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[brushyourteeth]

Our Dragon Age romances have been a serious topic of discussion for literally years now. Everyone has a favorite or least favorite romanceable character. Many of us have a favorite line, scene, or moment from DA:O and DAII that moved us and got us invested in the romance with these characters. With DA: The Next Thing ™ looming on the far-off horizon, and considering that we've all had ample time to digest the romances we've experienced from Dragon Age, I'm here to ask one question:

What makes a good romance?

Here's why I'm asking. I found this brilliant quote from this topic and it summed up everything I've been thinking about the DAII romances perfectly.

Xeranx wrote...
Right now romances are very much like porn films. I'm not saying that they're that kind of trashy, but they're little more than (and forgive this reference) getting to the eventual money shot which is the sex itself. If more respect was paid to romances, I mean romances and not have the romances be meaningless tracks to sex, then I'd be all for having my hero/heroine having a child/children.

I'm not asking for Disney romance, but something that has some kind of weight to it. What we got with Morrigan and the god-child in DA:O was good, but it was sex for a baby which she may control or whatever. That's only a mite better than sex for sex sake.

Maybe someone can explain it better than I can.

Nope. I really can't. But I'll try and explain how I feel about it anyway.

Yes - I kind of felt like the point of the romances were to hurry up and get to the sex already. Some will disagree with me, saying "they knew each other for years before they got together", and they did. But we never saw that closeness. I was never a part of it. I'm not really ok with just an implied closeness. It resulted in me feeling ignored for the first half of the game and then suddenly strong-armed into a very serious relationship later on. I had absolutely no input into the pace of the relationship, because the romantic dialogues were both few in number and all scripted to happen at very specific intervals by the developers. It was a lot of "Hey, I think you're cute. Let's not talk about it for another four years though, ok?" Then we had sex, and it was like "That was great. Let's not really talk about it till the final battle, ok?" In Anders' case, I felt like the day he moved in was the day he fell out of love with me. I actually felt kind of used.

So really, Xeranx's quote got me thinking, " ok - if sex isn't actually the culmination of a relationship, what is?" And I've decided that for me it was when Alistair gave me the rose, waaaay before we ever had sex. Alistair was on new ground with a woman from day one, but the rose was him basically admitting his utter devotion to you. That you took his breath away. That everything he'd trudged through in his life up to that point was basically worth it if only for the chance to meet you. We did have sex, but I know we never would have if he hadn't cared for me enough to give me that rose.
And when Zevran gave me his earring - the earring implied trust and devotion, which was a whole lot rarer to give out than sex for Zev. The way he became nervous and for once wasn't completely sure of himself in a romantic interaction. It showed that what you had was something extra, extra special. I know he's an imaginary character, but I remember going to "bed" with him after that and feeling like it was the first time it really counted. It was the first time it really meant something - the first time he felt vulnerable, like he actually had something to lose.

I really missed that in DAII. Really I think part of the disconnect happened between friendship and rivalry - how our romantic interactions with our LI's were limited to just two or three flirt options before sex, although in reality we had twice as many spread across both paths to romance. How our opportunities of getting to know them seemed limited too. I wanted to hear Anders talk about Ferelden or the Wardens or his family the way Zev talked about Antiva and his mother and the Crows. I wanted to hear Fenris talk about his life now and who he is and who he wants to be - the way Leliana spoke about her life away from Marjolaine and her love of music, stories, and shoes. I realize they aren't the same characters, but I felt like they deserved the same depth if we were going to fall in love with them.

What makes a good romance in my opinion is depth, closeness. When you have a little crush on someone you want to learn everything about them. When you're in love you want to spend as much time with them as possible. What this means in a practical sense in a game is that the two of you need breaks away from the action to get to know and enjoy one another. You should find out more about them. They should find out more about you. I don't remember Anders or Fenris ever asking me anything about my Hawke self (only "what do you think about mages?"), but I remember that Alistair definitely asked me Warden about her origins. Maybe there could be interactions that only unlock after you've flirted. I realize that more dialogue takes up more resources, but going back to approve/disapprove may free some of those up. I'd even love a heartfelt letter or two. Small nuances like the way Alistair watched over you while you slept and talked you through the nightmare you woke from really made the relationship sparkle for me.

