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[PsychoBlonde]

1611.  In other news, sudden Thedas-wide suspender shortage.  Flat-ass guys in despair.

[DarthSliver]

1612. In inquisition we will find out the Fade is actually another dimension that only Magic users can conquer and that the Demons are actually Aliens.

[Iron Fist]

1612. In inquisition we will find out the Fade is actually another dimension that only Magic users can conquer and that the Demons are actually Aliens.

 

There's a Highlander 2 joke somewhere in here...

[Gamercat]

1613. The tides turn in the final battle when the inquisitor unleashes her/his secret weapon. TIE fighters!

[Iron Fist]

1614. There's a side quest involving getting nugs out of trees.

 

1615. There's a side quest involving parcel delivery (specifically a book of naughty drawings between two lovers).

 

1616. The reward for each is a pet nug and a drawing of your choosing (based on a description alone).

 

1617. The pet nug has a scripted death and the drawing is inaccessible (except as a gift to your LI).

[mousestalker]

1618. Because of the controversy surrounding both the DAO and DA2 depictions of darkspawn, Bioware has sprung for a famous fantasy artist to make the models for DAI. Rich Burlew will be drawing all the darkspawn.

[Gamercat]

1619. There will be a scene involving the inquisitor and companions climbing a mountain and it will be almost Identical to this. 

[Brass_Buckles]

1620.  A new, unannounced playable race will be revealed on the release date:  Duncan's Beard.  It will be a disembodied beard with a monocle as a potential accessory, and it will have a skill tree related to jumping from NPC to NPC, allowing the player to enjoy a large range of playstyles.  The Duncan's Beard race has no gender officially but should be presumed male, even when attached to a female NPC.

[Dominus]

1621. If the unconfirmed rumor list hits over 9000, A West Side Story Side Quest will be added. Both Tony and Maria are recruitable companions.

[Brass_Buckles]

1622.  Due to budget cuts, all Inquisitors will be equipped with variants of the mage robes, retextured to look like different armors.  Each class has five varieties per race.  The rest of the budget was spent on making awesome hats.

[Gamercat]

1623. The inquisition nearly goes bankrupt due to Isabella's new buisness endevor. Call 1-800-Apostatutes for a naughty good time.

[Brass_Buckles]

1624.  Midway through the game, Thedas is invaded by the Collectors.  The Inquisitor must gather a party and gain their loyalty to fight back against this threat and prepare for the coming Reaper invasion.

 

1624a. The Reapers have discovered a means of Indoctrinating darkspawn and Old Gods.

[BouncyFrag]

1625. Bioware will team up with The Witcher 3 devs, Cdprojekt, to create a cross-game multiplayer mode so each respective group of fanboys can settle their issues online in full combat. Less DAI/TW3 flame wars on the forums will usher in a new era of peace and progress for all living creatures.

 

1625 a. Those who choose to enter into this arena will suffer great consequences should they loose. Witcher fan's love making scenes in TW3 will have the...um...participants in their underwear for the duration for the scene. Should a Dragon Age supporter loose, all possible love interests in DAI will have the face and voice of Geralt of Rivia.

[Shadow of Light Dragon]

1626. A new 'moderate' outlook will be provided by Wardens who prefer the middle ground and aim for compromise. This will include such dialogue options as 'Hey, why don't we let Loghain live long enough to help command the army, but *not* make him a Grey Warden?', 'Look, the culprit is standing right there. We all saw him. Execute him and leave the rest of the mages alone,' and 'No need to make a big deal about this, guys, we can order a half-and-half pizza, ok?'

[darkness4ever]

1626. There will be a barber shop, so players can change hairstyle from time to time. In addition, the inquisidor helmet wont be removable by any mean once equipped, not even in "that" kind of scenes. Your character starts off wearing it.

1627. A griffonn day 1 dlc will be released, though it will affect just the warden's cameo, along with hawke riding a nug.

1628. There will be a timer on every dialogue, also the option to knock out people you're talking with, given you lack the right answer or you're not so sure about what to say, being able to return after making your mind up like nothing happened. Specially in romance dialogues.

1629. First day will be released a baby dragon pet dlc, specially deadly, to replace the standar nug obligatory pet that eats gold from fallen enemies, if the fallen enemy happen to not have any money, it will eat yours.

1630. Every pc romance scene will be played out by a couple of noisy dwarfs having sex, no matter which race you choose, or what companion you're romancing with at the time. The scene will also play out of nowhere at random places along the game for no apparent reason.

1631. To simplify matters even more, every radial dialogue options will be replaced by three Sandal's face emotes, according to your mood and alignment. The dialogue and outcomes will be all same, but slightly changing the anger or happiness in both the pc and npc's voices.

1632. Due to a failed enchantment, there willl be three Sandals now, each one looking exactly the same, being also potential companions, following you around as they talk the whole time by just saying "enchanment" repeatedly. Also including the slightly angry "enchantment" warcry.

