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#4301
Icyflare

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YurigirlzCrush wrote...

I don't remember seeing anyone with glasses either. and they do mention routine gene therapy in utero in one of the games i think. but I was visualizing a character in my head and for some reason thought of her wearing glasses. made me wonder if anyone actually would if gene therapy is routine.

Perhaps, it could be a fashion thing, or maybe gene therapy is still relatively expensive so poor eyesight could an indirect  social indicator of wealth? Just tossing ideas out there.

Modifié par Icyflare, 23 août 2012 - 02:56 .


#4302
fainmaca

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MacNasty wrote...

 Sorry about all the questions in relation to Quarians, but there's a lot to ask :D. Just an awkard part I'm having a little trouble getting around. When you mention a Quarian do you usually do the full name (like Tal'Zorah) or the first (Tali) or the last (Reegar). I've heard all three across the games, and I was wondering about that. It just seems to me to fit better for Quarians with one syllable first names to go by their last names, while those with two go by their first. Maybe it's just me :pinched:


Hmm. I think you need to think about the character behind the name. Think about Kal'Reegar. He's a soldier, and they do tend to label one another with surnames or nicknames rather than simple first names. Whereas Tali is more your civilian type (granted with combat training, but still a civvie), and therefore would use the first name more. as for the Admirals, they're always the full Daro'Xen or Han'Gerrel, more formal to reflect the status they have as dignitaries/officials.

Also, are any of your characters related? You'll need to use first names to differentiate between them (i.e you couldn't refer to Tali's father as Zorah, because she's a Zorah, too, and it would get confusing). But if there's just one with that clan name, you could feel safe referring to them by that.

#4303
lillitheris

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MacNasty wrote...

 Sorry about all the questions in relation to Quarians, but there's a lot to ask :D. Just an awkard part I'm having a little trouble getting around. When you mention a Quarian do you usually do the full name (like Tal'Zorah) or the first (Tali) or the last (Reegar). I've heard all three across the games, and I was wondering about that. It just seems to me to fit better for Quarians with one syllable first names to go by their last names, while those with two go by their first. Maybe it's just me :pinched:


I’d mostly go with similar ‘rules’ to human first and last names. The combined name is used in place of just the last name occasionally. Quarians do not seem particularly protective of their first names, so it’s not particularly odd to refer to friends that way.

In POVs, you will almost always want to use the first name, I think, just as with humans. There has to have a really strong identification with the last name (like Shepard does) to use it in POVs.

(And even then, Eevy ‘regresses’ to her given name in dreams, melding, and so on. That’s her true identity. Shepard is only used consciously.)

#4304
YurigirlzCrush

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Icyflare wrote...

YurigirlzCrush wrote...

I don't remember seeing anyone with glasses either. and they do mention routine gene therapy in utero in one of the games i think. but I was visualizing a character in my head and for some reason thought of her wearing glasses. made me wonder if anyone actually would if gene therapy is routine.

Perhaps, it could be a fashion thing, or maybe gene therapy is still relatively expensive so poor eyesight could an indirect  social indicator of wealth? Just tossing ideas out there.


both good points. i'm sort of committed to this image I have of this character, but i'm thinking it will be for a different reason that will have no risk of people pointing it out as anti lore. the idea just came to me this morning. *smiles* but thanks to everyone for your thoughts!

#4305
lillitheris

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hot_heart wrote...

As for your own story, I'm afraid I'm not too caught up on it but I could see how it might be a bit daunting, and too samey, to have a long series of reunions (another reason why BioWare probably avoided it) or some sort of 'reunion tour'. Is your Shepard getting right back into the action?


She’d definitely want to, but it’s not really possible right now for various reasons.

Probably want some other stuff going on. Maybe some tension and some "I wish we could have reunited under happier circumstances"-type sitiations. :P


Yeah, I think I will go this route, thanks! I mapped out a couple events that I can include at this point in the timeline. They’re not really actiony or super-important in their own right, but they should serve to break the pattern a little.

#4306
lillitheris

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YurigirlzCrush wrote...

Icyflare wrote...

YurigirlzCrush wrote...