There's just my take on it, but my opinion really isn't the whole point of this topic. And I'm not talking about what makes a good sex scene, though that's a worthy question too - and if somone would like to make that topic, plenty of other people and myself would have plenty to say about it. What I mean is that romance and sex aren't the same thing, and sex isn't a viable substitute for romance. Give me the best dang sex scene in the world in DAIII and I still won't be satisfied without a good romance, elusive though the definition may be.

I think it's a worthy question, so I'll ask all of you brilliant BSN minds the same one I've been asking myself:

What, in your opinion, makes a good romance?

Modifié par brushyourteeth, 30 mai 2012 - 03:37 .

[wsandista]

1. Well for starters, a good character is essential for a good romance.

2. Then the plot of the romance has to be good. It also usually helps if the LI is a dynamic character.

3. Finally each romance should end up uniquely depending on the PC's choices and the LI.

The DAO romances had all three requirements, while DA2 seem to have lacked the last. that could just be my bias showing though, Morrigan, Alistair, and Zevran were amazing LIs. Leliana was ok, nut i wasn't really too fond of her, she just seemed wrong for most of my PCs.

[Orian Tabris]

What makes a good romance?

For me, they would have to do more than just sleep together and express their feelings, in whatever coy way befits them. They'd put themselves in harm's way, in order to protect their lover. So far, the closest thing to that we've seen, would be Isabela coming to Hawke's aid after abandoning him/her, though that happens whether they are in a romance or not. That is similar to what I'd like to see, but not even close. At best you've got say for example, a 2-handed warrior scythe-ing their way to an enemy who is about to kill physcially weak Merrill, saving her from being KO'd.

Also, on a sort of rivalry path, the companion would hide their feelings. Then suddenly, out of the blue, admit their appreciation and interest toward the protagonist. Preferably without giving any hint (other than maybe the approval bar) of their feelings.

Actions speak louder than words, as they say.

[rapscallioness]

I remember seeing something from one of the devs about their concern at having the romance subplots overshadow the main story. Something like that.

What I'd like to see is an elimination of that way of thinking. In other words look at the romances and main story as all one thing. Not a competition, but an integral part of each other.

Mind you, this may mean less LI choices because that can't be easy or practical. Your romance with Alistair is an integral part of the story. He is an important part of the story. As is Morrigan.

But basically, I'd just like to see a more meshed approach to the idea of romance "subplots" and the main story. A more unified way of the devs viewing the two story arcs.

[nightscrawl]

brushyourteeth wrote...

Our Dragon Age romances have been a serious topic of discussion for literally years now. Everyone has a favorite or least favorite romanceable character. Many of us have a favorite line, scene, or moment from DA:O and DAII that moved us and got us invested in the romance with these characters. With DA: The Next Thing ™ looming on the far-off horizon, and considering that we've all had ample time to digest the romances we've experienced from Dragon Age, I'm here to ask one question:

What makes a good romance?

Here's why I'm asking. I found this brilliant quote from this topic and it summed up everything I've been thinking about the DAII romances perfectly.

Xeranx wrote...
Right now romances are very much like porn films. I'm not saying that they're that kind of trashy, but they're little more than (and forgive this reference) getting to the eventual money shot which is the sex itself. If more respect was paid to romances, I mean romances and not have the romances be meaningless tracks to sex, then I'd be all for having my hero/heroine having a child/children.

I'm not asking for Disney romance, but something that has some kind of weight to it. What we got with Morrigan and the god-child in DA:O was good, but it was sex for a baby which she may control or whatever. That's only a mite better than sex for sex sake.

Maybe someone can explain it better than I can.

