9962 réponses à ce sujet

[hot_heart]

I would probably use what lilli touched on, and maybe mention that for that instance, it was better to keep the numbers down for parading around Omega. Or a reason why Zaeed was better for that sort of environment...or the fact that Miranda doesn't really like Omega.

[lillitheris]

Yep, that sounds quite reasonable.

[Cmdr. Ken Shepard]

Have had an idea floating in my head for awhile now. Wanted to see what ya'll thought.

Concept of doing a 1st person narrative type biography as Shepard. Describe childhood, Skillian blitz, and touch on things from the games but from more a "feelings" type thing rather than a rehash of what was done. Question is I don't know If I should go from the point of view as near the end of Shep's life, with the ability to discuss grandchildren and such, or more imminent after the end of the Reaper war and make it have a point to it, like attempting to teach a lesson.

Not sure how to do it...has anyone do something like this? My fanfic rough draft has taught me I need to discover a bit more about my Shepard, and that I suck at doing dialogue so this way I can discover Shep's past in depth and avoid the dialogue. LOL

[lillitheris]

Hm. If you go with the feeling aspect, I think it would work best either as it happens, or then ‘prompted’ in dialogue. Leastwise, I’m not sure how well it would work as a recounting…but that might just be the limitations of my imagination.

I might have something more sensible to say later, but I’m running late…

[lillitheris]

…Yay, back from the gym! But boo, it did not reset the brain…sometimes it helps. I’m supposed to be writing, and I even have the chapter outlined (inasmuch as I ever plan anything), but just not feeling it…

[lillitheris]

Cmdr. Ken Shepard wrote...

Question is I don't know If I should go from the point of view as near the end of Shep's life, with the ability to discuss grandchildren and such, or more imminent after the end of the Reaper war and make it have a point to it, like attempting to teach a lesson.

So, I think either of these would work…it’s up to you to decide which is better! You could try to guide the decision with concerns like trying to teach the lesson, although you’ll probably want to expand on why Shepard’s feelings and internal thoughts are at the subject of this, rather than the more practical (?) aspects.

 I do think that it would work better with someone prompting Shepard for the events and the feelings, but I think more info is needed to really say more…do you have a short scene or example in mind that you could relate so that I/we could see what you’re talking about?

Sounds interesting anyway!

[hot_heart]

If it's meant to be about discovering your Shepard and you want to practise dialogue, could go the old psych evaluation route?

Maybe someone's doing a documentary on him (not Allers)?

[IliyaMoroumetz]

lillitheris wrote...

…Yay, back from the gym! But boo, it did not reset the brain…sometimes it helps. I’m supposed to be writing, and I even have the chapter outlined (inasmuch as I ever plan anything), but just not feeling it…

Well, can't speak for anyone but myself, but I often find excersizing to be a big help.  I mean, once you get the blood flowing and the heart pumping, the post-workout endorphins help put things in perspective a bit.

[lillitheris]

Often works for me, too, but sometimes it seems to backfire…

[YurigirlzCrush]

I was hoping for a little creative help. there's this idea in my head for an asari food similar to chocolate, but made from a berry native to Thessia. the problem is that i'm terrible at naming fictional foods. could anyone help me with a name for this fictional berry-bar and-or the berry it's made from?

[hot_heart]

YurigirlzCrush wrote...
I was hoping for a little creative help. there's this idea in my head for an asari food similar to chocolate, but made from a berry native to Thessia. the problem is that i'm terrible at naming fictional foods. could anyone help me with a name for this fictional berry-bar and-or the berry it's made from?

Tupo berries!

[YurigirlzCrush]

*giggles* that is awesome. I never bothered with most of the advertisements in the games. but that's really funny! might have to use tupo berries if no one else has any other ideas. and even if someone does have another idea, I might have to incorporate tupari somewhere! *grins*

[MrStoob]

Cheers for the comments on the squad size thing, sorta resolved my issue but not quite from the same angle.   

[Spiritwolf1]

Have you ever hit a critical spot in your story but still have a ways to go but it like what do I do now....

[YurigirlzCrush]

I know that Aria was ousted from Omega by cerberus, but was it ever stated why cerberus wanted Omega? or was it ever mentioned that something is special about Omega? i'm planning out the course of my story and was going to start it on Omega, but I don't really know why cerberus took it to begin with, or what the reapers might have done to it during the war. was it ever talked about in the games?

also, what would be the best way to cover a long period of time? if I wanted the beginning of my story to encompass a handful of events over the course of a three year period, would it be best to put dates in there or something? I can't really think of any other way to do it, but lots of you peeps seem to have more experience. maybe there's a better option?

