him that it was a pleasure to meet him. He would clearly misunderstand that... ah, screw that.
So, I give him a hug and mumble "Thank you and it was a pleasure to meet you" into his ear. Shall he think whatever he wants, he's dead anyway.
As I let go of him I recognise irritation on his face, which makes me smile.
Me: "Ah, old man, don't think the wrong thing. You'll understand. Later. Anyway, I guess I should go and do more important things like... talking to Alistair, I guess. See you afterwards. And do me a favour and... forget the last few minutes."
He shakes his head with a smile.
I bring a few steps distance between me and Duncan, close my eyes and go through my mental checklist of things I wanted to do before talking to Alistair. I'm making a fat mental line through "Talking to Jory" and "Talking to Wynne" and directly go to the point with the Ash Warrior's story. Good thing I'm standing almost in front of him. I check my bags for the ale I brought along as preparation and approach him.
Ash Warrior Leader: "What do you need? You haven't brought more instructions from the teyrn, I hope."
Me: "Do I look like a messenger?"
He simply shrugs as an answer.
Me: "Well, I just heard the teyrn telling the messenger boy that you and your men are nothing but a bunch of sissies and that you should be happy that he's feeding you and your filthy mongrels' mouths instead of letting you rot in the Wilds until the darkspawn do the only good thing they've ever done and rid Ferelden of the stench of wet dogs. I just thought you would like to know that..."
I reach into my bags for the ale as I watch him turn red - literally. He roars and the Mabari at his side joins him. The warrior draws his twohander and I hold the ale in front of him, which seems to pull him out of his rage. He is still smoldering red with the magic of rage but the anger in his face is mixed with confusion now. Seems like I was right with my theory of the connection between Oghrens discipline and his alcohol consume. It calms them down to a certain extent until it makes it even worse for them to control the anger.
Ash Warrior Leader: "Woman, step aside to let me butcher that son-of-a-**** or you'll join him!"
Me: "Calm down, my friend, calm down." I push the stein of ale against his chest. He growls at me. Maybe... I wasn't right then...
Me: "Think! What will happen if you're storming into the teyrn's tent and decapitate him where he stands?" Oh, I would like to watch that. Sure I would.  
The Ash Warrior lets his blade sing. The rage is still emanating from his body, though.
Me: "I can tell you what's going to happen. As soon as all the guards along the short way to his tent see you with your sword, they'll know what you're going to do. You and your dog will be able to kill quite a few of them. But there's still the whole army around the corner. And this will be just exactly what he wants. Remember the thing with the dogs? You need to show him and the rest of Ferelden that you and your noble warhounds are better than that!" Too sad he will die later anyway.
His facial expression switches from furious to disgruntled, he sheathes his sword, grabs the stein and drinks the ale. The visible rage vanishes. So there is some sort of connection it seems. Fascinating. His dog calms down too and curls up next to his master's feet. The rage leaves as fast as it comes.
Ash Warrior Leader: "Is there anything else you want?"
Me: "Actually... yes, indeed, there's something I want from you."
Ash Warrior Leader: "And what?"
Me: "Could you tell me that fascinating story about Luthias the Dwarfson again please?"
The warrior punches his eyes.
Ash Warrior Leader: "Have we met before?"
Me: "Not directly. I mean, another Ash Warrior once told me about it, but I have a terrible memory, you see?"
Ash Warrior Leader: "I'm not a bard. Go and bother someone else."
Me: "No, I want to hear it from you." Because your comrades don't want to talk to me at all... but I keep that to myself, of course.
Ash Warrior Leader: "I am busy."
Me: "I know, for a fact, that you're not."
Ash Warrior Leader: "How do you want to know that?"
Me: "Oh, I'm watching you for a while. You're just standing around, staring holes in the tent on the other side of the road. And come on, you do like to talk about the Ash Warrior's glory, don't you?"
He grumbles. I take that as a yes.
Me: "Come on. I'll even start for you. There was this Clayne tribesman called Luthias. He was rather short and everyone mocked him. He went to the dwarves where he learnt the art of using your rage as a weapon..."
Ash Warrior Leader: "If you remember the tale so good, why do you want me to tell you then?"
I groan.
Me: "Because I need you to tell me for my codex entry."
Ash Warrior Leader: "For your what??"
Me: "All right... I'm a bard, you know, and we bards, we have something like a little... competition going. You know how bards are, don't you?"
Ash Warrior Leader: "What type of competition?"
Me: "One that doesn't involve weapons. You see, we need all types of people to tell us the most amazing stories."
Ash Warrior Leader: "And?"
Me: "And the bard who gathers most unique stories wins, of course!"
Ash Warrior Leader: "And what is the prize?"
Me: "Eh... the prize? We're not doing it for... money, you know. It's more like an... honorary... thing..."
He raises an eyebrow.
Me: "Ah, to be honest, the winner gets to bed the bard he ever wanted to bed, be it male or female and the other bard is not allowed to refuse. Are you happy now?"
Ash Warrior Leader: "Is that what bards do if you're amongst other bards?"
Me: "What did you think we would do?"
Ash Warrior Leader: "Exchange songs and stories? For example..."
Me: "That too, but actually it's all about sex, you know... What is now. Do you tell me the story or not?"
Ash Warrior Leader: "Why should I? There's nothing in it for me. And you already know the story."
Me: "But you spread the glory of the Ash Warriors! Is that nothing? The thing is, someone told me the story before our contest started and we agreed that those stories don't count. But I do know for a fact, that none of the others know it."
He sighs and finally tells me the story of Luthias the Dwarfson again.
Ash Warrior Leader: "Are you going to finally leave me alone now?" he asks after he finishes his story.
Me: "Of course. And thank you very much. Oh and do me a favour. If other bards come by, don't tell them you know about our little secret, please. And don't let them know you can tell that story."
He grunts.
I turn around and run through the camp towards Alistair.