I like this, but I disagree in how it relates to DAO. DAO and the circumstances for romance are far different from DA2, and as such I think they should have been handled a bit differently -- and they were, but only to a point.

DAO takes place over the course of a single year. A year filled with stress, violence, constant moving and uncertainty, and in some cases tragic loss. There is a greater reason for people coming together in such times and so I think that the higher emphasis placed on sex isn't undeserved. It's a stress relief after all. Let's take Alistair as an example: as much as I like him as a character (and romance him in every play), this romance thing is completely new for him, happening at a time of great grief (Duncan's death), chaos (civil war and the Blight), and personal tumult (possibly being forced onto a throne he doesn't want or think he's suited for). All of this drawing him closer to the only other person who is able to share some of his angst, being the only other surviving Grey Warden in the whole of Ferelden. It's not surprising at all that your female Warden and Alistair can have a romance under such circumstances.

This kind of thing is in the back of my mind when I see a romance in an action or adventure movie. You have the common thread of whatever crises to draw the couple together. Once it's all over and they are safe, what do they have other than lust? Those couples, if they are going to stay together, must learn to be a normal couple. This is the reason (other than movie sexiness of course) why it's completely plausible that Indiana Jones has a different woman in each movie.

In DA2 you have the entire story spanning several years, allowing the PC to have the time to really get to know her companions, in addition to the relatively stable environment that Kirkwall provides -- stable is relative of course, certainly more stable than DAO Ferelden and the constant travel of the party camp. I would say that DA2 couples have the potential to be longer-lasting for these very reasons. I don't think it's unreasonable that the LI sex happens in Act 2. At that point you've known the LI for almost four years, having had the option of expressing an interest in Act 1 of the game. Unfortunately, I don't think the time jumps were handled as well as they could have been in terms of relationship development. It's almost presented as if the whole city were in cryo-stasis for the entirety of the three years. Our companions do not act like they have known us for that lengthy time.

While I don't think that the sex has to be, nor should it be, presented as the culmination or the high point of the romance, I think the absence of it now that we've had in in these two games, would be noticed. This is the main reason I prefer the Fenris and Isabela romances to Anders and Merrill. For Fenris and Isabela the sex was a component of their relationship, but not the defining aspect of it. The romance is finalized on their own terms after they have dealt with their personal issues. There is no sex is Act 3.

[nightscrawl]

rapscallioness wrote...

I remember seeing something from one of the devs about their concern at having the romance subplots overshadow the main story. Something like that.

What I'd like to see is an elimination of that way of thinking. In other words look at the romances and main story as all one thing. Not a competition, but an integral part of each other.

Mind you, this may mean less LI choices because that can't be easy or practical. Your romance with Alistair is an integral part of the story. He is an important part of the story. As is Morrigan.

But basically, I'd just like to see a more meshed approach to the idea of romance "subplots" and the main story. A more unified way of the devs viewing the two story arcs.

Your romance with Alistair is not integral to the story. Alistair's main character development comes during his personal quest where you have the option of Hardening him, resulting in a change in his attitude to becoming king. While this does have specific ramifications if you are in a romance with him (he will stay with you after becoming king), being in a romance is not a requirement of the Hardening process.

They don't want to mesh the romances too closely with the main plot because it will take away the optional component of the romances. Some people have no interest in doing a romance in a game and having it be integral to the story would be forcing it on those people.

[Sacred_Fantasy]

brushyourteeth wrote...
Our Dragon Age romances have been a serious topic of discussion for literally years now. Everyone has a favorite or least favorite romanceable character. Many of us have a favorite line, scene, or moment from DA:O and DAII that moved us and got us invested in the romance with these characters.

