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[Spiritwolf1]

both but mostly a motivational speech by Ashley.

Modifié par Spiritwolf1, 20 septembre 2012 - 03:55 .

[hot_heart]

Ha ha, I finally got to use my wry description of a Cannibal: a tumour that grew a batarian.

As much as I dislike describing things, it can be quite fun when done from a character's perspective. Now to think up others...

In the interest of discussion, anyone else got humorous/interesting ones they've used before?

[Obsidian Gryphon]

A tumor that grew a Batarian?   Isn't it the other way round? Batarian growing tumor before morphing Cannibal?

Stuff growing on chars, no, didn't describe explicitly. The opposing views I did in my story was of a Cerberus victim; both indoctrinated and implanted. Another was a very brief hint of Cerberus experimentation on victims. Their povs.

[hot_heart]

Obsidian Gryphon wrote...

A tumor that grew a Batarian?   Isn't it the other way round? Batarian growing tumor before morphing Cannibal?

That would be the 'wry' part.


As for the second part of your post, I'm not too sure what you're saying (if you're replying to me), and now I'm worried what I said might be confusing.

[lillitheris]

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

both but mostly a motivational speech by Ashley.

Writing rousing speeches is really hard because they need to be rousing. Most in books, games, and film tend to be pretty meh. I, personally, would once again go circumspectly about—describe the event and the feelings rather than the speech itself.

Edit: I was going to edit this and I completely forgot what I was supposed to add. Tipsy.

Modifié par lillitheris, 20 septembre 2012 - 07:34 .

[AustereLemur799]

lillitheris wrote...

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

both but mostly a motivational speech by Ashley.

Writing rousing speeches is really hard because they need to be rousing. Most in books, games, and film tend to be pretty meh. I, personally, would once again go circumspectly about—describe the event and the feelings rather than the speech itself.

Edit: I was going to edit this and I completely forgot what I was supposed to add. Tipsy.

I usually try and draw on all the badass things I've seen on various TV shows/films/books etc. Virgil, Homer and others always seem to have profound things to say (if you're into that sort of thing).

I imagine Ashley would be straight to the point - that is if you're not having her quoting some epic poetry. Sort of like 'shoot straight and don't miss'.

And, lilitheris; I don't suppose you feel like sharing that alcohol?

[AustereLemur799]

hot_heart wrote...

Ha ha, I finally got to use my wry description of a Cannibal: a tumour that grew a batarian.

Would this tumour, by any chance, be a human? I've got the book with the ME concept art somewhere, but it's been a while since I flicked through it. I believe the cannibal's arm with their weapon is actually a human (I think the human's legs fused into the weapon or something like that). Kind of gruesome to think about it...

Modifié par AustereLemur799, 20 septembre 2012 - 08:42 .

[hot_heart]

AustereLemur799 wrote...
Would this tumour, by any chance, be a human? I've got the book with the ME concept art somewhere, but it's been a while since I flicked through it. I believe the cannibal's arm with their weapon is actually a human (I think the human's legs fused into the weapon or something like that). Kind of gruesome to think about it...

Yeah, it's pretty gross. Miranda will notice that element when she's closer. For now, it's just the dry observation that it's like a bulbous growth with a batarian face.

Do you suppose Reapers smell really bad? Yep, I'm full of happy thoughts...

[lillitheris]

Would husks smell particularly bad? Probably not. Still either living tissue (new husks) or dessicated (original ones).

[hot_heart]

Yeah, no one ever says husks are stinky, but some of the other Reaper troops look pretty gruesome. Especially Ravagers.

[fainmaca]

lillitheris wrote...

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

both but mostly a motivational speech by Ashley.

Writing rousing speeches is really hard because they need to be rousing. Most in books, games, and film tend to be pretty meh. I, personally, would once again go circumspectly about—describe the event and the feelings rather than the speech itself.

Edit: I was going to edit this and I completely forgot what I was supposed to add. Tipsy.

I agree that it can be difficult, but when you get it right it can be really uplifting. Honestly, I'd say the first time I heard the speech as you take control of the Normandy (where you choose P/R options) in ME1 was really rousing. I was getting pumped, ready to go out there and take on the bad guy toe-to-toe.

I think I've only got the rousing speech done right once, and that was with Wrex in the final battle for Tuchanka:

"You all have your assignments." Shepard said gravely. "Watch out for yourselves. We can't fail here."

"We're with you one hundred per cent, Commander." Miranda said boldly.

"Good. Now, take up your positions."

The squad split up, all heading to their assigned locations in the battle group. Garrus clambered into his tank, slamming the hatch shut, while the gunship containing the heavy-hitting biotics lifted into the air. Shepard caught a brief glimpse of Jack, staring out over the battlefield with a calm interest, a slight eagerness about her poise. His thoughts were interrupted by a scratching noise emanating from every comm unit to be found in the Krogan host. A moment later, Wrex's powerful bass thrum spoke out, reaching the ears of every last soldier in the hundred thousand strong company.

