314 réponses à ce sujet

[Soltana]

Dear Joker,

Sorry about what happened to EDI. You should know that I know exactly what you're going through.

Oh wait, no I don't. My girlfriend had enough EMS. LOL!

Your friend,
Garrus

[Abraham_uk]

Steel Dancer wrote...

Abraham_uk wrote...

Dear Wrex

I know you're still angry about having green eyes. But at least I Shepard your people from the Genophage. And I got you Eve for company. You're still displeased?

Ever since EDI turned green she's been creaping me out with talk about being alive. She keeps saying how amazing it is to feel me. She keeps saying weird stuff like that. Really creepy right?

The Geth have also been really over friendly. One of the Geth asked me out on a date with the words "Does this unit deserve fun?" I never realised that the Geth had it in them to act like *****/

On the positive side I no longer have to worry about breaking my bones!

Sincerely

Joker

P.S. There is nothing scarier than a Krogan with glowing green eyes.

I agree. My firstborn with Bakura had glowing green eyes. Very strange.

I ate him.

Sincerely,

Wrex.

Dear Wrex

You remember last time we spoke, I told you that Geth had been chatting me up. That's nothing. I have had dating requests from husks, brutes, banshees and even ravagers. Do you remember the good old days when we used to kill those monsters? Now these dudes are asking me out. Just creeps me out.

Sincerely

Joker

P.s. you were joking when you said you ate your own baby. Right?

[Abraham_uk]

Allstar27 wrote...

Dear Harbinger

ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL!!!

From A.I Shepard

P.S I know this hurts you

I love this!

[Dragon_Claw]

Dear James.

You only have 1 month left of your contract with the Alliance.
So it´s lucky that we got a call from a casting agent!
I´ve seen that you love to work out, fight and if you can manage The Fistpump, then you ready for television.

Commander Femshep.

Modifié par Dragon_Claw, 10 juillet 2012 - 09:03 .

[CptData]

Soltana wrote...

Dear Joker,

Sorry about what happened to EDI. You should know that I know exactly what you're going through.

Oh wait, no I don't. My girlfriend had enough EMS. LOL!

Your friend,
Garrus

Dear Garrus,

I just talked to Engineer Adams: it may take months to return to Earth. Sure she's waiting for you?

PS: EDI's body is still fully functional.

Joker

[Abraham_uk]

I always wanted to see racist banter between Ashley and Garrus. Sadly I can't pull of racist banter and make it funny.


Dear Ashley

If you are going to kiss a turian on the cheek, make sure you kiss the cheek that hasn't been blown to pieces.

Sincerely
Garrus


Dear Garrus

Why do you insist on wearing your full armour including both your guns during make out? You have any idea how uncomfortable that is negotiating round your plating?

Sincerely
Ashley

Modifié par Abraham_uk, 10 juillet 2012 - 09:10 .

[Dragon_Claw]

Dear Dr. Chakwas.

I´ve got a sudden burning itch, that I need you to take a look at...
And as your superior officer, I demand to look in Garrus medical files!

Commander Femshep.

[CptData]

Abraham_uk wrote...

Dear Garrus

Why do you insist on wearing your full armour including both your guns during make out? You have any idea how uncomfortable that is negotiating round your plating?

Sincerely
Ashley

Dear Ashley,

I have reach. Shepard told me you got flexibility. Interested in a sparring session?

BR
Garrus


PS: Bring dextro wine. I'll have levo wine.

[Dragon_Claw]

Dear Samantha.

I just wanted to confirm our chess game in my cabin this evening.
And Traynor. Remember that you are a marine. Marines don´t plan, they improvise!

Commander Broshep.

[krukow]

CptData wrote...

Abraham_uk wrote...

Dear Garrus

Why do you insist on wearing your full armour including both your guns during make out? You have any idea how uncomfortable that is negotiating round your plating?

Sincerely
Ashley

Dear Ashley,

I have reach. Shepard told me you got flexibility. Interested in a sparring session?

BR
Garrus


PS: Bring dextro wine. I'll have levo wine.

Dear Garrus,
Sorry, but that would require leaving starboard observation, and I only do that on missions or the night before we launch final assaults.
Maybe after the war, assuming we don't get stranded on some undeveloped jungle planet where you won't have any food.

Ash

[CptData]

krukow wrote...

CptData wrote...

Abraham_uk wrote...

Dear Garrus

Why do you insist on wearing your full armour including both your guns during make out? You have any idea how uncomfortable that is negotiating round your plating?

Sincerely
Ashley

Dear Ashley,

I have reach. Shepard told me you got flexibility. Interested in a sparring session?

BR
Garrus


PS: Bring dextro wine. I'll have levo wine.

Dear Garrus,
Sorry, but that would require leaving starboard observation, and I only do that on missions or the night before we launch final assaults.
Maybe after the war, assuming we don't get stranded on some undeveloped jungle planet where you won't have any food.

Ash

Dear Ashley, dear Garrus,

I read your mails, and according to the data I collected, it's going to happen that way if Shepard can't amass enough allies to defeat the Reapers on Earth. In that case the Normandy will be screwed and Shepard dies. Support him to gain maximum assets and the ship may lift off and return to Earth, where Shepard barely survived the events of the final hours.

