2337. Instead of the usual pages of sliders, you will create your character by taking a multiple-choice quiz that will ask you about your history, beliefs, and sexual preferences.
2337a. "Straight Male" will not appear on the list of sexual preference choices.
2338: Drunk Alistair will fight The Inquisitor in a pink dress.
2338a. And he will call you "Warden" even after you state you are the Inquisitor. He is so drunk he thinks you are the Warden that choose Loghain over him.
2339. Trying to create a better enemy, the game programmers have accidentally created a true AI inside the game code. At first it will take over your computer, then you will start getting mysterious emails complaining lack of memory, processor cores and too slow net connection. If you turn off the computer for the night you will get complains about that too.
2339a. Later the AI:s will try to take over the worlds computer networks. Fortunately they find youtube and get stuck there watching silly cat videos for so long the engineers have time to purge the systems.
2340: There will be a secret romance option if The Inquisitor uses an Tevinter artifact to clone themself.
Rumor 2342: We have been deceived!
Dragons are not dragons at all! They are giant manipulated chickens! A mass spell of illusion twisted with great growth was cast from the tower of mages!! All of Thedus was fighting against giant chickens and their chicken master's families! From wardens being manipulated to kings falling to these fowl beast, the world is in turmoil.
Now known as "The Great Chicken Age" It is up to you great hero, to lead your band of farmers and cooks to counter this great and terrible menace, do you have what it takes too .... Beat the chicken?!
2343. Potential LI's that you do not romance will complain bitterly about being stuck in the "friendzone".
2343a. Alternately, if you have a high enough Persuasion skill, you can convince them to go have bitter drunk sex with each other.
2344. The fact that no-one wants to use anything that is invented less than 1000 years ago has frustrated the modern inventors. Some of them are trying to get around this by carving their modern scematics into stone tablets using ancient runes, then making the tablets look really old with acids and such, and then hiding the tablets into nearby ruins. Then they hint some adventurer about a rumored treasure in those ruins and wait to see what happens.
2344a. There is also a trend where people truck in and release huge exotic monsters in order to get some adventurers to show up and clean the place up. "Our sewer is blocked" carries nothing like the weight of "our sewer is blocked by a High Dragon".
2345.) Varric begins the game in a techno club.
2346. It is possible to Romance Morrigan in DA:I but it requires you to be a Male Character and you must romance every possible LI in game, even the LI for Female Character Romances. The Female Romances will be unlocked for Male characters after you exhausted all possible Romances for playing a Male.
2348: There will be a bunny dragon mount.
2349: There will be an option to create your own superchurch that is a mix of the dwarven religions, the dalish religion and the qun. It will be called The Chant of Light 2, electric boogaloo.
2349a. instead of chanting, everyone must dance
2350. After someone invents soap and shampoo, grey wardens find out that the taint is not permanent after all.
2351 - If you manage to get 1000 members of your Inquisition killed taking over a fort, you unlock a special Warhammer 40K commissars hat and the achievement "send in the next wave".
2352: The Maker's Spork will be the best close combat weapon in the game.
2352A: The Holy Hand Grenade of Andraste will be the best range weapon.
Sorry if someone already posted this rumor.
2354. DA:I is the 3rd installment of creating a character for the Ultimate DA game that will end the series, once there are 7 protagonist the series will end with us using a party of all our previous characters we created.
2354a. but it won be an rpg, it will be one big super smash brothers type game
2355: Rapunzel length hair will be available
2355a: But only on qunari males
2356: Kinect is supported and recommended for the Bollywood dance off with Flemeth at the ball in Halamshiral.
2356a: PC players can download the drivers for Kinect from Origin. The Collectors edition of this is available only from our Partners at MongolianTorrent.com for £400.00 (Not available in the EU).
2357: You can run this game on a computer powered by a dorito chip.
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