759 réponses à ce sujet

[KnightofPhoenix]

Taleroth wrote...

Has anyone pointed out that it's 2010, yet? Because I'd love to be the obnoxious one to do so.

I did, in the Lady of the Forest interview:
"Now we continue to present our contestants for Miss Ferleden 2009! And yes we realise that it's no longer 2009, so don't bother."

Modifié par KnightofPhoenix, 07 janvier 2010 - 03:27 .

[ReubenLiew]

Taleroth wrote...

Has anyone pointed out that it's 2010, yet? Because I'd love to be the obnoxious one to do so.

*shakes fist*
Cheeky git!

[Thoron Draugohtar]

KnightofPhoenix wrote...

@ Elys. The darkspawn do not take the idea of their mommy be shown to the world with much enthusiasm I am afraid.

Hahaha this was ace, cheers, I havent laughed so much for ages.
________

What about nameless blonde that was being unsuccessfully chatted up by Daveth at Ostagar?

She never spoke but was in a cutscene

[KnightofPhoenix]

jojojordmeister wrote...
What about nameless blonde that was being unsuccessfully chatted up by Daveth at Ostagar?

She never spoke but was in a cutscene

sigh...she reminds me too much of Daveth *sniff*.....I can't do it

[KnightofPhoenix]

And now ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our final contestant, Shale!
http://www.thereview...n_age_shale.jpg

You may ask yourself, why the hell is a golem here? I will tell you why you ignorant fool. That's because golems were once dwarves who volunteered to become steel contraptions, to save your ugly ass. Shale, a female dwarf, was one such volunteer. And that's why, to honor her servcies and sacrifice, we decided to bring her to the show. If you have a problem with that, then you are probably a pansy who hates our troops and hates our freedom! Support the Golems!! *Patriotic music in the background*

Anyways, Shale hails from the house of Cadash before becomig a golem. Then she was owned by a mage who mistreated her until he was killed in an accident, destroying her command rod in the process. Poor Shale was forced to be a statue in some unknown forsaken village before she was found. Naturally, this means she hates mages. But her true phobia is against birds. Feathers, poo from above. All these things generate volatile emotional reactions that seem strange for a golem.

Anyways, here's Shale!
*Shale sits down, but breaks the chair*
Shale: "Pidgeon crap!"
"haha oh I am sorry. It seems that the chairs are too light."
Shale: "It impresses me with its remarkable grasp of the obvious. I suppose I shall have to remain standing up like a statue in front of it. Uggh"
"Eum, I will stand up too. So Shale. What did you feel when you discovered that you were a dwarf and a girl?"
Shale: "Disbelief. Disgust. Depression. But relief at the same time. Relief that I am no longer a flesh creature like it. Especially like it ewww. And I am a golem, ergo a vastly superior construct, gender means nothing to me. That's what I keep telling flesh creatures, but they insist on seeing me as a girl. That's until I crush their heads."
"I see. So you felt nothing at all knowing that you are a girl? Isn't there someone you like?"
Shale: "Baah! Why would a golem like an inferior creature made of disgusting liquids and flesh that rot like garbage?" 
"So what would you do if a guy wants to...get to know you better?"
Shale: "Oh I will be delighted to let it know more about me. My favorite hobby is to grab the heads of humans and squeeze them like a giant lemon. Sqquuiishhh"
"You do realise that some humans might be...aroused by such a statement?"
Shale: "What? Why would a human be excited by his head being crushed? And just when I thought humans can't get any worse! How naive I turned out to be."
"You really hate humans, don't you?
Shale: "How did it notice? Your genius makes me see hope in humanity....idiot."
"Oh, I see, well....SHALE LOOK OUT A BIRD!!!"
Shale: "WHERE!?!?! Take cover!!! Die feathery beast!!!" *keeps looking around*
"hahahaha"
Shale: "It must think it's very funny. Ha. Ha. Ha."
"Haha priceless, but ok I am sorry...wait...seriously there is a bird on your shoulder."
Shale: "It thinks it can fool me twice? It thinks I am human?"
"Shale, seriously, there is a bird on your back. I swear!"
Shale: "Right"
"Shale I am serious and..look it just flew off and...and...there is something white on your shoulder..."
Shale: "......*looks at his shoulder*.....Pidgeon......crrraaaapppp!!!! *faints*"
"Wow, someone please escort Shale back to her room and give her a bath...actually, I will give her a bath just get her ready hehe"

So folks, we met the strangely cute Shale, our final contestant!
But before we begin the election, we will be meeting the judges, which are:
Teagan, Loghain, Sten, Oghren, Zevran and the poet tree!
They will each say one sentence about each contestant, after we return. Stay tuned!

Modifié par KnightofPhoenix, 07 janvier 2010 - 07:38 .

[Kohaku]

It's funny because I read the whole thing with Shale's voice in my mind and it worked. XD

[KnightofPhoenix]

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

It's funny because I read the whole thing with Shale's voice in my mind and it worked. XD

lol I actually spoke like Shale out loud while writing it haha

[Sialater]

You know... I was going to post, "Shale Rocks!" But then I realized the pun police would have to arrest me for a crime against humanity.

