314 réponses à ce sujet

[Tashash]

Hyrule_Gal wrote...

Dear Thane

I know you're very busy with the Hanar on Kahje but I thought I'd write to you. I met your cousin Tink Krios in the hospital today. I was there to see Ash but I spotted the family resemblance and decided to pop in to be polite. He was a tad delirious from his medication, he was acting like he was you! Well an earlier version of you anyway,  before you woke up . Instead of correcting him I just went along with it, he was very ill so I thought it would be best to humour him. I mean he was even wearing that jacket you said went missing!

Poor guy.I promise to keep an eye on him for you. Hopefully he doesn't do anything silly in his state. An accountant thinking he's the universe's best assassin could get him hurt but I'll make sure that won't happen. Anyway, after you make more progress with the Hanar scientists I'll be heading to Kahje to meet you. Hopefully that breakthrough will help your people like you hoped...and give us the future we’ve been fighting for. See you soon.
 
Your siha

Dear Kai Leng,

You do realise that you just killed some poor, terminally ill accountant? Surely you realised that wasn't actually Thane Krios? Did you not notice all the mistakes he made? It seems you do, and your bragging is really obnoxious. The fact that he actually got several hits in is a good indication of how bad you are at this assassination gig.

By the way, Thane's really pissed that you killed his favourite (though slightly derpy) cousin, and since he's back to full health now I'd watch my back if I was you.

Just a friendly warning.  
Fem Shepard.

[FahRENheit06]

Dear Kai Leng,
Who does your nails? Specialist Traynor is shyte with manicures.

Hugs and kisses and bullets,
Commander Jane Shepard.

[ShallowlLife9871]

 Dear Liara, Allers, Kelly, Shaila and Consort.

NO MEANS NO! 

From FemShep

ps, Liara, we need to talk about some things I found in your aparment,,,,

[Twilight_Princess]

Dear nightmare child,

Could you please be a character I actually give a **** about? K Thanks

Shepard

[aMytallica]

Shiala,

Why are you green?

Shepard

[Dragon_Claw]

CHALET wrote...

Dear Kelly.

What happened to your face?

Incidently, thanks for looking after my fish and pet varren whilst I'm in here. You sure were keen to look after him. You're a pet person, I respect that... though I barely got a 'goodbye' in between the petting him, but we were all shocked by the whole arrest thing so you're forgiven. 

PS: It's probably just a coincidence but I've been suffering from this awful itch since we hooked up. I think it might just be these crappy Alliance beds or Mordin was trolling me with mini-mini-mini swarmers. Just a thought.

Yours,
Commander Shepard.

Dear Commander Shepard.

Ms. Chambers is in no condition to repley your email.....

Team Firefly
Cerberus

[RadicalDisconnect]

Dear haters,

SO BE IT. The cycle continues. :happy:

Love,
Casey and Mac 
Catalyst (Starbrat)

Modifié par RadicalDisconnect, 13 juillet 2012 - 08:06 .

[CptData]

franciscoamell wrote...

Dear Ashley Williams

I'd like the name of your plastic surgeon, your boob job looks pretty good, better than mine at least. Also, where do you bleach skin? Looks so natural!

-Diana Allers

Dear Diana,

I didn't went to a plastic surgeon. I just found a decent push-up bra that makes my B-sized twins to a big C.
And the pretty face is still the same plus some make-up.

Not sure if a plastic surgeon can fix your face.

- Lieutenant Commander Ashley Madeline Williams, second human Spectre.

[CHALET]

Dragon_Claw wrote...

CHALET wrote...

Dear Kelly.

What happened to your face?

Incidently, thanks for looking after my fish and pet varren whilst I'm in here. You sure were keen to look after him. You're a pet person, I respect that... though I barely got a 'goodbye' in between the petting him, but we were all shocked by the whole arrest thing so you're forgiven. 

PS: It's probably just a coincidence but I've been suffering from this awful itch since we hooked up. I think it might just be these crappy Alliance beds or Mordin was trolling me with mini-mini-mini swarmers. Just a thought.

Yours,
Commander Shepard.

Dear Commander Shepard.

Ms. Chambers is in no condition to repley your email.....

Team Firefly
Cerberus

Dear Team Firefly

u wot m8

Sincerely,
Commander Shepard.

[CptData]

OneWomanArmy wrote...

Dear fem shep!

I am sorry I never went any further with my flirting, I wanted to I really wanted to but your boyfriend Kaidan threaten to get me off the normandy if I did. But don't worry, I will make my move soon!

Love from James Vega

Hey Vega,

don't dare to touch my girl.
Yes, this is Kaidan. I have access to my girls PC.

Kaidan

PS. Javik still needs something to throw out of the airlock.

[Xilizhra]

Dear Javik,

Please answer my calls. We have something, I know it; I've heard how you long to be with me, give me so much, and I just want to do the same in return...

Love, the airlock

[Dragon_Claw]

CptData wrote...

OneWomanArmy wrote...

Dear fem shep!

I am sorry I never went any further with my flirting, I wanted to I really wanted to but your boyfriend Kaidan threaten to get me off the normandy if I did. But don't worry, I will make my move soon!

Love from James Vega

Hey Vega,

don't dare to touch my girl.
Yes, this is Kaidan. I have access to my girls PC.

Kaidan

PS. Javik still needs something to throw out of the airlock.

MESSAGES INTERCEPTED

Hello boys.

You are wasting your time.

Jane has already been "checkmated".

