449 réponses à ce sujet

[Striker93175]

Joined a lobby. Leader (talking about his buddy) says: "Player XYZ will be right back he's - squeezing off a giant turd real quick."  Left lobby.

Modifié par Striker93175, 27 novembre 2012 - 07:25 .

[DragonRacer]

t_skwerl wrote...

Collector swarms. "NOOOO, I'M COVERED IN BEEEEEES!" If someone has a mic, someone always says this and it always cracks me up.

Some guy had either a faulty mic or a voice translation program that made him sound like Alvin and/or the chipmunks. Couldn't even get out of the lobby I was laughing so hard.

The PS3 has mic settings you can go in and play around with... up to Alvin the Chipmunk and down to Barry White.

My husband used to turn it all the way down so he'd sound like his Krogan in-match. Hilarious.

[Sailears]

Just yesterday - an SI joins the lobby, says (in best Arnie voice) - "I'm here to protect you."

Made me laugh

[OliveiraAM]

Yesterday, i was playing with a phoenixguard on vancouver
we faced a cerberus turret, and one guy in the party said: "There is a turret" right in the moment i smashed it.
I said "was".

I cracked up with them for the rest of the match.

[TheCinC]

BiowareHeph wrote...

I was playing with a guy who was at his uncle's house, and his uncle was away for a couple hours. Somehow, they managed to lock themselves out of the bathroom, and his friend had to go bad. So he kicked down the door. I spent the rest of the match listening to "WTF do you mean, you kicked down the door?" "No, I can't help you, I'm in the middle of a game" "No, you can't make it look like it's not broken" "He's gonna kick your ass when he gets back." "You can't just kick down someone else bathroom door!" "Yes, I understand you couldn't wait." etc etc etc.

It was hilarious.

Ok, most of these are pretty good, but that one actually made me laugh out loud. Thanks for sharing! 

[DeadeyeCYclops]

this thread has been done b4 and i dunno who it was but one sticks in my mind to this day:

Someone was complaining to his wife to hurrry up and make him a beef jerky and mayo sandwich.....

I just....... i .... umm....yeah wth that combo just is ... weird as hell

i didnt read all the posts, not sure if that person who heard this has already mentioned it in this thread, but yeah it  still  is one of those things i will likely never forget

Modifié par DeadeyeCYclops78, 27 novembre 2012 - 07:48 .

[Qu1nnC]

After an unsuccessful match with randoms one guy said with a laugh

"geez I haven't got a beating like that since my step dad quit drinking"

[Abramsrunner]

I think about 4-5 months ago I overheard someone say that the Eagle is the pistol in the game.
I believe he had it at rank 2.

[Lajkos]

Yoshiyuki Ly wrote...

Lajkos wrote...

Some dude's wife giving birth (or something), he was pretty torn between that and the game. The game won

Are you serious?? LOL

very serious

[DeathIsHere]

theillusiveman11 wrote...

"You're a ****ing philanthropist!" Or something like that. Insulting me.

Also any of the conspiracy theories about why people couldn't missile glitch immediately after Bioware removed Cobra wind up time.

Being a philanthropist is a good thing though, that means you're a charitable person and are very caring.

[M-pod]

The funniest, and the cutest, thing I've heard so far over the mic was a father talking to his son. He must've been only 5-6 years(the kid that is).

He was telling his son that they could play together and then the son started playing, and he started telling his son how to shoot and pickup things and everything.

Yes, cutest and funniest in my eyes. =)

[sandboxgod]

 Was playing with some dude one night when the turian ghoost first came out. He was standing on an incline frantically firing his little jets screaming, "This h%@ is all up in my business!" when the banshee got too close

One day I dropped down to Silver with my freshly promoted human infiltrator. I join the match and noticed I could hear the high pitched squeal of a pre-puberty male asking me, "Where is your Drone?"  I replied, "I'm a Human sniper I dont have a drone". After awhile I realize they are two young boys probably from the south. They made me laugh everytime one of them got caught by a banshee. The older boy would always yell he's coming to rescue "his best homie". It would seem like they would pledge their loyalty to each other every so often if one of them died. They had deep southern accents too. Was hard to understand them. I think I played like 2 games with them before I had to logout 

[crypticevincar]

SeanThen1 wrote...

Miclotov wrote...

American person speaking about his white supremacy and other racist things.

We've played with the same guy! Dude is a CREEPER!

Oh I'm very willing to bet there's more than one of these in a game where you run around shooting people that have different ideas than you do.

[Geta-Boshi]

Me joining an in-progress match as a Volus "There's no need to fear, Underdog is here!"