Modifié par YurigirlzCrush, 27 août 2012 - 01:46 .

[Spiritwolf1]

I had it as a base that guarded the Omega 4 relay which they also possessed

[Aimi]

Controlling both ends of the Omega 4 relay is extremely useful, especially since they'd want security while they ship the Reaper Brain/Heart and other sundries out. Furthermore, Omega's occupation probably wasn't undertaken because woo controlling stuff is great (although as of ME3 I suppose you can't rule out some sort of Hitlerite Final Solution to the Alien Problem), it was probably done at least partially to keep other groups from using it as a springboard to assault the labs on the other side and the Collector Base.

[lillitheris]

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

Have you ever hit a critical spot in your story but still have a ways to go but it like what do I do now....

As in, you have some slot of time before the critical event, but not sure what happens during that slot?

[lillitheris]

YurigirlzCrush wrote...

also, what would be the best way to cover a long period of time? if I wanted the beginning of my story to encompass a handful of events over the course of a three year period, would it be best to put dates in there or something? I can't really think of any other way to do it, but lots of you peeps seem to have more experience. maybe there's a better option?

Times are safe, whether absolute or relative to some event. If you can weave the time into the story itself by, say, having a character pontificate about how “three years ago to the day, blah blah”, that’ll work great…but only if you can do it for each time slice. If any of them end up needing an explicit time, you should include it in all. M’thinks.

[hot_heart]

It depends on the situation but I'd prefer to see past events mentioned in the narration rather than "Hey, remember when we did that thing those three years ago?" or "Three years ago was when that thing happened and something just reminded me of it."

Obviously, that's worst case scenario, but it's important not to make the dialogue too clunky, otherwise it just sticks out that your character has done nothing more than announce when that bit of the story takes place.

[hawat333]

Do they need a support group at all?
Is it an illness? Like alcoholism?

[Mavqt]

I find myself in the unfortunate postion of having to ask for help.

I'm having a terrible time trying to describe a hairstyle.
Thisto be precise. Any help or hints at how to describe it would be most appreciated.

[hot_heart]

mavqt wrote...

I find myself in the unfortunate postion of having to ask for help.

I'm having a terrible time trying to describe a hairstyle.
Thisto be precise. Any help or hints at how to describe it would be most appreciated.

I recognise that line.

As for the hair, it's a cropped style with a sort of feathered, spiked look on top and a slight sideways fringe? That's the best I can do.

[Spiritwolf1]

lillitheris wrote...

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

Have you ever hit a critical spot in your story but still have a ways to go but it like what do I do now....

As in, you have some slot of time before the critical event, but not sure what happens during that slot?

I had two main plots on the go and the first one is almost wrapped up, and I know where the second one is going but Im a little struggling to get on with it

[Drussius]

YurigirlzCrush wrote...

I know that Aria was ousted from Omega by cerberus, but was it ever stated why cerberus wanted Omega? or was it ever mentioned that something is special about Omega? i'm planning out the course of my story and was going to start it on Omega, but I don't really know why cerberus took it to begin with, or what the reapers might have done to it during the war. was it ever talked about in the games?

It was never talked about in the games, but according to the Mass Effect: Invasion comic miniseries, they conquered Omega so that they could keep an eye on the Omega-4 Relay and keep exclusive access to the remains of the collector base beyond the relay and all the Reaper tech stored there. 

YurigirlzCrush wrote...

also, what would be the best way to cover a long period of time? if I wanted the beginning of my story to encompass a handful of events over the course of a three year period, would it be best to put dates in there or something? I can't really think of any other way to do it, but lots of you peeps seem to have more experience. maybe there's a better option?

Dates seem to be a pretty common way of doing this sort of thing, but I'm with lill/hot_heart on this one. If you can work it into the dialogue and narratives of each section, that would be a bonus in my eyes. I think it would get a little obvious if it was always in the dialogue, but if you throw it into narrative paragraphs after each jump forward, it could work pretty seamlessly.

mavqt wrote...

I find myself in the unfortunate postion of having to ask for help.

I'm having a terrible time trying to describe a hairstyle.
Thisto be precise. Any help or hints at how to describe it would be most appreciated.

Personally, while less specific than the previous response, I would refer to a hairstyle like that as short and unruly, close-cropped and wild on top, or something along those lines.