Now if you would excuse me, I´m in the mood for a shower...

Comm Specialist Traynor

Modifié par Dragon_Claw, 13 juillet 2012 - 01:29 .

[Dragon_Claw]

Double post

Modifié par Dragon_Claw, 13 juillet 2012 - 01:28 .

[Dragon_Claw]

Sorry, triple post.

Modifié par Dragon_Claw, 13 juillet 2012 - 01:29 .

[Gedgehog]

Dear Javik,

You aren't really a Prothean, I'm onto you Mr Javik, I know that you really are just a mutated Batarian. None of us actually remember subjugating anyone looking like you, we believe you are a cheap and nasty fabrication pretending to be a Prothean.

But if you really are a Prothean, a hideously deformed, ret-conned Prothean, then, HAHA YOU SUCK.

Best Regards,

The Reapers.

P.S, Lol, your race is dead, and I turned your wife into a Collector.

[Hadeedak]

Dragon_Claw wrote...

CptData wrote...

OneWomanArmy wrote...

Dear fem shep!

I am sorry I never went any further with my flirting, I wanted to I really wanted to but your boyfriend Kaidan threaten to get me off the normandy if I did. But don't worry, I will make my move soon!

Love from James Vega

Hey Vega,

don't dare to touch my girl.
Yes, this is Kaidan. I have access to my girls PC.

Kaidan

PS. Javik still needs something to throw out of the airlock.

MESSAGES INTERCEPTED

Hello boys.

You are wasting your time.

Jane has already been "checkmated".

Now if you would excuse me, I´m in the mood for a shower...

Comm Specialist Traynor

Dear Traynor:

While I'm not always clear on human expressions, I do want to remind you that your best chess is no match for giving my girl a really, really big gun that always shoots straight. Enjoy your shower. We'll be down in the main battery, comparing scars and finishing off this bottle.

Courteously,
GV

[Abraham_uk]

CptData wrote...

franciscoamell wrote...

Dear Ashley Williams

I'd like the name of your plastic surgeon, your boob job looks pretty good, better than mine at least. Also, where do you bleach skin? Looks so natural!

-Diana Allers

Dear Diana,

I didn't went to a plastic surgeon. I just found a decent push-up bra that makes my B-sized twins to a big C.
And the pretty face is still the same plus some make-up.

Not sure if a plastic surgeon can fix your face.

- Lieutenant Commander Ashley Madeline Williams, second human Spectre.

Dear Second Human Spectre

We should start a club. Second helpings. For people who don't come first.

Sincerely

Buzz Aldrin Second Man on The Moon.

[Dragon_Claw]

Hadeedak wrote...

Dragon_Claw wrote...

CptData wrote...

OneWomanArmy wrote...

Dear fem shep!

I am sorry I never went any further with my flirting, I wanted to I really wanted to but your boyfriend Kaidan threaten to get me off the normandy if I did. But don't worry, I will make my move soon!

Love from James Vega

Hey Vega,

don't dare to touch my girl.
Yes, this is Kaidan. I have access to my girls PC.

Kaidan

PS. Javik still needs something to throw out of the airlock.

MESSAGES INTERCEPTED

Hello boys.

You are wasting your time.

Jane has already been "checkmated".

Now if you would excuse me, I´m in the mood for a shower...

Comm Specialist Traynor

Dear Traynor:

While I'm not always clear on human expressions, I do want to remind you that your best chess is no match for giving my girl a really, really big gun that always shoots straight. Enjoy your shower. We'll be down in the main battery, comparing scars and finishing off this bottle.

Courteously,
GV

Uhm, guys.

What are you all talking about?!?

This.. This isn´t fair!!! ;-(

I fed her fishes and I bought this stupid dancers outfit from Aria!!!!!

I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!

KrllyGrl

[Gedgehog]

Dear Fem Shep,

if I sleep with you, will you bump me up a rank or two?

Regards,

Vega.

P.S, banged Ashley.

[Dragon_Claw]

Gedgehog wrote...

Dear Fem Shep,

if I sleep with you, will you bump me up a rank or two?

Regards,

Vega.

P.S, banged Ashley.

Sooo basically.

You are asking me for 2 favors?

Commander Jane Shepard

Modifié par Dragon_Claw, 13 juillet 2012 - 07:20 .

[Abraham_uk]

Dragon_Claw wrote...

Gedgehog wrote...

Dear Fem Shep,

if I sleep with you, will you bump me up a rank or two?

Regards,

Vega.

P.S, banged Ashley.

Sooo basically.

You are asking me for 2 favors?

Commander Jane Shepard

Dear Lola

Would I ever do that?
I'm an N7, I'm not going to sully my reputation by sleeping with the comanding officer.
Besides,  I've got Ashley. No offence Lola.

We still bros?
I wanna get this crew assembled for a game of poker.
I've been spending every minute of my free time playing in the Citadel. I've become quite a pro.

Sincerely

Vega

[DirtySHISN0]

 NUDE PICTURES OF THE ILLUSIVE MAN!!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------

From; Cerberus HQ.

Good. You opened this message. This isn't really  nude
pictures of the Illusive man. He is busy counting casualty
reports and designing your new leash.

So you escaped our fight on the citadel. You're not as stupid
as i thought, but never forget your best wasn't good enough
to stop a terminally ill drell. Now an entire galaxy still has
a council because you lacked the strength to win.
The rumor about Kai Leng needs to be re-written. I will be
there for the final chapter. It ends with your rape.

-Shepard