I don't remember seeing anyone with glasses either. and they do mention routine gene therapy in utero in one of the games i think. but I was visualizing a character in my head and for some reason thought of her wearing glasses. made me wonder if anyone actually would if gene therapy is routine.

Perhaps, it could be a fashion thing, or maybe gene therapy is still relatively expensive so poor eyesight could an indirect  social indicator of wealth? Just tossing ideas out there.


both good points. i'm sort of committed to this image I have of this character, but i'm thinking it will be for a different reason that will have no risk of people pointing it out as anti lore. the idea just came to me this morning. *smiles* but thanks to everyone for your thoughts!


People wear glasses with non-corrective lenses even today ^_^ I do think, though, that vision is probably a solved problem as of ~2100 at the latest, so wearing glasses would probably come across more like wearing 17th century period clothing today than a fashion statement.

#4307
fainmaca

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I've got a friend heading into hospital next week to get the lenses in his eyes replaced (I'm no doctor, so I don't know exactly the ins and outs of it all). He's been wearing thick glasses since he was a kid, but the doctors reckon this will let him go about without needing specs. If we can do that kind of thing now, then I reckon it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to think that it'd become a common procedure by the time 150 years has gone past. Especially in a society where near-fatal wounds can be healed by smearing goo over them, lives are extended by almost half again, and hair can be miraculously restored to vibrant vitality like in the case of Udina.

But as Lill said, people can and probably will wear glasses just for the look of them.

#4308
hot_heart

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To add to the stuff about glasses. When I last worked with optometrists, the lasik/lasek surgery was never a permanent fix. If I recall correctly, it's to do with the eyes being naturally predisposed towards a certain curvature, even if that doesn't provide 20/20 vision (or better). So, eventually, after a couple of decades or so, the eyes would 'heal' and return to the old prescription.

Of course, gene therapy would be able to eradicate the problem at the root (I think it was mentioned with Ashley's background?) and I don't see it being too hard to imagine that laser eye surgery has improved enough so that the effect remains permanent.

Then, as mentioned, glasses could still be a fashion item. Depends how strongly you adhere to the fact that no other person wears them or just attribute it to shortcuts from the games' visual team. Makes me think they may have become an outdated fashion item, same as ones we don't wear today. I guess future people stick to visors. :P

#4309
Obsidian Gryphon

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Hmmm. Nvm. Posted Image

Modifié par Obsidian Gryphon, 23 août 2012 - 04:43 .


#4310
YurigirlzCrush

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I have to stop asking questions and then going to work. makes me look very unappreciative of everyone's input. but i'm glad of all the input. I was sort of thinking that between gene therapy and medical advances, glasses would be a thing of the past. but the image of the character that I have refuses to go away. so I was figuring that since she's tech savvy, it wasn't outside the realm of possibility to modify vision-enhancement tech like Garrus's visor so that it is a little more comfortable to wear and less obviously-tech, like into a form resembling glasses. something (un)fashionable and functional for the fashionista on the go. *smiles*

#4311
Drussius

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Hmm. I suddenly find myself in a bit of a quandary. As those who are reading my fic know, I have been jumping back and forth from scenes taking place at "present" to scenes from the weeks prior. However, I've reached a point where I have covered all the stuff for a certain character from prior weeks, but still have things that need to be covered in the current timeline. But there is still some stuff I need to get to from prior weeks for the rest of the cast.

So I find myself wondering if I should postpone the current stuff for the character in question until I tie up all the remaining scenes in the past for the rest of the characters, or if it wouldn't be too odd to include a "Now" scene without a flashback scene attached.

#4312
Spiritwolf1

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Either way it would be out of the norm, we either dont hear from the character or we dont hear history from the character, which is the lessor of the two evils. Taking the character out of the story might be tuff, but it's what you would feel comfortable with.

#4313
MacNasty

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Drussius wrote...

Hmm. I suddenly find myself in a bit of a quandary. As those who are reading my fic know, I have been jumping back and forth from scenes taking place at "present" to scenes from the weeks prior. However, I've reached a point where I have covered all the stuff for a certain character from prior weeks, but still have things that need to be covered in the current timeline. But there is still some stuff I need to get to from prior weeks for the rest of the cast.