DA:O yes. DA II? I ignore friendship/rivalry/romance option in DA 2. Instead I confined myself strictly with main plot and combat.  I have no desire for naive dangerous weird looking elf. I have no desire for too predicted pirate with the golden heart who enjoy cheap sex with almost anyone and fanatic who is so bend on terrorizing the innocents regardles of humanity or the overacting emotional ex-slave who try to force his belief system on everyone. None of this characters are appealing enough for me, both in physical appearance and characteristics. I could use mods to change their appearance but then again it's pointless. I don't have that passion to care. The ones I'm interested  for viable romance option however weren't an option at all - which is beyond my understanding. I mean they gave me a proper woman and gentleman and yet they don't allow me to romance them? Yet they give me inproper-attidude characters to deal with - only with this logic, " I hit on you therefore you must love me too because I'm a PC and let's go to bed"?  Well ... urm No thanks. I rather have threesome with Isabela at a brothel  for pure pleasure than to waste my time on meaningless romance. 
 

brushyourteeth wrote...

What makes a good romance?

I agree with you on this:

brushyourteeth wrote..

What makes a good romance in my opinion is depth, closeness. When you have a little crush on someone you want to learn everything about them. When you're in love you want to spend as much time with them as possible. What this means in a practical sense in a game is that the two of you need breaks away from the action to get to know and enjoy one another. You should find out more about them.

Definitely. And in DA 2 you were not given that chance due to scheduled interaction - which I hate with every fiber being. Instead of asking more about them like, "Do you like cookie, sten?" or "Softy Sten" or expository dialogue  ( someone obviously have unfounded fear that expository dialogue would screw up character's development. ), we're stuck with character's belief system to no end. I don't care what their belief. They could be desire demon believing in possessing  a dung but still make an interesting character if they act more like normal people do like dancing under the moon or play hide and seek with the templars or collecting flowers and acting "softie"  etc.. 

brushyourteeth wrote..

They should find out more about you. I don't remember Anders or Fenris ever asking me anything about my Hawke self (only "what do you think about mages?"), but I remember that Alistair definitely asked me Warden about her origins. Maybe there could be interactions that only unlock after you've flirted. I realize that more dialogue takes up more resources, but going back to approve/disapprove may free some of those up. I'd even love a heartfelt letter or two. Small nuances like the way Alistair watched over you while you slept and talked you through the nightmare you woke from really made the relationship sparkle for me.

Yup definitely. That because romanceable characters in DA 2 have no interest with you other than sex. Morrigan dump me because she did not believe in love but still she was acting strange when I kissed Bella and Leliana or  confronting me for having a relationship with Leliana which ultimately led to an ultimatum.

Here is some my most memorable scene where Morrigan became jealous. She just dump me not too long ago. 

Morrigan: Kissing serving wenches, now? Perhaps you intend to roll around in the neares pig pen, as well?  

So what happen to "Love is for the Weak" now, Morrgan? Are you weak now? LOL
Now that's what I call interesting and fun.   

Modifié par Sacred_Fantasy, 30 mai 2012 - 06:26 .

[Iakus]

 What makes a good romance for me is, quite simply watching the characters grow closer together as the game progresses.  It's not the love scenes, I'd be perfectly happy with "fade to black"  It's watching the characters grow, develop, and change as they "find" each other.

Take DA2, one of my favorite banters is Merrill and Aveline in Act 3:

Aveline: I didn't expect you to stick around for this mess Merrill. This has nothing to do with your elves.
Merrill: I love Hawke, I wouldn't go anywhere.
Aveline: But it's not your fight.
Merrill: I love Hawke.
Aveline: You said that.
Merrill: I say it a lot. It makes things clearer, takes away doubt when everything is crazy and people are dying.
Aveline: I understand.
Merrill: Oh, good. Someone should.

