85 réponses à ce sujet

[sandboxgod]

ice skating, haha good one.

[Grinch57]

I'm taking care of two nephews this week and part of next week, while their parents spend 10 days in Spain. Him on business, her doing site seeing. So, I was escorting the boys to school, time was limited and it would be mission fail if they didn't get there before the bell.

As we approached the intersection across from the school, the crossing guard stuck her arms out to the side. I suddenly realized, she was a phantom. I didn't have an Acolyte or a Scorpion on me and I wasn't specced for biotic charge, so I was forced to heavy melee her. I was surprised she went down so fast, I've never tried that before, except as a Paladin.

Well, both boys got delivered to school on time, so it all worked out.

[bondiboy]

You should treat lil Liara better..

[MearasNZ]

Jack, I feel your pain. I work in an office; we are a bunch of administrators in a medical setting. Lately, I have been getting some strange looks from my co-workers and I know that my obsession and addiction to ME3 MP is causing game events to spill over into my real life.

Why, just this morning, one of the electricians was changing a fluorescent bulb above my desk, and when he turned the light off, I shrieked at him, "NO! We must stay within the circle of light! Get back in the light! FINISH!" There was a lot of head shaking and tsk-tsking.

Yesterday, I don't know what came over me, but I decided to hack into some military computers. I roared at my co-workers that they should stay near the computer until the hack was completed, but no, they ran all over the show, knocking things down and maiming innocent bystanders in their panic to get away from me, so fearful were they.

Last Monday, I spotted a thermos in the hallway, in a completely random spot. I vaulted over the guardrail and knelt down beside it, spinning around on one knee, looking in every direction, expecting someone to come running for the thermos at any moment. The security guards did come running and I panicked because there was nobody around to draw their attention away from me, and I had forgotten my cloak that day. It did not end well.

I don't know what to do, I am at my wit's end. I'm starting to really believe that I am a crusader on the side of good; an acolyte keeping the faith; a little piranha swimming among the bigger fish; a saber-toothed tiger prowling the wilds; a hurricane of fury fighting against the evils that would beseige our galaxy; a predator, a preying mantis in the concrete jungle; an avenger for those who cannot fight for themselves. But am I really only a locust?

Help me, Jack Crappernobi. You might just be my only hope.

[Learn To Love Yourself]

Rudest wrote...

Full recovery from the Kishok to the knee! I had to use all my medigel and ops packs, but at least I won't need a prosthesis. I do however have some shocking and terrible news.

I think my neighbor might be part of an undercover Cerberus cell. As I left my apartment to go pick up some soda, she vacuum grabbed me ---- much like a phantom would, which is the core of my suspicion --- yet instead of impaling me with a katana she proceeded to employ a much more destitute soul siphoning weapon; she ranted endlessly about her life, the neighbors lives, and before I knew she had stolen 15 minutes of my life. 15. 15 that I could have been using to play ME3. This new Cerberus weapon is....

Diabolical.

Good God.  A vacuum grab with dire consequences and no decency of a Phantom crotch rub... the darkest of days are upon us. 

Here, friend, you deserve it *hands Rudest stairs*.  This will prevent you from being vacuumed ever again.

[Learn To Love Yourself]

MearasNZ wrote...

Jack, I feel your pain. I work in an office; we are a bunch of administrators in a medical setting. Lately, I have been getting some strange looks from my co-workers and I know that my obsession and addiction to ME3 MP is causing game events to spill over into my real life.

Why, just this morning, one of the electricians was changing a fluorescent bulb above my desk, and when he turned the light off, I shrieked at him, "NO! We must stay within the circle of light! Get back in the light! FINISH!" There was a lot of head shaking and tsk-tsking.

Yesterday, I don't know what came over me, but I decided to hack into some military computers. I roared at my co-workers that they should stay near the computer until the hack was completed, but no, they ran all over the show, knocking things down and maiming innocent bystanders in their panic to get away from me, so fearful were they.

Last Monday, I spotted a thermos in the hallway, in a completely random spot. I vaulted over the guardrail and knelt down beside it, spinning around on one knee, looking in every direction, expecting someone to come running for the thermos at any moment. The security guards did come running and I panicked because there was nobody around to draw their attention away from me, and I had forgotten my cloak that day. It did not end well.

I don't know what to do, I am at my wit's end. I'm starting to really believe that I am a crusader on the side of good; an acolyte keeping the faith; a little piranha swimming among the bigger fish; a saber-toothed tiger prowling the wilds; a hurricane of fury fighting against the evils that would beseige our galaxy; a predator, a preying mantis in the concrete jungle; an avenger for those who cannot fight for themselves. But am I really only a locust?

Help me, Jack Crappernobi. You might just be my only hope.

Somewhere in my mind, there is an inkling of sense telling me that there is something wrong here.  However, my full hearted approval of what you've done only reveals to me how far I have fallen. 

I feel only the need to call your coworkers PUG (the ugliest of dogs) noobs for not having the decency to cover you in your dire need of camaraderie in a series of crucial situations.

The line becomes so blurry between fantasy and reality, it is nigh impossible to distinguish which is which.

I went to a national park with my family one weekend, and the park rangers had an endangered wildlife show off of an exit between N6 and N8 somewhere.  I forget which exit it was.  They held the show at their headquarters, the Ranger National Guild building.  The impressive Commendation board which made up the front wall exhibited how decorated these heroic men and women were.  The first animal they brought out was the symbolic and majestic Bald Eagle. 

I somehow felt enraged to see this Eagle emerge from behind the Commendation board from the RNG building.  It was almost like quadruple deja vu of a past traumatic experience.  I lept up, grabbed the Eagle by the neck, violently shaking it and repeatedly screaming it was useless and unwelcomed.  I then slam dunked it into the nearest recycling bin, a recycling bin for glass.  Lots of broken glass.  A two handed slam dunk.

The worst part was that I felt no shame or guilt.  I felt like a Valiant Crusader, embodying a swirling Hurricane of justice. 

My cloak would have come in handy that day, too.

I feel your pain and can only offer support, but I'm afraid I lack the clarity to offer guidance.  At least we are not alone, friend. 

[Rudest]

*covets the stairs* I will cherish them forever Jack.

[Learn To Love Yourself]

Rudest wrote...

*covets the stairs* I will cherish them forever Jack.

It's my pleasure, Rudest.  One cycle at a time, brother.  One cycle at a time.

[Rudest]

Jack. I feel like I can confide in you my comrade; I've been suffering from persecution and subsequently, the pangs of anxiety. When I fill out job applications I neglect to mention I am incapable of ducking or rolling, or my fanatical love for automatic weaponry. These traits are seemingly unwanted in the work place. Furthermore, dextro-amino friendly cafeterias are few and far between.

I also feel as if stop drop and roll procedure is thinly veiled racism against Turians.

[DullahansXMark]

This... This gets five stars.

[Ninja Stan]

Spam.

End of line.