So I find myself wondering if I should postpone the current stuff for the character in question until I tie up all the remaining scenes in the past for the rest of the characters, or if it wouldn't be too odd to include a "Now" scene without a flashback scene attached.


Personally, I'm still a bit behind on your fic (Well more than a bit :lol:). But it seems to me that it would seem a bit odd without a now scene without a scene from the past. you could add a scene the doesn't do much, but is a bit relevant.

#4314
Drussius

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Spiritwolf1 wrote...

Either way it would be out of the norm, we either dont hear from the character or we dont hear history from the character, which is the lessor of the two evils. Taking the character out of the story might be tuff, but it's what you would feel comfortable with.


You both hit the nail on the head in terms of understanding the problem. It feels out of place to have a current scene without a companion scene to go with it, at least until the timelines converge. I'm wracking my brain to come up with something to add in terms of a flashback scene like MacNasty suggested, because there's one more scene for the character that absolutely must be done in the current timeline. After I get that scene in, further developments can wait on that front for a few chapters.

It's just very likely that whatever scene I come up with, if I manage to think of something to add at all, will be filler that has little to nothing to do with the overall plot. It would be a scene added for the sole purpose of adding a scene. And somehow that bothers me.

#4315
MacNasty

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Drussius wrote...

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

Either way it would be out of the norm, we either dont hear from the character or we dont hear history from the character, which is the lessor of the two evils. Taking the character out of the story might be tuff, but it's what you would feel comfortable with.


You both hit the nail on the head in terms of understanding the problem. It feels out of place to have a current scene without a companion scene to go with it, at least until the timelines converge. I'm wracking my brain to come up with something to add in terms of a flashback scene like MacNasty suggested, because there's one more scene for the character that absolutely must be done in the current timeline. After I get that scene in, further developments can wait on that front for a few chapters.

It's just very likely that whatever scene I come up with, if I manage to think of something to add at all, will be filler that has little to nothing to do with the overall plot. It would be a scene added for the sole purpose of adding a scene. And somehow that bothers me.


I've not seen everything you've had, due to a series of procrastination events, none of the fanfics I've been reading have progressed very far, but maybe you could d something showing her speaking with other members of the crew? Talking about something personal to them that could show up and have something to do in the main plot? Maybe a fear, or a feeling or emotion or something that gets in the way? Just throwing out randoms things here, hope you don't mind my bad attempts at help:D. Also, on a side note, was re-reading your first chapter... I do enjoy how you explained what the choices of the Shepard in the universe of your story made. It was a real good piece of dialogue I think.

#4316
Drussius

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Well, thank you for the compliment. I wanted to include at least a little of my main Shepard's choices in the story's background info. Especially since some of it plays into certain elements about how humanity is viewed by other species.

Still not sure what to do regarding the extra scene. Your suggestions are good ones, but including the sorts of conversations you're talking about won't work with the particular character in question. I'll manage to come up with something relevant eventually, but it's the first real roadblock I've hit in the story. Most of the time, the subject of the scenes and what I want to accomplish in each section have come quickly, if not the writing itself.

#4317
lillitheris

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If you don’t have a good past-scene, I don’t think you should force it. I think you probably will come up with one (say, simply something that contrasts with the current events), but if not, it would be better to do without.

That would, I suppose, leave you either with postponing the present scene, or just including it without the past. The closer you are to convergence, the less out of place it will be to simply have it there without the past. Have you written it out that way? Is it really a huge problem in terms of reading flow?

You could also try to interleave it between any other scenes you may have, or doing the opposite of including more past: include more present. That is to say, it may be easier to come up with short present scenes for any other characters, and you can sandwich with those to emphasize the approaching convergence.

#4318
MrStoob

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Can't see anything specific about this, so:

What kind of combat experience does Miranda have? Is she an experienced and trained combatant or just become a combatant due to necessity?

#4319
hot_heart

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MrStoob wrote...
Can't see anything specific about this, so:

What kind of combat experience does Miranda have? Is she an experienced and trained combatant or just become a combatant due to necessity?

