Jack Crapper wrote...
P3G4SU5 wrote...
***OFFICIAL PUBLIC RELEASE BY THE GALACTIC INSTITUTION FOR DRUG CONTROL***
A recent drug named, 'Biagra' has recently been released onto the galactic market. Biagra has NOT passed the official testing required to qualify for commercial sale and is therefore missing key certifications and safety standards.
Testing has shown that Biagra has been found to contain multiple traces harmful substances including 'Red Sand', in addition to other untested substances, including 'Minagen X3' within it's composition.
The GIDC urges all users of Biagra to cease taking the drug immediately and contact their physician at their earliest convenience.
CONTINUED USE MAY RESULT IN INJURY OR DEATH.
Dear Sir,
We have had this issue with the GIDC before, and the same mistake has been made in the past. Inspector Travester of the GIDC, Goddess bless him, has a tendency to misspell the cheap Taiwanese knock off, "Biogra," as "Biagra."
We have accreditation by 3rd party labs, showing there are no illicit substances in our product. It has also been proven that our product is non addictive, meaning there could not be any Red Sand in it. The side effects of using Red Sand are also very noticeable and have, of course, never been reported with use of our product.
Our marketing program has taken a hiatus, as we are concentrating our efforts towards the war. You have seen the military implement our refined product, allowing greater use of Singularity and new and improved Warp Ammo. Biotic Charge is now more effective than ever, with increased force against any target from even the lesser powerful vanguards.
Please give Mr Travester our regards.
Biagra
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***FROM THE GALACTIC INSTITUTION FOR DRUG CONTROL***
*********************************************************************Regarding your last communication; the labs listed in your offically submitted documentation are not recognised by any galactic council bodies and therefore can not be regarded as reputable references of product testing.
Labs located in the Batarian Hegemony have been found to neglect the testing of products, lacking the comprehensive tests critical to ensure drugs are safe prior to commercialisation. Two of the three labs listed were under investigation for negligence in practice prior to your product release. The third lab upon inspection by our investigators actually turned out to be a breeding farm for Space Cows on Ontarom which was overrun with pyjaks. It is hardly worth stating that such a facility was barely capable of pasteurising space cow milk, let alone performing biochemical tests and analyses. Furthermore, due to the loss of Khar'shan, authentication of the results promoted from the former two labs will not be possible in the near future and are considered unsubstantiated.
Thorough testing by the GIDC has shown that the increase in power and duration experienced by biotic users is in fact only an initial phase. This phase is followed by a rapid decline in biotic potential. The decline is also accompanied with mental instability, often coupled with illusions of grandeur (please see attached study of patient No.341 who insisted on being called by his title of "Biotic God").
Whilst there is no denying the initial benefit to biotic users, the long term effects render biotic combatants unable to perform their duties and protect their allies under combat conditions. Singularities lose capture range and priming capability after only 3-4 uses, whilst biotic charge users suffer from confusion and dizziness becoming unable charge on targets. Shockwaves are reduced to what can only be described as 'biotic wind'. In conclusion this drug is unfit for military use and has already been withdrawn from all active personnel.
Unfortunately I am unable to relay you regards to former Inspector Travester as he has been relieved from his duties. Former Inspector Travester was found unconscious on Omega after self administering a cocktail of illicit substances. He is currently pending charges for falsifying documents relating to a number of recently released, high profile drugs including Biagra. We have also discovered that the former inspector had been receiving large payments from an as of yet unknown source. Volus accountants are currently investigating this matter on our behalf. You may find it illuminating to know that doctors also found exceptionally high amounts of Biagra in his system.
As you know we are currently in a state of war and as such any person(s) endorsing substances which impair the performance of our soldiers at such a critical time are to be considered hostile agents. Continued promotion or sale of this product is illegal in Council space under galactic law and will result in the immediate incarceration of any individuals related to it's distribution or sale.
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Modifié par P3G4SU5, 20 novembre 2012 - 11:16 .
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