9962 réponses à ce sujet

[JadeDragonMTR]

hot_heart wrote...

JadeDragonMTR wrote...
Thanks for the link! Will check that out. Very useful!

You're welcome.

You could play with a few possibilities, depending on who features in your story or what angles you take. Obviously, Jack serves as an example of the horrors that Cerberus can lead to, but the 'end result' is impressive to some extent.

And you're probably aware of this, but I shall link it anyway...because it's gooood.

Icyflare wrote...
Age makes you posher. Got it. Thanks =P

You don't think the Queen started out sounding like that, do you?
Looking at some clips though, yeah, she sounds almost upper-class whereas Traynor just speaks properly (a London accent can vary quite significantly).

Also read your Miranda story. It's very interesting to see Erin back for another operation with Miranda. Very interesting indeed. I always thought that in ME3 they should have had a battle scene between Kai Leng and Miranda. Of course we want Shepard to kill Leng, but there are some issues between him and Miranda that needs to be duked out! It would have been a nice touch though.

[kann.nix9mm]

JadeDragonMTR wrote...

Also read your Miranda story. It's very interesting to see Erin back for another operation with Miranda. Very interesting indeed. I always thought that in ME3 they should have had a battle scene between Kai Leng and Miranda. Of course we want Shepard to kill Leng, but there are some issues between him and Miranda that needs to be duked out! It would have been a nice touch though.

If I'm not mistaken they have a batlle scene between Leng and Miranda ... ok Miranda dies but they have one ^^

[hot_heart]

JadeDragonMTR wrote...
Also read your Miranda story. It's very interesting to see Erin back for another operation with Miranda. Very interesting indeed. I always thought that in ME3 they should have had a battle scene between Kai Leng and Miranda. Of course we want Shepard to kill Leng, but there are some issues between him and Miranda that needs to be duked out! It would have been a nice touch though.

Oh, thank you very much for reading. Yeah, I figured it would be odd to have her for just one chapter so I increased her role a little. Was trying to be economic with the characters actually, so a few are reappearing where they may not have before. Juggling all the parts was causing me some grief, but I do have some surprises up my sleeve...

And, yeah, it would've been good to see. I'm not even sure of their history, to be honest. Surely,  if she'd known about the Grayson stuff, she would've left much earlier. Of course, very soon I shall be writing that and the aftermath. I don't want to rush through to it...but I kinda do.

kann.nix9mm wrote...
If I'm not mistaken they have a batlle scene between Leng and Miranda ... ok Miranda dies but they have one ^^

Hey, she doesn't always die.
Unfortunately, you don't get to see a fight either way. Though, given how Thane's played out, maybe that's a good thing.

Modifié par hot_heart, 25 juillet 2012 - 11:07 .

[JadeDragonMTR]

kann.nix9mm wrote...

JadeDragonMTR wrote...

Also read your Miranda story. It's very interesting to see Erin back for another operation with Miranda. Very interesting indeed. I always thought that in ME3 they should have had a battle scene between Kai Leng and Miranda. Of course we want Shepard to kill Leng, but there are some issues between him and Miranda that needs to be duked out! It would have been a nice touch though.

If I'm not mistaken they have a batlle scene between Leng and Miranda ... ok Miranda dies but they have one ^^

Yes, it was a very quick scene. Leng wounds Miranda when trying to get off Sanctuary; and Miranda doesn't have to die.  I meant, ilke a real fight in a sequence where two Ceberus/ex-Ceberus top bred operatives fight out, because Miranda doesn't have any fighting scenes, other than throwing her father out of the window, and she deserves a real fight. lol. Even Zaeed had a better fight in ME3. 

[JadeDragonMTR]

hot_heart wrote...

JadeDragonMTR wrote...
Also read your Miranda story. It's very interesting to see Erin back for another operation with Miranda. Very interesting indeed. I always thought that in ME3 they should have had a battle scene between Kai Leng and Miranda. Of course we want Shepard to kill Leng, but there are some issues between him and Miranda that needs to be duked out! It would have been a nice touch though.

Oh, thank you very much for reading. Yeah, I figured it would be odd to have her for just one chapter so I increased her role a little. Was trying to be economic with the characters actually, so a few are reappearing where they may not have before. Juggling all the parts was causing me some grief, but I do have some surprises up my sleeve...

And, yeah, it would've been good to see. I'm not even sure of their history, to be honest. Surely,  if she'd known about the Grayson stuff, she would've left much earlier. Of course, very soon I shall be writing that and the aftermath. I don't want to rush through to it...but I kinda do.

kann.nix9mm wrote...
If I'm not mistaken they have a batlle scene between Leng and Miranda ... ok Miranda dies but they have one ^^

Hey, she doesn't always die.
Unfortunately, you don't get to see a fight either way. Though, given how Thane's played out, maybe that's a good thing.

You mean you will write about Miranda's reaction to what happened in Retribution and Deception or? Can't wait to see that!

[Seracen]

hot_heart wrote...

Writing a romance scene from the opposite gender's perspective, no matter how brief, is certainly uncomfortable. Why did I do this?