I'd say, after her two decades with Cerberus and 'undertaking some of their most dangerous missions', she has some kind of training. I get the impression that the ME2 squad were supposed to be 'exceptional' people, picked for the task, and she fills a sort of jack-of-all-trades (master of none) role. I don't think she was simply there by virtue of the Lazarus Project.

In terms of real experience prior to ME2, I'm not actually sure...

#4320
lillitheris

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She’s definitely had a lot of ad-hoc and militia-style training. Relative to professionals like Shepard, Kaidan/Ash, Garrus, Wrex…I don’t think she’s at the same level, but she can certainly hold her own—especially when in company of pros.

Normally, I’d expect a non-experienced combatant to suffer the most at the tactical level but contradicting that we have her success as the fire team leader—a firmly tactical position. This would imply that she’s had some hands-on experience leading teams.

Now, this of course has some implications on her career in Cerberus. The kinds of missions in which she’d gain that experience would probably be somewhat questionable in nature.

Modifié par lillitheris, 24 août 2012 - 09:44 .


#4321
hot_heart

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lillitheris wrote...
Now, this of course has some implications on her career in Cerberus. The kinds of missions in which she’d gain that experience would probably be somewhat questionable in nature.

No, she'd only kill mercs and batarians. ;)

#4322
Spiritwolf1

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Drussius wrote...

Well, thank you for the compliment. I wanted to include at least a little of my main Shepard's choices in the story's background info. Especially since some of it plays into certain elements about how humanity is viewed by other species.

Still not sure what to do regarding the extra scene. Your suggestions are good ones, but including the sorts of conversations you're talking about won't work with the particular character in question. I'll manage to come up with something relevant eventually, but it's the first real roadblock I've hit in the story. Most of the time, the subject of the scenes and what I want to accomplish in each section have come quickly, if not the writing itself.



Can you go back farther into something that defined er as a person before she met the crew, something that would explain why she (or he I guess butsince you have a lot of she's...) would react a way she does or thinks a certain way.

#4323
MrStoob

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So would it be fair to say Miranda has had extensive training, but not a great deal of direct combat experience beyond saboteur/espionage missions? I've set a scenario of conflict between Shep and Miranda, and this is one of their sticking points.

#4324
YurigirlzCrush

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not a miranda expert here. but she struck me as the james bond secret agent type. probably not a lot of major combat experience, but a fair amount of stealthy, cqc, infiltration and ambush type action. I think anyone who spent a ton of time on the battlefield would beat her with superior tactics because of experience, but she'd have the skillz to be an asset to any team of professionals.

#4325
Drussius

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lillitheris wrote...

If you don’t have a good past-scene, I don’t think you should force it. I think you probably will come up with one (say, simply something that contrasts with the current events), but if not, it would be better to do without.

That would, I suppose, leave you either with postponing the present scene, or just including it without the past. The closer you are to convergence, the less out of place it will be to simply have it there without the past. Have you written it out that way? Is it really a huge problem in terms of reading flow?

You could also try to interleave it between any other scenes you may have, or doing the opposite of including more past: include more present. That is to say, it may be easier to come up with short present scenes for any other characters, and you can sandwich with those to emphasize the approaching convergence.


I could do it that way, but I'm not sure. It may actually be better than going from a pairing of Now/Past, Now/Past to a shift straight to the final "Now" at the point of convergence. Or the reader may be so accustomed to the current way it's written, as I am to writing it, that they could miss the fact that there isn't a flashback scene. I have a feeling back-to-back "Now"s will be a little odd to see the first time. It certainly was to write it that way. The minute I did it, my brain said "Whoa, dude! Hold on! You left a section out!" Posted Image

And to spirit: Another good idea. But I actually asked a question similar to that situation before. The consensus seemed to be that going Now, Two weeks earlier, Now, Two weeks earlier, Now, Twenty Years Earlier, was a bit disruptive to the flow. I'm sure an idea will come to me eventually. It just may require another chapter-to-chapter content shift. I find myself thinking that my best shot is actually going to be to go back and replace Character X's last past scene with something that happened even earlier. That way the last scene I have written can still tie off the background for that character as it is.