314 réponses à ce sujet

[BadExamp1e]

Arivael wrote...

krukow wrote...

Dear Skipper,
You do realize that EDI's new body tried to murder me on Mars. And now you're letting it wander around the ship? I don't feel comfortable with this. I will be staying in my room until this situation is dealt with

Ash

<later>

Dear Skipper,
Well, that was one way of dealing with it. I'm not sure that you neccessarily needed to kill every synthetic in the galaxy, but you did get rid of the robot body that tried to kill me. So yes, I'm willing to come out of my room now.

Ash
PS: Also, congrats on defeating the reapers as well.

Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to spell-check it.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Modifié par BadExamp1e, 10 juillet 2012 - 10:12 .

[krukow]

BadExamp1e wrote...

Arivael wrote...

krukow wrote...

Dear Skipper,
You do realize that EDI's new body tried to murder me on Mars. And now you're letting it wander around the ship? I don't feel comfortable with this. I will be staying in my room until this situation is dealt with

Ash

<later>

Dear Skipper,
Well, that was one way of dealing with it. I'm not sure that you neccessarily needed to kill every synthetic in the galaxy, but you did get rid of the robot body that tried to kill me. So yes, I'm willing to come out of my room now.

Ash
PS: Also, congrats on defeating the reapers as well.

Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to use spell-check. It'll help you out there.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt. Cmdr. Williams

I'm the one who brought him back to life, so I'll spell it how I want.
Didn't you get drunk and make out with Vega?

Miranda Lawson

[Arivael]

BadExamp1e wrote...

Arivael wrote...


Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to spell-check it.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt.Cmdr Williams

Do you have any idea how hard it is to even find a working computer on Earth right now? No you would not as you ran away. I think I should also inform you that I may be making certian additions to Shepard this time around just to make sure thing go as planned.

Lawson.

Modifié par Arivael, 10 juillet 2012 - 10:18 .

[Dragon_Claw]

Dear Miranda.

I´ve just been forwarded a message from the Alliance accountant.
A receipt was attached. It´s originated from an private clinic on Illium.
How in the hell do you justify 80.000 credits for an "buttocks enhancment" on the Alliances expenses?!?

Commander Femshep.

Modifié par Dragon_Claw, 10 juillet 2012 - 10:19 .

[BadExamp1e]

krukow wrote...

BadExamp1e wrote...

Arivael wrote...

krukow wrote...

Dear Skipper,
You do realize that EDI's new body tried to murder me on Mars. And now you're letting it wander around the ship? I don't feel comfortable with this. I will be staying in my room until this situation is dealt with

Ash

<later>

Dear Skipper,
Well, that was one way of dealing with it. I'm not sure that you neccessarily needed to kill every synthetic in the galaxy, but you did get rid of the robot body that tried to kill me. So yes, I'm willing to come out of my room now.

Ash
PS: Also, congrats on defeating the reapers as well.

Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to use spell-check. It'll help you out there.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt. Cmdr. Williams

I'm the one who brought him back to life, so I'll spell it how I want.
Didn't you get drunk and make out with Vega?

Miranda Lawson

Miranda,

Nope. I don't recall that. I don't do the deed with my subordinates. I just get really drunk, dance, and make an ass of myself in private. Your information is incorrect, or perhaps Liara is trolling you and feeding you BS on purpose.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Modifié par BadExamp1e, 10 juillet 2012 - 10:23 .

[BadExamp1e]

Arivael wrote...

BadExamp1e wrote...

Arivael wrote...


Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to spell-check it.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt.Cmdr Williams

Do you have any idea how hard it is to even find a working computer on Earth right now? No you would not as you ran away. I think I should also inform you that I may be making certian additions to Shepard this time around just to make sure thing go as planned.

Lawson.

Miranda,

Your sources must be terrible. Ran away? I was fighting with him on Earth, before he literally pushed my ass on the Normandy.

Additions? Like a control chip? Over my dead body. He isn't your lab-rat anymore.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

[krukow]

BadExamp1e wrote...

krukow wrote...

BadExamp1e wrote...

Arivael wrote...

Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to use spell-check. It'll help you out there.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt. Cmdr. Williams

I'm the one who brought him back to life, so I'll spell it how I want.
Didn't you get drunk and make out with Vega?

Miranda Lawson

Miranda,

Nope. I don't recall that. I don't do the deed with my subordinates. I just get really drunk, dance, and make an ass of myself in private. Your information is incorrect, or perhaps Liara is trolling you and feeding you BS on purpose.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt. Cmdr. Williams

I was there when Liara became Shadow Broker.  I seriously doubt any bad information from her is intentional.

M. Lawson

[RedHotElite]

Dragon_Claw wrote...

Dear Miranda.

I´ve just been forwarded a message from the Alliance accountant.
A receipt was attached. It´s originated from an private clinic on Illium.
How in the hell do you justify 80.000 credits for an "buttocks enhancment" on the Alliances expenses?!?