1633. Depending on your companions' approval, there will be a chance of betrayal or sacrifice at the end. Synthesis will be an option as well.

1634. The "Maker" will be, in fact, a glowing version of Sandal.

1635. The main game experience will be based on fortress economy management. Most fortress will play and look the same.

1636. Cheese will replace mana potions, mana potions will replace healing potions, healing potions will replace Cheese and so on.

1637. Leliana's nug pet turns out to be Flemeth at the end. The ending will be a view of the nug as the camera zoom in into his eyes, but 'cause it almost doesn't have any eyes, it wil zoom in into one of his ears. Then the credits.

1638. There will be Veil portals much like Oblivion's gates from TES :IV In fact they'll the same Oblivion's planes but recolored in green.

1639. Gameplay mechanics will be based on three buttons, attack, dodge, and awesome finisher, which will be performed by filling the awesome bar up. To do so, you have stay put as the enemies hit your character.

1640. To keep players away from combat tactics development, Dragon Age Inquisition will be twice as spammy as before with DA:II, even walking around will require you to spam buttons.

1641. Combat and tactic mechanics will go as far as with Mass Effect 3. Cover system will be implemented.

1642. There is gonna be at least three ways to solve every quest. Which will result in your character killing your target with the knife, a fork or a slice of cheese.

1643. Every character' stats will come from armor sets, many of the coolest ones will be via DLC only, or via grinding mobs. Leveling up will envolve your character aging and getting weaker, which will encourage player to purchace such DLCs.

1644. Real money auction house will be implemented, a "possible" multiplayer mode as well as a new DLC class "the monk" which will play exactly as thewarrior, but without weapons, your character needs to be bold in order to become one, but it won't matter mostly 'cause the inquisitor helmet isn't gonna be removable.

1645. Every resting camp will look exactly the same no matter where you're, this scenery will be also re-used as many times as humanly possible on combat places, on prologue, at ending, just by setting the starting point on different places of the same area. No one will notice.

1646. You'll be able to play tower defense with your captured fortress.

1647. There will be a dlc's talking sword, which can be found into the sewers. The sword will be voiced by Morgan Freeman and it'll play the rol of a psychologist, helping the player to find out his/her inner self. It wont be romanceable though, since most inquisitors might be end up dying in the process.

1648. Chain Lightning spell will be as useful as it was at enemies' hands back then on DAO, but it will coast three times as much as any other spell in DA:I, making mana usage barely impossible or so they'll say, in fact there won't be any mana involved. Every talent and/or magic spell will require the awesome bar, which will make mage classes impposible to use. Bioware will excuse themselves with "we're trying to appeal to the hard-core fans"

1649. Shale will have her cameo as well, plus a non-free dlc "chicken gift" which you can choose to give her as a present. After Shale smashes the chicken, your Inquisitor will make Shepard's horror face and that's it. For only 2,99 dollars the single chicken.


Apologies for my english, it isn't my first language.
 

[superdeathdealer14]

1650. Bianca is replaced with a dubstep gun.

[CybAnt1]

Apologies for my english, it isn't my first language.
 

 

Maybe, but some of your items made me laugh a lot harder than others posted by people for whom that it is the case. 

[Dio Demon]

Maybe, but some of your items made me laugh a lot harder than others posted by people for whom that it is the case. 

The cheese ones were the best.

 

1651: Learning from Dragon's Dogma and in an attempt to please majority of fans Dragon Age Inquisition's romance system will be very similar to Dragon's Dogma. So you'll be able to romance everyone... including Nugs.

[PsychoBlonde]

1652.  Larry, Darryl, and Darryl have chosen DA:I to be the first stop on their comeback tour.  They have security teams now and will not be signing autographs.

1653.  Rumors abound of a dreaded singing red dragon that turns out, on further inspection, to be Deekin.

1654.  Kobolds quickly added to the list of possible races.

[TheLittleBird]

1655. The party hub (like the party camp in Origins) is the Black City in the Fade, which turns out to be an oversized version of the Pearl from Denerim, with Ogres being the ones 'entertaining' the guests.

[Brass_Buckles]

1656.  All the "horses" in the game will actually be modeled as dwarves, elves, or qunari wearing a horse costume.

[TheLittleBird]

1567. During boss battles, the battled bosses will scream "Turn off your pc or console now! Player spare me!" when they are about to die.

[themikefest]

1568. You learn that the new Viscount in Kirkwall is Hawke's uncle, Gamlen

[TheLittleBird]

1569. Sandal's traditional "slaughter-and-I-am-the-only-one-left-standing" scene will be on top of the White Spire. Around him the player will find thousands of dead nugs. A frozen High Dragon will hang from the building.

[Brass_Buckles]

1660.  Your Inquisitor will be able to become the High King of Skyri--I mean Thedas.