EDIT: I can't believe all of this fit into ONE post. Is there a maximum? How big is it? Did anyone encounter the limits yet?
EDIT EDIT: ah sorry... I've just read it again and there are some format problems especially in the first part of it. Just ignore it. Too tired now to correct that... *sigh*

Modifié par Asante81, 12 décembre 2009 - 03:51 .

[Loki330]

Kaldir II wrote...

Loki330 wrote...

but I've had 36 hours sleep in 5 days so I'm entitled to ramble like a drunken bum.

Hmmm, just over 7 hours sleep a day? Happy rambling

Anyway, very funny read this thread; good to see it's still going after 20+ pages. Keep it coming.

Miscalculation on my part then-it's been more like 4 or 3 a night this past week or say. Yay for deadlines.

[Sable Phoenix]

This thread is utterly hilarious.

[Xandurpein]

This is a pice of conversation in the game I heard yesterday. My apologies if I didn't manage to write it down word for word. It toally cracked me up:



Oghren: So... you and the Grey Warden. *chuckle*

Morrigan: I hope you are not referring to Alistair.

Oghren: Alistair, is he even interested in women?

Morrigan: I belive the subject is still open for debate.

Oghren: but... you and the Grey Warden...

Morrigan: Is there actually a question there or are you just going to leer and drool?

Oghren: I'll stick to the classics, leer and drool *chuckle*

[Xandurpein]

Shady314 wrote...

Xandurpein wrote...
Morrigan: Why do you think I fell for you in the first place? I respected you for your determination. You forged your own destiny and triumphed against all odds.
Morrigan: And I'll miss you. Missing you will be so much better than loosing my respect for you, because you won't let go.

? Try again.

Fair point I guess, even if slightly out of context. The point is that she is equally determined to do what she must do, and if you won't quit, you can't expect her to quit either. I'll think about it and maybe fix it so my point come across a little better.

Modifié par Xandurpein, 12 décembre 2009 - 11:56 .

[Xandurpein]

Xandurpein wrote...

Shady314 wrote...

Xandurpein wrote...
Morrigan: Why do you think I fell for you in the first place? I respected you for your determination. You forged your own destiny and triumphed against all odds.
Morrigan: And I'll miss you. Missing you will be so much better than loosing my respect for you, because you won't let go.

? Try again.

Fair point I guess, even if slightly out of context. The point is that she is equally determined to do what she must do, and if you won't quit, you can't expect her to quit either. I'll think about it and maybe fix it so my point come across a little better.

OK. Just updated it a bit. I hope this new version gets my point across a little better.