Commander Femshep.

Dear Commander Femshep a.k.a. Queen of the Girl Scouts,

Does this mean I can kill the Cerberus cheerleader now? Cause if you want me to, I will.

Jack

P.S. F***. I've been wanting to say that for soooooooooo long.

[BadExamp1e]

krukow wrote...

BadExamp1e wrote...

krukow wrote...

BadExamp1e wrote...

Arivael wrote...

Dear LT.CDR Williams

I must inform you that Sheperd is in no condition to respond right now due to almost being kill (again) like last time you have run away and left me to put Sheperd back together, I will be getting my just rewards once Sheperd is up to some strenuos physical activity this time.

Miranda Lawson

Dear Miranda Lawson,

His surname is "Shepard" not "Sheperd"

Next time you send a message remember to use spell-check. It'll help you out there.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt. Cmdr. Williams

I'm the one who brought him back to life, so I'll spell it how I want.
Didn't you get drunk and make out with Vega?

Miranda Lawson

Miranda,

Nope. I don't recall that. I don't do the deed with my subordinates. I just get really drunk, dance, and make an ass of myself in private. Your information is incorrect, or perhaps Liara is trolling you and feeding you BS on purpose.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Lt. Cmdr. Williams

I was there when Liara became Shadow Broker.  I seriously doubt any bad information from her is intentional.

M. Lawson

Miranda,

From what I heard, you got knocked out and Shepard and Liara took down the Broker.

You sure about that? Liara shared your internet history with me.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

[Arivael]

BadExamp1e wrote...

Miranda,

Nope. I don't recall that. I don't do the deed with my subordinates. I just get really drunk, dance, and make an ass of myself in private. Your information is incorrect, or perhaps Liara is trolling you and feeding you BS on purpose.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Williams,

Just your superiors then, well that would exsplain how you went from Operations chief to Lt.Cmdr in less than a year.

Lawsons.

[BadExamp1e]

Arivael wrote...

BadExamp1e wrote...

Miranda,

Nope. I don't recall that. I don't do the deed with my subordinates. I just get really drunk, dance, and make an ass of myself in private. Your information is incorrect, or perhaps Liara is trolling you and feeding you BS on purpose.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

Williams,

Just your superiors then, well that would exsplain how you went from Operations chief to Lt.Cmdr in less than a year.

Lawsons.

Miranda,

Nope. Just one.

We've had some good fights, if you know what I mean. And I'm pretty sure you do.

-- Lt. Cmdr. Williams.

[CptData]

Arivael wrote...

Williams,

Just your superiors then, well that would exsplain how you went from Operations chief to Lt.Cmdr in less than a year.

Lawsons.

Lawson,

I don't know who's feeding you with false information, but it's obviously you don't know anything about regulations in the Alliance Navy.
Mind if we quit fighting? I'm currently busy with keeping my crew alive ...

BR
Lt. Cmdr. Ashley Williams

[almondroy]

CptData wrote...

Arivael wrote...

Williams,

Just your superiors then, well that would exsplain how you went from Operations chief to Lt.Cmdr in less than a year.

Lawsons.

Lawson,

I don't know who's feeding you with false information, but it's obviously you don't know anything about regulations in the Alliance Navy.
Mind if we quit fighting? I'm currently busy with keeping my crew alive ...

BR
Lt. Cmdr. Ashley Williams

Dear Jeff:

I know you find it highly amusing when I read this email chain routed through my processors to you, but must you really insist I pantomime each person when they're speaking?

Love, EDI

[Soltana]

Dear you guys,

I have never seen a more passive-aggressive way to conduct a waifu war. Well done, thread.

XOXO,
Soltana

[Arivael]

Dear Ashley,

Well its nice to see that Shepard made a good choice with you, just had to be sure or I may have had to take measurers to make him reconsider it. He's all yours when you get back just be gental with him he is still a bit delicate but he should be up to some light sailing by the time you get back here.

Miranda.

p.s. Please tell Joker I have a back up copy of Edi here and once loaded in the Normany she should be just as she was before.

[krukow]

Soltana wrote...

Dear you guys,

I have never seen a more passive-aggressive way to conduct a waifu war. Well done, thread.

XOXO,
Soltana

I actually prefer Ash, it was just too funny to not keep going.

[CptData]

Arivael wrote...

Dear Ashley,

Well its nice to see that Shepard made a good choice with you, just had to be sure or I may have had to take measurers to make him reconsider it. He's all yours when you get back just be gental with him he is still a bit delicate but he should be up to some light sailing by the time you get back here.

Miranda.

p.s. Please tell Joker I have a back up copy of Edi here and once loaded in the Normany she should be just as she was before.