Basically a few random lines as they're walking along, but it shows how far the relationship between Hawke and Merrill  had developed since they first met on Sundermount way back in Act 1

[Reznore57]

What i think makes a good romance , I'm pretty sure it can't be made on a video game.
On my personal "fantasy" romance , I like a sense of tension and longing.Like body language giving away hints.All those things that went unsaid.
Once love is "won" , I tend to get bored .
I guess the Fenris romance might have a bit of that going on , and in a book it might have blown my mind ,but in a video game it was mostly frustrating..
Now i read some writer expressing the fact that they have to give some "drama" for the magic to work , something to conquer...I understand that but the more i grow old the more i wonder.
Can just a normal , healthy relationship work ?Does it have to be less interesting?
I really like Garrus romance in Me3 , (well i like Garrus , FSHep with all her "I love Garrus Vakarian" annoys me a great deal)and i specially like all those little moments when it was simply two people trying to enjoy each other company out of the chaos outside.
There were cinematic that changed depending on your romance status , where there were tender gesture going on , like taking one's hand...
I think that was missing a lot in DA2 , the romance felt very ...well not natural , not "organic" , felt like there were stuck on special occasion and have no room to breathe outside.
I guess Merrill romance had merits because there were at least a couple of banter that show that her and hawke had affection.But since the rest of the LI were less vocal about their feelings , their romance was less "fleshed out".

Now talking about Mass Effect 3 , there 's one thing that drove me absolutely mad , it's when you got some romance shove down your throat.Like Kaidan.Damn i romanced him in ME1 mostly out of boredom and didn't care much about him.SO in ME3 having my Shep looking at him with eyes full of love when i was simply talking to Liara...I was furious.And it was impossible to just tell "dude it's over i just used you for your body get over it".I had to wait 3/4 of the game to be able to dump him.This guy felt like a ball and chain.So i hope the DA team will never pull a Kaidan on us.

As for the sex part , well some silly part of me always feel like i hit the jackpot ,I mean i could live without but the romance would have to be really good .And i recently replay DA0 ; no more sex scene please ....They made me laugh and broke the moment .

[Paul E Dangerously]

Neither DAO or DA2 really hit the right balance for me. The problem with DAO was that so much of it was done in camp, and when you compare it to how the relationship conversations in Baldur's Gate worked it was a little disappointing.

[AkiKishi]

Just like in real life it's going to vary from person to person.
I tend to think the games where you don't have a choice are better than the ones where you do. Simply because of pacing and screen time. The romance is an integrel part of the plot of the game, rather than just a tacked on option.
Choices are always a compromise since you never get 100%. Of course if you outright hate the pairing, then you may well be willing to overlook that.

Bioware is slicing the pie too thinly now. You have friend/rival mance. When it should be a mixture of both otherwise it becomes like a characterture. Sure you can have sex with someone you hate and who has completely different views from you, and it can be good (conflict sometimes works like that) . Likewise you can have the perfect happy relationship, but it's not entertaining. A mixture of the two works best. By seperating the two aspects things come across as very shallow. Likewise with the everyone is bi stance, that's slicing the pie even more thinly. Less lines = less depth of character interaction.


This one is probably still my favourite.  definately more of a romance scene than a sex scene. The song is the icing on the cake. Works even without context, works even better with.

And while I totally prefer Yullie , this one from White Knight Chronicles works really well too. . Which just goes to show getting what you want does not always make for the best story

(Yullie is the one with purple hair at the end of the clip looking sad).

Modifié par BobSmith101, 30 mai 2012 - 08:17 .

[Sejborg]

What makes a good romance?

Affection.

[LolaLei]

For me personally it's the thrill of the chase that interests me. I like getting to know the character, hear their story and learn about their past. I like witnessing the potential love interests behaviour towards you change as they gradually fall for you (like they did in DA:O.) DA2 was lacking that gradual progression, which you'd think would have been a big part of the game considering it took place during the course of 10 years.

The "sex scenes" aren't important to me but when they're put in a game you may as well make some effort with it and play on its ambience and surroundings, preferably capturing the characters emotions (be it love, lust, anger, sadness, longing or whatever) rather than it being just about the sexual act (for shock value) or a lacklustre event that may as well be removed. I mean, I know DA wants to be careful about how much they show during these scenes but ME3 managed to pull of some awesome ones that weren't gratuitous at all.

