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[CREinstein]

No not the dragon, the original!!!! I blame a certain blood mage!

[KnightofPhoenix]

We are back and now it's time we met Iona!
http://img689.images...09120509204.jpg

An elf with class is a rarity. An elf with class and is appropriately beautiful is even rarer. That's Iona! Being Lady Landra's lady in waiting, she is adorned with noble clothing, fine perfum and eyes that make you want to kiss them, as sick as that may sound. In addition, she is elegant and eloquent in her speech, and has eyes that make you want to hug them. Heck, she might be the perfect elf, one with eyes that make you want to just grab them and..and...I mentioned the eyes before didn't I?

Anyways, despite her youth, she has a daughter, which makes her a milf. That might seem weird to you. Coupled with her innocent look, her youth and her height, you might be asking yourself whether you are doing something wrong. That's until you hit the bed and screw your doubts, pardon the pun. Despite everything, Iona isn't exactly innocent. She likes to get the attention of noblemen, or women. One such lucky guy was Cousland's youngest. He is like the luckiest guy alive. I wish I was him during the very same night he is with Iona... 

Anyways, without further adue, please welcome Iona!

"Iona, please take a seat and make your self comfortable, it's a pleasure to have you here"
Iona: "The pleasure is all mine sir"
"Sir?....that's the first time I was called that *sniff*...Thank you"
Iona: "You are quite welcome".
"So, Iona, tell us about your eyes..ah I mean your life".
Iona: "Well I caught the attention of Landy Landra years ago, so she took me in and I became her lady in waiting. She always treated me well. And I have a little daughter as you surely know, the pearl of my life, Amerythine".
"That's a beautiful eye...uh name. So where is your girl now?"
Iona: "She is in the alienage".
"Wait, why isn't she living in Landra's estate like you?"
Iona: "I have been asking myself that question and I don't know the answer".
"This is preposterous! No knife ear kid of Iona is going to live in the Alienage under my watch!"
Iona: "You just called my daughter a knife ear, sir".
"Yea I did!...wait...I did? I am so sorry. Past habits. But time is wasting! You guard over there...yea I am talking to you...go to the Derenim Alienage and bring Iona's daughter here."
Guard: "Why, she going to compete boss?"
 "She is under-age you sick freak! Now go and tell them I sent you. Fret not my dear, your daughter  will be brought to you in a few moments."
Iona: "Oh thank you, kind sir. How can I ever repay you?"
"Weeeellllll....now that you mention it....."
Iona: "Are you noble by any chance? Do you have noble blood I mean"
"Eum yea I do actually. I am the nephew of a Bann."
Iona: *changes tone of voice* "Then I know just the thing. But I will have to give it to you....in private."
".....deal! Euh I mean...I would be delighted to see that which you seek to show me, in the peace and quiet of my room. And now our interview is over. And I still got it!"

As I was saying ladies and gents, I no longer envy Cousland's youngest. Ha, in fact I am pretty sure his life is going to turn into hell soon. Eherm. But stay tuned, for we have more! For we are recieving the Lady of the Forest herself! After the break. A very long break....very. *runs to his room*.  

Modifié par KnightofPhoenix, 01 janvier 2010 - 12:46 .

[Kohaku]

Eye fantasies! I hate to say this but I remember reading this one hentai where this guy had an obsession with this girl's eyes. Needless to say he cut them out... and it got bizarre.Good on you to not have a collection of eyes!

[KnightofPhoenix]

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

Eye fantasies! I hate to say this but I remember reading this one hentai where this guy had an obsession with this girl's eyes. Needless to say he cut them out... and it got bizarre.Good on you to not have a collection of eyes!

Hentai?...I am afraid I have no idea what you are talking about
And that story is cetainly not something I would want to...read.

[KnightofPhoenix]

CREinstein wrote...

uh oh, is that Andraste trying to enter the show?

We sent Kolgrim her way so he can distract her. You don't want to know how. He was always weird that one.  

[CREinstein]

She's singing!

[KnightofPhoenix]

CREinstein wrote...

She's singing!

Oh you mean the woman, not the dragon?

Well, consider this. Do you seriously expect me to show her off in front of everyone in Ferelden, make her wear a bikini and maybe even flirt with her, while she is married to the Maker?
Ha, I might be reckless, but I am not suicidal.

[CREinstein]

The Maker left long ago!

[KnightofPhoenix]

CREinstein wrote...

The Maker left long ago!

And Andraste is a pile of ashes now. Plus, we don't have a picture of her.

[Euteras]

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

Eye fantasies! I hate to say this but I remember reading this one hentai where this guy had an obsession with this girl's eyes. Needless to say he cut them out... and it got bizarre.Good on you to not have a collection of eyes!

Remonds me of this girl from Orlais. Fortunately it wasn't the eyeball she collected.

[TanithAeyrs]

LOL this thread is great. Poor Zevran, he is so disappointed with only placating the contestants and dealing with the Anora's secret service (hammer repair I understand). Give Zev a chance, he can give some great hairstyling advice.

[KnightofPhoenix]

TanithAeyrs wrote...

LOL this thread is great. Poor Zevran, he is so disappointed with only placating the contestants and dealing with the Anora's secret service (hammer repair I understand). Give Zev a chance, he can give some great hairstyling advice.

Once I am done with presenting the contestants, I think I will make a speciale with judge commentary. Zevran could be a judge, alongside Oghren, Loghain, Teagan, Sten and the poetic tree if I am feeling poetic.

[XOGHunter246]

I vote include the Dragon as she is female but be warned that the show will end with the Dragon winning.

[mrofni]

Actually, I've changed my mind. Adraste should be allowed to enter. All hail Andraste and her maker!



*Votes for Adraste, reincarnated*

[XOGHunter246]

I thinks Mithra should be in it

[KnightofPhoenix]

We don't know how she looks like.

[XOGHunter246]

She the Dalish elf hunter that stands in entrance to camp she has a yellow name.

[KnightofPhoenix]

XOGHunter246 wrote...

She the Dalish elf hunter that stands in entrance to camp she has a yellow name.

I was talking about Andraste.
And Mithra is ugly and has the only bad voice acting in the entire game!

[mrofni]

KnightofPhoenix wrote...

We don't know how she looks like.

Yes we do. All Hail Andraste!

Modifié par mrofni, 01 janvier 2010 - 04:07 .

[KnightofPhoenix]

No dragons allowed. She wouldn't fit in the studio.

[Kohaku]

Speciesism! Dragons are women too. Big women. Strong women. Women with a point to prove!

[KnightofPhoenix]

Women with no boobs. Apparently no happy spot either, or it's too concealed. Can't wear a bikini. Infact, they are already naked and I don't feel a thing. What's the point of having her on?

[mrofni]

You allowed Anora on, and she can't wear a bikini with that giant dick of hers... See Mister Ferelden 2009. If you don't allow Andraste, I demand you disqualify Anora!

[KnightofPhoenix]

At least Anora has boobs! Boobs!

[mrofni]

Come on. We know you've always wanted a girl with a tail. Admit it.