Hackett: Shepard, I know you're on a desperate hunt for Saren, and even your journal tells you this is a race against time, but I need you to conduct some special forces missions in-between your investigation. You're in no hurry, right?
Shepard: I can't. I'm trying to save all life in the galaxy from certain extinction here, and Saren's constantly eluding me, so unless this is somehow related to that....
Hackett: First, I need you to conduct raids against Geth forces in the Armstrong Nebula.
Shepard: Sounds good enough. If we can deprive Saren of Geth support...
Hackett: Then, I need you to flush out some mercenaries in this other system.
Shepard: Uhm, sure, but how is this related to....
Hackett: Then I need you to save some bigwig politician captured by biotic fanatics.
Shepard: You do know you have dozens of N7 soldiers who specialize in this exact sort of thing and aren't chasing a mad Spectre...
Hackett: Then I need you to help Major Kyle through his PTSD.
Shepard: WTF?!
Mass Effect 2 (Arrival)
Hackett: Shepard, I know I just told you that the evidence against you is shoddy at best, but we still need you to come and face charges on Earth.
Shepard: What? WHY? If the evidence against me is as weak as you claim, then arresting me is declaring an admission of guilt in neon lights. Can't we just pin it on Kenson? The Batarians already know she was there....
Hackett: No, the Batarians will not be satisifed with a dead scapegoat.
Shepard: So do the smart thing. Pin it on some other Alliance marine who's currently facing charges. I'm friends with the two most powerful information brokers in the galaxy, and if I give one of them a call, I'm sure they can fabricate some evidence to arrest another scapegoat. I need to find a way to stop the army of Space Chtulus breathing down our necks....
Hackett: No. It must be you.
Shepard: Why?
Hackett: Because reasons.
Shepard: At least promise me you'll prepare for the Reapers while I'm in lockup.
Hackett: LOLNOPE!
Mass Effect 3
Hackett: Despite my complete inability to display any semblance of tactical or strategic competence in the battle for Earth, I am going to declare with complete conviction that we cannot win this war conventionally, and that all our hopes lie in this mystery device whose functions nor purpose anybody understands.
Scientist 1: Well, I just found a ton of platinum. It'll come in really handy for medical technology as the Reapers decimate our medical centres. We may be able to save millions of lives.....
Hackett: No. Pour it all into the Crucible.
Scientist 1: But....
Hackett: ALL OF IT, I SAY!!!
Scientist 2: Admiral, I know we're all desperate here, but have you ever thought the Crucible might be a trap? I mean we all thought the Citadel was Prothean technology, and nobody ever really understood that either, and look how that worked out for every cycle before us....
Hackett: I still don't see your point. Continue working on our salvation. Did I mention we can't win this conventionally?
(Pre-Cronos Station Battle)
Hackett: Our intelligence points to Cerberus holding the information about the Catalyst. Therefore, the only logical thing to do is have the Fifth Fleet launch an all out attack against Cronos Station that will reveal the existence of the Crucible and force us to immediately march to Earth.
Shepard: Have you even tried sending in double agents or shadow operatives to retrieve it without being so unnecessarily dramatic? Why can't I use a Turian/Salarian/Hanar/Asari fleet and not reveal the eistence of the Crucible to the Reapers? Bloody hell, what if the Catalyst is another device that needs to be built for 6 months? What do we do then?
Hackett: NO! This is the only sensible course of action. BECAUSE WE CAN'T WIN CONVENTIONALLY!!!
(Pre-Earth Battle)
Hackett: So the Reapers now have the Catalyst. This indicates that the only strategy we can use against them is to fly directly at them in perfect formation.
Shepard: What? Why can't we do something more innovative than tactics that were obsolete in Napoleon's time? I mean, we can send empty (and useless) cargo freighters programmed by rudimentary VIs at FTL speeds to go crashing into Reapers; or we could imitate the Turians and have some fleets FTL behind the Reapers and then sandwich them between multiple fleets as they sturggle to turn around (since they're all standing in formation around Earth anyway). Better yet, why not study the Human Reaper and the Reaper blueprints we datamined from the Collector Base to try and find some structural weaknesses (the exact smae thing the Turians did with the Tuchanka Destroyer)? Anything has got to be better than flying straight at them....
Hackett: BECAUSE WE CAN'T WIN THIS CONVENTIONALLY!
(Later)
Hackett: So our plan is to have our ground forces rush at this beam the Reapers have connecting to the Citadel.
Shepard: This doesn't seem the least bit suspicious to you? We still have no idea what the Crucible does, the Catalyst is Reaper tech, and a race of super intelligent god-machines has left a very convenient beam on that is only a liability to them...
Hackett: Why don't you blame Anderson for this idea.....
Shepard: Anderson's been fighting Space Chtulus and zombie hordes continuously for 6 months on ground zero. I'm surprised he's still sane enough to put together a coherent sentence. You've spent the last 6 months doing nothing but sipping martinis and pouring every valuable resource we have into a giant Maybe.
Hackett: This is the only way Shepard, because....
Shepard: Dare I even ask.....
Hackett: BECAUSE WE CAN'T WIN THIS CONVENTIONALLY!
(At the Catalyst chamber)
Catalyst: So you must either destroy all synthetic life, along with the Mass Relays. Or you can control the Reapers and become a Space Techno-God. Or you can jump into some green space magic.
Shepard: So the Crucible only allows me to do 3 different flavours of stupid?
Catalyst: Yes.
Shepard: Why am I not surprised?
Catalyst: What is your choice?
Shepard: What if I refuse you?
Catalyst: Everybody dies.
Shepard: Including Hackett?
Catalyst: Yes.
Shepard: F*ck it. I refuse.
Modifié par grey_wind, 17 décembre 2012 - 02:37 .





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