[Recidiva]

Asante81 wrote...

EDIT: I can't believe all of this fit into ONE post. Is there a maximum? How big is it? Did anyone encounter the limits yet?
EDIT EDIT: ah sorry... I've just read it again and there are some format problems especially in the first part of it. Just ignore it. Too tired now to correct that... *sigh*

Yay!  That was fun!

Had to crack up on the Zev and Lel part.  I swear I have to shield my eyes and ears and ****** him off immediately, which I did this game, in order to get to other people and not imprint immediately on Alistair like a Mabari.

I admit to pining.

Modifié par Recidiva, 12 décembre 2009 - 12:16 .

[Recidiva]

Sable Phoenix wrote...

This thread is utterly hilarious.

*happy dance*

[Recidiva]

*at Castle Redcliffe*



Me: Alistair? What the hell? What are you doing here? I left you at camp?

Alistair: Did you? I was sure you brought me along.

Me: NO! I've ALWAYS left you at camp.

Alistair: Well, how did I get here?

Me: I have no idea. Here I am hoping to have a conversation about the crown with Arl Eamon after the ashes and you're standing there arguing as usual. That's WHY I didn't BRING you. You showed up JUST to interrupt my strategy session with your inability to comprehend...strategy.

Alistair: I could have sworn...

Me: No. I am now swearing. Not your turn.

Alistair: Well, I'm here now.

Me: Whose game is this anyway?

Alistair: ...mine?

Me: This sucks.

Alistair: Don't you have something else to say to me?

Me: I'm NOT telling you that you look handsome.

Alistair: *crestfallen* Not even a little? *holds up two fingers slightly apart*

Me: *crushes fingers between plate-clad fingers*

Alistair: Ow. Mean. *shakes his hand* Look, I'm sorry I'm here. I didn't know it would cause a fuss.

Me: Fine. Let's just go. And stay in CAMP.

Alistair: That's weird. I can't move.

Me: What?

Alistair: I'm stuck. Right here by Arl Eamon.

Me: If I nail your feet to the floor, will you stay here?

Alistair: I have no idea. Do me a favor and nail through the boots, not the - wait. I'm not wearing boots. Or a weapon. Or gauntlets.

Me: That's called planning ahead.

Alistair: I do have templar armor.

Me: You're the only templar.

Alistair: It's a lot colder in here than I thought.

Me: *stalks out* My game.

Alistair: Could someone...bring me lunch?

[Xandurpein]

Recidiva wrote...

*at Castle Redcliffe*

Me: Alistair? What the hell? What are you doing here? I left you at camp?
etc...

Priceless! 

[Asante81]

Recidiva wrote...

Asante81 wrote...

EDIT: I can't believe all of this fit into ONE post. Is there a maximum? How big is it? Did anyone encounter the limits yet?
EDIT EDIT: ah sorry... I've just read it again and there are some format problems especially in the first part of it. Just ignore it. Too tired now to correct that... *sigh*

Yay!  That was fun!

Had to crack up on the Zev and Lel part.  I swear I have to shield my eyes and ears and ****** him off immediately, which I did this game, in order to get to other people and not imprint immediately on Alistair like a Mabari.

I admit to pining.

*laughs*
Yes... I always decide that too.. and fall for his charm again...
I wish there was the option of:

*putting fingers in her ears before approaching Alistair and the mage*
Me: "Lalala... Hello Alistair, don't answer, wanted to tell you: You're a stupid whiny ******, don't ever... I repeat EVER try to flirt with me or I'll make Zev sneak into your tent at night doing things with you you definitely won't enjoy at all... now, let's keep talking to a minimum and go to Duncan."
*pushes Alistair down the ramp*

[Recidiva]

Asante81 wrote...