Because ART!!!!   ART!!!!!

Also, I think a small dose of masochism is healthy for any writer, otherwise we'd never get anything done.  Think of how much work it takes to sit down and create vs. being spoon fed a story.

Also, excercises such as this will assuredly improve your writing in other instances!

[Seracen]

Blargh...I can't believe how many SLOW chapter's I'm having to write before the action starts! Not that I don't like the story...I just ended up splitting my "starting action" chapter into two, just to break up the slower paced buildup.

I almost feel like ME1, where the Eden Prime mission was followed by the Citadel Missions, which was jarring for a lot of folks who weren't used to the slower pacing (I LOVED it, of course).

Debating whether I want to pepper other plot progressions in between these chapters, just to set them up early, and to offer a respite from the talking and politics that necessarily MUST be set up. This IS post ME3, after all.

I dunno, what you y'all think is a good balance between development, slow story, and action? My fave parts always stem from character development.

Also, I feel that we NEEDED that hour or so of slow Citadel stuff in ME1, just to warm up to the characters we would grow to love over the course of the trilogy...

Modifié par Seracen, 26 juillet 2012 - 05:20 .

[Drussius]

^ I know how you feel. That's why I originally decided to cut in bits of action in the "current" scene amidst the slower character development stuff to help pick up the pace a little in my story. If I wasn't cutting back and forth, I think the first five or six chapters would have been composed almost entirely of slower background stuff.

Plus, doing it the way I am, I can explore some of the mundane parts in greater detail without feeling like I'm dragging things out. With OC especially, I think it's important to let readers get a better sense of the characters.

Personally, I am perfectly happy with character-driven dramas... a story doesn't have to have any action at all for me to love it if it captures my attention in some other way. But considering my story centers around the Reaper assault on Terra Nova, bringing some of the action into earlier chapters was necessary.

I guess you just need to figure out where you want the balance of your story to lie.

[LanceSolous13]

I've had a freaking amazing day today!

Got my class list for the new year, BEST MONDAYS EVAR! English first period of the day and the last period is Study Hall so I can leave early AND my hardest class is on the other days of the week! WOOT!

Also, I went to the Chris Colfer Book Signing in San Francisco today and he was so awesome and I have three signed copies of his book and it was just epic and WHEEE! THE SOUND I'M MAKING ISN'T HUMAN!

Anyways, my point is that I'm in a really good mood so I should write right now.

[lillitheris]

JadeDragonMTR wrote...

Yes, it was a very quick scene. Leng wounds Miranda when trying to get off Sanctuary; and Miranda doesn't have to die.  I meant, ilke a real fight in a sequence where two Ceberus/ex-Ceberus top bred operatives fight out, because Miranda doesn't have any fighting scenes, other than throwing her father out of the window, and she deserves a real fight. lol. Even Zaeed had a better fight in ME3. 

This is how that scene would go:

[lillitheris]

I’m slightly concerned about getting to action at some point…I’ve been pondering about introducing some interludes of less-important fights (like certain someones defending against the incursion by certain other ones) to ‘practice’.

But, yeah, I’m about 90 k words in and nothing’s happened thus far Seems to be working well enough.

*Scripts away the stupid MP advert from taking space at the top*

[Drussius]

lillitheris wrote...

JadeDragonMTR wrote...

Yes, it was a very quick scene. Leng wounds Miranda when trying to get off Sanctuary; and Miranda doesn't have to die.  I meant, ilke a real fight in a sequence where two Ceberus/ex-Ceberus top bred operatives fight out, because Miranda doesn't have any fighting scenes, other than throwing her father out of the window, and she deserves a real fight. lol. Even Zaeed had a better fight in ME3. 

This is how that scene would go:

^ Except for the part where Kai Leng has impenetrable Plot Armor. Unless you were thinking the Swordsman was Miranda...

[Drussius]

lillitheris wrote...

*Scripts away the stupid MP advert from taking space at the top*

I miss Multiplayer.

[hot_heart]

JadeDragonMTR wrote...
You mean you will write about Miranda's reaction to what happened in Retribution and Deception or? Can't wait to see that!

Well, I haven't read the books, so I don't know all the details but there is a lot of stuff at Sanctuary and it all ties into the Reaper tech/implants/Phoenix Project stuff. She might have known who Kai Leng was, just not what he was up to more recently.

Plus, there will be a huge fight scene and a confrontation with her father.

Seracen wrote...
Because ART!!!!   ART!!!!!

Also, I think a small dose of masochism is healthy for any writer, otherwise we'd never get anything done.  Think of how much work it takes to sit down and create vs. being spoon fed a story.

Also, excercises such as this will assuredly improve your writing in other instances!

True. I don't really have much practice with the romantic stuff so it may fall flat. But I do know that sentences like 'my body aches for...' may be a little cheesy.

Seracen wrote...
Blargh...I can't believe how many SLOW chapter's I'm having to write before the action starts!

I know that feel. I can tell my latest chapter did nothing for anyone...but it needed to be there. The plan shall become clear soon enough.