[Darthvero]

Hearing a guy sing "call me maybe" word for word while the song plays in the background. I couldn't mute him fast enough.

[Wookie_Smuggler]

Husks: Sexual Deviants ( they try to hump you)
Scion: Pimple (it's a breakout if you see 3 or more)
Ravager: Scrotums
Swarms: THE BEES
Praetorian: Zoidberg
Banshee: Paris Hilton

[Gamecontact]

During Cerberus gold: I was using SI with Claymore. Player 1 and Player 2 were talking in mic.
Site note: I was killing everybody with my Claymore.
Player 1: Quickly get some ammo.
*Everybody runs to ammo box*
Player 1: Atlas and Phantoms incoming!
Player 2: Don't worry Mr.Claymore will handle them...

Modifié par Gamecontact, 27 novembre 2012 - 08:37 .

[Cakekey]

In Gold on Xbox Live, in a chat party with my friend. It's still possible to hear in-game voices through the television speakers, and, upon seeing me shanked by a Phantom on Wave 10, I heard an unknown player shout: "NO! THEY GOT JIMMY!!!"

My name's not Jimmy, but I appreciated the consideration.

[Smallpox_Jenkins]

If i'm playing one of the Ex-Cerberus guys against Cerberus and go up against a Dragoon, I say stuff like 'Oh you wanna whip? I'm the whip master! I got whips for days!' or if someone joins the party or game 'Welcome to Whips 101.'

[vliktor]

I remember this one match, condor/gold/reapers. there was this australian (?) dude, and 2 'mericans (assumptions about their nationalities are based on how i interpreted their accents). The australian kept talking to the other american about game mechanics, buffs, etc... basically stuff that anyone diligent enough should already know. the australian was getting quite annoying IMHO, but i really just didn't mind. the american was just cool about the whole thing (aahhh, OK, that's cool, I didn't know that)....

then, with the australian dude still 'educating' us about MP, the other guy suddenly out of nowhere suddenly shouts "SHUT UP, B IT CH". I was a bit startled myself. Then the guy simply says, "I was referring to those annoying banshees.." Riiiiight, I said to myself.

I had a chuckle, we had full extraction. Good times.

Modifié par vliktor, 27 novembre 2012 - 08:39 .

[BadgerladDK]

"You're indoctrinated!"

XBL friend who knows I'm Danish, upon discovering that not only do I swear like a sailor when I forget my mic is on, I instinctively do it in English after 10+ years of online gaming with people from all over the world.

[CaliJoe090]

paranoio wrote...

Was playing a random, with some guys that apparently know each other well... we did a few matches together, and it took me "helloffatime" to understand what enemies they were referering to, in their drinken haze.. here a short list, og what i remember:

Guardians: Turtles
Atlas: Trashcans
Dragoons: Ponies
Phantoms: sniper *****es
Engineers: Social workers

Banshees: Long legged huggers/ladies/screamers
Brutes: Puppies
Ravagers: cheaters

Abominations: Boomboom - Posessed: BOOMBOOOOOOM (imagine that over the mic) >.>
preatorians: big flyer
Swarms: Flyers

Cant remember the rest.. all of this was said with a somewhat drunk, and semi non understandable accent

Yes! This! I'd totally do this!

[DarkOdrib]

When Player X's mother was telling the kid to eat all his vegetables and the kid was screaming about how the fate of the galaxy was on his shoulders.

[Enigma SS]

It's always the random things that make me laugh.

I was playing once with some try-hard GI who would run off on his own and kept getting killed. Some kid kept reviving him and dying and eventually ran out of medi-gels. So the kid said "Hey guys I'm out of medi-gels" on like wave 5, and the GI talked for the first time and said "SHUT THE **** UP YOU STUPID KID" and left the game and the kid said "Hey that's very nice." It was really random but made me laugh.

Another random one was some kid during a match said "Mommy can you wheel out of the room?".

Best one was when I was playing with randoms and we were all using asari adepts back in the day. I remember at one point we were talking about weak spots on banshees and some guy said don't aim for her armor piercing nipples.

[Slojack]

A couple were arguing while the mike was open and this transpired

(W)oman- I dont deserve this.
(M)an- No. You deserve much worse.
W- At least Im not the one that got a jerked off by a haitian masseuse!
M- G DAMM!T THAT WAS 2 WEEKS AGO. WHY DO YOU KEEP BRINGING UP THE PAST!!!!

About that time somebody else in the lobby says that we can hear you and the mic was shut off; I was mad as hell the guy told them, as it was getting good