[Tirigon]

It would be funny if I wasn´t in a bad mood on account of recent public reactions towards fun. Sometimes I soooo understand Shale´s wish to crush heads... Probably that´s why I get along with her.

[Bhatair]

I'm so excited!

Too excited... apparently..

I need to be alone! >.>

[Quientus]

This contest is rigged !!!

Anyone with just a grain of sense, can see that Shale will win this hands down ...

...

Because if not, lets face it ... - She will go rampant on the Judges ... and squish their heads in ...

[Tirigon]

Quientus wrote...

This contest is rigged !!!

Anyone with just a grain of sense, can see that Shale will win this hands down ...

...

Because if not, lets face it ... - She will go rampant on the Judges ... and squish their heads in ...

SOME of us *point at myself* would consider this a reason NOT to vote for Shale, hehe....

Edit: Besides, the many people in the Shianni Adoration society will go on rampage if Shianni doesn´t win.
Would you rather fight a single golem or 20 wardens, each of whom has killed thousands of foes already?

Modifié par Tirigon, 07 janvier 2010 - 09:51 .

[Quientus]

Tirigon wrote...

Quientus wrote...

This contest is rigged !!!

Anyone with just a grain of sense, can see that Shale will win this hands down ...

...

Because if not, lets face it ... - She will go rampant on the Judges ... and squish their heads in ...

SOME of us *point at myself* would consider this a reason NOT to vote for Shale, hehe....

Edit: Besides, the many people in the Shianni Adoration society will go on rampage if Shianni doesn´t win.
Would you rather fight a single golem or 20 wardens, each of whom has killed thousands of foes already?

That depends ... - Are those Wardens you are referring to all females  ? Because if so ... I'm sure we can come to some form of agreements ... *grins*

Besides ... It is my fervent hope that Shale regains her once, mortal form at some point ... I mean ... How can you not like her ? ... haha

[Herr Uhl]

Tirigon wrote...
Edit: Besides, the many people in the Shianni Adoration society will go on rampage if Shianni doesn´t win.
Would you rather fight a single golem or 20 wardens, each of whom has killed thousands of foes already?

You know that your hopes are in vain. Dagna is too damn cute not to win.

[Tirigon]

Quientus wrote...

That depends ... - Are those Wardens you are referring to all females  ? Because if so ... I'm sure we can come to some form of agreements ... *grins*

Besides ... It is my fervent hope that Shale regains her once, mortal form at some point ... I mean ... How can you not like her ? ... haha

I like Shale, but that doesn´t mean she needs to win, because I love Shianni! And she certainly looks better.

And no, the wardens are NOT all female. We have both genders, some heterosexual, some ******, some bi, and all races.

[Quientus]

Besides, Ser Cauthrien already made a proposal to me that I simply could *not* refuse ...

So my vote goes to her ... - Sorry Shale ...

*ducks*

"Look out Shale !!!" 


Shianni is cute though, just not cute enough ... *grins*

Modifié par Quientus, 07 janvier 2010 - 10:04 .

[Tirigon]

Quientus wrote...

Shianni is cute though, just not cute enough ... *grins*

Sacrilege! Damned heathen! Back away, my friend, or Shianni will hit you with her bottle!
(and I´ll hold you so she doesn´t miss:devil:)

Modifié par Tirigon, 07 janvier 2010 - 10:06 .

[Kohaku]

I said Dagna damn it! She likes my hugs!

[Quientus]

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

I said Dagna damn it! She likes my hugs!

I agree Dagna is cute too ... - Actually cuteR (!) than Shianna (*grins evilly*) ...

BUT she is way too short and "buff" for me (my character) to take a (romantic) liking to her ...

[Rostas7]

Leliana... MARMELADE!

[Tirigon]

Shianni is simply the most beautiful woman in Ferelden. Actually, she even is the most beautiful man in Ferelden, too. Though she is not as such a man. Not according to ... certain body parts.



End of discussion.

[Herr Uhl]

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

I said Dagna damn it! She likes my hugs!

Who doesn't?

[Quientus]

*Wanders off, looking for a "Ser Cauthrien Adoration Group" ...*

I would have absolute loved if it were possible to get her ... I mean get her to join as a Grey Warden ...

What a group that would be !

Ser Cauthrien as the Tank !!! - Just imagine !!!

Modifié par Quientus, 07 janvier 2010 - 10:34 .

[Kohaku]

Herr Uhl wrote...

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

I said Dagna damn it! She likes my hugs!

Who doesn't?

Andraste. She ran when I tried to hug her. She said I was the scariest chick in Ferelden.

[Herr Uhl]

Kerridan Kaiba wrote...

Herr Uhl wrote...
Who doesn't?

Andraste. She ran when I tried to hug her. She said I was the scariest chick in Ferelden.

But Andraste is a poo-head. Thus she does not count.