*laughs*
Yes... I always decide that too.. and fall for his charm again...
I wish there was the option of:

*putting fingers in her ears before approaching Alistair and the mage*
Me: "Lalala... Hello Alistair, don't answer, wanted to tell you: You're a stupid whiny ******, don't ever... I repeat EVER try to flirt with me or I'll make Zev sneak into your tent at night doing things with you you definitely won't enjoy at all... now, let's keep talking to a minimum and go to Duncan."
*pushes Alistair down the ramp*

It is tough.  And even in this "pragmatic" playthrough it's difficult, because I still want Alistair to be king.  Which means I HAVE to get his approval up to do the hardening quest, and then I have to boost it higher to get the confirmation conversation where he says he's going to look out for himself more, and then I need to be able to persuade him to marry Anora and have a hardened king who isn't a drunken loser.  That means I have to get him to 80 or so approval for Ferelden's sake, and he's busy thanking me for it.  He gets nicer as the game goes on and it's difficult for my character to not at least have a lot of sympathy for the poor guy who is being used as a pawn.   I get more twinges of compassion as things progress.

I'm still going to do it, have him marry Anora and recruit Loghain, but he's just the one character you cannot avoid colliding with for most of the game until Landsmeet, and he makes a good case for himself.  Almost every other character can be completely ignored and it won't really affect the fate of Ferelden.

Unless you play your game just to spite Alistair, again, it still ends up being about Alistair.  Frustrating.  There's really no getting around that he's an excellent tank and good company unless you screw up his spec and pick cruel conversation options on purpose.

I really do think you should be able to take the crown for yourself.  The work it takes to make Alistair worthy and the fact that Anora is just...ew....makes me feel I'm failing the country.  But they're not really doing much for me, really, not much love lost.

Modifié par Recidiva, 12 décembre 2009 - 04:39 .

[Servant of Nature]

*at camp*



Alistair: Who's the elf? Nobody tells me anything. You leave me alone with Morrigan, all day!

Me: My new boytoy. Shush and go cook dinner.

Alistair: What? You're serious? You can't be serious.

Me: He tried to kill me, he couldn't, I figure that's a good sign for our budding relationship. Or budding mutual lust. *grins at Zev*

Alistair: But... I said you were pretty!

Me: STOP SAYING THAT! I thought you only said that if I was in a romance with you! Stop it! I am not going to tell you you're handsome. I don't care that you haven't licked any lampposts, I am trying to avoid contact with your voice. Now shut up and make dinner.

Alistair: *sadface*

Me: NO. DINNER.

Alistair: *kicks dirt and shuffles over to the campfire*

Me: *saunters over to Zev* So. Zevran.

Zevran: *arches eyebrow* Mmm? Need something from your new 'boytoy', do you?

Me: Oh, good! You overheard. Can I skip all this gift giving then?

Zev: Hmm. That would make me look so very easy, though. I do have standards.

Me: Did everyone you slept with have to give you leather first? C'mon. I have things to do, you're on the list, let's get this done.

Zev: Tsk. *grins* Ask me later. I am offended that you think I would just jump into your bedroll. We've known each other all of five minutes.

Me: *stomps off grumbling* Bloody Antivans.

[Recidiva]

Servant of Nature wrote...

Me: STOP SAYING THAT! I thought you only said that if I was in a romance with you! Stop it! I am not going to tell you you're handsome. I don't care that you haven't licked any lampposts, I am trying to avoid contact with your voice. Now shut up and make dinner.

THIS!

*at camp*

Me:  Okay, you're handsome.
Alistair:  I am?
Me:  Yes.  I'm curious what happens if I initiate romance when you're approval is really really high, I've never managed to wait that long.
Alistair:  That's...that's wonderful!  Here's a rose and here's a compliment, and here's a funny story and look, I'm smiling! 
Me:  Yaaaaay!  Okay.  now I'm resetting.
Alistair:  What?
Me:  I'm sorry.  I shouldn't use you this way.  But I do.  I'm a bad person.
Alistair:  I kinda like that part.
Me:  But...I...have to reset...
Alistair:  Just one more story?
Me:  *whimper*

[Servant of Nature]

In more depressing news, I wrote another part to my fanfic social.bioware.com/348/blog/1341/.

I am going to go play now and hope silly banters make me giggle.

[Recidiva]

Servant of Nature wrote...

In more depressing news, I wrote another part to my fanfic social.bioware.com/348/blog/1341/.

I am going to go play now and hope silly banters make me giggle.

Awww...good writing.

And the banter helps.  I'm supporting Bhelen this time because...*sigh* He's the best for Orzammar's future as far as my character knows.

And as I pass by Harrowmont's herald I hear "Rumors of Gray Warden devil worship...."

Yaaaay!  Man, I hate this city.