Modifié par hot_heart, 26 juillet 2012 - 09:06 .

[LanceSolous13]

hot_heart wrote...

Seracen wrote...
Blargh...I can't believe how many SLOW chapter's I'm having to write before the action starts!

I know that feel. I can tell my latest chapter did nothing for anyone...but it needed to be there. The plan shall become clear soon enough.

Ditto. Reason I'm having such a hard time with my current chapter is because its the Citadel Coup from Kaidan's POV so a bit of its copy and pasta and other parts are more some foreshadowing.

[fluffywalrus]

hot_heart wrote...

Seracen wrote...
Because ART!!!!   ART!!!!!

Also, I think a small dose of masochism is healthy for any writer, otherwise we'd never get anything done.  Think of how much work it takes to sit down and create vs. being spoon fed a story.

Also, excercises such as this will assuredly improve your writing in other instances!

True. I don't really have much practice with the romantic stuff so it may fall flat. But I do know that sentences like 'my body aches for...' may be a little cheesy.

I would say to keep the romantic parts simple if you don't really have much practice with it.  Writing for the opposite sex isn't all too difficult. In general, men and women are remarkably similar, and it's their individual personalities that set them apart. Think of it more as people than man/woman, it might help, maybe?

But yeah, romance is cheesy at the best AND worst of times, so it's all in how you frame it. I find that building intimacy over time with small touches, hands accidentally grazing against each other, the characters unexpectedly finding themselves a little closer than most would consider appropriate, etc. Byt the time you actually get to the romantic bits (if the readers bought into the building of intimacy, at least), the cheesy lines will be forgiven due to the readers being happy that the characters have found release. Or at least, I find that little formula works well. Works for me.

Seracen wrote...
Blargh...I can't believe how many SLOW chapter's I'm having to write before the action starts!

Hah, yeah. I've been struggling with some form of that for a bit now. Luckily, I've got SOME action bits coming up, but not the ones I desperately want to write about (I really want to get to the ME timeline stuff). I understand the frustration, though. It's...agonizing at times, and distracting.

lillitheris wrote...

I’m slightly concerned about getting
to action at some point…I’ve been pondering about introducing some
interludes of less-important fights (like certain someones defending
against the incursion by certain other ones) to ‘practice’.

I'd say that if you feel you need practice, then by all means practice. Otherwise, you'll have action scenes like I have in the early chapters of my story (which I feel are rather weakly written due to my inexperience).
Interludes could work well...it would keep the sections brief, allowing you to get the hang of the process. That would probably be a great idea

[Obsidian Gryphon]

Question - is there a way to edit the chapter labels in doc manager for FFN? I made my labels too long *smacks head*.

[lillitheris]

Obsidian Gryphon wrote...

Question - is there a way to edit the chapter labels in doc manager for FFN? I made my labels too long *smacks head*.

Don’t think so, you’d need to remove and reupload.

[kann.nix9mm]

Sadly not. You have to remove and upload it again ...

What I hate about the DocManager is if you use numbers for your chapters and you have more then 10 chapters it goes lik this

Ch 1
Ch 10
Ch 11
Ch 12
Ch 2
Ch 3
Ch 4
.
.
Ch 9

[lillitheris]

^ That (and over two decades of using computers) is why I always label mine 001 and so on. I figured that in this case limiting it to 999 chapters is a perfectly sensible tradeoff.

[Obsidian Gryphon]

^^ Ok, so I'll delete and upload again.   *sigh*

[Obsidian Gryphon]

Edit, sry dbl post. Forum is slow.

Modifié par Obsidian Gryphon, 26 juillet 2012 - 11:36 .

[hot_heart]

fluffywalrus wrote...
I would say to keep the romantic parts simple if you don't really have much practice with it.  Writing for the opposite sex isn't all too difficult. In general, men and women are remarkably similar, and it's their individual personalities that set them apart. Think of it more as people than man/woman, it might help, maybe?

But yeah, romance is cheesy at the best AND worst of times, so it's all in how you frame it. I find that building intimacy over time with small touches, hands accidentally grazing against each other, the characters unexpectedly finding themselves a little closer than most would consider appropriate, etc. Byt the time you actually get to the romantic bits (if the readers bought into the building of intimacy, at least), the cheesy lines will be forgiven due to the readers being happy that the characters have found release. Or at least, I find that little formula works well. Works for me.

Thanks for the tips. Fortunately (and unfortunately), it's the Shepard/Miranda scene in the game so it's only brief and fairly well written. I'm just adding to it. The biggest issue is that sudden shift from requesting access to Alliance resources, pouring her heart out and then Shepard's 'come hither' look.

It's just a bit funny describing what attracts her to Shepard when you usually play as him.

[lillitheris]

Of course I ended up polishing that bit of dialogue I mentioned earlier… was going to try to finish the chapter today, but it’ll have to be tomorrow, I guess! Better this way, I suppose.

[Icyflare]

Slow week for stories. I'll assume it's the summer vacations.