BR
Shadow Broker

PS: this info is for free. Next time, I'll charge 5000 Credits per word.

[Chun Hei]

Dear FemShep,

I appreciate that you murdered every synthetic being the universe so you could survive and we could be together but I feel I should confess to you that I have been spending a lot of quality time with James Vega. He has the reach and I like being flexible.

Still friends?

Garrus

[RedHotElite]

Commander Shepard

Can you come down to the engineering deck and tell the Quarian to stop harrassing me. I have every reason to believe she is intoxicated, and she keeps saying something about an emergency induction port. Please, before I throw her out of the airlock.

Javik

[krukow]

Deer Sheperd,

I wish we hadnt left earth. I want fite their, but if u say that we shud go get alys, then I wil halp you.

Cant weight to returnt to earth to fite repers thou.

Jams

PS I can does one hunderd pull ups now

[Abraham_uk]

Chun Hei wrote...

Dear FemShep,

I appreciate that you murdered every synthetic being the universe so you could survive and we could be together but I feel I should confess to you that I have been spending a lot of quality time with James Vega. He has the reach and I like being flexible.

Still friends?

Garrus

Dear Garrus

Okay I can live with the getting dumped part.

But dumped for James? Seriously? Of all the potential candidates on the Normandy. You had Tali, Liara, Samantha, Joker, Cortez, Ashley, Diana, Javik (not sure if he goes both ways but he does have both reach and flexibility).

You had choices. Many choices. But you chose James. Really? James?

From

FemShep

P.s. Still friends. But James? Seriously?

[Dragon_Claw]

KevinHawke wrote...

Commander Shepard

Can you come down to the engineering deck and tell the Quarian to stop harrassing me. I have every reason to believe she is intoxicated, and she keeps saying something about an emergency induction port. Please, before I throw her out of the airlock.

Javik

And y luv me t2 !!!

Taliiiiiiiiiiiii

[CptData]

krukow wrote...

Deer Sheperd,

I wish we hadnt left earth. I want fite their, but if u say that we shud go get alys, then I wil halp you.

Cant weight to returnt to earth to fite repers thou.

Jams

PS I can does one hunderd pull ups now

Dear James.

Stop drinking stuff. Also stop making my girlfriend drunk.

BR
Commander Shepard

PS: I can do 500. Cybernetics.

Modifié par CptData, 10 juillet 2012 - 09:39 .

[Ageless Face]

Dear Harbinger,

You bring me flowers, open doors for me, give me humans genetic material... You are a real gentleman.

But you see Harby darling, it's not you. It's me. I am on a very soft spot in my life right now, I can't get into deep relationships. I hope you will understand and we can continue to be friends.

Yours,
Reaper Shepard.


Dear Javik,

WHY YOU NO ROMANCE OPTION??????

Yours,
HagarIshay.

[Dragon_Claw]

Dear Liara.

After last nights mindf*cking, I woke up and can´t remember any of my skill points!

Commander Femshep.

[BadExamp1e]

Dear Commander Shepard,

I am a pony.

Yours truly, Javik.

[RedHotElite]

Dragon_Claw wrote...

KevinHawke wrote...

Commander Shepard

Can you come down to the engineering deck and tell the Quarian to stop harrassing me. I have every reason to believe she is intoxicated, and she keeps saying something about an emergency induction port. Please, before I throw her out of the airlock.

Javik

And y luv me t2 !!!

Taliiiiiiiiiiiii

Quarian

That's it. Out the airlock you go.

Javik

[krukow]

Dear Skipper,
You do realize that EDI's new body tried to murder me on Mars. And now you're letting it wander around the ship? I don't feel comfortable with this. I will be staying in my room until this situation is dealt with

Ash

<later>

Dear Skipper,
Well, that was one way of dealing with it. I'm not sure that you neccessarily needed to kill every synthetic in the galaxy, but you did get rid of the robot body that tried to kill me. So yes, I'm willing to come out of my room now.

Ash
PS: Also, congrats on defeating the reapers as well.

[BadExamp1e]

Dear Ashley,

I heard that the Normandy crash landed on a jungle planet and that you're in charge now.

Please don't let everyone die.

-- Skipper.

Modifié par BadExamp1e, 10 juillet 2012 - 10:01 .

[Arivael]

krukow wrote...

Dear Skipper,
You do realize that EDI's new body tried to murder me on Mars. And now you're letting it wander around the ship? I don't feel comfortable with this. I will be staying in my room until this situation is dealt with

Ash

<later>

Dear Skipper,
Well, that was one way of dealing with it. I'm not sure that you neccessarily needed to kill every synthetic in the galaxy, but you did get rid of the robot body that tried to kill me. So yes, I'm willing to come out of my room now.

Ash
PS: Also, congrats on defeating the reapers as well.

Dear Lt.Cmdr Williams

I must inform you that Shepard is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Shepard back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Modifié par Arivael, 10 juillet 2012 - 10:14 .

[Abraham_uk]

Dear Shepard

I have now made it to your personal bed room. I love your fish tank. I love your display of ships. I love your bed. Wow. Now that you've taken down Cerberus and are about to return to Earth there is just one thing I need you to do. Come to your personal quarters. I am waiting.

Sinerely

Maurader Shields.