"I'm not going to waste words telling you how strong we are, or how we need to work together to face this enemy. You already know that." The Urdnot chieftain began. "What I will tell you is how we need a victory today. Clan Draktarra have allied themselves with a greater force; a race of beings known as the Reapers. After that alliance was forged, they ceased to be Krogan."

Shepard's battle group had almost finished organising itself. He turned from his troops to stare ahead as Wrex continued.

"In the battle today, you may find yourself facing old friends, brothers, fathers, sons, but you must not falter. The Krogan they were have been dead for some time. Now, they crave nothing more than the death of our species. If we lose, Tuchanka will die."

Shepard lumbered up to the front of his battle group, standing with the foremost of the Battlemasters under his command. His team closed up around him. As they did so, Shepard scanned the armies around the Draktarra fortress. They appeared to be moving closer, their enemy units becoming more distinct by the second. Overhead, the ships glided closer, dangling in the air like birds of prey waiting to strike. The Commander looked over to the second of the leading battle groups, seeing the Krogan at the very front of the army as he resumed his speech.

"Veeol, Kredak, Taknurran, Shiagur, these are all names we know well. After today, the names of each and every one of you will join them in the annals of our species, your honour made immortal."

A steady thumping noise escaped from the vast host, the soil trembling beneath the Commander as he looked back in confusion. After a moment, he realised what was happening. Every Krogan was lifting their left foot in time, then sending it down in a powerful thump. In time to this, the battlemechs extended their swords and shields, smashing one against the other. The crack of metal hitting metal sounded out like thunder, mixing with the stomping as the company built themselves up into a frenzy. Even over this din, Wrex's voice still resounded powerfully clear.

"The foulest creatures of the void stand before us, but we will not falter."

A loud rumble built up in the throats of the Krogan host, a thousand voices rising as one. Shepard glanced over to see Wrex facing his troops, his battlemech's arms moving animatedly as he spoke.

"Fight with me."

Shepard could see the enemy army picking up speed now. He imagined for a moment that he could pick out a few Yahg in their ranks, but could not be sure.

"For blood and glory."

The Commander began to pound his sword against his shield in time with the Krogan around him, his pulse mixing with the rhythmic beating.

"For our people."

The war beat increased in speed, reaching a fever pitch. Shepard felt his adrenaline spike as Wrex unleashed a powerful roar.

"For Tuchankaaaaa!"

A terrible, thunderous roar tore free from the Commander's throat, joining that of the rest of the host. A hundred thousand cries rolled across the plain in a deafening tidal wave as every battlemech present thrust forward their gleaming swords, pointing them at the nearing enemy as the sun crested the horizon behind them.

"Charge!"

The army poured forward, howling as they charged. It was like unleashing the waters pent up by a dam, an unstoppable tide racing to meet the onrushing foe. Shepard focused on breathing deeply as he ran, struggling to keep ahead of his resilient Krogan allies. He glanced to the side to see Wrex at the head of his battle group, teeth bared as he hefted his battlemech's sword.

As you said, Lill, I reckon the atmosphere around the words did a lot for that scene.

Modifié par fainmaca, 20 septembre 2012 - 09:17 .

[Spiritwolf1]

hot_heart wrote...

Yeah, no one ever says husks are stinky, but some of the other Reaper troops look pretty gruesome. Especially Ravagers.

It a dead body with rotting flesh, even if it is substituted with machine parts in some places. Rotting flesh stinks, alot

[Obsidian Gryphon]

hot_heart wrote...

As for the second part of your post, I'm not too sure what you're saying (if you're replying to me), and now I'm worried what I said might be confusing.

Most likely. You were saying cannibals, batarians and tumours and then asked if anyone uses interesting/humorous ones <-- . I naturally assumed you were still on the topic of tumours/growths though I found it strange to describe them as humorous.

[AustereLemur799]

Spiritwolf1 wrote...

hot_heart wrote...

Yeah, no one ever says husks are stinky, but some of the other Reaper troops look pretty gruesome. Especially Ravagers.

It a dead body with rotting flesh, even if it is substituted with machine parts in some places. Rotting flesh stinks, alot

I'm not sure how fleshy the husks of humans are. I mean, I don't have the first clue about the science behind it; but the codex describes how the dragon's teeth (the spike things) drain all the minerals and nutrients from the body. The Reapers would likely only bother to go to the trouble of transforming things if the process somehow 'improves' the subjects (in the Reapers' eyes anyway). I should think that sweat glands and other things like hormones would be redundant and therefore discarded.

Cannibals though... Well they consume the flesh of other fallen cannibals on the battlefield in order to augment their physiology. Definitely dead, rotting, stinky flesh involved there.

