410 réponses à ce sujet

[DemonRisingSun]

Half hour bump

[DemonRisingSun]

 Reece DeCaux said here: 

http://www.holdtheli...ge-2#post-13156 


"i love the fact that you at least not only listen to feed back but ACT on feedback."

[DemonRisingSun]

 Keepin it fresh with a little dose of  *Space Magic

[DemonRisingSun]

6 hours, wow bump

[DemonRisingSun]

 AshApril 5, 2012 at 5:02 AM   editWow. Since finishing the game I was pretty upset with how everything unfolded, and haven’t really been interested in touching anything ME3-related. Your femShep/Kaidan romance ending kind of made my whole ME3 experience better now. But it’s more than that, too. It reads like how BioWare *would* have done it five years ago. It’s great, it offers closure and a happy ending that you have to bust your balls to get, emphasis on Shepard’s sacrifice. I mean it’s really, really good.
So thank you for writing them. I would have really liked to see the game on this note, so here’s to hoping that it will (or something similar, at least).
And if not… well, I’ve got it bookmarked. Thanks again!

http://collegeage.wo.../soldier-class/ 

[RedMike512]

The infiltrator one was great. Could use a little more punctuation, but still great. This should have been the ending.

[DemonRisingSun]

RedMike512 wrote...

The infiltrator one was great. Could use a little more punctuation, but still great. This should have been the ending.

Second Drafts are not out of the question. It's only a matter of time.

[DemonRisingSun]

1 hour bump.

[futeki]

Okay, I'm not trying to be a dick, and I hated the endings just as much as everyone else, but your dialogue is horrible. The story concept is fine, but most of these lines are cringeworthy. If Garrus cautions my Femshep to be careful one more time, she'd punch him in the face. For most of these characters, the dialogue is what made them so awesome. Good effort, just reread your lines and see if you can actually envision the characters saying them.

[DemonRisingSun]

futeki wrote...

Okay, I'm not trying to be a dick, and I hated the endings just as much as everyone else, but your dialogue is horrible. The story concept is fine, but most of these lines are cringeworthy. If Garrus cautions my Femshep to be careful one more time, she'd punch him in the face. For most of these characters, the dialogue is what made them so awesome. Good effort, just reread your lines and see if you can actually envision the characters saying them.

The vast majority of visitors didn't have the problems you had with the dialogue. A lot of people praised it. So keep that in mind for a moment while I respectfully disect your criticism. 

"See if you can envision the characters saying them."

I can, and I do and I read it aloud about a hundred times. A lot of people agree that although there's corny bits here and there (a lot of people like those parts too) that it reads like the characters would say it. 

BUT for the sake of arguement lets consider that I went overboard with Garrus telling Femshep to be careful. And INSTEAD of Femshep calmly reassuring Garrus that everything will be ok, she rather berates his show of emotion with a hard ass line like so, "Garrus you tell me to be careful one more time and I'll punch you in the face."

Garrus - "Sorry Shepard. I know you're the best. You're right I worry too much."

Would that make you happy? Or would hearing the Actors voice out the words suddenly make the lines a whole lot more believable for you? Cause it's possible that Your Shepard is different from how the mainstream audience sees theirs. I'm just saying that it's impossible to please everyone. But that doesn't stop me from trying. 

Make your arguments convincing enough and I'll see what I can do.

[DemonRisingSun]

 
Yesterday's updates in a full bulletin:

1. Added Music to the site, and on every Story Ending page.

http://collegeage.wo...t-music-page-2/

2. Changed the Front Page layout to be more informative.

http://collegeage.wordpress.com/

3. Rewrote Miranda Lawson's Romance Ep.

http://collegeage.wo...mance-epilogue/

4. Wrote a letter to Jennifer Hale.

http://collegeage.wo...nifer-hale-6-2/

5. The site over Doubled its all time views in 1 day. With 6,337 visits yesterday.

[DemonRisingSun]

20 min bump.

[DemonRisingSun]

40 min bump.

[Skyblade012]

DemonRisingSun wrote...

Skyblade012 wrote...

Very nicely well written.

Only real disappointment is in the portrayal of the Infiltrator as a close-quarters specialist, instead of a Sniper specialist, which is how I play it.

There weren't any open set oportunities to showcase the sniper training other than the Brute Garrus beats Shep to the shot.

How about just having a Renegade Interrupt where the Illusive Man's head explodes in the middle of his speech from a perfectly aimed shot from an Infiltrator who is not going to reveal her perfect sniping position?

[DemonRisingSun]

Skyblade012 wrote...

DemonRisingSun wrote...

Skyblade012 wrote...

Very nicely well written.

Only real disappointment is in the portrayal of the Infiltrator as a close-quarters specialist, instead of a Sniper specialist, which is how I play it.

There weren't any open set oportunities to showcase the sniper training other than the Brute Garrus beats Shep to the shot.

How about just having a Renegade Interrupt where the Illusive Man's head explodes in the middle of his speech from a perfectly aimed shot from an Infiltrator who is not going to reveal her perfect sniping position?

You may be on to something. I'll keep it in my notes for Draft #2

[Jazharah]

Nice work there!

I can't say I find these endings so far 'better' - but it sure is nice to see an alternative to what we have now.

[DemonRisingSun]

40 min bump. Yeah, most people are more enthusiastic about the Alt endings than you are but I know it needs work and future drafts. Just a matter of time.

[DemonRisingSun]

  Space  Magic.

[DemonRisingSun]

1 hour bump

[DemonRisingSun]

Wow. Ha this is something.

[DemonRisingSun]

40 min bump

[DemonRisingSun]

40 min bump, awwe what's going on? Where are all the people?

[DemonRisingSun]

1 hour bump. guess it's a slow day.

[Jazharah]

15 bumps on 1 page? Sheesh man. People will respond if they find it worth responding.

[DemonRisingSun]

Jazharah wrote...

15 bumps on 1 page? Sheesh man. People will respond if they find it worth responding.

Still got 674 referrals yesterday from this page. And people have asked me to keep bumping this so they can still find it (after work and the like.) So Sheesh man.