[LeBurns]

Still waiting to see Leliana's pressed flower book. I swear the woman is lying to me.

I hate to say it, but Alistair's was pretty good. He was very inexperienced and fumbled all over himself. Similar to the way someone would in real life. Then he totally blew it when he said "I think I am in love with you and we need to have sex right now...". I was like 'what the heck!' where did that come from?

[brushyourteeth]

LeBurns wrote...

Still waiting to see Leliana's pressed flower book. I swear the woman is lying to me.

I hate to say it, but Alistair's was pretty good. He was very inexperienced and fumbled all over himself. Similar to the way someone would in real life. Then he totally blew it when he said "I think I am in love with you and we need to have sex right now...". I was like 'what the heck!' where did that come from?

Aw, I eventually started planning ahead to make that scene happen at our last night at camp before meeting the Archdemon, so the sense of urgency actually felt perfect! 

That's the kind of scene that I really don't mind being a scripted event.
It made much more sense for Alistair to be willing to take that leap if he thought you both might not live through the next day's events.

[ReallyRue]

I think this description of the romances fits ME's style a lot more than DA's. For one thing, ME's romance progression literally is a long (or short) build up to a sex scene just before the final battle. ME3 was slightly different with the conversation during the final run, but still basically fit this description.

In DA, however, the romance scene can occur whenever you hit the required amount of approval in DAO and there's plenty of room for conversation not only after the sex part, but in the game, because unless your Warden sleeps with the LI after the Landsmeet, there's plenty of time to progress. There are also a few unique scenes like the gift one, the conversations before the Denerim battle, Zevran's story about Rinna, the OBG with Morrigan and the Landsmeet with Alistair. DA2's romance scenes are usually triggered in Act 2, as far as I've experienced, which hardly makes it the culmination of the romance. In Isabela's romance, I really liked her post-sex heart-to-heart with Hawke, her Act 3 conversations, particularly where she asks Hawke to sail off on her ship together, and her conversation before the final battle. Those were the culmination of the romance, to me, not the fling beforehand.

Modifié par ReallyRue, 30 mai 2012 - 08:03 .

[Iakus]

sjpelkessjpeler wrote...

Sejborg wrote...

What makes a good romance?

Affection.

 spot on.

Indeed. Good answer

[Kyda]

What makes a good romance?...
Hmmm... Lets see if I can get some clear ideas of what would make a good romance for me.

Starting from the old games to the news I should point out the fact that "not knowing" I am building up a possible relation is actually a plus for me. For instance the first time I played BG2 I didn´t know Anomen was a LI so I accidentally shut him down (even though I was always nice to him when he talked about all his grand campaigns;)) when he gave me the flower because I was like: what the hell are you giving me this for (I was sitting in my desk blushing with surprise)... lol. I finished the game and when I found out and replayed the game I tried his romance out. For me, not having a heart icon is what makes the "romance" more interesting. I do not want to know that I will romance him; I want to talk to him to see if he grows on me. People can get physically attracted to others but also romances can start between 2 people that did not exactly feel physical attraction so with that in mind I want to talk to my companions (or other NPCs) to see if I care more (or less) for them (Example: Garrus. It took this guy a whole game to grow on me).

Another thing that´s related to the first one is the possibility to have as much interactions as doable. The more you learn about the LI the closer you feel. Even though I like the idea of starting a conversation whenever I want, I also enjoyed those conversations back in BG2 that suddenly pop up (and it wasn´t romance exclusive). I know that sometimes they were sort of out of place (although they didn´t happen in caves and underground if I remember correctly) but it was nice to see them have a mind of their own. This happens also in DA:O in certain places.

I do not like to feel like I am stalking the guy. Jacob and Garrus come to mind. Garrus because to pursue the romance I had to say completely out of the blue that I wanted to “release the pressure” together (what?!!! No one thought about another line better than that??!!) and Jacob because every time I wanted some personal information Fshep had this weird voice and look that would make me cringe (and I wasn´t even trying to romance Jacob, I haven´t tried his romance out yet).