Dear Miranda,

I'm not sure if I can keep my mouth shut. And then there's a certain Shadow Broker reading my mails - bet she's going to tell him.
Is there any way to save EDI's memories? I'm interested in the last months since Joker unshackled her. EDI won't be the same without those memories, even if you have a backup.

Anyhow, I won't break Shepard once I come back, I promise.

Ashley

[BadExamp1e]

All in good fun lol

[Arivael]

CptData wrote...

Arivael wrote...

Dear Ashley,

Well its nice to see that Shepard made a good choice with you, just had to be sure or I may have had to take measurers to make him reconsider it. He's all yours when you get back just be gental with him he is still a bit delicate but he should be up to some light sailing by the time you get back here.

Miranda.

p.s. Please tell Joker I have a back up copy of Edi here and once loaded in the Normany she should be just as she was before.

Dear Miranda,

I'm not sure if I can keep my mouth shut. And then there's a certain Shadow Broker reading my mails - bet she's going to tell him.
Is there any way to save EDI's memories? I'm interested in the last months since Joker unshackled her. EDI won't be the same without those memories, even if you have a backup.

Anyhow, I won't break Shepard once I come back, I promise.

Ashley

Dear Ashley
According to the file it was last updated just before that attack on Cronus Station so all Edi's memorys up until that point should be there, as for anything after that you would do better to ask Tali to see if Edi was keeping a spare memory archive in the Normands computer isolated from her main program, if so she should be able to reintergrate them after being uploaded again.

Also they have just published the names of the first group of survivors from the Citadal, your family was not among them but they think there are another 4000 or so still traped up there.

Miranda.

p.s. Liara you father was among the first group and has already taken over running the local bar.

[o Ventus]

Dear Joker,

Just blew up the Reapers. Say hi to EDI for me.

Shepard.

[Abraham_uk]

Dear Shepard

I'm not sure if you'll ever recieve this message. With you being, reaper tech and all. But we have a new Captain. Captain North. He's a sweet guy. But he makes loads of really bad jokes and seems to be everywhere, inserting his voice into everything.

Your passing has been hard on Miranda and Ashley, who still fight over you as if you're still alive.
Javik has been trying to throw Captain Nolan North out of the airlock without success.
Tali Zorah has returned to Rannoch.
James Vega has a new assignment. Something to do with dinosaurs. I dunno.
Liara T'Soni now has a proper Shadow Broker Base, so that she can link you up to the Geth collective.

Damn it Shepard. I miss you. There isn't a day that goes by when I wonder what you're doing.
What's it like controlling the Reapers anyway?

Sincerely

Joker

Modifié par Abraham_uk, 10 juillet 2012 - 11:18 .

[Steel Dancer]

Abraham_uk wrote...

Steel Dancer wrote...

Abraham_uk wrote...

Dear Wrex

I know you're still angry about having green eyes. But at least I Shepard your people from the Genophage. And I got you Eve for company. You're still displeased?

Ever since EDI turned green she's been creaping me out with talk about being alive. She keeps saying how amazing it is to feel me. She keeps saying weird stuff like that. Really creepy right?

The Geth have also been really over friendly. One of the Geth asked me out on a date with the words "Does this unit deserve fun?" I never realised that the Geth had it in them to act like *****/

On the positive side I no longer have to worry about breaking my bones!

Sincerely

Joker

P.S. There is nothing scarier than a Krogan with glowing green eyes.

I agree. My firstborn with Bakura had glowing green eyes. Very strange.

I ate him.

Sincerely,

Wrex.

Dear Wrex

You remember last time we spoke, I told you that Geth had been chatting me up. That's nothing. I have had dating requests from husks, brutes, banshees and even ravagers. Do you remember the good old days when we used to kill those monsters? Now these dudes are asking me out. Just creeps me out.

Sincerely

Joker

P.s. you were joking when you said you ate your own baby. Right?

Really? EDI should shoot them. They'd stay clear then.

Sincerely,

Wrex.

PS.  What IS the maximum yield on a Thanix cannon?

PPS. Of course I'm joking. Bakura ate him. Know anywhere that sells good toothpicks?

[sylnnn]

Chun Hei wrote...

Dear FemShep,

I appreciate that you murdered every synthetic being the universe so you could survive and we could be together but I feel I should confess to you that I have been spending a lot of quality time with James Vega. He has the reach and I like being flexible.

Still friends?

Garrus

HAHAHAHAHAHA

[sylnnn]

Garrus

Since your old partner is now a digital girlscout goddess and all... and holograms just don't cut it...
Wanna spar?

Jack

ps I heard you Turians are in to death metal, bring your playlist.

[Asch Lavigne]

Dear Oriana Lawson;

Roses are red
Your sister is dead
Her body is lying in a Collector ditch
F**k the cheerleader b***h!

- Jacqueline Naught



Dear Jack Harper; (for those of you who know who that is)

F**k you!

- Jack aka "Subject Zero"