And now I've just gone completely off my breakfast

[Drussius]

^ Except having smelly ground forces would just give them away during covert missions. So I'm sure the Reapers stuff air fresheners into them somewhere to counter the odor.

[AustereLemur799]

^ I also noticed on MP (because I don't play SP anymore) how the turian heads on brutes don't have the underside of a jaw. So...no mouth. So no bad breath!

Modifié par AustereLemur799, 21 septembre 2012 - 08:27 .

[hot_heart]

Obsidian Gryphon wrote...
Most likely. You were saying cannibals, batarians and tumours and then asked if anyone uses interesting/humorous ones <-- . I naturally assumed you were still on the topic of tumours/growths though I found it strange to describe them as humorous.

Yeah, I meant whether people had other interesting or humorous descriptions they'd used (and not just for Reapers).

Obviously, I don't think tumours are funny, but I found the back-to-front thought of something like that amusing. Maybe I'm just weird.

[AustereLemur799]

I don't have any funny descriptions I can think of. The only thing I can think of is more like a cultural phrase I've used in my fic. Rather than answering 'like the morning after shore leave' when someone asks how a hung-over person is feeling, I have one that goes: 'like a krogan sat on my head'.

That's not actually that funny. Maybe it's one of those things where you had to have been there in the moment to see it. Well actually I'm just not a very humourous person. Nevermind.
Moving on to spare myself from further indignity...

Well there was a time I couldn't, for the life of me, figure out how to describe certain markings on an asari's forehead. I just said it looked like the outline of a butterfly. Somerfugl in Norwegian (literally: summer bird. Makes little sense, other than the seasonal occurrence).

And this is a futile exercise for me since my brain really doesn't function without coffee in the morning.

Modifié par AustereLemur799, 21 septembre 2012 - 10:04 .

[hot_heart]

AustereLemur799 wrote...
I don't have any funny descriptions I can think of. The only thing I can think of is more like a cultural phrase I've used in my fic. Rather than answering 'like the morning after shore leave' when someone asks how a hung-over person is feeling, I have one that goes: 'like a krogan sat on my head'.

Heh, I like it. I am fond of working in cultural phrases and such.

Instead of 'couldn't hit the broadside of a barn', a few members here came up with some funny alternatives. Drussius' 'couldn't hit an ocean on Kahje' was my favourite (and one I used).

[AustereLemur799]

hot_heart wrote...

Instead of 'couldn't hit the broadside of a barn', a few members here came up with some funny alternatives. Drussius' 'couldn't hit an ocean on Kahje' was my favourite (and one I used).

Nice

I wish I could come up with more cultural gems like that, but it does sometimes require a lot of thought and head-scratching (often the simplest things slip by me).  

[AustereLemur799]

I have a serious question to put forth to all you knowledgeable peeps.

According to the wiki:
GST = Galactic Standard Time
A GS day = 20 hours
each hour = 100 minutes
each minute = 100 seconds
each second is half as long as a human second which = a 20 hour GS day is 15.7% longer than a 24 hour Terran Coordinated Universal day etc etc.

But, does anyone know how many days there are in a galactic standard year? Is that on the wiki? Am I just totally blind?

[lillitheris]

It isn’t mentioned, I’m almost certain. You could make it anything. The start date is also undefined; you could for example use the CE year that the asari and salarians created the council.

I always ‘translate’ to human timekeeping to keep things simple. On the few occasions I don’t, it’s explicitly handled.

[Spiritwolf1]

Drussius wrote...

^ Except having smelly ground forces would just give them away during covert missions. So I'm sure the Reapers stuff air fresheners into them somewhere to counter the odor.

Im not sure about this but I dont recall the Reapers really doing anything covert

[AustereLemur799]

Thanks for getting back to me. Yesterday someone on the Liara thread guessed that it was 360 days in a GS year, but they didn't specify where they got the information.

I dunno what to do. I think I'm keeping everything in GS time because it simplifies things. But then I got worried when someone (again on the Liara thread) talked about how Liara is 109 years-old in human years and 121 years-old in Thessian years.
I think I'll just pick one, say it's GST and run with it! The fanfiction label is a convenient license to screw-up, as it were.

Another thing is that I take 2183 (date of ME1) to be Council Era years. But is it actually Terran (human) years?

I know I'm griping about small things. I have numerous little mistakes across my fic that I haven't corrected yet. Hopefully they're not too immersion-breaking within the grand scheme of things.

Modifié par AustereLemur799, 21 septembre 2012 - 01:12 .

[lillitheris]

All the codex/wiki years etc. are human years. I’d definitely use normal time. Even galactic days are the same length so that works.

It’d be kinda cool to say stuff like “meet me at 14.80 o’clock”, but I think you’d want to then qualify it as early evening, too (quick test: what is that in human reckoning assuming same 0 hour?)