I do not mind if the romance is set to culminate in the famous sex scene at the night before the big fight but if it doesn´t happen that way then it is important to me to feel that the relation continues (or it doesn´t but you can actually discuss that). I remember being dump by Alistair because I was a dalish elf and I made him king. I was like: what the hell?! So I went to the camp and talked to him and there actually was an option to discuss that, it was awesome. I never got the chance to change his mind but at least I could let him know how I felt. The space jumps in DA2 didn´t work with the romances: Fenris had too long of a breakup to feel connected with him and Anders felt still like a stranger even though living in the same house.

The small things help. Like holding hands or a kiss every once in a while. ME3 did this actually pretty good. I have played it only once (until EC) and was faithful to Kaidan and the looks they gave each other, or Fshep checking Kaidan out and the holding hands was actually pretty nice. I can´t comment how that is for people who don´t want to romance him though, :innocent:. Oh! And the date!! Also comes to mind the “almost” kiss scene in ME1. I thought that was great.

Romances shouldn´t be set on stone. If you do something your LI is heartily against then there should be repercussions. Also fights could be a nice add on. I remember one in DA:O where I you can forgive Alistair for something… or was it apologize to him, I can´t quite remember what it was about, but it was good. You don´t always have to agree on something and that could give some cool conversations/arguments.

I think that´s mostly it… I can´t remember anything else but if I had to choose something of the list I would go with interaction (as in dialog options). The more the better.

[Vormaerin]

Frankly, I don't care if there is a sex scene or not. The best romance, imho, was Jaheira's in BG2. (once you ignore that it has to start when her husband's body is barely cold because the game's timeline is an epic plothole).

Jaheira's unfolded slowly, wasn't easy or obvious, had issues even if you did it 'right', allowed you to buy gifts, could go badly wrong, had heroics, and more.


I think I'm too old and cynical for the Jack/Morrigan/Isabella/Viconia style 'bad girl redeemed by love' stories. Zevran is basically one of those, too. And the Merrill/Aerie type waifs just don't appeal.

[Samuel_Valkyrie]

The essence of a good romanc is: people love to hear "I love you" said in different ways. That is the core of a romance, that moment where everything falls away, and nothing else matters but those three words. "I love you." Everything else before it is build-up, and everything after it is character development.

Now, Bioware tends to make this climax fall at the same moment as the sex-scene. The reasons for that are fairly obvious, one of them being that, still, a large segment of their audience ar young men, for whom love and sex are irtually the same thing. It's easy to confuse the two.

Now, as I said, everthing that happens before those three words are build-up. If everything goes smooth, it's nice, but nothing special. But, the harder the road to this moment is, the more emotional turmoil, the more obstacles the pair has to surpass, the higher the emotional pay-off in that single moment is. You're investing emotional energy into the relationship, and the more emotional energy is invested, the more is released during the 'I love you' scene. So, obstacles and build-up make a good romance.

However, what happens after the three words is equally important. In most Bioware games, this moment comes just before the final act, which leaves no time for post-coital character development. Which is easy, as a writer, because you don't have to worry about your love-interest anymore, and can focus all your attention to the task at hand.
DA2 is different, in that the love-scene happens in the middle of the game. Which gives ample opportunity to build the characters from this point forward.

I'm taking the Male Friendship-Romance with Merrill as an example here, because it is my favorite pairing in the game.

The goal in this part of the story is to show how the pair relates as a whole. How one affects the other, and vice versa. I like the Merrill romance, because they show how dedicated Merrill is to her LI, and how his presence gives her confidence. As I said before, people love to hear "I love you" said in different ways. Each of the little things that Merrill does tells the audience she loves Hawke: The fact that she's more at ease around Hawke; the fact that she leaves her mirror at her old place to protect him; the fact that she wears a new outfit...all this and more, they all say "I love you" in different ways. And that is the core of a good romance.